EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Non-investing personal finance issues including insurance, credit, real estate, taxes, employment and legal issues such as trusts and wills.
sailaway
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by sailaway »

Irene wrote: Fri Jan 31, 2025 6:50 pm
ladycat wrote: Fri Jan 31, 2025 12:43 pm Not surprised that this thread has been male-dominated.
I (female) update my spouse (male), periodically with the big-picture of our household financials. Bank balances, if we need to earmark more for a large expenditure, if I took RMDs from inherited IRAs, how taxes are being withheld/paid.
Income exceeds expenses, bills are paid, and that's all he's concerned about.
Our household is similar. I've always paid the bills, done the taxes, and back when we kept a much more careful budget, I was the one spending the time sitting with Quicken making sure things were labeled. Heck, I used to input grocery receipts every day, splitting the transactions into "food" and "household." My husband, like me, was raised by Depression babies, but his response was to have a lot of anxiety about money and hate dealing with any of it, whereas mine was to obsess about details, sometimes usefully, sometimes not.
We have had a few different arrangements, but my husband missed a single bill when he first developed chronic pain and handed 100% over to me. He has since taken on a charity case that he set up a separate account for, but I still make sure he has the funds to make the transfer. From 2018 to mid 2024, we could probably count up the times he so much as pulled a credit card out of his wallet. I tell him the total when I add up our portfolio, let him know when I rebalance or sell anything, but he doesn't always process it beyond "she has it under control." I have found that sometimes when he is daydreaming he pulls up the spreadsheet to think about whether or not we could areas things to afford X.
David_Cary
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by David_Cary »

Good discussion and a reminder that all relationships are unique.

My wife asked me to keep a running spreadsheet so that at least an account doesn't get lost - in the bus scenario. It also lists life insurance policies. She isn't regularly interested in details but every once in a while will ask me how much we have left on our mortgage.

My wife is much less risk tolerant than I am. It was pretty straightforward to have a discussion on AA and that is a line on the spreadsheet. She is one who intellectually knows to be invested in stocks but still doesn't like it.

I am in no way a receipt counter or tabulator. But with electronic accounts, a spreadsheet is pretty easy to set up. With credit card EOY statements, even looking at budget is pretty easy.

I have a quick EOY statement that says things like $15k on housing (tax, hoa, insurance, maintenance) and has 10-15 lines overall. That is the level of detail which works for us.
Parkinglotracer
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by Parkinglotracer »

jebmke wrote: Tue Jan 14, 2025 8:41 am My spouse has full access to account details so I keep our annual snapshot very simple; it used to be more complicated but I realize it was information that was unrelated to actions so I killed off a lot of detail.

What we have (equity, fixed, total).

What is our total income (all sources)

What is our total spending -- total dollars that went out the door never to return again, no matter what it was for.

It is a quick meeting, shrugs on both sides.
This is great. This is about how ours goes. I have a list of our financial assets - where they are and how much. I have our asset allocation. She knows what comes in and she knows what goes out. She knows how the bills are paid. She knows how to access all accounts and which are taxable and which are not. She understands our tax return. It is a quick meeting, smiles and shrugs on both sides. She says if she passes away and I get remarried and the money we have saved doesn’t go to our kids she will haunt me from the grave. I believe her threat.
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Sandi_k
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by Sandi_k »

My DH doesn't care much, because he knows that I do. :D

In 2023, I subscribed to Tiller Money, and connected our accounts - it allows auto-categorization, and major categories. So I now have more than a year of actual spending data, grouped into buckets of spending.

Our big buckets are taxes, and housing. 25% each of our gross income. Retirement savings is the next big item - and it stops this year.

Then everything else is diminishing returns:

Food - groceries and restaurants? 10%
Medical - premiums, co-pays, glasses, prescriptions? 8%
Travel? 5%
Auto Expenses? 5%
Utilities? 5%

This is all the detail he wants or needs, although I do make him log on twice per year to pay the bills. :D

I also give him threshold updates, when the mortgage balance levels down, or investments reach a new balance. And we have a once-a-year financial summit, as we compile our annual tax data for our preparer.
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BattyNatty
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by BattyNatty »

SnowBog wrote: Thu Jan 30, 2025 4:38 pm
  • Full page Wall Chart (again from Your Money or Your Life), helps visualize our spending vs. "budget" (where we above/below budget) vs. a SWR estimate, with the idea being when the SWR estimate is higher than expenses you can retire
I had never heard of this Wall Chart before - looks interesting - thanks!
David_Cary wrote: Sat Feb 01, 2025 4:21 am Good discussion and a reminder that all relationships are unique.
I have to admit I didn't think I needed to preface my question with a sworn statement that I was not torturing my spouse. :sharebeer
lunch_money
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by lunch_money »

I started to use a Sankey diagram a couple of years ago and it’s done a good job showing an overview of the year and where the big spends have been. That has been more useful than a line by line budget analysis vs. target (which I still do, but we don’t hold to it rigorously so that’s more for me).

There are free online tools that are easy to generate input for from an Excel tracking spreadsheet. It also was interesting to me since I usually ignored taxes and pretax savings.
SnowBog
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by SnowBog »

lunch_money wrote: Mon Feb 03, 2025 8:19 am I started to use a Sankey diagram a couple of years ago and it’s done a good job showing an overview of the year and where the big spends have been. That has been more useful than a line by line budget analysis vs. target (which I still do, but we don’t hold to it rigorously so that’s more for me).

There are free online tools that are easy to generate input for from an Excel tracking spreadsheet. It also was interesting to me since I usually ignored taxes and pretax savings.
FWIW that's one of my favorite views/reports in Monarch Money! I started manually adding transactions for savings out of paycheck (that didn't otherwise show up) just to better show the saving amount. Suppose I should add in our withholding for a more complete picture - but haven't done that yet...
sailaway
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by sailaway »

SnowBog wrote: Mon Feb 03, 2025 8:56 am
lunch_money wrote: Mon Feb 03, 2025 8:19 am I started to use a Sankey diagram a couple of years ago and it’s done a good job showing an overview of the year and where the big spends have been. That has been more useful than a line by line budget analysis vs. target (which I still do, but we don’t hold to it rigorously so that’s more for me).

There are free online tools that are easy to generate input for from an Excel tracking spreadsheet. It also was interesting to me since I usually ignored taxes and pretax savings.
FWIW that's one of my favorite views/reports in Monarch Money! I started manually adding transactions for savings out of paycheck (that didn't otherwise show up) just to better show the saving amount. Suppose I should add in our withholding for a more complete picture - but haven't done that yet...
While I think Sankey diagrams look cool, they do not help me process information. This is definitely a case of knowing the person the report is for.
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WoodSpinner
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by WoodSpinner »

ladycat wrote: Fri Jan 31, 2025 12:43 pm Not surprised that this thread has been male-dominated.
I (female) update my spouse (male), periodically with the big-picture of our household financials. Bank balances, if we need to earmark more for a large expenditure, if I took RMDs from inherited IRAs, how taxes are being withheld/paid.
Income exceeds expenses, bills are paid, and that's all he's concerned about.
Curious of you face different challenges than we do (I am male) in having these discussions?

WoodSpinner
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SnowBog
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by SnowBog »

sailaway wrote: Mon Feb 03, 2025 8:59 am
SnowBog wrote: Mon Feb 03, 2025 8:56 am

FWIW that's one of my favorite views/reports in Monarch Money! I started manually adding transactions for savings out of paycheck (that didn't otherwise show up) just to better show the saving amount. Suppose I should add in our withholding for a more complete picture - but haven't done that yet...
While I think Sankey diagrams look cool, they do not help me process information. This is definitely a case of knowing the person the report is for.
+1

As I had noted before, I create the report for myself, with a secondary use for my spouse.

But your point is excellent, as I've changed a few things over the years to better align with how my spouse reads/uses them. My one-page summary that is available every month is an example. It distills down everything else into a "stoplight" type view, are we red/yellow/green on budget/savings/plan progress, and how does that compare to prior period. This was at the request, and with input, from my spouse to get to what really mattered (that they cared about).

In full transparency, it doesn't get used as much monthly anymore... It really helped as we started out, but things are largely on autopilot now, and we are ahead of plan, so have gotten more lax in review. But it's still created and available every month as agreed...
lunch_money
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by lunch_money »

Jayhawk11 wrote: Mon Jan 20, 2025 1:59 pm 1. Most adorable picture of our kids from that year;
I mentioned this to my spouse and now I have to include it in mine! :D
ladycat
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by ladycat »

WoodSpinner wrote: Mon Feb 03, 2025 9:01 am
ladycat wrote: Fri Jan 31, 2025 12:43 pm Not surprised that this thread has been male-dominated.
I (female) update my spouse (male), periodically with the big-picture of our household financials. Bank balances, if we need to earmark more for a large expenditure, if I took RMDs from inherited IRAs, how taxes are being withheld/paid.
Income exceeds expenses, bills are paid, and that's all he's concerned about.
Curious of you face different challenges than we do (I am male) in having these discussions?

WoodSpinner
We are on equal footing when it comes to knowledge and ability to manage our finances.
He believes we earned enough, saved enough, have an adequate plan, and can enjoy some of it. The small stuff is of no consequence, and we can only plan so much for an unpredictable future. Beyond that, money management is a chore that needs to be done. I think more about long-term unknowns. Maybe that’s because I’m likely to live several years beyond his expiration date and will be left holding the bag (full or empty).
travelnut11
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by travelnut11 »

Nice to see some of the wives chiming in as the money managers for a change.

I'm the female half of the equation and the sole money manager because I enjoy it. My husband could truly care less and I often joke that I could be robbing him blind and he would have no idea. :D What I do is once a year after the taxes are done, the bonuses paid, the expenses in Quicken updated, etc. we have a brief meeting where I show him our Quicken information. He cares about the total Net Worth number and occasionally amuses himself with what we spent in the various expense categories and that's about it.

I do have a single page document titled "What to Do if Mom Croaks" which gives him a general idea what to do if I die (call my boss, life insurance number, call Social Security, etc) and a list of the institutions where we have money and the nature (401k, IRA, checking, etc). I don't include the account numbers or anything because I don't like having all of that information concentrated in one place in case it gets into the wrong hands. It's enough to get him started should the worst-case scenario happen.
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celia
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by celia »

kd2008 wrote: Mon Jan 13, 2025 3:03 pm I initially thought about doing this in January like you, but DH said no. Mid December is a good time to sum up the year. Doing it in January felt like looking back and hence "diminutive"
I summarize/ update everything as soon as I finish the tax return. I think it makes more sense for your numbers to match the tax return. And if that tax return was to be audited, your "death" records might help you answer what the IRS wants.

BattyNatty wrote: Mon Jan 13, 2025 2:45 pm
Right now, the EOY document covers:
  • Spending vs. Budget by Category for prior year
  • Budget by Category for next year
  • Two-Income Trap Evaluation (see if/how we'd survive on just the lower of our two salaries)
  • Charts showing how our income and spending has changed over time
  • Earnings summary
  • Mortgage status
  • Net worth status
  • Charts showing how our net worth has changed over time, broken out by account type
  • Retirement projections
I hope each of these is one-page each, else it will turn into a history book. :)
Is there anything else I could include in the EOY Report to ensure it is as holistic as possible? Anything else you make sure to discuss with your spouse about your finances?
I second the response of whoever said "insurance". Tell which insurances you have (and DON'T have). Include medical, homeowners, liability, vehicles, earthquake/ flood/ tornado (whatever applies to you) and where you get it from and where the policies are kept. If you have Life, include that and when you no longer have it, include that too so someone doesn't waste time looking for it.

Then I would list each credit card and the checking account and list what is automatically charged on it. I realized recently that if our wallets were lost or stolen while traveling, some bills would stop being paid since our new credit cards would get new numbers. So I set aside the one used most often for house bills (utilities, insurance, wifi) so it would always be in a safe place at home.

How about listing names, phone, address of people the survivor might consult with, like lawyers, tax preparers, financial advisors, and tradesmen who have worked on your house that you would hire again. You could even list the year last used and what they did. If you have't used someone in 10 years, it's probably time to find a replacement.

If you are over 50, a one-page summary of retirement resources could help. Would each or one of you be eligible for SS or pensions? Describe the option of starting SS at 70, if appropriate for you. If your family savings need to be spent, which account(s) should be spent down first and why those?

DH is proud to have his own tax advisor (me) although I have him track down all the tax forms that came in the mail and were thrown in "the box" based on a "list of our tax forms" I created several years ago. If he has questions about the year-end summary, I try to update the summary so it makes sense to him. And once I'm gone, he'll still need to round up all the tax forms each year.
chillwill
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Re: EOY Report on Personal Finances for Spouse

Post by chillwill »

I do something similar to this called a Rich Life Review as a PowerPoint presentation. Net Worth, AA, Monthly/Yearly Expenses, Short/Long Term Goals. I recently started adding fun photos from the year of the DW and I to spice up the white space a bit. She seems to enjoy it.
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