Husband just lost job

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Topic Author
Nyc1967
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Husband just lost job

Post by Nyc1967 »

Totally stressed and scared. My husband was fired - union is fighting to get his job back but that could take weeks, months if not longer. I work p/t and only make about 800 a month will get some extra hours so maybe 1000.00. We are going to apply for unemployment today. We will loose health ins end of month I think. We have kids early teens

Talk about things changing in minutes notice - we were planning on paying off our mortgage this month so have that 40,000 sitting in the bank which we will use to pay our monthly mortgage payments. We have no debt and an emergency fund - which scares me to even have to use. We even have a heloc we just got but again do not want to have to touch unless god forbid we have no choice.

Any advice for the immediate? We live in nyc nit sure if I could get any type of assistance since we have cash in the bank
Last edited by Nyc1967 on Sat May 24, 2014 5:23 am, edited 1 time in total.
J295
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by J295 »

Sorry to hear about your situation.
Take some deep breathes and do your best to be calm in what admittedly is difficult circumstances.
Good for you that you have your home essentially paid off and that you have an emergency fund. I can understand not wanting to use it, but there is a reason it is called "emergency" fund, and this would qualify so use it as necessary.
In my opinion, you must retain health insurance, as the potential damages from not being insured are too great to risk. I don't know anything about union matters, but know that typically COBRA applies for terminated employees (and the Affordable Care Act is likely also an option -- search google and this forum for information on COBRA and ACA).
Best wishes.
livesoft
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by livesoft »

Here is a recent thread on job loss that I found helpful:
http://www.bogleheads.org/forum/viewtop ... 2&t=136470
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lululu
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by lululu »

J295 wrote:Sorry to hear about your situation.
Take some deep breathes and do your best to be calm in what admittedly is difficult circumstances.
Good for you that you have your home essentially paid off and that you have an emergency fund. I can understand not wanting to use it, but there is a reason it is called "emergency" fund, and this would qualify so use it as necessary.
In my opinion, you must retain health insurance, as the potential damages from not being insured are too great to risk. I don't know anything about union matters, but know that typically COBRA applies for terminated employees (and the Affordable Care Act is likely also an option -- search google and this forum for information on COBRA and ACA).
Best wishes.
I know that this is scary and a real blow to self esteem.

I think someone posted in another thread that the first 60 days on cobra (verify this rather than depending on what I say) can be "free" because you have that long to pay for it retroactively or not, meanwhile the coverage is there if you need it. Also as noted, the ACA (Obamacare) may be your friend in this situation. Go to your state's website or the fed's website, whichever applies and run some number and see if you will qualify for subsidies, what the premiums are. Don't forget to check that your doctors accept whatever plan you are considering.

There are enrollment times for the ACA, but I suspect losing health insurance is a qualifying event to sign up any time.

You are fortunate to have those savings and the heloc option. How do these stack up to your expenses?

Do the unemployment application right away. The payments take a week or two or so to start.

I would also have hubby start looking for work, something comparable, or something different he always wanted to do, or just something to keep money coming in.
ajcp
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by ajcp »

lululu wrote: There are enrollment times for the ACA, but I suspect losing health insurance is a qualifying event to sign up any time.
It definitely is, so that and COBRA are things to look into and see what works best for you.

Sorry to hear about your situation, and being stressed and scared is completely understandable. But you have a lot going for you all things considered. Your part time work will stretch out the emergency fund to make it last even longer. Plus having that extra $40,000 available is a huge boost. I'm not sure what assistance is available, it probably depends on what other money you have (investments, etc.). Best of luck to you.
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dm200
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by dm200 »

This sure does sound like an "emergency". Seems to me that this is exactly the type of situation you have the $40,000 stashed away to deal with.

Does the union provide any type of monetary assistance?

I would also evaluate an ACA health plan vs. COBRA - if that is possible.
epictetus
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by epictetus »

very scary and stressful.
but you have several things going for you:
no debt except mortgage
40,000 emergency fund available
your ability to make 800-1000 month.

would suggest focusing on what you can immediately control: looking for places to cut your expenses during this time.

do you have a sense of what your monthly costs are? and how much of those can be cut back on?
Focus on what you can control
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BL
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by BL »

You have described an emergency. That is what emergency funds are for! Be sure to get insurance.

The whole family needs to pitch in on this and all will benefit. Let the kids brainstorm on what they can do as well. The kids may be able to earn some money to cover summer spending; look to cut expenses like cable, some phones, eating out, shopping, etc. It is amazing how much can be cut on a temporary basis when an effort is made to do just that.

With unemployment, part time work, extra work, etc., you will get back on your feet either here or find another job of some kind. Your spouse needs to make full time job of job-searching, and keep up exercising, consider part-time work or volunteering, and do whatever helps to maintain good physical and mental health at this stressful time.
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Gambler
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Gambler »

Nyc1967 wrote:Totally stressed and scared. My husband was fired - union is fighting to get his job back but that could take weeks, months if not longer. I work p/t and only make about 800 a month will get some extra hours so maybe 1000.00. We are going to apply for unemployment today. We will loose health ins end of month I think. We have kids early teens

Talk about things changing in minutes notice - we were planning on paying off our mortgage this month so have that 40,000 sitting in the bank which we will use to pay our monthly mortgage payments. We have no debt and an emergency fund - which scares me to even have to use. We even have a heloc we just got but again do not want to have to touch unless god forbid we have no choice.

Any advice for the immediate? We live in nyc nit sure if I could get any type of assistance since we have cash in the bank
1) breathe. based on what you said, you're not going to lose the house and become homeless next month. relax a little.
2) $40k is a nice chunk of $. and how much is your emergency fund? and HELOC? and how much are your bare monthly expenses?
I say bare since you're probably going to cut down on spending.

3) COBRA for heathcare. but I suspect for a family plan in NYC, its going to be $1000+/month.
4) unemployment should bring about $400/week or $10k for the max 6months.
5) don't be scared of HELOC. the 1st 5yrs is paying interest only. $50k HELOC draw is only like $150/month interest payment.

6) Breathe
Last edited by Gambler on Sat May 24, 2014 8:11 am, edited 1 time in total.
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twindad57
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by twindad57 »

Am sorry for your situation. Your feelings are completely understandable. While difficult I would certainly try to be as calm as possible in front of the kids, but try to use this as a real world example of how to deal with something difficult. You have little debt, an emergency fund, a source of funds (heloc), your income and a spouse with marketable skills.

No doubt this is tough and unexpected, but aren't all emergencies? The teaching moment here can at least be a bright spot in an otherwise tough situation. Look at all the things mom & dad did right for just such an emergency. What can we do together to implement a response plan and come out of this even better, stronger, closer?
MN Finance
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by MN Finance »

Beyond the already good suggestions, take a look at how long the 40k will last at your current spending rate, or reduced speeding rate if there are easy cuts you can make. You'll find that if you can quantify the time frame, you'll feel more in control. "This stinks but our money will last until August 15th" gives you perspective. Im the sole breadwinner of a family of 6 and when my job ended, I was able to say, we can go 12 months. I spent the full year working on my plan and did so without the pressure of rushing. Also identify what other savings you can tap if the 40 gets used. You can draw from a 457 without penalty. You can also take Roth contributions out. If you don't have a line of credit on the house, get one. If you add up all the sources, you might find you have more than you think. This isn't good, but this is what your money and planning are there for.
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stemikger
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by stemikger »

Sorry to hear about this. Like others have said check if your State participates in the ACA. If so I believe you can join at any time due to a job loss and since they go on what your annual salary is, it should be very affordable.

I checked this out in my State and if I was showing little to no income I was able to go on the expanded Medicaid option and that would have been free. I live in New York which got on board completely so it really depends on what State you are in.

I know most people say use a HELOC for an emergency during this time, but that is just using money you will have to pay back. I will try to avoid that if possible.

Good Luck and try to take one day at a time. Sometimes these events are blessings in disguise.
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Topic Author
Nyc1967
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Nyc1967 »

Yes, spent the morning cutting cell phone bill and cable.

The union is fighting for my husband and it all takes time - I feel for my kids and will try to sound more uplifting about this situation but it is hard. Applied for unemployment this morning so getting stuff done.

Kids will be in camp this summer so that will keep them very busy and that is already paid for - they will just need spending which I have set aside. We have a couple of vacations planned which I will have to cancel if things don't work out for us I. The near future.

Thanks for the support and suggestions
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Sheepdog
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Sheepdog »

Nothing has been said about your husband employment searching such as networking, updating resume, LinkenIn website, etc. Would you consider moving to another area? And so on.

edit. He and you shouldn't wait for a union appeal to start researching new employment.. After all, it may not work, even if he is in the right....and I bet he is. After 21 years working for one company, he must have excellent experience to make him valuable for some one else. This will keep you both busy. Start by writing down his experiences and training and then writing that resume'.
Don't let him sit back and feel defeated. He isn't.
Last edited by Sheepdog on Sat May 24, 2014 12:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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lululu
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by lululu »

stemikger wrote:Like others have said check if your State participates in the ACA.
The ACA is available to residents of all states. Some states run their own websites for signing up, others have their residents use the federal website.

https://nystateofhealth.ny.gov/

Possibly you are thinking of the Medicaid expansion associated with ACA, funded by the feds, but which requires states to opt in. Not all states participate in that, but New York, where from the OP's name I assume she lives, does.

(Admin start delete here) Thank your lucky stars that you live in a blue state, because it's pretty much blue = Medicaid expansion, red = not. (Admin end delete here) :D

If you feel confident your husband will get his job back, he might get paid for the time lost. That would be something to ask the union lawyer.
Calm Man
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Calm Man »

One piece of advice for you and other women is one of my constant rants. Why should a woman put her entire security on the job and life of a man who happens at that moment in time to be her husband? You sound like a capable person and $800 a month, going up to $1000, is nothing. So watch your costs, let him find another job and you hopefully can find a real job for yourself. This may be a blessing in disguise. My experience with people with union jobs that lose them is that either the job was eliminated or the people did something very bad or were grossly incompetent. I suspect your husband's position was simply eliminated.... Good luck to you.
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Nyc1967
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Nyc1967 »

No not eliminated a customer put in a complaint - not a bad complaint and he has been with his job for 21 years so yes we are letting the union do there thing - and yes it's a big possibility we will get the lost wages back but again no guarantee. I work p/t because my kids are 12 and 14 -
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Rob5TCP
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Rob5TCP »

That seems incredibly harsh. Depending on the Union, they have a fair amount of "power" in NY State, so he would have a better chance here than in a right to work state.
This can seem incredibly scary (having been fired over a half dozen times before I started my own business).

Prepare, as best you can, for the worst outcome. Hopefully, all back wages and things will work out OK. But, if you prepare, you can have all bases covered.
All the best.
killjoy2012
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by killjoy2012 »

I was laid off in late 2008, back when things were really bad. Luckily, I was single, financially responsible, and in a good position to deal with it. In fact, after I was let go, my first to-do was to book a month-long trip to Egypt and Spain. It was well deserved as I was slaving away 60+ hours a week (salary) for years w/o taking hardly any vacation and working in a very unhealthy work environment - this was the break I needed to clear my head, recharge, and start looking for new opportunities. So, while it may be frightening now - I would take a deep breath & figure out how to find the positive in the situation. e.g. Summertime is just starting, this may be a great opportunity to fully contribute to a Roth if you haven't been, and possibly convert tIRAs to Roths since your tax bracket will probably be artificially low this year, etc.

Hopefully your husband works in a field that has some demand and finding a new job won't take that long. And as other have said, while COBRA should be offered, when I was laid off, I was light years ahead by going direct to BCBS and getting a personal plan. COBRA was very expensive, especially for someone who rarely used it.
2stepsbehind
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by 2stepsbehind »

Nyc1967 wrote:No not eliminated a customer put in a complaint - not a bad complaint and he has been with his job for 21 years so yes we are letting the union do there thing - and yes it's a big possibility we will get the lost wages back but again no guarantee. I work p/t because my kids are 12 and 14 -
what kind of complaint is not a bad one? my guess is your husband isn't telling you the full story, but I hope things work out well for you.
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stemikger
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by stemikger »

lululu wrote:
stemikger wrote:Like others have said check if your State participates in the ACA.
The ACA is available to residents of all states. Some states run their own websites for signing up, others have their residents use the federal website.

https://nystateofhealth.ny.gov/

Possibly you are thinking of the Medicaid expansion associated with ACA, funded by the feds, but which requires states to opt in. Not all states participate in that, but New York, where from the OP's name I assume she lives, does.
You are correct. I was really referring to the Medicaid expansion part. COBRA is a joke if you lose your job and if you live in a State that does not participate the ACA still might be out of reach. I do thank God I live in New York because this was always one of my big fears if I lost my job, but from what I understand under the ACA without an income or low income I will be able to get on the Medicaid expansion and get by on unemployment until I get another job and let's face it, at 50 years old it's not as easy as it was at 30 years old. Before this, COBRA was like $1,800 per month for family coverage. Who could afford that if you lost your job?
Choose Simplicity ~ Stay the Course!! ~ Press on Regardless!!!
Dave1
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Dave1 »

Calm Man wrote:One piece of advice for you and other women is one of my constant rants. Why should a woman put her entire security on the job and life of a man who happens at that moment in time to be her husband? You sound like a capable person and $800 a month, going up to $1000, is nothing. So watch your costs, let him find another job and you hopefully can find a real job for yourself. This may be a blessing in disguise. My experience with people with union jobs that lose them is that either the job was eliminated or the people did something very bad or were grossly incompetent. I suspect your husband's position was simply eliminated.... Good luck to you.
As a woman I agree with you that women should seek the same financial independence as men in comparable situation.
ETA: LOL this is Mrs. D in case that wasn't clear!
Dave1
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Dave1 »

lululu wrote: I think someone posted in another thread that the first 60 days on cobra (verify this rather than depending on what I say) can be "free" because you have that long to pay for it retroactively or not, meanwhile the coverage is there if you need it.
I don't know if this is still the case, but this was the advice I got from HR when I was laid off many years back. Accordingly I kept all the COBRA paperwork in case I needed to use it, but luckily did not need to during the month or so before I landed the new job. It is certainly worth looking into.
Topic Author
Nyc1967
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Nyc1967 »

No he is telling me the entire truth. This is why the union has been fighting it - makes no sense
KyleAAA
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by KyleAAA »

The best thing I did when I got laid off in 2008 was to tell absolutely everybody I knew about it. Got several job leads within days and a few interviews out of it. It's always surprising who the people you know might know.
Last edited by KyleAAA on Sat May 24, 2014 4:40 pm, edited 3 times in total.
mathwhiz
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by mathwhiz »

You may have to plan for the worst case scenario if your husband does not regain his employment. NY is a high cost of living state and you probably have substantial equity in your home since NY housing prices are much higher than the national average. You should start investigating employment opportunities in low cost of living states. Florida is very popular for New Yorkers since it lacks a state income tax. Lots of folks sell their homes in NY and purchase homes in cash elsewhere with lots of cash left ofter.
Achelois
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Achelois »

Calm Man wrote:One piece of advice for you and other women is one of my constant rants. Why should a woman put her entire security on the job and life of a man who happens at that moment in time to be her husband? You sound like a capable person and $800 a month, going up to $1000, is nothing. So watch your costs, let him find another job and you hopefully can find a real job for yourself. This may be a blessing in disguise. My experience with people with union jobs that lose them is that either the job was eliminated or the people did something very bad or were grossly incompetent. I suspect your husband's position was simply eliminated.... Good luck to you.

With respect, there are many reasons women do this: religious reasons, some husbands do not want their wives to work, moving to follow husbands' jobs and support his career, educational differences among them.

I happen to be among those women who have always worked and who have never wanted to be dependent on someone else, but I had to struggle to become and remain this way over the objections and even sabotage of men in my life. I am 62, so that may have a bearing to some degree. I do not want to go into the whole story, but whatever OP's reasons, I believe she wished to place her children and husband first and made the decision she believed best.



Hindsight is always clearer than foresight. My working and doing well cost me a husband. I made my choice and live with it, but things are not always easy for women.

As the OP does work part time, it may be possible for her to pick up more hours.
Professor Emeritus
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Professor Emeritus »

Take heart - DW was fired for refusing to do something unethical and possibly unlawful. The job change was in fact the best thing that ever happened to her. She went from being unappreciated to being adored I do agree with the advice, if not the tone of some of the other posters but the importance of maintaining your own job skills. Talk with your employer about needing additional work.
Professor Emeritus
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Professor Emeritus »

Achelois wrote:
I happen to be among those women who have always worked and who have never wanted to be dependent on someone else, but I had to struggle to become and remain this way over the objections and even sabotage of men in my life. I am 62, so that may have a bearing to some degree. I do not want to go into the whole story, but whatever OP's reasons, I believe she wished to place her children and husband first and made the decision she believed best.
Hindsight is always clearer than foresight. My working and doing well cost me a husband. I made my choice and live with it, but things are not always easy for women. As the OP does work part time, it may be possible for her to pick up more hours.

I always get upset when I hear stories like yours. i just don't know what is wrong with some guys. I put my wife and children first. DW just turned 62. I am proud to say that she made more money and is much more "famous" than I am. It is a good thing for me that she is nearly blind without her glasses and can't cook a lick. She is a wonderful role model for our daughters.
TIAX
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by TIAX »

What type of job did he have? Perhaps people will have some ideas.
sambb
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by sambb »

you have my sympathies for this stress
Everyone needs to get a job for the summer if they can
let this bring your family together
start looking anywhere one can, and hopefully in the skill set you each possess
Big Worm
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Big Worm »

Professor Emeritus wrote:Take heart - DW was fired for refusing to do something unethical and possibly unlawful. The job change was in fact the best thing that ever happened to her. She went from being unappreciated to being adored I do agree with the advice, if not the tone of some of the other posters but the importance of maintaining your own job skills. Talk with your employer about needing additional work.
Who/what is DW? I see initials like this sometimes on this site and don't know what they mean.
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cfs
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by cfs »

Big Worm wrote:Who/what is DW? I see initials like this sometimes on this site and don't know what they mean.
Note, definitions (as used in this forum)

DW = Dear Wife

DH = Dear Husband
~ Member of the Active Retired Force since 2014 ~
Topic Author
Nyc1967
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Nyc1967 »

He is a field technician. Installs / repairs phones
Calm Man
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Calm Man »

Nyc1967 wrote:No not eliminated a customer put in a complaint - not a bad complaint and he has been with his job for 21 years so yes we are letting the union do there thing - and yes it's a big possibility we will get the lost wages back but again no guarantee. I work p/t because my kids are 12 and 14 -
Whatever suits you. I hope you provide these teenagers with what they need when they are home from school.
Calm Man
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Calm Man »

Achelois wrote:
Calm Man wrote:One piece of advice for you and other women is one of my constant rants. Why should a woman put her entire security on the job and life of a man who happens at that moment in time to be her husband? You sound like a capable person and $800 a month, going up to $1000, is nothing. So watch your costs, let him find another job and you hopefully can find a real job for yourself. This may be a blessing in disguise. My experience with people with union jobs that lose them is that either the job was eliminated or the people did something very bad or were grossly incompetent. I suspect your husband's position was simply eliminated.... Good luck to you.

With respect, there are many reasons women do this: religious reasons, some husbands do not want their wives to work, moving to follow husbands' jobs and support his career, educational differences among them.

I happen to be among those women who have always worked and who have never wanted to be dependent on someone else, but I had to struggle to become and remain this way over the objections and even sabotage of men in my life. I am 62, so that may have a bearing to some degree. I do not want to go into the whole story, but whatever OP's reasons, I believe she wished to place her children and husband first and made the decision she believed best.



Hindsight is always clearer than foresight. My working and doing well cost me a husband. I made my choice and live with it, but things are not always easy for women.

As the OP does work part time, it may be possible for her to pick up more hours.
Why should a woman do WHAT A HUSBAND WANTS? Or follow the husbands obs? Is that more important than her needs. Everything you list is the woman doing what the man wants. Why do you have such a thought? If you follow current society, there is a movement finally for women's rights and equality. Religious? What religion would place a man's needs over a woman's needs. These are excuses. I am a moderate male who thinks women are equal to men...
Big Worm
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Big Worm »

cfs wrote:
Big Worm wrote:Who/what is DW? I see initials like this sometimes on this site and don't know what they mean.
Note, definitions (as used in this forum)

DW = Dear Wife

DH = Dear Husband
Thanks!
mur44
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by mur44 »

Things will always get better with time.
Have lots of patience.

Nothing is gained by worrying.
michaelsieg
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by michaelsieg »

I am sorry for your situation and I hope all will work out well for your family.
I agree with Calm Man that it is really important that women maintain/advance their professional skills with a family, it adds a lot of security to a family if one knows, that either partner's salary can carry the basic expenses and I think solves a lot of issues in relationships about (perceived) dependency.
In terms of finances, I would - once you can think calmly - sit down an take the time to run the numbers. Go over them with your husband. I personally would try everything to stay in the area where you are at home, so your teenage children don't have to change schools.
One question, that seems important, is your cost of living with and without a mortgage - assume he has no job for a long time, how long can you go with your savings/unemployment/your salary if you still have a monthly mortgage payment and how long can you go if you paid off the mortgage now. If the difference in time is large, the decision is easy, if it is small, it is a difficult decision what to do. If you owned your home clear then, no matter what happens, you will be able to stay there, but on the other hand, you probably would not want to spent most of your emergency fund on a mortgage.
I would also take the time to look at all fixed expenses and cut them down to bare bones.
Also, don't forget that HELOC credit lines can disappear when you need them most, banks can cancel them if they feel the "credit quality "of the potential lender has significantly changed.
For your husband, it is important that he has a routine and a structure in his life. I would make sure he works out regularly and may be picks up chores that so far you have been doing - i.e. drive the kids to school, after school events, start cutting your own lawn and so on - it probably would help him if he gets out there and does not sit alone at home while everyone else is at school/work.
absolutFinance
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by absolutFinance »

FWIW on health care insurance, if anyone in your family has a condition or recurring treatment, closely compare your current plan (available through COBRA) with the various options available through the ACA. If you have no unique requirements that make COBRA necessary, odds are you will save a considerable amount of money on premiums through the exchange. For comparison in the state I live, my health insurance through my employer for the family is $1300/month. Gold plans through the exchange are around $800/month. There are some gaps in coverage and higher deductibles with the ACA gold plan so it's really important to go through all the details.

I was a teenager when my family went through a similar situation and we were in a nearly identical spot with my mother earning some money on the side but my father providing the bulk of the income. They had an emergency fund that covered things until he found a new position but we also downsized on things considerably to stretch the emergency fund. Once everyone got in the mindset, going without things we were used to was fine (and we didn't have much).
Caduceus
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Caduceus »

With temporary "crises" like these, apart from insurance, the situation is really about cash flow. I think it might be a good idea to take a good look at what your cash flow will look like every month over the next 6 - 12 months. Be comprehensive and include everything imaginable (credit card statements are a good place to start), and you may feel a little more in control as that will give you a good sense of how long your liquid assets will last for (probably for quite a while.) It would also be a place to start for temporary cutbacks to expenses (e.g. canceling subscriptions, switching to less expensive plans of all sorts, etc.)

I hope everything works out for your family.
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patriciamgr2
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by patriciamgr2 »

I'm sorry about this setback for your family.

As earlier posters have noted, you need to draw up an austerity budget ASAP.

If your family's only income is unemployment & your $1K per month, you may qualify for subsidies under ACA for next year, and perhaps for this year, even with his earnings to date. I'm confused by some of the prices quoted by other posters--are those post-subsidy prices in NY? Visit your state's website this weekend. I would like to respectfully disagree with the idea of "coasting" on retroactive reliance on 60 days' of COBRA. That works well for people who are on their way to a definite job, but your post indicated that it may take a while for the situation to be resolved. If you qualify for a subsidy, ACA is likely to be more affordable than COBRA. Also, (1) while losing insurance coverage is likely to be a "life event" that allows you to sign up for ACA health insurance, I don't know (2) how long that enrollment "window' stays open. You absolutely can not go without health insurance. Please be sure to check on both those issues when you visit your state's website to which another Forum member helpfully provided a link.

Your husband must try to find at least temporary work while his employment appeal is pending. Given the way you believe he was treated, perhaps finding a new long-term job elsewhere is a better alternative. If that will require your family to relocate, you and the children need to be open to that & do all you can to prep the house for a quick sale.

As soon as your husband's job loss is disclosed, standard HELOC terms allow your bank to cancel the HELOC. I wouldn't count on that money being available unless you're able to draw it down without having to sign financial disclosures.

In general, family practices which were desirable in better times may need to be rethought while your husband's employment situation is in flux. Perhaps now is the time for the kids to become more independent as you take on full-time work. Can camp fees be refunded? At a minimum, they need to earn their spending money. [On a personal note, my parents went through difficult financial times (also not their fault) from when I was younger than your children through my college days. I was always willing to do my part. Children are part of a family, not just recipients of parental aid. I'm sure you've raised your children well, so they will respond even more positively than I did--I'm confident they're much nicer people!]

The lower your budgetary requirements are the longer you can survive on your emergency money. That lowers the stress on DH, which (IMO) often makes a job applicant more confident and more employable.

Good Luck!
HopeToGolf
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by HopeToGolf »

Relax.

It may not seem that way but it sounds like you and your family are well prepared for this. Immediately figure out what expenses can be cut and how long the emergency funds will last (assuming you only make $800). Set the plan into motion and have your husband take a week off to get mentally prepared for the job search and figure out what he wants to do next.

Are you sure you cannot call the camp and tell them about your situation and get a refund. This is a difficult decision but if you are this worried with an emergency fund in place and $40K intended to pay off a mortgage, you need to consider pulling out the kids from camp. Both DW and I work full time and our child is young and will be at camp. With all due respect, if this situation makes you this uneasy, your 12 and 14 year olds can skip camp and spend more time with the unemployed parent and part-time parent for the summer. When you are at work and your husband has an interview, they need to be trusted not to get into trouble.

Again, if your family is concerned, it is all hands on deck, including the kids. I'm sure they do not want to hang out with Mom and Dad for the summer but this is life and could represent a wonderful opportunity for you all.
lululu
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by lululu »

Calm Man wrote: Religious? What religion would place a man's needs over a woman's needs. These are excuses. I am a moderate male who thinks women are equal to men...
Orthodox Judaism. Fundamental and even some mainstream Protestant churches. The Catholic church. Fundamental Islam. I could probably add more, but those are the only religions I know anything about.
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Nyc1967
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Nyc1967 »

My husband will be trying to get some work off the books while collecting unemployment. He went out as a delivery guy last night.

We just called cable and shut it off in all the bedrooms - the kids are great about it. I am not going to cancel camp because they truly love it - and I rather them be busy not worrying too much about adult stuff - it is paid for and it is all day from 8-4 they deserve to enjoy the summer.

Our mortgage payment is 1450.00 a month so that I will take from the 40,0000. We have about another 20,000 in addition to that. We owe about 38,000 on our mortgage - so another option is to withdraw the 38,000 from the heloc and pay off the mortgage then pay the heloc back - rate is prime plus 0


We could "survive" on about 2500 a month if need be besides the mortgage payment -

I have not received anything officially in the mail yet from the company about benefits ending yet so we r just sitting tight
nukewerker
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by nukewerker »

Start applying for new jobs now. Those things can take months to get off the ground depending on what you are applying for. Even if he gets his job back the worse that could happen is he finds a new better job.
Professor Emeritus
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Professor Emeritus »

[quote="Nyc1967"

Our mortgage payment is 1450.00 a month so that I will take from the 40,0000. We have about another 20,000 in addition to that. We owe about 38,000 on our mortgage - so another option is to withdraw the 38,000 from the heloc and pay off the mortgage then pay the heloc back - rate is prime plus 0


We could "survive" on about 2500 a month if need be besides the mortgage payment -

[/quote]

Don't don't don't, at least without legal advice

HELOCs often have a change in circumstances clause that allows them to accelerate the entire loan balance
(no idea on NY law)
WorkToLive
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by WorkToLive »

It sounds like you are working to identify priorities, increase income, and keep expenses low. Those are great steps. The only thing that concerns me is your comment that the kids "deserve a good summer." Actually, they don't. You and your husband may want them to have a good summer, decided that the cost is in line with your priorities, and send them, all of which is fine and dandy, but it's not because they deserve it. Knowing that will help keep you on a good financial path where your spending is deliberate and controlled.
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Gambler
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Gambler »

cobra vs aca

it's almost june. I'm assuming you hit your deductible?

will going on ACA reset the deductibe to $0? and aca usually have a higher deductible threshhold
"Always be thankful for what you have no matter how much or how little" -EternalOptimist
Calm Man
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Re: Husband just lost job

Post by Calm Man »

lululu wrote:
Calm Man wrote: Religious? What religion would place a man's needs over a woman's needs. These are excuses. I am a moderate male who thinks women are equal to men...
Orthodox Judaism. Fundamental and even some mainstream Protestant churches. The Catholic church. Fundamental Islam. I could probably add more, but those are the only religions I know anything about.
I have to enlighten you. I live in the Metropolitan NY area. I know women who are Orthodox Jews and Protestants and Catholics who are quite accomplished in life as opposed to being subservient to a man. Religions are flexible and big tents. I do not know why one would want to be part of an organization that makes her subservient. If you want to be, good luck to you, but a a society, this is not good.
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