Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

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Greentree
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Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Greentree » Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:06 pm

For those who paid off their mortgage, did you tell anyone besides a significant other?
Parents? Friends who asked about your mortgage? Use it for a negotiation at work?

Just curious to hear others experience. We haven't told anyone except the thousands on this message board. :happy

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Boglenaut
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Boglenaut » Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:12 pm

We paid cash. I mentioned it to Bogleheads, but generally only a few people know.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by flyingaway » Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:13 pm

If asked, I would tell them the truth. Nobody has asked me about my mortgage yet.

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LH
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by LH » Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:18 pm

I would not generally tell people.

Lots of people are struggling.

It's good, it's something to be proud of, but not something to share per se, I would shy away from sharing.

In terms if work negotiations, I think ability to leave comes out quite well. Mortgage being zero is a factor. But the employer doesn't care, it's basically just ability to leave regardless of reason.

I mean if appro of nothing, someone told me my mortgage is paid off, I would likely be put off.

Note I have not paid off mortgage, but could if I desired, it's just a question of leverage one inflation hedged. But I have reached other milestones, I do not tell people those.

If someone asks, I may say it, and if they likely have MORE net worth than me, I would be more likely to share, with the more being directly proportional to the more : )

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by NAVigator » Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:40 pm

No one asked. Didn't tell anyone. I congratulated the guy I see in the mirror every morning. He was a lot younger when I paid off the mortgage in less than 8 years.

There sure are a lot of folks that want to help you. Just in the mail today, I received an offer to attended some meeting about hearing aids, another dinner offer from someone with retirement "strategies", and some information about the importance of medical checkups for your heart or something. No one asked about a mortgage. But then, I haven't checked the email spam folder yet.
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Marmot
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No

Post by Marmot » Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:42 pm

I agree with the person who replied earlier, no one asked.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by jfn111 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:53 pm

We decided it was an excuse for a party. We held a friends and neighbors mortgage burning party. We got a few of the "your so lucky" comments but about half the people there had paid off mortgages. (We were 55 and we weren't the youngest there with a paid off mortgage.)

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by nisiprius » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:02 pm

You bet. I won't say we volunteer the information, but we certainly take the opportunity to mention it and, uh, brag about it if any reasonable conversational opportunity presents itself. And the note, stamped "paid," is in a frame hanging on our wall... not in a conspicuous place, but not an inconspicuous place, either.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Spirit Rider » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:06 pm

I would recommend a very select few in confidence. Just like I don't divulge my retirement and taxable account balances to anyone.

Personal experience has shown me that people can be very envious of other's wealth. Sadly it is not those with lower incomes who manage to make do, rather it is those with higher incomes and spendthrift ways.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by John3754 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:12 pm

I was having a conversation with a close older relative recently, we were discussing our future plans (his retirement, and the 5 year plan that DW and I are working on). I mentioned that we're considering building a small house in a few years, my relative said something about saving for a down payment and I said that we'd actually pay for the house in full. The conversation got very quiet, it was a little awkward.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by bhsince87 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:13 pm

I did a facebook post declaring "WOO HOO, WE'RE DEBT FREE AT LAST!" I got the most likes and congratulations ever on that one. And quite a few "BTDT, it feels great! "
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by peregrine » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:15 pm

Not generally. We did tell a few close family members. I did tell my boss who said he was only a few years from paying his off. I only told my boss so that he would not be shocked when I decide to retire since I will retire early. Since then I have found out my boss is looking for another position and may be gone before I am. In general, I think such an announcement could incite jealousy and might not be helpful.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Clark & Addison » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:23 pm

We told our families. They all knew from previous conversations that we were working on paying off our mortgage. Other than family, there have been a few close friends that know our spending habits and that we sometimes have financial discussions with that know we are mortgage-free, but we don't go around offering up that information just to do so.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:23 pm

Lots of people are struggling. +1
People can be envious, especially when money is involved. +1
Make sure your circle of those in the "know" remains very small - tell your wife/significant other, and your parents if they are of like-mind (you never know these days). Do or don't tell your siblings - people can be envious, especially when money is involved; and especially when family is involved.

Be humble, if you aren't disclosing your 401k balance, IRA balance, savings account totals, the amount of your income or total portfolio, why would you reveal this? See point 1 above - lots of people are struggling.

Someone once asked me how I was doing, I responded that I'm doing well - wrong answer!, see point 1 above - even though I meant it in the context of doing okay: not like I was jetting off to Tahiti for vacation annually or anything like that, they'd rather hear that you are struggling to stay above water. :oops:

BTW, I haven't paid mine off yet, I place a higher value on liquidity at the present moment.
Last edited by Grt2bOutdoors on Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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tyrion
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by tyrion » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:24 pm

nisiprius wrote: And the note, stamped "paid," is in a frame hanging on our wall... not in a conspicuous place, but not an inconspicuous place, either.


This is what I would like to do when the time comes. If friends/relatives happen to notice it and want to discuss, then that's a conversation I would be happy to have. If they're jealous, they can keep that to themselves. We happen to have a modest house, especially compared to our friend/peer group, so it would make sense that we might pay off our mortgage before others.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Jack FFR1846 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:25 pm

I think I told my parents.

I was 44 when we paid it off. Today (13 years later), we still have friends refinancing because they have expenses they can't pay and I expect they will never be without a mortgage. We have not told them a thing.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:29 pm

Jack FFR1846 wrote:I think I told my parents.

I was 44 when we paid it off. Today (13 years later), we still have friends refinancing because they have expenses they can't pay and I expect they will never be without a mortgage. We have not told them a thing.


Smart guy! +1
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by goodenyou » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:29 pm

Don't ask. Don't tell. It is ostentatious and braggadocious to tell someone you have paid off your mortgage unless the question is asked. In the context of financial planning and advice, it may be appropriate.
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nisiprius
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by nisiprius » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:30 pm

Grt2bOutdoors wrote:Lots of people are struggling. +1
People can be envious, especially when money is involved. +1
Make sure your circle of those in the "know" remains very small - tell your wife/significant other, and your parents if they are of like-mind (you never know these days). Do or don't tell your siblings - people can be envious, especially when money is involved; and especially when family is involved.

Be humble, if you aren't disclosing your 401k balance, IRA balance, savings account totals, the amount of your income or total portfolio, why would you reveal this? See point 1 above - lots of people are struggling.

BTW, I haven't paid mine off yet, I place a higher value on liquidity at the present moment.
I hadn't thought of it that way. I may need to re-think. I'd just thought of it as an aspirational goal that everybody expected to achieve--like retirement. Not a statement of wealth, just a rite of passage. Maybe fewer people expect to pay their houses off than used to be the case.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by epilnk » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:35 pm

I told my husband. He earned the money so I figured he had the right to know.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by abuss368 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:38 pm

jfn111 wrote:We decided it was an excuse for a party. We held a friends and neighbors mortgage burning party. We got a few of the "your so lucky" comments but about half the people there had paid off mortgages. (We were 55 and we weren't the youngest there with a paid off mortgage.)


Are you serious?
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by bhsince87 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:39 pm

Keep in mind it's usually a matter of public record, and pretty easy to find on line today.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by abuss368 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:41 pm

We rented a billboard, put leaflets on the cars in town, and also paid for airtime.

No I would not mention it to most, if any folks. A lot of people are struggling. I also would not want the exposure.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Midwest Dave » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:50 pm

Paid of at age 39.
No announcement, but shared with family and friends in regards to financial planning discussions.
I think it is important for interested people to know that it is possible to achieve, without giant incomes, and to understand the benefits of doing so.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by gerrym51 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:52 pm

If they ask we tell. we paid off our mortgage 10 years before retireing. Not bad for 2nd marriage(me) third for her(don't tell her i told you).25 years together(I outlasted her other 2 combined) :mrgreen:

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by vectorizer » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:52 pm

Guess I'm an outlier, I posted on Facebook (to only my FB "friends") with a picture of the mortage satisfaction paragraph, labeled "debt-free for the first time since 1974". Didn't occur to me that anyone would consider it bragging, just seemed like a life milestone that I would normally share with friends like babies born and kids graduating. After seeing most of these posts, now I wonder if it was the right thing to do.

[BTW, the first debt in '74 was for a reel-to-reel tape recorder (for which I'm not proud), then it was college loans, then mortgages.]

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:55 pm

nisiprius wrote:
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:Lots of people are struggling. +1
People can be envious, especially when money is involved. +1
Make sure your circle of those in the "know" remains very small - tell your wife/significant other, and your parents if they are of like-mind (you never know these days). Do or don't tell your siblings - people can be envious, especially when money is involved; and especially when family is involved.

Be humble, if you aren't disclosing your 401k balance, IRA balance, savings account totals, the amount of your income or total portfolio, why would you reveal this? See point 1 above - lots of people are struggling.

BTW, I haven't paid mine off yet, I place a higher value on liquidity at the present moment.
I hadn't thought of it that way. I may need to re-think. I'd just thought of it as an aspirational goal that everybody expected to achieve--like retirement. Not a statement of wealth, just a rite of passage. Maybe fewer people expect to pay their houses off than used to be the case.


I like your idea of hanging up a copy of the paid note. Really, I do! :) My problem would be 3 out of 5 close friends are financially struggling and while I may not be intending to showcase my accomplishment much like my hanging diplomas are, I can see how they may feel if they were to see it. And then, I have siblings, one has made a rash of bad financial decisions (didn't take my advice but that is a topic for another day) so I can see the friction coming and the other is a ways from paying theirs off. I haven't paid mine off just yet due to the importance of liquidity, but I feel alot better knowing I could technically take it out within months if I chose too. Many folks don't have that option.

Of the relatives/friends who have paid theirs off - they haven't blantantly advertised their accomplishment, but when they go from driving a very old used car to driving "new" used vehicles, buying expensive bling and going on vacations three times a year you kind of figure it out (and it's not due to job promotions or windfalls). Still, I'm happy for their accomplishments. :sharebeer
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by bhsince87 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:59 pm

As for the party thing, I remember going to my Aunt and Uncle’s “Mortgage Burning Party” back around 1983.

They were both teachers, and many of their coworkers and neighbors attended, along with the extended family.

A great time was had by all, as far as I could tell. I remember tears of joy as well, which I couldn't quite relate to at the time.

They literally burned the note in their fireplace!
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by vectorizer » Wed Apr 30, 2014 1:59 pm

Grt2bOutdoors wrote:Of the relatives/friends who have paid theirs off - they haven't blantantly advertised their accomplishment, but when they go from driving a very old used car to driving "new" used vehicles, buying expensive bling and going on vacations three times a year you kind of figure it out (and it's not due to job promotions or windfalls).

THAT never occured to me either ... we use the former mortgage payments to buy monthly I Bonds. Gee wiz, we're boring.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:02 pm

bhsince87 wrote:Keep in mind it's usually a matter of public record, and pretty easy to find on line today.


Don't know about you, but I feel a broad sense of satisfaction and accomplishment when I pay it off due to my efforts as opposed to having received a windfall/inheritance or mommy/daddy gave you the money to pay it off. Seeing it as a matter of public record isn't quite the same as knowing the actual reason of why or how it was paid off.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by nwbum » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:05 pm

Other than my wife, no.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by surfstar » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:05 pm

I've never made a mortgage payment, nor car payment. I figured I shouldn't start a new thread to tell people about my accomplishment, so I posted here.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:12 pm

vectorizer wrote:
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:Of the relatives/friends who have paid theirs off - they haven't blantantly advertised their accomplishment, but when they go from driving a very old used car to driving "new" used vehicles, buying expensive bling and going on vacations three times a year you kind of figure it out (and it's not due to job promotions or windfalls).

THAT never occured to me either ... we use the former mortgage payments to buy monthly I Bonds. Gee wiz, we're boring.


That's a pretty small mortgage you've got there.....
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by HomerJ » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:22 pm

Most of our friends and neighbors know because when my wife retired last year, quite a few people asked how we could afford having her quit... I told them truthfully that we had made a deal that once the house was paid off she could quit the job she hated.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by chaz » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:23 pm

Just DW.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by harikaried » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:25 pm

abuss368 wrote:We rented a billboard, put leaflets on the cars in town, and also paid for airtime.
Gotta do something with that money not going towards a mortgage. :D

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by bloom2708 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:37 pm

It is interesting that most people love to hear about your struggles, foibles, missteps, etc.

But I only talked about the paid of mortgage with a few trusted friends of like financial persuasion who were working for the same goals.

I have friends from 1st grade that I wouldn't tell. They don't save a penny, have debt up to their eyeballs and live like they will die tomorrow.

They have no interest in hearing about my paid off mortgage. That is fine.
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Dutch
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Dutch » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:43 pm

What on earth could be gained by telling people? :confused

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by nisiprius » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:47 pm

Well, I guess times have changed. I honestly had not thought either that mentioning a paid-up mortgage was an ostentatious flaunting of wealth, or that it wasn't assumed to be within every homeowner's reach, given only sufficient time. I guess I need to be aware that even seven years after the subprime crisis there are many people who feel their homes are at risk and hanging by a thread. I will be more reticent in future.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by danwhite77 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:48 pm

My situation is a somewhat unique so I thought I'd add my story. As with many commenters here I have not told anyone absent specific questions such as "What did you do for your mortgage?" or something similar. I don't want to lie, so I'm truthful, but I don't volunteer the information except in very rare instances.

The unique aspect of my situation is that my wife and I paid cash for our house and the lawyer representing the sellers was the next door neighbor of the sellers (and now us)! He, of course, knew the deal was cash. He's a friend and a neighbor now, and I doubt he's ever told anyone else about it, but my experience shows that in some situations it's literally impossible to keep this fact a secret.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by Greentree » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:53 pm

Lots of great answers. I can see both sides but most of them have confirmed that it is better to keep it quiet.

Dutch wrote:What on earth could be gained by telling people? :confused


I greatly appreciate two mentors at work that after a while, had told me in a hushed voice that they had paid it off and the benefits. I had never really considered it before then and that was when I started reading more. I think they knew we had the same financial mindset through some conversations about money, as some others have said. That is one benefit, to help others. But the key difference seems that it is not a good idea to tell anyone who wouldn't be interested, which is almost everyone.

The other benefit is that its nice to tell someone about a hard earned accomplishment. Just like you finished running a race, got a promotion, etc. But I can see how it could come across more as bragging.

Definitely not telling the siblings.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by barnaclebob » Wed Apr 30, 2014 3:01 pm

A guy at work took the group to lunch when he paid his off. This guy also has a "guy" at Edward Jones who always beats the market...

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We increased our mortgage.

Post by Taylor Larimore » Wed Apr 30, 2014 3:11 pm

Greentree:

We never paid-off our mortgage. We increased it. We decided to give our heirs cash now, instead of home equity after we're gone (our heirs were delighted). :happy

Best wishes.
Taylor
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Re: We increased our mortgage.

Post by abuss368 » Wed Apr 30, 2014 3:16 pm

Taylor Larimore wrote:Greentree:

We never paid-off our mortgage. We increased it. We decided to give our heirs cash now, instead of home equity after we're gone (our heirs were delighted). :happy

Best wishes.
Taylor


Hi Taylor,

That is an interesting perspective.

Thanks.
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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by rixer » Wed Apr 30, 2014 3:17 pm

Yes, I did. At the time, I was excited, proud, felt good about it and wanted to share with the people I knew. Now I never mention it.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by tyrion » Wed Apr 30, 2014 3:26 pm

Dutch wrote:What on earth could be gained by telling people? :confused


It might motivate some people to think about their financial goals? Now I'm not sure I would do it if we didn't own the most modest house in our peer group. And I wouldn't go out of our way to mention it to someone who had fallen on hard times.

But for those people who earn twice as much as we do but choose to spend it on X activity and Y late model luxury sedan, then yeah... I have no problem with them knowing we prioritized buying a reasonable house and paying it off in a reasonable amount of time.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by BHCadet » Wed Apr 30, 2014 3:40 pm

Yes, we did...
But, only if asked.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by WorkToLive » Wed Apr 30, 2014 3:46 pm

My husband and I told my parents and our daughter, and I told two of my very close friends. I hosted a small party with the five of us (filet Mignon, nice wine, etc.) at our house to celebrate. We have not told our siblings or any of my in-laws, nor do we plan to. I've never been asked, but I suppose I would say it's paid off if someone ever asked me directly.

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Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by nervousnovice » Wed Apr 30, 2014 3:57 pm

Clark & Addison wrote:We told our families. They all knew from previous conversations that we were working on paying off our mortgage. Other than family, there have been a few close friends that know our spending habits and that we sometimes have financial discussions with that know we are mortgage-free, but we don't go around offering up that information just to do so.


+1....i try to be mindful of the economic difficulties many people have today and feel grateful for our situation.

ajcp
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Joined: Fri Dec 13, 2013 6:44 pm

Re: Did you tell anyone you paid off your mortgage?

Post by ajcp » Wed Apr 30, 2014 4:03 pm

Greentree wrote:Use it for a negotiation at work?


I don't understand what this means.

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