$40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

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TSR
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by TSR » Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:39 pm

Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:23 pm
FoolMeOnce wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:17 pm
It's pretty funny that someone thinks people all over the country are buying, and people on this site are recommending, a security system that doesn't do anything.
I have no idea what you are talking about. The system absolutely works. Period.

I was responding to a poster's complaint about the system for which I pointed them to the source of the problem which they could have easily found for themselves.

Cheers
I don't want to speak for him/her, but I think that's what FoolMeOnce is saying -- it's odd that the one poster who complained about the product thinks everyone here is hyping a product that doesn't work. In other words, I think you're both in agreement here.

Silk McCue
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by Silk McCue » Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:43 pm

TSR wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:39 pm
I don't want to speak for him/her, but I think that's what FoolMeOnce is saying -- it's odd that the one poster who complained about the product thinks everyone here is hyping a product that doesn't work. In other words, I think you're both in agreement here.
Ugh! You are correct. I either need more or less caffeine. I think I will go with chocolate instead.

Cheers

Silk McCue
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by Silk McCue » Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:46 pm

Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:23 pm
FoolMeOnce wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:17 pm
It's pretty funny that someone thinks people all over the country are buying, and people on this site are recommending, a security system that doesn't do anything.
Edited
I deleted my original response as I misread the intent of FoolMeOnce by 180°.

Oh well.

Cheers

FoolMeOnce
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by FoolMeOnce » Fri Jan 11, 2019 3:13 pm

Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:46 pm
Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:23 pm
FoolMeOnce wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:17 pm
It's pretty funny that someone thinks people all over the country are buying, and people on this site are recommending, a security system that doesn't do anything.
Edited
I deleted my original response as I misread the intent of FoolMeOnce by 180°.

Oh well.

Cheers
:sharebeer

jayk238
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by jayk238 » Fri Jan 11, 2019 3:25 pm

Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 12:32 pm
jayk238 wrote:
Thu Jan 10, 2019 9:00 pm
gclancer wrote:
Sat Jan 05, 2019 1:27 pm
geologist20 wrote:
Sat Jan 05, 2019 12:50 pm
Do you really need a security system? I have two young kids and it gives peace of mind. The services is basic
Get SimpliSafe. Upfront cost for the system, but skip the monitoring (someone breaking in will run when they hear the alarm). ROI is only a couple of months.
Simplisafe sucks. I have simplisafe. When i come home i just hit cancel and it stops. No code nothing. What a joke.
If you didn't change The Master Pin that can happen. Try Google next time or call customer support if something doesn't work the way you think it should.

Cheers
Cheers to you too. I did change the master pin. It just randomly started doing it in the last two weeks.

You mean the 20 minutes spent waiting to hear from someone? Google? I can google just fine. Cool story bro.

boglesmind
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by boglesmind » Fri Jan 11, 2019 5:14 pm

FoolMeOnce wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 3:13 pm
Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:46 pm
Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:23 pm
FoolMeOnce wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:17 pm
It's pretty funny that someone thinks people all over the country are buying, and people on this site are recommending, a security system that doesn't do anything.
Edited
I deleted my original response as I misread the intent of FoolMeOnce by 180°.

Oh well.

Cheers
:sharebeer
FoolMeOnce, I would like to hear from you directly what you meant.

Thanks
Boglesmind

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F150HD
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by F150HD » Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:23 pm

has the OP abandoned this thread?

Austintatious
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by Austintatious » Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:31 pm

geologist20,

for the past 5 months, I've been working with an individual who had racked up debt much like yours and who had reached the point of being financially and emotionally overwhelmed by it all. With regularly and frequently scheduled sessions in which I've provided input (It ain't rocket science.), disciplined oversight and lots of encouragement, this person has made marked progress, so that the finances are under control, the debt is being retired far faster than this person had thought possible, and that light at the end of the tunnel is clearly in sight, even though still at least a year away. Consider the possibility of finding a "financial coach" who is prepared to work with you and your wife over the long haul, someone who you can talk to, make plans with and be counseled by as you work your way out of that financial hole. As long as the two of you are prepared to fully commit, having such an individual ( a close friend, a family member) on hand to work closely with you over time might make a very big difference, especially at those times when your commitment to "the plan" waivers.

I've just today come across this website, so I know only what I've seen about it online. At first glance, it looks to be a well organized and thought out resource. It's the work product of a young man who dug himself out of some $80k in debt and who is using his experiences as a springboard for his venture, which I'm presuming is earning him some cash. You might find it helpful. His story about how he dug himself out from an $80k debt burden is at the second link.

https://www.moneyunder30.com/about

https://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/finance ... -under-30/

additional comment: OP, I don't recommend any loan, credit card or other commercial product that might be advertised on that site or recommended by the site owner.

FoolMeOnce
Posts: 702
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2017 11:16 am

Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by FoolMeOnce » Fri Jan 11, 2019 11:03 pm

boglesmind wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 5:14 pm
FoolMeOnce wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 3:13 pm
Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:46 pm
Silk McCue wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:23 pm
FoolMeOnce wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 2:17 pm
It's pretty funny that someone thinks people all over the country are buying, and people on this site are recommending, a security system that doesn't do anything.
Edited
I deleted my original response as I misread the intent of FoolMeOnce by 180°.

Oh well.

Cheers
:sharebeer
FoolMeOnce, I would like to hear from you directly what you meant.

Thanks
Boglesmind
I think it's funny that's jayk238 thinks that a widely recommended security system has no security, that the system is designed so that anyone can break in and just hit "cancel."

b0B
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by b0B » Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:11 pm

Any news, OP?

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whodidntante
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by whodidntante » Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:17 pm

F150HD wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:23 pm
has the OP abandoned this thread?
I don't blame him for giving up on the forum. Inexplicably, he was told to put himself, his wife, and his two kids on a "rice and beans" diet as a solution to being house poor. :happy

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F150HD
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by F150HD » Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:44 pm

whodidntante wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:17 pm
F150HD wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:23 pm
has the OP abandoned this thread?
I don't blame him for giving up on the forum. Inexplicably, he was told to put himself, his wife, and his two kids on a "rice and beans" diet as a solution to being house poor. :happy
wow, I'd forgotten about this thread, seems so long ago for some reason. Maybe they'll post up and tell us what happened.

yea, house poor is not good.

In his profile I see "Last active:Mon Jan 07, 2019 11:29 am"

Pu239
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Joined: Mon Dec 17, 2018 6:24 pm

Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by Pu239 » Sat Feb 09, 2019 9:51 pm

We gave him a broadside. Hopefully he came away with something useful.

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willthrill81
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by willthrill81 » Sat Feb 09, 2019 11:56 pm

F150HD wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:44 pm
whodidntante wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:17 pm
F150HD wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:23 pm
has the OP abandoned this thread?
I don't blame him for giving up on the forum. Inexplicably, he was told to put himself, his wife, and his two kids on a "rice and beans" diet as a solution to being house poor. :happy
wow, I'd forgotten about this thread, seems so long ago for some reason. Maybe they'll post up and tell us what happened.

yea, house poor is not good.

In his profile I see "Last active:Mon Jan 07, 2019 11:29 am"
Many who come here looking for 'advice' are actually looking for reinforcement for the decision they've already made. If they don't get it, they head for the exit.
“It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.” J.R.R. Tolkien,The Lord of the Rings

michaeljc70
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by michaeljc70 » Sun Feb 10, 2019 12:02 am

willthrill81 wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 11:56 pm
F150HD wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:44 pm
whodidntante wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 5:17 pm
F150HD wrote:
Fri Jan 11, 2019 6:23 pm
has the OP abandoned this thread?
I don't blame him for giving up on the forum. Inexplicably, he was told to put himself, his wife, and his two kids on a "rice and beans" diet as a solution to being house poor. :happy
wow, I'd forgotten about this thread, seems so long ago for some reason. Maybe they'll post up and tell us what happened.

yea, house poor is not good.

In his profile I see "Last active:Mon Jan 07, 2019 11:29 am"
Many who come here looking for 'advice' are actually looking for reinforcement for the decision they've already made. If they don't get it, they head for the exit.
True. It is nice to hear follow-up, but probably rare. Particularly on tough situations. I love the threads how people want anonymous people on the internet to convince them to do X, Y or Z (buy a Tesla, buy this home, etc.) Those are a hoot. Many are having people on the internet convince you to spend a lot of money that you want to spend.

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F150HD
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by F150HD » Sun Feb 10, 2019 12:03 am

willthrill81 wrote:
Sat Feb 09, 2019 11:56 pm
Many who come here looking for 'advice' are actually looking for reinforcement for the decision they've already made. If they don't get it, they head for the exit.
yea, quite true. Hope he got it figured out somehow.

ohai
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by ohai » Sun Feb 10, 2019 2:10 am

Hopefully OP took this input to heart. It's not easy to recognize you're poor and downgrade your lifestyle commensurately. I'm sort of surprised that he was able to make such a detailed analysis of his spending in the beginning, and still be the sort of person who made such poor financial choices.

RobLyons
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by RobLyons » Sun Feb 10, 2019 4:30 am

I never understand the mentality of people just giving up like this. $40k isn't that much debt. It's manageable.
Make a plan
Cut your expenses
Take a 2nd job
Become uncomfortable for a while so you can live a better future
"Great parenting sets the foundation for a better world"

carol-brennan
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by carol-brennan » Sun Feb 10, 2019 8:52 am

arrieros81 wrote:
Sat Jan 05, 2019 1:07 pm
Your housing expenses are nearly 50% of your take home and that is just way too much.
This.

Plus the wife, probably.

Living below one's means: that sometimes "means" making some choices that most people, frankly, are unwilling to make, such as ditching a partner who simply does not "want" to live well below the income available.

Really, the road to wealth, in my experience, involves two things: living below one's means and making money as though one did not have to.

The first is the most crucial component, and it is a lifestyle choice. It's not really a hard lifestyle choice when one understands, or learns, that money does not buy happiness and that "things" do not buy happiness. In fact, the opposite is often true (it is in my case): things buy unhappiness, fewer options, and, as you have learned, debilitating debt.

Your story is why I look for this in a partner: someone who is a spendthrift, preferably out of a background that taught the value of money and that emphasized tranquility, inner peace, and goodwill over material possessions. Sadly, such people, these days, are terribly difficult to find--but not impossible.

carol-brennan
Posts: 277
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by carol-brennan » Sun Feb 10, 2019 9:00 am

Sam1 wrote:
Mon Jan 07, 2019 8:22 pm
I realize selling the house isn’t the best long term solution but it truly is the easiest and fastest way to get out of jail

Rent an apartment for $1k. Try and find something near your office. When the lease runs out don’t get another car. Walk.

Cut up the cards. I said this above.

Don’t buy again until you have the DP saved up yourself. Your parents did you a huge disservice because you never learned how to save. You never learned to live within your means.
Agree.

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willthrill81
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by willthrill81 » Sun Feb 10, 2019 10:28 am

RobLyons wrote:
Sun Feb 10, 2019 4:30 am
I never understand the mentality of people just giving up like this. $40k isn't that much debt. It's manageable.
I agree, but the problem in the OP's instance is that their lifestyle was sending them deeper down the hole all the time. As you note, they needed to either increase their income, which is potentially 'painful' if it entails getting a second job, or decrease their expenses, which is probably 'painful' as well.
“It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.” J.R.R. Tolkien,The Lord of the Rings

terran
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by terran » Sun Feb 10, 2019 11:54 am

Just putting this out there: the OP has neither responded to this thread nor logged in to their account since January 7th.

cherijoh
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by cherijoh » Sun Feb 10, 2019 12:11 pm

terran wrote:
Sun Feb 10, 2019 11:54 am
Just putting this out there: the OP has neither responded to this thread nor logged in to their account since January 7th.
Well, the OP joined Bogleheads several years ago - well before his post on this debt - so I doubt he is troll. But he could have been looking for confirmation of his decision and when he didn't find it he abandoned the thread. Or else maybe he has taken a second job and has no time to post.

snowman
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by snowman » Sun Feb 10, 2019 1:27 pm

cherijoh wrote:
Sun Feb 10, 2019 12:11 pm
terran wrote:
Sun Feb 10, 2019 11:54 am
Just putting this out there: the OP has neither responded to this thread nor logged in to their account since January 7th.
Well, the OP joined Bogleheads several years ago - well before his post on this debt - so I doubt he is troll. But he could have been looking for confirmation of his decision and when he didn't find it he abandoned the thread. Or else maybe he has taken a second job and has no time to post.
I agree with you, but I also think we were not given full info (as is generally the case). It looks to me more like a relationship, not financial issue. I still cannot get over the fact that his parents gave him so much money for a house he clearly cannot afford on his own. Why did they do it? Usually, the parents love to help when they can, but they also don't want to put their kid into dire financial situation, which they clearly did.

On top of it, he has a spender for a wife who likes her comforts and is not willing to give them up (probably because the Joneses's wifes spend a lot more, so she may think she is too frugal already). No wonder the guy is stressed out.

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LadyGeek
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Re: $40,000 in debt, bankruptcy seems to be the best option right now

Post by LadyGeek » Mon Feb 11, 2019 4:16 pm

The OP has not responded in this discussion since Jan 07, 2019 (over a month ago). The discussion is starting to derail. This thread is locked to keep it from derailing further.

geologist20 - If you'd like to continue the discussion, please PM me and I'll unlock the thread..
Wiki To some, the glass is half full. To others, the glass is half empty. To an engineer, it's twice the size it needs to be.

Locked