Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

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jogren
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by jogren » Fri Feb 16, 2018 8:21 am

TheAccountant wrote:
Tue Feb 13, 2018 3:32 pm
samsoes wrote:
Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:44 am
Any Megacorp job will eventually drain your soul. To have that happen at 31 is severe.

Leave. Don't burn bridges; keep smiling, but leave.
This.

Just remember, the grass isn't always greener on the other side!
But maybe it's a different more pleasing shade of green. 31 is to young to be miserable at work and a great age to take some "risk"

Jason

sesq
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by sesq » Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:33 am

I agree to look but I also agree with those who suggest you appreciate what you have. Next week I am starting a new job after 8 months of being unemployed. We were fine, financially but being unemployed isn't great since so much of your life is uncertain. My nature wouldn't let me take time off and worry about it later. "It" was always looming.

Anyways, look around and look inside. It might be an attitude change is more important than a job change.

I'd say "It gets better" - but probably better to just up your savings rate. The sooner you control your destiny the better.

GratefulinNC
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by GratefulinNC » Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:07 pm

ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Tue Feb 13, 2018 9:34 pm
Keepcalm wrote:
Tue Feb 13, 2018 7:28 am
Am I just naive at 31?

I try to take initiative to help out the department and they could all care less and I'm not even looking for a pat on the back. Just their demeanor speaks volumes. Including the head tech and the supervisor.

Makes me just want to do enough while on shift just to get by under the radar and not do a damn thing more.

Sorry for the rant but who's ran into this? Am I naive for expecting anything less in the workplace or is it time to move on?
The worst thing you can do for your career is to just give in and do enough to stay under the radar.
If you are an employee for a company, you have a job, not a career.

If you are an entreprenuer or have a private, professional practice (e.g., law, medical, accounting, etc.), you have a career.

Having said the above, if you are in a toxic or dysfunctional job, leave as soon as is reasonably possible. If you have a large emergency fund already saved, you can leave immediately. Otherwise, you may need to find another job first.

Know your situation and act accordingly.
Last edited by GratefulinNC on Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.

RRAAYY3
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by RRAAYY3 » Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:31 pm

nitro4214 wrote:
Thu Feb 15, 2018 11:15 am
Mudpuppy wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2018 12:38 pm
There are negative workplace environments everywhere, from megacorps to public sector to small businesses, and everything in between.
Amazing how we as a society put up with this nonsense.

Nobody likes to talk about it but a big part of the problem is that there are too many unqualified people in management positions who are only in their positions because they know somebody. I have heard similar stories in many companies.
I learned in life rather quickly Who is more important than What you know

GratefulinNC
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by GratefulinNC » Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:55 pm

RRAAYY3 wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:31 pm
nitro4214 wrote:
Thu Feb 15, 2018 11:15 am
Mudpuppy wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2018 12:38 pm
There are negative workplace environments everywhere, from megacorps to public sector to small businesses, and everything in between.
Amazing how we as a society put up with this nonsense.

Nobody likes to talk about it but a big part of the problem is that there are too many unqualified people in management positions who are only in their positions because they know somebody. I have heard similar stories in many companies.
I learned in life rather quickly Who is more important than What you know
True! You work for your manager, not your company. That's why when you get a new manager, you often have to start looking for a new job.

rgs92
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by rgs92 » Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:00 pm

I'm reminded of the (sort of related) saying that you live in a democracy, you don't work in one.

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samsoes
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by samsoes » Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:08 pm

Many of my recent posts deal with the soul-draining aspect of my Megacorp and why I don't have the cajones to resign even though I can easily FIRE and this place is killing me.

I'm currently in the midst if a particularly bad afternoon and have now escaped to a men's room stall for a moment of respite before I need to re-face the awfulness back in the cubicle farm.

To the OP, if you're still following this thread, go. Don't let yourself get to the point where I am now. Salvage your career, life, and soul while you still can.
"Happiness Is Not My Companion" - Gen. Gouverneur K. Warren. | (Avatar is the statue of Gen. Warren atop Little Round Top @ Gettysburg National Military Park.)

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DanMahowny
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by DanMahowny » Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:16 pm

Working sucks. I started working at age 18, fresh out of high school. I quickly realized that working sucks. I decided that 25 years is enough, and made a plan to retire young.

I worked the plan and retired at age 42 (9 years ago). Life is great now.
Funding secured

rgs92
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by rgs92 » Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:20 pm

Ha-ha, I remember doing the mens room (or conference room) thing too.
I has a lady working for me who told me she was in the habit of periodically locking herself in the ladies room for a good, long crying session.

Yep, it's tough all over. That's why I hesitate to recommend jumping ship, since this is common. You just need to realize it's part of the human condition and put a bit of a shell around yourself and not take it too seriously as much as possible.
Good luck the OP and other commenters here.

GratefulinNC
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by GratefulinNC » Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:28 pm

samsoes wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:08 pm
Many of my recent posts deal with the soul-draining aspect of my Megacorp and why I don't have the cajones to resign even though I can easily FIRE and this place is killing me.

I'm currently in the midst if a particularly bad afternoon and have now escaped to a men's room stall for a moment of respite before I need to re-face the awfulness back in the cubicle farm.

To the OP, if you're still following this thread, go. Don't let yourself get to the point where I am now. Salvage your career, life, and soul while you still can.
People quit their jobs all the time.

Today is different than 30 years ago. There is no emloyer loyalty anymore. There is absolutely nothing wrong in walking away. There is a lot wrong with martyring yourself.

You are financially independent (FI). If I were unhappy and FI, I would quit today. For me, it would be a very easy decision.

It is your life and, therefore, your decision. Listen to your gut.
Last edited by GratefulinNC on Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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samsoes
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by samsoes » Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:36 pm

DanMahowny wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:16 pm
Working sucks. I started working at age 18, fresh out of high school. I quickly realized that working sucks. I decided that 25 years is enough, and made a plan to retire young.

I worked the plan and retired at age 42 (9 years ago). Life is great now.
You're my inspiration.

May I ask how many years expenses you had saved when you pulled the ripcord? I have roughly 67x of my aggregate current annual expenses saved, with about 60% of that in pre-tax IRA/401(k) accounts. This is not including anticipated social security.

(The annual expense factor is current and exact with no built-in wiggle room.)
"Happiness Is Not My Companion" - Gen. Gouverneur K. Warren. | (Avatar is the statue of Gen. Warren atop Little Round Top @ Gettysburg National Military Park.)

Golf maniac
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by Golf maniac » Fri Feb 16, 2018 7:10 pm

If I were in the OP shoes I would go to someone I trust in the company and discuss the situation. I would also ask for their brutal honesty about my performance and shortcomings. That can be a difficult discussion, but well worth the effort. But make sure it is someone you absolutely trust to keep it between the two of you.

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Sandtrap
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by Sandtrap » Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:23 pm

Golf maniac wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 7:10 pm
If I were in the OP shoes I would go to someone I trust in the company and discuss the situation. I would also ask for their brutal honesty about my performance and shortcomings. That can be a difficult discussion, but well worth the effort. But make sure it is someone you absolutely trust to keep it between the two of you.
+1
Sometimes a 3rd party, "fresh pair of eyes" on the situation can reveal a lot. Often, things are not as we see.
j :D

ImUrHuckleberry
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by ImUrHuckleberry » Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:31 pm

GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:07 pm
If you are an employee for a company, you have a job, not a career.
Wrong

TallBoy29er
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by TallBoy29er » Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:34 pm

Keepcalm wrote:
Tue Feb 13, 2018 7:28 am
Am I just naive at 31?

I try to take initiative to help out the department and they could all care less and I'm not even looking for a pat on the back. Just their demeanor speaks volumes. Including the head tech and the supervisor.

Makes me just want to do enough while on shift just to get by under the radar and not do a damn thing more.

Sorry for the rant but who's ran into this? Am I naive for expecting anything less in the workplace or is it time to move on?
Just trying to give some perspective. Maybe "help (ing) out" is in the eye of the beholder. I like the advice about seeking counsel above. Perhaps a mentor in your current org, whether formal or not (meet a seasoned prof for lunch), could be helpful. This is sincere advice. I understand your angle.

GratefulinNC
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by GratefulinNC » Fri Feb 16, 2018 10:17 pm

ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:31 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:07 pm
If you are an employee for a company, you have a job, not a career.
Wrong
I would be interested in your persoective. Please elaborate.

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Cycle
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by Cycle » Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:02 pm

GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 10:17 pm
ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:31 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:07 pm
If you are an employee for a company, you have a job, not a career.
Wrong
I would be interested in your persoective. Please elaborate.
A career is: an occupation undertaken for a significant period of a person's life and with opportunities for progress.

ImUrHuckleberry
Posts: 136
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by ImUrHuckleberry » Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:11 pm

GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 10:17 pm
ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:31 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:07 pm
If you are an employee for a company, you have a job, not a career.
Wrong
I would be interested in your persoective. Please elaborate.
Purely by definition of career, you are wrong.

But to elaborate; your employer doesn't own you. You build skills and cultivate networks and are free to leverage this and move on to the next employer or into self employment as you build your career. Hanging on doing the bare minimum is sabotaging your future self.

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Cycle
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by Cycle » Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:11 pm

samsoes wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:08 pm
Many of my recent posts deal with the soul-draining aspect of my Megacorp and why I don't have the cajones to resign even though I can easily FIRE and this place is killing me.

I'm currently in the midst if a particularly bad afternoon and have now escaped to a men's room stall for a moment of respite before I need to re-face the awfulness back in the cubicle farm.

To the OP, if you're still following this thread, go. Don't let yourself get to the point where I am now. Salvage your career, life, and soul while you still can.
Not all megacorps are bad. A lot of times it just depends on ones team and manager.

I've been at my company 10 years, and find the job to be a pretty good gig. The projects are complicated, we have plenty of funding in R&D, and we only work 40hrs a week. Also, I get 5 weeks of vacation and the pay is extremely competitive.

I have heard people complain about the toxicity of our work environment and that left because of it... Difference being they didn't get along with their manager, whereas my manager is great.

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Cycle
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by Cycle » Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:14 pm

ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:11 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 10:17 pm
ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:31 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:07 pm
If you are an employee for a company, you have a job, not a career.
Wrong
I would be interested in your persoective. Please elaborate.
Purely by definition of career, you are wrong.

But to elaborate; your employer doesn't own you. You build skills and cultivate networks and are free to leverage this and move on to the next employer or into self employment as you build your career. Hanging on doing the bare minimum is sabotaging your future self.
U are paid at megacorp in personal capital and cash. Personal capital is the skills and network you have. Personal capital is often best cultivated at megacorp, at least for a handful of years, due to the vast resources, training opportunities, and mentors.

RRAAYY3
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by RRAAYY3 » Sat Feb 17, 2018 9:09 am

samsoes wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:08 pm
Many of my recent posts deal with the soul-draining aspect of my Megacorp and why I don't have the cajones to resign even though I can easily FIRE and this place is killing me.

I'm currently in the midst if a particularly bad afternoon and have now escaped to a men's room stall for a moment of respite before I need to re-face the awfulness back in the cubicle farm.

To the OP, if you're still following this thread, go. Don't let yourself get to the point where I am now. Salvage your career, life, and soul while you still can.
Actively choosing to hide in bathroom stalls for respite = sign it’s time to go

(Not judging - I’ve been there. My first job out of college became such a nightmare I considered becoming a smoker just to get the extra breaks ...)

TallBoy29er
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by TallBoy29er » Sat Feb 17, 2018 9:15 am

ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:11 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 10:17 pm
ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:31 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:07 pm
If you are an employee for a company, you have a job, not a career.
Wrong
I would be interested in your persoective. Please elaborate.
Purely by definition of career, you are wrong.

But to elaborate; your employer doesn't own you. You build skills and cultivate networks and are free to leverage this and move on to the next employer or into self employment as you build your career. Hanging on doing the bare minimum is sabotaging your future self.
I've heard it talked about in three categories: job, career, or calling. They escalate in terms of engagement and personal meaning. However, none of the three require you to be an entrepreneur, or conversely, to be part of a larger organization of which one exerts limited control. This may help:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/ca ... aning-work

marcopolo
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by marcopolo » Sat Feb 17, 2018 9:29 am

samsoes wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:08 pm
Many of my recent posts deal with the soul-draining aspect of my Megacorp and why I don't have the cajones to resign even though I can easily FIRE and this place is killing me.

I'm currently in the midst if a particularly bad afternoon and have now escaped to a men's room stall for a moment of respite before I need to re-face the awfulness back in the cubicle farm.

To the OP, if you're still following this thread, go. Don't let yourself get to the point where I am now. Salvage your career, life, and soul while you still can.
samsoes wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:36 pm
I have roughly 67x of my aggregate current annual expenses saved, with about 60% of that in pre-tax IRA/401(k) accounts. This is not including anticipated social security.
Given the second quoted post, I can not fathom why you would tolerate the situation in the first. Maybe you are young and your expenses will increase, but even then, at 67x expenses, you can certainly afford to take some time away from a toxic work situation. Why are you staying?
Once in a while you get shown the light, in the strangest of places if you look at it right.

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samsoes
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by samsoes » Sat Feb 17, 2018 11:57 am

marcopolo wrote:
Sat Feb 17, 2018 9:29 am
samsoes wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:08 pm
Many of my recent posts deal with the soul-draining aspect of my Megacorp and why I don't have the cajones to resign even though I can easily FIRE and this place is killing me.

I'm currently in the midst if a particularly bad afternoon and have now escaped to a men's room stall for a moment of respite before I need to re-face the awfulness back in the cubicle farm.

To the OP, if you're still following this thread, go. Don't let yourself get to the point where I am now. Salvage your career, life, and soul while you still can.
samsoes wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:36 pm
I have roughly 67x of my aggregate current annual expenses saved, with about 60% of that in pre-tax IRA/401(k) accounts. This is not including anticipated social security.
Given the second quoted post, I can not fathom why you would tolerate the situation in the first. Maybe you are young and your expenses will increase, but even then, at 67x expenses, you can certainly afford to take some time away from a toxic work situation. Why are you staying?
I'm in my mid 50's

There is a plan: I've front-loaded my 401(k), used most of my annual FSA allotment on a dental crown, new glasses and Rx sunglasses, got my annual bonus (75% to 401k), and annual vesting in company stock award (which I promptly liquidated). Another month or so and I'll be in the ACA sweet-spot so as to avoid cliffs.

That's the plan. We'll see if I have the guts to pull it off.
"Happiness Is Not My Companion" - Gen. Gouverneur K. Warren. | (Avatar is the statue of Gen. Warren atop Little Round Top @ Gettysburg National Military Park.)

HEDGEFUNDIE
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by HEDGEFUNDIE » Sun Feb 18, 2018 8:15 am

rgs92 wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:20 pm
You just need to realize it's part of the human condition and put a bit of a shell around yourself and not take it too seriously as much as possible.
This is key. I find it useful to remind oneself that it’s just work, no one will die or get hurt because anything I do (true of vast majority of MgeaCorp jobs). Coworkers are at work for the same reason I am, to draw a paycheck to cover a decent quality of life. So why be miserable about it? Put a smile on your face and let the pettiness roll off your back.

GratefulinNC
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by GratefulinNC » Sun Feb 18, 2018 12:39 pm

HEDGEFUNDIE wrote:
Sun Feb 18, 2018 8:15 am
rgs92 wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:20 pm
You just need to realize it's part of the human condition and put a bit of a shell around yourself and not take it too seriously as much as possible.
This is key. I find it useful to remind oneself that it’s just work, no one will die or get hurt because anything I do (true of vast majority of MgeaCorp jobs). Coworkers are at work for the same reason I am, to draw a paycheck to cover a decent quality of life. So why be miserable about it? Put a smile on your face and let the pettiness roll off your back.

The above statement aasumes that the workplace is a win/win game. Sometimes, it is not.

For example, if you have carried a sales quota, you know that you have crush your competition. Your job is about one thing only, bringing in sales revenue.

In sales, you eat what you kill.

===

Oftentimes, management not only pits salespeople against external competition, but against fellow colleagues. Therefore, many salespeople view workplace success as a zero sum game.

This leads to a lot of workplace politics. I know first hand how unpleasant this situation can be. Unfortunately, work cannot be all peaches and cream.

Many organizations -- especially sales organizations -- intentionally create a win/lose social dynamic to increase productivity.
Last edited by GratefulinNC on Sun Feb 18, 2018 5:39 pm, edited 10 times in total.

Mr. Digweed
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by Mr. Digweed » Sun Feb 18, 2018 1:02 pm

"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation"

Dottie57
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by Dottie57 » Sun Feb 18, 2018 1:28 pm

samsoes wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:36 pm
DanMahowny wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 2:16 pm
Working sucks. I started working at age 18, fresh out of high school. I quickly realized that working sucks. I decided that 25 years is enough, and made a plan to retire young.

I worked the plan and retired at age 42 (9 years ago). Life is great now.
You're my inspiration.

May I ask how many years expenses you had saved when you pulled the ripcord? I have roughly 67x of my aggregate current annual expenses saved, with about 60% of that in pre-tax IRA/401(k) accounts. This is not including anticipated social security.

(The annual expense factor is current and exact with no built-in wiggle room.)
You have 67 times expenses? And you are miserable? Leave! Walk in tomorrow and say "I quit".

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randomizer
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by randomizer » Sun Feb 18, 2018 1:32 pm

Seems like a fairly common experience from my point of view. Your employer is not your friend, not your family, and comprises a set of apathetic or self-interested agents. Oh, and maybe a few good eggs too.
87.5:12.5, EM tilt — HODL the course!

GratefulinNC
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by GratefulinNC » Sun Feb 18, 2018 3:21 pm

ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:11 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 10:17 pm
ImUrHuckleberry wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 9:31 pm
GratefulinNC wrote:
Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:07 pm
If you are an employee for a company, you have a job, not a career.
Wrong
I would be interested in your persoective. Please elaborate.
Purely by definition of career, you are wrong.

But to elaborate; your employer doesn't own you. You build skills and cultivate networks and are free to leverage this and move on to the next employer or into self employment as you build your career. Hanging on doing the bare minimum is sabotaging your future self.
+1 Thank you. I stand corrected.

Swimmer
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Re: Job is starting to suck the life out of me.

Post by Swimmer » Mon Feb 19, 2018 7:01 am

I’m very happily retired now, but looking back I see that I took things much too seriously and cared far too much. That’s my nature. I would have been much happier had I just lightened up and gone with the flow. I worked for Government and not-for-profits. So glad we saved and were able to retire early.

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