investingdad wrote:etowers wrote:Professor Emeritus wrote:Would never claim I was wealthy but
1) marry the right partner
2) Live in the same house for 34 years
3) work very hard at your profession
4) live below your means and save prodigiously
5) never listen to or pay a dime to a broker or other thief
I don't really understand how you can choose 1) as an active step to building wealth. It seems to me more like the luck of the draw if you get someone with similar financial goals. I don't see how it is actionable to "choose" your life partner as a means of building wealth, as opposed to deciding how much to save every month.
Of you course you can choose #1, why couldn't you? Let's spin it another way, let's say you meet somebody and find out a few months in they have a heroin habit. Do you say, "Well, it's outside my control to choose to be with this person so I guess I'm getting engaged to a heroin addict."? Of course you have a choice. I would say, "See you...I don't need your problems to become my problems."
You know going in whether the person is on the same general page as you...if you choose to stay on with a person that doesn't have similar life goals, it has nothing to do with luck and everything to do with you making the decision.
Read the prenup thread. I am not the only person who was told by their partner that they shared similar financial goals, only to find out that wasn't true after the marriage. I dated my first wife for three years and we together mapped out our financial future well before tying the knot; when it came to actually doing it, that was a different story. My net worth went backwards during our 4yr marriage, thanks to what I thought was at the time a good a 6-figure investment in her education (and supporting a full-time student, non-working, partner). You do not necessarily know if that person is on the same page as you, until you actually try it. If that was the case for you, congrats.