Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Non-investing personal finance issues including insurance, credit, real estate, taxes, employment and legal issues such as trusts and wills.
Wannaretireearly
Posts: 4847
Joined: Wed Mar 31, 2010 4:39 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Wannaretireearly »

Not sure I’ve seen this in the thread yet…

Rhetorical Q:
I wish I’d have known my expenses will decrease/stabilize considerably in my slow-go years from age 70 onwards?

I’m asking this question, and focusing on age 70 for 2 reasons. Social Security will be a guaranteed income factor for most of us. Age 70 is when I’ve seen folks who have been relatively healthy, start cropping up with health issues that impede (expensive) travel/fun etc. Some of these folks in my family really wanted to travel in retirement, but waited until 70+ to retire.

I ask this question above, as the more I think about retirement finances and go-go years when most fun can be had, it revolves around a 20 year period (in my case) from 50 to 70. So, why don’t my retirement finances and planning reflect this vs. some Xpenses related number/multiple?
“At some point you are trading time you will never get back for money you will never spend.“ | “How do you want to spend the best remaining year of your life?“
mikejuss
Posts: 2749
Joined: Tue Jun 23, 2020 1:36 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by mikejuss »

TheTimeLord wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 9:33 am I will repeat the one I have mentioned several times but seems to be unique to me based on feedback here. I never realized how much my plans would be impacted by the finances of friends and family. Other people budgets seem to control more things than my budget. Never saw that coming.
Interesting comment. Is that because you support certain friends and family members?
50% VTSAX | 25% VTIAX | 25% VBTLX (retirement), 25% VTEAX (taxable)
punkinhead
Posts: 349
Joined: Sun Jun 27, 2021 4:02 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by punkinhead »

Harry Livermore wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 7:49 am
I find it odd when couples who are finally free (or on the cusp of being free) of ongoing obligations (work, minor or adult children, mortgages) willingly sign up for another 10 or 15 stint as "pet parents". I'm not disparaging pet ownership. It's wonderful and can be an excellent aid in mental health for many.
And I get it, you can board the pets and go. But I think it would be part of the welcome change of life to be truly free for a few years (folks that age are often soon-to-be grandparents, or soon-to-be caretakers of their own parents)
We've always been dog owners but had the same thought you expressed above when we were within a couple years of retirement and the kids were gone. We swore when our last dog passed it would be our last until we were too feeble to travel. But when she passed we got another one anyway because we're dog people. Most people, including those that travel "a lot" spend much more time at home than they do traveling. And when we're home we want a dog. Now that my wife and I are both retired we haven't found the dog to cramp our style at all. Most of our traveling works fine with a dog - many hotels, cabins, and AirBnBs allow pets. Vacations for us are outdoor activities like hiking, canoeing, and offroading in a side by side so having the dog along makes it even better. For the few times the dog would be a burden we have neighbor kids that are happy to stop by the house multiple times a day to feed and walk her. We have an RV on order and once that arrives the dog will come on every trip. We attended a get together at a campground yesterday for owners of the RV brand we have on order and every one camped there except one couple had either a dog or a cat. The one place where having a dog would be a pain is if you liked to eat at restaurants when you travel. We tend to only rent places with a kitchen so we can cook for ourselves - not because of the dog, but because it's healthier and cheaper. But the side benefit is not having to figure out what to do with the dog while we're eating.
Last edited by punkinhead on Sun Jun 05, 2022 9:31 am, edited 4 times in total.
lostdog
Posts: 5361
Joined: Thu Feb 04, 2016 1:15 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by lostdog »

helloeveryone wrote: Fri Jun 03, 2022 5:23 pm
sailaway wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:26 am
AerialWombat wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:23 am I FIREd last year, in my early 40s. I wish I had given greater consideration to the fact that everybody else my age is still working M-F.
Psst, you are allowed to play with people who aren't your age.
yup. i go biking and hiking w friends 10 years older who are in better shape than me. Feels awesome keeping up with them versus struggling against fit athletes my
age
Same. When I go to the gym in the morning or late morning, it's mostly the retired. I am in my mid 40's. Most of them are in really good shape.

When I go biking during the day or late mornings, I stop and eat my lunch at the local parks. They're vacant, quiet and very beautiful.
Stocks-80% || Bonds-20% || VTI/VXUS/AOR
User avatar
CyclingDuo
Posts: 5989
Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2017 8:07 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by CyclingDuo »

Cruise wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 1:29 am Surprise things learned on retirement:

1. When I retired I met a number of people who seemed less-then-happy to learn I was retired. Really weird jealousy vibes.

2. It is possible to have more take-home income when retired than working. At least that is the case with my wife: Her pension take home exceeds her work take home because she is no longer getting payroll deductions for parking, healthcare, state income tax, Medicare and FICA, and three retirement plans.

3. One’s spouse may not retire on the timeline one expects.
These are all discussions that interest us.

1. I am still working and am always dumbfounded by some of the opposite. I work with clients/customers and even though over the past three years I was 58, 59, and now 60, occasionally some of the clients would ask me "Why are you still working?" with a tone in their voice that is similar to what you mention. Maybe I am taking it wrong, but just mentioning I find it odd to be asked that question and the tone used.

2. I used to have some mild concerns about this (at least in terms of taxes and it being a problem). Due to delaying SS, having a pension, the size of our nest egg, and both working into our 60's - we will most likely find ourselves in the more take-home income during retirement than our working years scenario. Of course, things could change, but at least with our current plan the potential is there - especially once SS and RMD's all kick in down the road a bit. Gives us some option B's such as me being able to call an audible when my wife retires next year as to my employment status, or the option to move to a higher cost of living area, etc... .

3. Spouse retires next year at 65 1/2. That leaves me as the wildcard for a retirement timeline since I am 4 years younger. We have discussed expected timelines, and part of that discussion includes staggering our retirements to avoid too much of a shock being together 24/7 - at least during the first year. I still enjoy working and don't really want to pull the plug quite yet, so the ongoing discussion will continue as she wants to up and move to a different area of the country. That sets up the scenario of one of us upsetting the other person's timeline and expectations (although I could get a job transfer that I am starting to look into...).

Anyway, would be interested to hear what others have gone through regarding the three points you listed and how it all is working out. I am probably more interested in point 3. Any advice on staggering retirement dates for the adjustment?

CyclingDuo
"Save like a pessimist, invest like an optimist." - Morgan Housel | "Pick a bushel, save a peck!" - Grandpa
User avatar
TheTimeLord
Posts: 12092
Joined: Fri Jul 26, 2013 2:05 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by TheTimeLord »

mikejuss wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 9:15 am
TheTimeLord wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 9:33 am I will repeat the one I have mentioned several times but seems to be unique to me based on feedback here. I never realized how much my plans would be impacted by the finances of friends and family. Other people budgets seem to control more things than my budget. Never saw that coming.
Interesting comment. Is that because you support certain friends and family members?
No, here is how I answered this question previously. In addition to the actual ability to afford to do something, there is the question of is it worth to the other individuals. This really never came up with trip while I was working but has been an issue with bucket list type trips. For some people they may have looked forward to going somewhere for years and want the full experience for others just being there is enough and the full experience isn't worth the cost.
TheTimeLord wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 3:30 pm Whether you eating out or taking a trip when it involves others you usually need to be considerate of whoever has the tightest budget. So while there are things I would like to do with friends or family, it may not fit their budget. I guess I always assumed the people around me were on a similar financial path, but that was an erroneous assumption.
IMHO, Investing should be about living the life you want, not avoiding the life you fear. | Run, You Clever Boy! [9085]
Topic Author
Hugh Prolly-Wright
Posts: 67
Joined: Thu Sep 15, 2016 8:10 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Hugh Prolly-Wright »

summerof42 wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 6:25 am
Hugh Prolly-Wright wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 8:55 am
JPH wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 8:06 am After I retired and seriously started understanding my finances I discovered that I could have retired a lot earlier!
This is interesting. I've been tracking spending for several years, and as I think about how much money is needed, I need to remember that certain expenses will go away once I stop working.
I’ve ever understood that belief. Exactly what expenses “go away onceI stop working,”. To me, the expenses are the same or higher when taking into account you lose your great health benefits at work (health, dental, vision, etc) and Medicare and a Supplemental Plan, plus Rx plan cost more. Not to mention the cost of Rx are typically higher. You still eat the same amount of food, you still pay for all the same utilities, drive around. . . So what expenses “go away?” I only see higher expenses go away if you’ve paid off your mortgage, which most of us are not so fortunate, or you move into a smaller home.

Please enlighten me.
There's a small expense of commuting + no more payroll tax + decrease in amount we give to charity (which we base on our present income level).
For us, combining these will amount to about 20K per year.
User avatar
Sandi_k
Posts: 2292
Joined: Sat May 16, 2015 11:55 am
Location: SF Bay Area

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Sandi_k »

jebmke wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 8:13 am
JDave wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 8:07 am A rule of thumb when estimating supplies for construction is to figure out what you need, then add 15%.
I think that's a good idea to apply to retirement budget planning.
essentially what I did. Ground up "budget" of about 8-10 broad categories then a 10% contingency. It has been remarkably accurate (in total - category amounts were an unmitigated disaster).
@jebmke - which ones were an unmitigated disaster? Inquiring minds!
User avatar
Sandi_k
Posts: 2292
Joined: Sat May 16, 2015 11:55 am
Location: SF Bay Area

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Sandi_k »

CyclingDuo wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 9:37 am
3. Spouse retires next year at 65 1/2. That leaves me as the wildcard for a retirement timeline since I am 4 years younger. We have discussed expected timelines, and part of that discussion includes staggering our retirements to avoid too much of a shock being together 24/7 - at least during the first year. I still enjoy working and don't really want to pull the plug quite yet, so the ongoing discussion will continue as she wants to up and move to a different area of the country. That sets up the scenario of one of us upsetting the other person's timeline and expectations (although I could get a job transfer that I am starting to look into...).

Anyway, would be interested to hear what others have gone through regarding the three points you listed and how it all is working out. I am probably more interested in point 3. Any advice on staggering retirement dates for the adjustment?

CyclingDuo
Ha! Are you kidding? With Covid, we were together nearly 24/7 for 18 months!

No fears about retiring at the same time - we're looking forward to both of us having control over our time, and when to travel, when to wake up, when to visit family, etc.
AlwaysLearningMore
Posts: 1914
Joined: Sun Jul 26, 2020 2:29 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by AlwaysLearningMore »

Harry Livermore wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 7:49 am I find it odd when couples who are finally free (or on the cusp of being free) of ongoing obligations (work, minor or adult children, mortgages) willingly sign up for another 10 or 15 stint as "pet parents". I'm not disparaging pet ownership. It's wonderful and can be an excellent aid in mental health for many.
And I get it, you can board the pets and go. But I think it would be part of the welcome change of life to be truly free for a few years (folks that age are often soon-to-be grandparents, or soon-to-be caretakers of their own parents)
I'd think about a new pet AFTER a few years of freedom, to see if you really miss having a pet.
We have quite a different experience. We just finished dog sitting for a couple who just returned from a cruise. They're very good friends (sometimes we house sit for them when they travel), and they are wonderful to their pets (and ours). Wife used to work in a veterinarian's office and is quite knowledgeable about dogs and cats. They, in turn, dog sit for us when we travel. We all joke about who can spoil the dogs more (we win :D ).

So we have the benefit of the love and companionship of our dog all year round, and know he is in the loving care of "Aunt X" and "Uncle Y" when we travel. And our friends feel the same way about us. We have also dog sat for other couples.

Fortunately, because our beagle is completely adorable :happy (and well-behaved), he isn't any trouble when friends are watching him for us.
Last edited by AlwaysLearningMore on Sun Jun 05, 2022 4:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Retirement is best when you have a lot to live on, and a lot to live for. * None of what I post is investment advice.* | FIRE'd July 2023
User avatar
quantAndHold
Posts: 10141
Joined: Thu Sep 17, 2015 10:39 pm
Location: West Coast

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by quantAndHold »

MGBMartin wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 10:36 am I wish I had known coronavirus was coming and international travel would be off for a couple of years.
I would have traveled more before instead of holding off until full retirement income began .
This, except for a different reason. I would have kept my job skills up, and got a job during the time when we were all stuck at home. I was bored out of my mind those first few months, and even tried to go back to work, but I wasn’t really employable anymore.

Now we’re traveling less than we did, but have replaced the travel with activities that don’t require as much air travel. But it was an adjustment.
jebmke
Posts: 25273
Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2007 2:44 pm
Location: Delmarva Peninsula

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by jebmke »

Sandi_k wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 2:00 pm
jebmke wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 8:13 am
JDave wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 8:07 am A rule of thumb when estimating supplies for construction is to figure out what you need, then add 15%.
I think that's a good idea to apply to retirement budget planning.
essentially what I did. Ground up "budget" of about 8-10 broad categories then a 10% contingency. It has been remarkably accurate (in total - category amounts were an unmitigated disaster).
@jebmke - which ones were an unmitigated disaster? Inquiring minds!
Not a simple answer because I don't track details of actual expenses.

Looking at the budget numbers, I can deduce some big misses easily.

Travel - we traveled so much before retirement that when we finally retired, it wasn't that appealing. We are greatly underspending that number.
Medical - I made a fundamental mistake in the budget spreadsheet and forgot to multiply the per person cost by two. We are spending more on that.
Overall maintenance - House, grounds and pool - we have a three acre property and I clearly underestimated the maintenance cost.
Charitable Donations - we are doing a lot more than I anticipated.

Not sure which other categories are "savings" -- I did have a 10% contingency line item and obviously nothing gets actually spent in that. I'd guess we are spending less on food and restaurants. We don't eat out much since I stopped traveling for work and we got back to the US. US restaurants just aren't that appealing.
Stay hydrated; don't sweat the small stuff
pennywise
Posts: 970
Joined: Sat May 31, 2014 6:22 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by pennywise »

I wish I'd known two things that seem to negate each other, with #1 being:

Retirement does not entail sitting around vaguely enjoying life with nothing to do and no obligations to anyone. No stress, no aggravation, no commitments.

For us retirement in 2019 brought the steady decline of our remaining living aging parents with growing need for a tremendous amount of care and then the sad shock of spouse's only sibling becoming terminally ill in his late 60s.

Within 6 months last year one parent already in dementia care had a massive stroke that left a 98 year old vegetable, then the brother died then the other elderly parent died after a terribly difficult six months of mental and physical breakdown.

Our adult daughter was supposed to get married in a lovely family wedding that took a lot of planning. COVID turned that into a justice of the peace wedding far from family with only the two of them present.

Our adult son and much loved DIL experienced heartbreaking fertility losses followed finally by the birth of a miraculous first grandchild.

We remodeled our entire house. And so on and so on.

IOW life doesn't stop and retired or not there's a lot to do every day both joyful and difficult. Retirement didn't eliminate any of it.

However that is more than balanced out by what I wish I'd known #2:

Retirement brings the incredible luxury of managing whatever life flings at you with the entire burden of working for pay lifted! To have sufficient money flowing automatically into the bank monthly (we are blessed with double pensions/SS benefits), to never have to shoehorn personal or family duties around work schedules-this has been sweeter than I ever dreamed it would be.

I don't think anyone who isn't retired can really understand how amazing and freeing living like this is, till you experience it yourself.
capran
Posts: 1075
Joined: Thu Feb 18, 2016 9:45 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by capran »

In skimming through a few pages of answers, one I didn't see, and very much wish I had it on my radar, was the whole IRMAA penalty issue. Had I had that on my radar, I would have been very aggressive on my IRA to Roth conversions early on. (I retired at 61 and slow played the conversions because we didn't need any additional income. We could have converted another 100k per year those first 4 years.) The last few years we've been getting closer on our conversions to keep us just under the IRMAA threshold- last years MAGI was 188.8k
eddot98
Posts: 1193
Joined: Wed Jan 01, 2014 10:47 am
Location: The Berkshires

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by eddot98 »

delamer wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 8:40 am
eddot98 wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 8:14 am I wish that I knew that DW’s parents would require such an ever increasing amount of care and help that our early retirement at 59 would be negatively affected for over 11 years. It started slowly when they reached 80 or so while we were still working and finally became all consuming when they had to go to a nursing home and they were very difficult residents (and the nursing home was poorly run).
Most of the problems were unavoidable, but we didn’t anticipate the increasing level of involvement and their longevity. Their finances were a mess, although they had enough money to live frugally in their home, they never planned for possible nursing home care and they didn’t even have a will until DW made them write them in their mid 80’s. Although that was avoidable, FIL’s strong personality prevented any intervention before that.
You have my sympathy. It’s a tough situation and is bound to cause some marital strain.

My maternal grandmother ended up living with my parents (and me, for a big chunk of my childhood) for 20 years.

She was in her early 70’s when she moved in and died in her early 90’s.

My father did not talk about the situation much, but did tell me once that if he’d know she was going to live so long he probably would not have agreed to the arrangement. My mother had 3 siblings, so there could certainly were options in terms of a rotating home for my grandmother or providing financial aid for her to live independently (at least initially). There were no CCRCs or assisted living facilities then.
Thanks for your sympathy, but we got through it and DW could not have lived with herself if she had not helped out her parents. Our relationship is fine, but her brothers and sisters in law showed their true colors and we now have as little as possible to do with them. I only wrote the post to warn some of these early retirees that family obligations can sometimes pop up and negatively impact the best thought out plans.
Tracker968
Posts: 369
Joined: Tue Feb 23, 2016 8:32 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Tracker968 »

I didn't read all 4 pushes of replies, but I wish I had known that Medicare isn't all that great or all that cheap. I have a pension and am working part time. That puts me over the irmaa threshold. Now that my wife is on Medicare also, we have to pay two irmaa amounts, plus two part D Irmaas. I have original Medicare with a supplement plan and the cheapest part D plan available. My monthly medical premium cost is only about $200 less than the private insurance I was on prior to age 65. And I have no dental or vision coverage.
AnEngineer
Posts: 2407
Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2020 4:05 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by AnEngineer »

Tracker968 wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 10:44 pm I didn't read all 4 pushes of replies, but I wish I had known that Medicare isn't all that great or all that cheap. I have a pension and am working part time. That puts me over the irmaa threshold. Now that my wife is on Medicare also, we have to pay two irmaa amounts, plus two part D Irmaas. I have original Medicare with a supplement plan and the cheapest part D plan available. My monthly medical premium cost is only about $200 less than the private insurance I was on prior to age 65. And I have no dental or vision coverage.
Did you buy your previous insurance yourself, or was it through an employer, and in either case was it subsidized? Either ACA or as a typical employer plan is.
vested1
Posts: 3492
Joined: Wed Jan 04, 2012 3:20 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by vested1 »

Tracker968 wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 10:44 pm I didn't read all 4 pushes of replies, but I wish I had known that Medicare isn't all that great or all that cheap. I have a pension and am working part time. That puts me over the irmaa threshold. Now that my wife is on Medicare also, we have to pay two irmaa amounts, plus two part D Irmaas. I have original Medicare with a supplement plan and the cheapest part D plan available. My monthly medical premium cost is only about $200 less than the private insurance I was on prior to age 65. And I have no dental or vision coverage.
It's a shock to the system when entering Medicare to realize that a couple is no longer considered a "family". No more family deductibles, no more simple decisions, but more of a tacit desire to separate rather than to unite. Medicare treats every person as an individual to save the system money I suppose, or perhaps to prepare us for death, when separation becomes permanent.

Costs skyrocket once the inevitable illnesses occur, and the fact that two in the family may need extra care or specialty drugs is not considered, only an illogical conclusion that because you were diligent in saving that you must be able to afford higher costs for everything. Add to that the loss of dental and vision coverage, or if purchased, basically worthless at a time when you need it the most.

All that being said, retirement is soooo much better than I expected.
Cracker
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Aug 20, 2019 7:33 pm
Location: Georgia, USA

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Cracker »

I'm 4 1/2 years in and so far, taxes and health care have not taken as big a bite as I thought they would.
Zhen
Posts: 56
Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2008 10:11 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Zhen »

I have not retired, but have spent quite some time researching and planning my retirement in the past few years. Eventually, I conclude four pillars of happy retirement are wealth, health, relationship, and purpose.
  • Wealth => being financial secure
  • Health => mental and physical wellness
  • Relationship => social connection with a robust network of family and friends
  • Purpose => having a reason to get out of bed in the morning or to live when you have a rough time
One observation is, I believe wealth is the least problem for most of Bogleheads, but somehow it is the most discussed topic in this thread.
StartedAt22
Posts: 112
Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2021 9:26 pm
Location: Over Yonder

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by StartedAt22 »

Zhen wrote: Mon Jun 06, 2022 1:26 pm I have not retired, but have spent quite some time researching and planning my retirement in the past few years. Eventually, I conclude four pillars of happy retirement are wealth, health, relationship, and purpose.
  • Wealth => being financial secure
  • Health => mental and physical wellness
  • Relationship => social connection with a robust network of family and friends
  • Purpose => having a reason to get out of bed in the morning or to live when you have a rough time
One observation is, I believe wealth is the least problem for most of Bogleheads, but somehow it is the most discussed topic in this thread.
I think that is likely because the other items are highly personalized. Even finance is a highly personal subject, challenging our individual values.
A task begun is nearly half complete | Enough is as good as a feast | Risk: Ensure your goals can be met even under worst case scenario and be realistic.
mtmingus
Posts: 679
Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 3:15 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by mtmingus »

vested1 wrote: Mon Jun 06, 2022 6:22 am
Costs skyrocket once the inevitable illnesses occur, and the fact that two in the family may need extra care or specialty drugs is not considered, only an illogical conclusion that because you were diligent in saving that you must be able to afford higher costs for everything. Add to that the loss of dental and vision coverage, or if purchased, basically worthless at a time when you need it the most.
That’s depressing!
Topic Author
Hugh Prolly-Wright
Posts: 67
Joined: Thu Sep 15, 2016 8:10 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Hugh Prolly-Wright »

Zhen wrote: Mon Jun 06, 2022 1:26 pm I have not retired, but have spent quite some time researching and planning my retirement in the past few years. Eventually, I conclude four pillars of happy retirement are wealth, health, relationship, and purpose.
  • Wealth => being financial secure
  • Health => mental and physical wellness
  • Relationship => social connection with a robust network of family and friends
  • Purpose => having a reason to get out of bed in the morning or to live when you have a rough time
One observation is, I believe wealth is the least problem for most of Bogleheads, but somehow it is the most discussed topic in this thread.
I think you're right. We're on the cusp of retirement, and by all the usual measures, have saved enough. Yet I still run the numbers a lot to assess where we are. I have many projects and things I'd like to spend time on in retirement, so I don't think purpose will be a problem. At present, it's the job that's getting in the way.
Naismith
Posts: 530
Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2014 2:58 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Naismith »

summerof42 wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 6:25 am I've never understood that belief. Exactly what expenses “go away onceI stop working,”. To me, the expenses are the same or higher when taking into account you lose your great health benefits at work (health, dental, vision, etc) and Medicare and a Supplemental Plan, plus Rx plan cost more. Not to mention the cost of Rx are typically higher. You still eat the same amount of food, you still pay for all the same utilities, drive around. . . So what expenses “go away?” I only see higher expenses go away if you’ve paid off your mortgage, which most of us are not so fortunate, or you move into a smaller home.

Please enlighten me.
I do not eat the same food. I eat more healthy, for less money, because I have more time to shop and cook. When I was employed fulltime with kids at home, it was race into the house and slap something edible on the table in 30 minutes. When a daughter was here at Christmas, she was amazed to enjoy the mustard cream sauce over a pork chop and rice mixture. I didn't cook like that when she was growing up.

I do not drive around as much. I have the luxury of time to plan trips, bunching errands together on an off-peak day. If something is less than 4 miles away and it is not raining, I will go by bicycle.

We have the time to check health insurance statements (always find at least one significant error each year), shop for new quotes on car insurance, consider credit card rewards, plan trips, etc. For our journeys, we can save money travelling at off-peak times and are no longer limited to a 2-week window.

Nowadays we do our own cleaning and yardwork, garden some food.

Obviously, not everyone is inclined to turn their extra time into cost savings, but for us it has really made a difference.
SeasOfCheese
Posts: 139
Joined: Wed Jan 20, 2021 7:40 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by SeasOfCheese »

Harry Livermore wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 7:49 am I find it odd when couples who are finally free (or on the cusp of being free) of ongoing obligations (work, minor or adult children, mortgages) willingly sign up for another 10 or 15 stint as "pet parents". I'm not disparaging pet ownership. It's wonderful and can be an excellent aid in mental health for many.
And I get it, you can board the pets and go. But I think it would be part of the welcome change of life to be truly free for a few years (folks that age are often soon-to-be grandparents, or soon-to-be caretakers of their own parents)
I'd think about a new pet AFTER a few years of freedom, to see if you really miss having a pet.
Anyway, I hope I did not insult anyone. Personal choices. Just like personal finance.
:sharebeer
Cheers
As the saying goes... life begins when the kids move out and the dog dies. :happy
LXEX55
Posts: 93
Joined: Fri Feb 12, 2016 8:12 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by LXEX55 »

how expensive healthcare is if you retire before Medicare age. COBRA cost me a fortune.
MathWizard
Posts: 6542
Joined: Tue Jul 26, 2011 1:35 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by MathWizard »

Wanderingwheelz wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:47 am This may sound off putting to some, but I wish my folks had told me that my inheritance is likely to be triple my best guess and enough to double my best egg which is already large enough to retire- which I am.

We did our estate planning last year and I suspect that prompted them to better inform me what their snapshot looks like, but I’m not sure.

Regardless, I wish I’d known earlier since it has had an effect on how I view my own asset allocation, and it also has me thinking about my real estate situation.
We would not be able to tell our kids how much they will inherit.
So much depends on the market.

Though we are very unlikely to run out of money, the terminal value
depends on the market, the sequence of returns, and how long we live, all of which are unknown. The terminal value of our portfolio has a small bit non-zero chance of being zero, but could be over $4 million.

We just tell the kids that we won't need money , but may need non-financial assistance as we age. We modeled that behavior with our parents when they needed help
flyingaway
Posts: 3908
Joined: Fri Jan 17, 2014 9:19 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by flyingaway »

Zhen wrote: Mon Jun 06, 2022 1:26 pm I have not retired, but have spent quite some time researching and planning my retirement in the past few years. Eventually, I conclude four pillars of happy retirement are wealth, health, relationship, and purpose.
  • Wealth => being financial secure
  • Health => mental and physical wellness
  • Relationship => social connection with a robust network of family and friends
  • Purpose => having a reason to get out of bed in the morning or to live when you have a rough time (Keep working.)
One observation is, I believe wealth is the least problem for most of Bogleheads, but somehow it is the most discussed topic in this thread.
User avatar
InvestorHowie
Posts: 394
Joined: Sun Jul 20, 2008 1:01 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by InvestorHowie »

Unless I missed it up the thread I'm somewhat surprised I haven't seen anyone mentioning 'saving enough in cash+taxable for Roth conversion opportunities'. We're somewhere between 6-10 years out and have only about a year in expenses saved between cash and taxable and I feel like that's where we're most behind. We have some Roth and HSA but tax-deferred is still about 90% of our portfolio. I feel that we'll want (need?) to have at least 5 years of expenses saved in that bucket to bridge the gap during the prime Roth conversion years. What are others' experiences here on the other side of retirement?
Time is your friend; impulse is your enemy. --John C. Bogle
User avatar
billthecat
Posts: 1052
Joined: Tue Jan 24, 2017 1:50 pm
Location: USA

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by billthecat »

LXEX55 wrote: Wed Dec 07, 2022 3:56 pm how expensive healthcare is if you retire before Medicare age. COBRA cost me a fortune.
For anyone else who may be wondering, you can know what COBRA will cost you in advance.

Box 12, code DD of your W2 is the "full employee cost + full employer cost" - take that number, multiply it by 1.02, divide by 12 to get your monthly COBRA premium.

Most likely, ACA costs less.
We cannot direct the winds but we can adjust our sails • It's later than you think • Ack! Thbbft!
sailaway
Posts: 8188
Joined: Fri May 12, 2017 1:11 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by sailaway »

MathWizard wrote: Wed Dec 07, 2022 5:49 pm
Wanderingwheelz wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:47 am This may sound off putting to some, but I wish my folks had told me that my inheritance is likely to be triple my best guess and enough to double my best egg which is already large enough to retire- which I am.

We did our estate planning last year and I suspect that prompted them to better inform me what their snapshot looks like, but I’m not sure.

Regardless, I wish I’d known earlier since it has had an effect on how I view my own asset allocation, and it also has me thinking about my real estate situation.
We would not be able to tell our kids how much they will inherit.
So much depends on the market.

Though we are very unlikely to run out of money, the terminal value
depends on the market, the sequence of returns, and how long we live, all of which are unknown. The terminal value of our portfolio has a small bit non-zero chance of being zero, but could be over $4 million.

We just tell the kids that we won't need money , but may need non-financial assistance as we age. We modeled that behavior with our parents when they needed help
Although both my parents and in laws are currently adamant that splitting between their children is the only logical and fair way to do things, I fully expect them to realize at some point that the money would make a bigger difference for the grandchildren. Or maybe long term care will happen. Or...

jebmke wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 12:46 pm
GAAP wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 12:29 pm It is possible for a new post-retirement interest to completely change how actual retirement goes vs. your original plans.
The things we thought we would be doing in retirement are not the things we ended up doing -- for various reasons. I always caution people to not get fixated on specifics but (a) remain flexible and (b) think more in general terms about what are the characteristics of those activities that appeals to you so you can identify other activities that fulfill that if/when things change for you.
We started planning for a long sabbatical, then early retirement when DH was about 30. Just as we reached FI, he developed a health issue that makes it unlikely we will ever do the things we had planned. But we sure are glad that we have all the options we do!
lgerla
Posts: 119
Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2017 9:07 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by lgerla »

Here are some pre-retirement/spouse retirement things I wish I’d known, because I would have put off moving immediately upon my spouse’s retirement. I would have planned to keep our home in our previous HCOL area for a year just to minimize overall disruption. But this is also called LIFE. If you’ve made it this far, you will know such things are impossible to predict.
  • That my father would die the day the truck was loading our belongings for our post-retirement move (well understood there was no inheritance, but a huge personal loss that affects me to this day) …
  • That my husband would be diagnosed with cancer within 6 months of his retirement. His treatment was excruciating but thankfully successful, and I was a working caregiver in a new town with no friends or family …
  • That my oldest son would move to NYC, work in the hospitality industry, get laid off the Sunday before St. Patrick’s Day 2020, immediately apply for unemployment, and wait 4 months for benefits …
  • That I would not have retired yet at age 61. I wanted to retire before I was 60!
On the other hand, we sold our home at a decent price in 2018 and bought at a decent price in 2019. Through all of this, our GREXIT plan (last name plus Exit) I put together in 2017 to show my husband he could retire, has worked. It included 4 years of laddered CDs to use for income before he claimed SS this year at age 70. We have travelled, bought a boat, and enjoyed our new home and time together. The biggest adjustment for DH has been the loss of purpose (work); mine has been the move far from my family.

I’m still working on my own Exit plan (as yet unnamed). I will be 62 in May 2023, so June 2023 is my target retirement date. This year, I moved all but $100k of my company retirement funds to my solo 401(k), adding to my main funds for my true retirement. The amount left in my employment account (plus current contributions) is mentally set aside for my first two years of retirement + contingencies. These funds are invested, but not included in my planned long-term retirement income.

Our adult children are stabilizing and we’ve learned to say, “Gee, I’m sorry to hear that…” instead of offering to help. Somehow, I am sure this is the biggest impediment to my retirement.
User avatar
Sandtrap
Posts: 19582
Joined: Sat Nov 26, 2016 5:32 pm
Location: Hawaii No Ka Oi - white sandy beaches, N. Arizona 1 mile high.

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Sandtrap »

Hugh Prolly-Wright wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 7:08 am For those of you retired, what is something you wish you had known prior to retirement? Something you found out or discovered only after retiring?
I"m not thinking of financial matters only,(though that's a big part) but other aspects of the retired life, too.
RE: Financials
Financial "coulda', shoulda', didn't". (shucks!)
10 years ago.
Didn't buy three 12 unit apartment buildings in the hot Scottsdale/Tempe corridor at 8-900k each. No worth 2.5 times that.
Didn't buy townhouse units in a hot well established area for 90-120k each. Now worth 2.5 times that and 3x the rent.
Didn't buy a 31 unit apartment complex. Now worth 2.5 times that and 2.5x the rent.
(dis laimer: only in my case as a retired businessman)

Personal RE: medical insurance, etc.
FIRE means pre medicare and the ACA Penalty Cliff and ACA very compromised medical coverage, system, etc, can make healthcare needs terribly expensive. On top of high premiums, if one's health goes south, Medical insurance and out of pocket costs, can be a nightmare until Medicare Traditional, etc.
(dis laimer: for some folks, things are great, for others, not so great)

Unforseen medical and health "black swans" can tear up one's assets no matter if one has 25X or 50X, etc.

RE: social net in retirement
Social spheres in retirement can be highly over-rated depending on how one is "wired".

RE: Estate planning:
Estate planning can take a long time. And, finding very highly qualified legal counsel to do trust planning, etc, for a complex estate can be very difficult. Also, there are a lot of incompetent to marginally qualified legal counsel that do estate planning, etc.

Personal Summary
1
We "retired" and made a huge location and life paradigm shift, at just the right time, and did things in near perfect order and timing, etc. Much like a business plan, it's a certain % planning and logistics, and more than a certain % instinct (doesn't fit on a spreadsheet).
DW and I had a 30+ year plan, and a "vision".

2
Having a bit, "more than enough" financially in retirement, living in the right place with peace and tranquility, and establishing a lifestyle symbiotic with one's "self", is priceless.

j :D
Wiki Bogleheads Wiki: Everything You Need to Know
Cubs Fan
Posts: 150
Joined: Wed Nov 11, 2020 11:22 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Cubs Fan »

I found out that my friends are getting younger. At first my associates and I were the same age. After a while they were five years younger. I am currently age 79, and I am usually the oldest one there!
wait until next year!
Fogbank
Posts: 88
Joined: Wed Jan 29, 2020 7:06 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Fogbank »

Normchad wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 9:10 pm
I think the “judgmental people” are real. It’s a real concern for me. I won’t be telling friends and family when I retire. I’m going with “I’ve lost my job. I’m in between jobs right now”. It sucks, but it is what it is.
We have > 25x expenses now but are going to keep going for awhile, mainly because we're still in our 40s and want to build up the war chest some more. So I have thought about this a lot, unfortunately. I know that if I told certain family members (on both sides) that "we're retired" they wouldn't understand and it would materially affect our relationships.

I'm a software architect so I'm going with, "I've decided to do contract work & consulting for awhile". We haven't figured out what DW will say yet.
Parkinglotracer
Posts: 3920
Joined: Fri Dec 20, 2019 2:49 am
Location: Upstate NY

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Parkinglotracer »

CyclingDuo wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 9:37 am
Cruise wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 1:29 am Surprise things learned on retirement:

1. When I retired I met a number of people who seemed less-then-happy to learn I was retired. Really weird jealousy vibes.

2. It is possible to have more take-home income when retired than working. At least that is the case with my wife: Her pension take home exceeds her work take home because she is no longer getting payroll deductions for parking, healthcare, state income tax, Medicare and FICA, and three retirement plans.

3. One’s spouse may not retire on the timeline one expects.
These are all discussions that interest us.

1. I am still working and am always dumbfounded by some of the opposite. I work with clients/customers and even though over the past three years I was 58, 59, and now 60, occasionally some of the clients would ask me "Why are you still working?" with a tone in their voice that is similar to what you mention. Maybe I am taking it wrong, but just mentioning I find it odd to be asked that question and the tone used.

2. I used to have some mild concerns about this (at least in terms of taxes and it being a problem). Due to delaying SS, having a pension, the size of our nest egg, and both working into our 60's - we will most likely find ourselves in the more take-home income during retirement than our working years scenario. Of course, things could change, but at least with our current plan the potential is there - especially once SS and RMD's all kick in down the road a bit. Gives us some option B's such as me being able to call an audible when my wife retires next year as to my employment status, or the option to move to a higher cost of living area, etc... .

3. Spouse retires next year at 65 1/2. That leaves me as the wildcard for a retirement timeline since I am 4 years younger. We have discussed expected timelines, and part of that discussion includes staggering our retirements to avoid too much of a shock being together 24/7 - at least during the first year. I still enjoy working and don't really want to pull the plug quite yet, so the ongoing discussion will continue as she wants to up and move to a different area of the country. That sets up the scenario of one of us upsetting the other person's timeline and expectations (although I could get a job transfer that I am starting to look into...).

Anyway, would be interested to hear what others have gone through regarding the three points you listed and how it all is working out. I am probably more interested in point 3. Any advice on staggering retirement dates for the adjustment?

CyclingDuo
I have retired twice - once at age 50 for three years and last at age 60 for three years. My wife and I enjoy spending time together, traveling together, spending a few months away seasonally together. The second time I retired - she did too and that enabled us to snow bird and do more stuff together … while it is important for each person to have their own interests both of us being free from work at the same time made retirement the second time much more enjoyable for me. I should ask her - ha ha.

Both of us being free works for us now. We have had dogs for 35 years too - not having a pets in retirement now works better for us too. Maybe we will again someday.
User avatar
CyclingDuo
Posts: 5989
Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2017 8:07 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by CyclingDuo »

Parkinglotracer wrote: Tue Jun 06, 2023 7:28 am
CyclingDuo wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 9:37 am
Cruise wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 1:29 am Surprise things learned on retirement:

1. When I retired I met a number of people who seemed less-then-happy to learn I was retired. Really weird jealousy vibes.

2. It is possible to have more take-home income when retired than working. At least that is the case with my wife: Her pension take home exceeds her work take home because she is no longer getting payroll deductions for parking, healthcare, state income tax, Medicare and FICA, and three retirement plans.

3. One’s spouse may not retire on the timeline one expects.
These are all discussions that interest us.

1. I am still working and am always dumbfounded by some of the opposite. I work with clients/customers and even though over the past three years I was 58, 59, and now 60, occasionally some of the clients would ask me "Why are you still working?" with a tone in their voice that is similar to what you mention. Maybe I am taking it wrong, but just mentioning I find it odd to be asked that question and the tone used.

2. I used to have some mild concerns about this (at least in terms of taxes and it being a problem). Due to delaying SS, having a pension, the size of our nest egg, and both working into our 60's - we will most likely find ourselves in the more take-home income during retirement than our working years scenario. Of course, things could change, but at least with our current plan the potential is there - especially once SS and RMD's all kick in down the road a bit. Gives us some option B's such as me being able to call an audible when my wife retires next year as to my employment status, or the option to move to a higher cost of living area, etc... .

3. Spouse retires next year at 65 1/2. That leaves me as the wildcard for a retirement timeline since I am 4 years younger. We have discussed expected timelines, and part of that discussion includes staggering our retirements to avoid too much of a shock being together 24/7 - at least during the first year. I still enjoy working and don't really want to pull the plug quite yet, so the ongoing discussion will continue as she wants to up and move to a different area of the country. That sets up the scenario of one of us upsetting the other person's timeline and expectations (although I could get a job transfer that I am starting to look into...).

Anyway, would be interested to hear what others have gone through regarding the three points you listed and how it all is working out. I am probably more interested in point 3. Any advice on staggering retirement dates for the adjustment?

CyclingDuo
I have retired twice - once at age 50 for three years and last at age 60 for three years. My wife and I enjoy spending time together, traveling together, spending a few months away seasonally together. The second time I retired - she did too and that enabled us to snow bird and do more stuff together … while it is important for each person to have their own interests both of us being free from work at the same time made retirement the second time much more enjoyable for me. I should ask her - ha ha.

Both of us being free works for us now. We have had dogs for 35 years too - not having a pets in retirement now works better for us too. Maybe we will again someday.
Congrats on your 2nd retirement! Sounds like you are enjoying it this time around.

Due to our household's careers revolving around the academic calendar year and the performance calendar of opera houses (September - June), we always had summers off together where we enjoyed mini retirements each and every summer for 2-3 months for the first 35 years of our being together. We learned more about how that would look in our actual retirement once the empty nest years began.

Update from the post you are responding to: My wife is now a few days into her retirement compared to my previous post last year in anticipation of her retirement coming this year. My audible call at the moment remains to keep working as we go through this transition of staggered retirements. Our original plans from the post I made last year to move to a higher cost of living area fizzled out after we spent time last summer in the chosen area exploring, viewing houses, checking on shopping/recreation in the area which left my wife coming to the realization she likes where we are currently living. C'est la vie. I'm sure there will be future discussions...

I like your idea of snow-birding. Do you go to the same location, or are you planning on returning to the same location each Winter?

CyclingDuo
"Save like a pessimist, invest like an optimist." - Morgan Housel | "Pick a bushel, save a peck!" - Grandpa
bltn
Posts: 1843
Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2017 8:32 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by bltn »

Wanderingwheelz wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 1:27 pm
HMSVictory wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 12:23 pm
Wanderingwheelz wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:47 am This may sound off putting to some, but I wish my folks had told me that my inheritance is likely to be triple my best guess and enough to double my best egg which is already large enough to retire- which I am.

We did our estate planning last year and I suspect that prompted them to better inform me what their snapshot looks like, but I’m not sure.

Regardless, I wish I’d known earlier since it has had an effect on how I view my own asset allocation, and it also has me thinking about my real estate situation.
Easy fix - give it all away to charity! Problem solved (and you get a tax deduction as well)! :shock:
Easy cowboy. I’m only 50.
I was about your age when I found out the value of my parents estate. I also was surprised at the size of the investment accounts. It didn t change my plans for continued work and savings. When I inherited from my parents about 10 years later on the death of my mother, I simply kept a testamentary trust intact, to be passed on to the kids, free of estate taxes. My father retired in his mid 70 s and I retired in my mid 60 s. No one in our family has considered retiring at a young age except in circumstances of hardship. Of course we ve been blessed with jobs that we generally like.

I wonder if counting on an inheritance years before it materializes is a good idea for most people. Somehow, I doubt it.
Last edited by bltn on Tue Jun 06, 2023 8:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.
bltn
Posts: 1843
Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2017 8:32 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by bltn »

celia wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 4:22 pm It took me a couple of years to realize WHY our income taxes and tax bracket went up. It basically was because we couldn’t itemize anymore and our dependents were gone. Our mortgage was paid off, we stopped saving for retirement, and had to take RMDs from an Inherited IRA, all around the same time.

So our “Taxable Income” grew while our expenses went down.
That was a good problem to have.

While living fairly comfortably before retirement, after looking at the numbers, I realized that a withdrawal of about 150% of our expenses would be conservative. Did that mean we might have retired 7-8 years earlier? Maybe, but having the increased income was also nice. Very nice.
JediMisty
Posts: 914
Joined: Tue Aug 07, 2018 7:06 am
Location: Georgia

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by JediMisty »

TheTimeLord wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 9:33 am I will repeat the one I have mentioned several times but seems to be unique to me based on feedback here. I never realized how much my plans would be impacted by the finances of friends and family. Other people budgets seem to control more things than my budget. Never saw that coming.
That's true for me, too. Also people I've dated are not retired, yet. Health issues plaque most folks my age. I travel alone a lot, which can get lonely. Also pay my sister's way when we're together.
Wanderingwheelz
Posts: 3125
Joined: Mon Mar 04, 2019 8:52 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Wanderingwheelz »

bltn wrote: Tue Jun 06, 2023 8:22 pm
Wanderingwheelz wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 1:27 pm
HMSVictory wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 12:23 pm
Wanderingwheelz wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 11:47 am This may sound off putting to some, but I wish my folks had told me that my inheritance is likely to be triple my best guess and enough to double my best egg which is already large enough to retire- which I am.

We did our estate planning last year and I suspect that prompted them to better inform me what their snapshot looks like, but I’m not sure.

Regardless, I wish I’d known earlier since it has had an effect on how I view my own asset allocation, and it also has me thinking about my real estate situation.
Easy fix - give it all away to charity! Problem solved (and you get a tax deduction as well)! :shock:
Easy cowboy. I’m only 50.
I was about your age when I found out the value of my parents estate. I also was surprised at the size of the investment accounts. It didn t change my plans for continued work and savings. When I inherited from my parents about 10 years later on the death of my mother, I simply kept a testamentary trust intact, to be passed on to the kids, free of estate taxes. My father retired in his mid 70 s and I retired in my mid 60 s. No one in our family has considered retiring at a young age except in circumstances of hardship. Of course we ve been blessed with jobs that we generally like.

I wonder if counting on an inheritance years before it materializes is a good idea for most people. Somehow, I doubt it.
We’re you under the impression I quit working because of a future windfall? I hope not.

I don’t know exactly what our retirement spending will look like (current household earned income is plenty to keep our powder dry), but right now we’re at about 70x our 2022 expenses- and that values a really good business at zero.

Anyway glad you kept working. Sounds like it was the right choice for yourself.
Being wrong compounds forever.
olefoodie
Posts: 36
Joined: Sun Dec 12, 2021 1:45 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by olefoodie »

Here's something I don't think has been mentioned yet. I retired in my mid 40s and was shocked that I had to switch ALL my drs once I enrolled into an ACA plan. In NYC, the ACA plans tend to have a huge network of drs to choose from, given the volume of drs that work in the city in general, but in terms of highly-rated drs...they avoid ACA like the plague. I had to give up my highly-rated, highly-popular drs to settle for drs willing to take ACA. What a sobering consequence of retiring early that I will have to live with for 20 years until I'm eligible for Medicare (or until I move out of NYC, which is unlikely). You're kinda handcuffed to the networks the ACA plans have and NYC just happens to have few options for great drs in all their ACA plans (I checked them all - the majority of PCPs in their networks have no ratings or poor ratings). Quite commonly, the few PCPs in the networks who are highly-rated no longer accept new patients from these plans. I'm envious of those of you who live elsewhere who have better options.
Parkinglotracer
Posts: 3920
Joined: Fri Dec 20, 2019 2:49 am
Location: Upstate NY

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Parkinglotracer »

CyclingDuo wrote: Tue Jun 06, 2023 8:09 am
Parkinglotracer wrote: Tue Jun 06, 2023 7:28 am
CyclingDuo wrote: Sun Jun 05, 2022 9:37 am
Cruise wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 1:29 am Surprise things learned on retirement:

1. When I retired I met a number of people who seemed less-then-happy to learn I was retired. Really weird jealousy vibes.

2. It is possible to have more take-home income when retired than working. At least that is the case with my wife: Her pension take home exceeds her work take home because she is no longer getting payroll deductions for parking, healthcare, state income tax, Medicare and FICA, and three retirement plans.

3. One’s spouse may not retire on the timeline one expects.
These are all discussions that interest us.

1. I am still working and am always dumbfounded by some of the opposite. I work with clients/customers and even though over the past three years I was 58, 59, and now 60, occasionally some of the clients would ask me "Why are you still working?" with a tone in their voice that is similar to what you mention. Maybe I am taking it wrong, but just mentioning I find it odd to be asked that question and the tone used.

2. I used to have some mild concerns about this (at least in terms of taxes and it being a problem). Due to delaying SS, having a pension, the size of our nest egg, and both working into our 60's - we will most likely find ourselves in the more take-home income during retirement than our working years scenario. Of course, things could change, but at least with our current plan the potential is there - especially once SS and RMD's all kick in down the road a bit. Gives us some option B's such as me being able to call an audible when my wife retires next year as to my employment status, or the option to move to a higher cost of living area, etc... .

3. Spouse retires next year at 65 1/2. That leaves me as the wildcard for a retirement timeline since I am 4 years younger. We have discussed expected timelines, and part of that discussion includes staggering our retirements to avoid too much of a shock being together 24/7 - at least during the first year. I still enjoy working and don't really want to pull the plug quite yet, so the ongoing discussion will continue as she wants to up and move to a different area of the country. That sets up the scenario of one of us upsetting the other person's timeline and expectations (although I could get a job transfer that I am starting to look into...).

Anyway, would be interested to hear what others have gone through regarding the three points you listed and how it all is working out. I am probably more interested in point 3. Any advice on staggering retirement dates for the adjustment?

CyclingDuo
I have retired twice - once at age 50 for three years and last at age 60 for three years. My wife and I enjoy spending time together, traveling together, spending a few months away seasonally together. The second time I retired - she did too and that enabled us to snow bird and do more stuff together … while it is important for each person to have their own interests both of us being free from work at the same time made retirement the second time much more enjoyable for me. I should ask her - ha ha.

Both of us being free works for us now. We have had dogs for 35 years too - not having a pets in retirement now works better for us too. Maybe we will again someday.
Congrats on your 2nd retirement! Sounds like you are enjoying it this time around.

Due to our household's careers revolving around the academic calendar year and the performance calendar of opera houses (September - June), we always had summers off together where we enjoyed mini retirements each and every summer for 2-3 months for the first 35 years of our being together. We learned more about how that would look in our actual retirement once the empty nest years began.

Update from the post you are responding to: My wife is now a few days into her retirement compared to my previous post last year in anticipation of her retirement coming this year. My audible call at the moment remains to keep working as we go through this transition of staggered retirements. Our original plans from the post I made last year to move to a higher cost of living area fizzled out after we spent time last summer in the chosen area exploring, viewing houses, checking on shopping/recreation in the area which left my wife coming to the realization she likes where we are currently living. C'est la vie. I'm sure there will be future discussions...

I like your idea of snow-birding. Do you go to the same location, or are you planning on returning to the same location each Winter?

CyclingDuo

If you like your job and it works for you guys - I’d keep working -we can all agree a paycheck is nice. It’s no doubt what I miss most about work but miss the people and an occasional accomplishment too.

We both went to high school in st Pete Clearwater area of Florida and have family and friends there so we snowbird there. We know buying a second home is not for everyone. It is nice to escape upstate ny’s long winters and we miss our friends there the 4 months we head south each year.
Old Guy
Posts: 660
Joined: Mon Mar 19, 2012 7:20 am
Location: On the beach in SC. Hilton Head Island.

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Old Guy »

How much money we would have in retirement. More than when we were working.

The variety of medical issues my wife would face in her middle 70s.
8301
Posts: 942
Joined: Thu Dec 22, 2022 1:52 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by 8301 »

Cruise wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 1:29 am Surprise things learned on retirement:

1. When I retired I met a number of people who seemed less-then-happy to learn I was retired. Really weird jealousy vibes.
Sorry, it is not out of jealousy. I avoid spending time with retirees unless they have led successful lives. Why should I waste my time? They belong to the past.
8301
Posts: 942
Joined: Thu Dec 22, 2022 1:52 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by 8301 »

olefoodie wrote: Tue Jun 06, 2023 11:01 pm Here's something I don't think has been mentioned yet. I retired in my mid 40s and was shocked that I had to switch ALL my drs once I enrolled into an ACA plan. In NYC, the ACA plans tend to have a huge network of drs to choose from, given the volume of drs that work in the city in general, but in terms of highly-rated drs...they avoid ACA like the plague. I had to give up my highly-rated, highly-popular drs to settle for drs willing to take ACA. What a sobering consequence of retiring early that I will have to live with for 20 years until I'm eligible for Medicare (or until I move out of NYC, which is unlikely). You're kinda handcuffed to the networks the ACA plans have and NYC just happens to have few options for great drs in all their ACA plans (I checked them all - the majority of PCPs in their networks have no ratings or poor ratings). Quite commonly, the few PCPs in the networks who are highly-rated no longer accept new patients from these plans. I'm envious of those of you who live elsewhere who have better options.
If retire in your 40s, you must have tons of money in the bank. Why don't you forego ACA and pay everything out of pocket?
ROIGuy
Posts: 2444
Joined: Sun May 08, 2016 10:10 am

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by ROIGuy »

billthecat wrote: Wed Dec 07, 2022 6:35 pm
LXEX55 wrote: Wed Dec 07, 2022 3:56 pm how expensive healthcare is if you retire before Medicare age. COBRA cost me a fortune.
For anyone else who may be wondering, you can know what COBRA will cost you in advance.

Box 12, code DD of your W2 is the "full employee cost + full employer cost" - take that number, multiply it by 1.02, divide by 12 to get your monthly COBRA premium.

Most likely, ACA costs less.
Thanks for that info!
User avatar
Supergrover
Posts: 482
Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2021 2:15 pm
Location: PHL / NJ

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Supergrover »

8301 wrote: Sat Jun 10, 2023 7:47 am
Cruise wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 1:29 am Surprise things learned on retirement:

1. When I retired I met a number of people who seemed less-then-happy to learn I was retired. Really weird jealousy vibes.
Sorry, it is not out of jealousy. I avoid spending time with retirees unless they have led successful lives. Why should I waste my time? They belong to the past.
Are you joking?
wm631
Posts: 193
Joined: Sat Jul 14, 2012 5:37 pm

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by wm631 »

Hugh Prolly-Wright wrote: Thu Jun 02, 2022 7:08 am For those of you retired, what is something you wish you had known prior to retirement? Something you found out or discovered only after retiring?
I"m not thinking of financial matters only,(though that's a big part) but other aspects of the retired life, too.
Well ... Retired, by choice, at 60.5 yrs. in early 2015. It wouldn't have changed my decision, but .... I kinda wished I'd known ahead of time about the COVID-Progressive Years that were coming, starting in the spring of 2020. :shock:
Parkinglotracer
Posts: 3920
Joined: Fri Dec 20, 2019 2:49 am
Location: Upstate NY

Re: Re Retirement "I wish I'd known..."

Post by Parkinglotracer »

8301 wrote: Sat Jun 10, 2023 7:47 am
Cruise wrote: Sat Jun 04, 2022 1:29 am Surprise things learned on retirement:

1. When I retired I met a number of people who seemed less-then-happy to learn I was retired. Really weird jealousy vibes.
Sorry, it is not out of jealousy. I avoid spending time with retirees unless they have led successful lives. Why should I waste my time? They belong to the past.
My initial impression is I would not want to meet you in retirement. My initial impression is not always right. I hope my initial impression is wrong.
Post Reply