Girls Soccer

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roadking2615
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Girls Soccer

Post by roadking2615 » Wed Sep 07, 2011 10:02 pm

My daughter, who is 7 yrs. old, plays on a local girls soccer team with other girls her age. She's a reasonably good player - not the best, but not her first time to play either.

Recently, while watching her practice and play in games, I've noticed kind of a lackadaisical (sp?) attitude and timidness in her playing. It often times manifests itself in walking the field instead of running, and a request to the coach to sit on the bench rather than getting out on the field and playing. I don't expect her to be aggressive or even score any goals - just make an effort and play her best.

I mentioned the situation to my wife. She decided to attend the next soccer practice to see what was going on, and try to understand why my daughter wasn't playing as well as we both know she capable of. After watching my daughter's soccer practice tonight and talking to her afterwards, my wife came home to give me the full story.

Seems that another little girl on the soccer team, who tends to be one of the better players, can be rather vocal (i.e. bossy) and mean to her own teammates. In fact, a couple of other little girls were talking about how mean she was during a water break. This kind of causes my daughter to play timidly for fear of failure and incurring the wrath of Little Miss Soccer Player. My daughter would rather just sit out and not play, rather than make a mistake and get called out for it.

My wife and I are friends with Little Miss Soccer player's parents, but I don't know that talking to them would do any good, and I doubt it would be welcomed feedback. I suppose the best route would be to go to the coach (nuetral party) and explain to him the situation. He might be able to pull Little Miss Soccer player aside and explain to her that her 'meanness' is poisoning the team and turning her teammates against her.

Anyhow, I just wanted to know if any other Bogglehead's had a similar experience with their own kids or even yourself when playing sports as a kid, and how you handled. I wish I could simply tell my daughter to ignore her teammate and just play her game, but obviously it's not that easy for a 7 yr. old.

Also, please don't think I'm here to bash Little Miss Soccer player either. I recognize she's just 7 yrs. old as well, and her lashing out at teammates at this time is due to lack of maturity and emotional self-control. It's just kids being kids.

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MekongTrader
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Post by MekongTrader » Wed Sep 07, 2011 10:24 pm

I think that the right person to talk to is the coach. If he is a good coach he should have observed by now that Miss Little Soccer Player's behavour isn't good for the team spirit and performance.

Talking to her parents may be sensitive.

Also, can't blame Miss Little Soccer Player. She may just be overly motivated... and at 7-year olds still have to learn about how proper teams function, etc.

It's really the coach who needs to sort this out.

How about the other team mates? Do any of them feel like your daughter? If yes, you may want to have another parent join you when talking to the coach.

Good luck!
MT

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ladders11
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Re: Girls Soccer

Post by ladders11 » Wed Sep 07, 2011 11:11 pm

jenny345 wrote: I'd do just that. Unless your daughter is being bullied, singled out or physically threatened, if it were me I would not say anything to the coach or the other girl's parents. In my experience, there are usually almost always one or two kids like that on every team. Instead of trying to stop their behavior, I think you will get better long term results by working with your daughter to make her less sensitive to their comments. I would view this as an opportunity to build up your daughter's life skills.
+1 There is always a kid like that. In sports or even in school gym class. Age 7 or 17.

Kids need confidence to have fun playing sports. This can come from praise, but also from instruction and practice. IF they want to be better at their sport, make sure they have access to good instruction and a place to practice and people to practice with. I seem to remember being implored to try my best and run hard and so forth but this is vague advice.

She also may not like soccer.

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Re: Girls Soccer

Post by MekongTrader » Thu Sep 08, 2011 12:05 am

ladders11 wrote:
jenny345 wrote: I'd do just that. Unless your daughter is being bullied, singled out or physically threatened, if it were me I would not say anything to the coach or the other girl's parents. In my experience, there are usually almost always one or two kids like that on every team. Instead of trying to stop their behavior, I think you will get better long term results by working with your daughter to make her less sensitive to their comments. I would view this as an opportunity to build up your daughter's life skills.
+1 There is always a kid like that. In sports or even in school gym class. Age 7 or 17.

Kids need confidence to have fun playing sports. This can come from praise, but also from instruction and practice. IF they want to be better at their sport, make sure they have access to good instruction and a place to practice and people to practice with. I seem to remember being implored to try my best and run hard and so forth but this is vague advice.

She also may not like soccer.
Jenny and ladders do have a point. It may be good to have the girl arrange herself with the situation (with help from the parents) and take this opportunity for her to start developing skills for how to be a member of a team and deal with related problems.

Immediately going to the coach, as I had suggested earlier, may not be so good after all. Later on in life, the girl will face similar situations over and over again and as such developing the necessary skills is very important.

MT

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Post by livesoft » Thu Sep 08, 2011 5:37 am

Real life sucks, too. You will not have to wait long until your daughter comes in contact with other people like this: a teacher, a coach, a boss, etc. How are you going to help her get practice for her life?
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Post by HardKnocker » Thu Sep 08, 2011 6:28 am

Youth sports suck.
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Oneanddone
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Post by Oneanddone » Thu Sep 08, 2011 6:54 am

I also have a 7 year old daughter who plays soccer. A big part of the issue is probably simply that she is 7.

As parents, we want our kids to go and put out their best effort to win and play hard. We don't care about the results, but we care about the effort.

However, from the perspective of the 7 year old kid, she doesn't care about playing hard and winning. She just wants to have fun. If it isn't fun, she has no reason to want to play. Sitting out can be fun, too. It is a chance to sit around and giggle with her friends.

By the way, it is easy to be critical of this "bossy" teammate, but what about the gossipy behavior of the other girls on the team?

In my opinion, you have no business getting involved in the situation until after your daughter stands up for herself and says something to the bossy teammate. You may be surprised that your daughter doing something as straightforward as saying, "Hey, Mary, I want you to stop being so bossy. I'm doing the best that I can." may completely solve the issue.

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Post by kiligi » Thu Sep 08, 2011 6:59 am

Why not let the coach handle whether he/she needs to speak with your daughter about her participation (or lack thereof) on the field?

Our daughters have been doing team sports for years and years and years. My youngest (in 1st grade) is in her 4th year of team soccer - yes, soccer is very big where we live.

One of the first things that we are told (as parents) is to be supportive and encouraging of the player's efforts on the field, but not to try to tell our children what to do on the field - that is the coach's job.

If the coach thinks there is a problem with your daughter walking the field as opposed to running it - he/she will talk to you daughter. If not, my suggestion is to let it go. Your daughter has chosen how she wants to respond to the "bully". Now it is time to see if her response has the result she is hoping for.

With team sports, sometimes you will get a great team that works well together. Sometimes you will get a great coach. Sometimes you won't. And learning different strategies for dealing with different situations is really important.

It can be difficult to let your daughter's "less than par" performance go without wanting to comment on it. But that really isn't your place in this situation.

I have a daughter who can either be Pele or No Play depending on what kind of coach she has. I used to get really tense watching her practices, as with a not great coach she spent most of her time twirling around a corner of the field and picking dandelions. My blood would boil! But, I tried to remember that children are learning all sorts of lessons on the field, and as long as the coach wasn't actively terrible - to let the coaches handle it. That season was less than stellar. The team didn't win very many games. But, she could still play like no one's business the next season and that season she had an excellent coach. As she has gotten older, she chooses her Pele side more often than her No Play side, because she loves to play soccer. And I have learned to let these things go, because it shouldn't matter so much to me whether my child chooses to play well or play poorly in a soccer match. It is a game, for goodness sakes!

If I were you, I would watch from the sidelines but not make a big deal about this situation. I would also praise her efforts when she does engage in the game, rather than look for reasons when she disengages.

Good luck.

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Post by TomatoTomahto » Thu Sep 08, 2011 7:42 am

In my case, the sport is ice hockey, so perhaps the rules are different (and especially so since the kids are young), but a parent is explicitly prohibited from saying anything to the coach(es) other than "good morning" or "great game." If we feel the need to discuss something, we wait at least 24 hours after the game, and then discuss it with the team manager. The team manager will decide how best to go forward, which might or might not include a meeting with the coach(es).

There will always be jerky kids on teams. As the kids get older, they will begin to "self police." It gets better, in my experience, at around age 13 or 14.

The best thing you can do for your daughter is to give her skills to cope with a disagreeable teammate, and to let her know that you're interested in effort and enjoyment, not results. You want her to be better this month than last month, and you want her to enjoy the sport. I told my kids that usually, if you dug deep enough, most know-it-all and negative kids had something in their lives that wasn't working for them, and that while you shouldn't accept their behavior or internalize their opinions, you had to somewhat feel sorry for them.

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Post by Lente » Thu Sep 08, 2011 8:22 am

I find it interesting that we've generally accepted 'there will be mean people' as a norm, and that the consensus reaction is to 'deal with it' instead of addressing the issue in some way. I wonder if 10/20/50 years ago a parent saw another child doing something inappropriate if they would say something to the child/child's parent or not. I don't mean to suggest a best or worst way to deal with it (I have no children, nor deal with younger people on a regular basis) but this is just an observation. I sometimes feel as a society our ability to interact in a socially healthy way is deteriorating.

roadking2615
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Post by roadking2615 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 8:27 am

Thanks everyone for weighing in. I appreciate the sage advice. Yes, I will probably approach it as one of life's lessons and help my daughter develop the tools/skills to work through it. There will always be situations in life where there are difficult people to deal with whether in sports, work or life in general. Thanks again.

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Post by NoVa Lurker » Thu Sep 08, 2011 8:48 am

Lente wrote:I find it interesting that we've generally accepted 'there will be mean people' as a norm, and that the consensus reaction is to 'deal with it' instead of addressing the issue in some way. I wonder if 10/20/50 years ago a parent saw another child doing something inappropriate if they would say something to the child/child's parent or not. I don't mean to suggest a best or worst way to deal with it (I have no children, nor deal with younger people on a regular basis) but this is just an observation. I sometimes feel as a society our ability to interact in a socially healthy way is deteriorating.
What people are saying is that you need to teach your children to deal with the mean kids directly, rather than, as a parent, approaching the parents/coach.

I think you are misreading the advice if you think anyone is saying "deal with it" in the sense of "don't address it in any way."

In my view, this is great advice in theory, but it might not work with every seven year old. If you have a kid that is non-confrontational by nature, it is tough to change that at any age - and if your kid is nice and awesome and doing well in general, I'm not sure you'd want to get them to be more confrontational, even if it might be useful on the soccer field.

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Post by TomatoTomahto » Thu Sep 08, 2011 9:15 am

NoVa Lurker wrote:If you have a kid that is non-confrontational by nature, it is tough to change that at any age - and if your kid is nice and awesome and doing well in general, I'm not sure you'd want to get them to be more confrontational, even if it might be useful on the soccer field.
To quote one of my kids' coaches: "I can always toughen up a kid a little if they're a mite thin-skinned, but I can't make a nice kid out of a nasty one."

Remember too, at 7 many kids don't have a sense that it's more important to win and excel than it is to get along with others. Perhaps they're not so childish :)

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Post by HomerJ » Thu Sep 08, 2011 9:21 am

Oneanddone wrote:Sitting out can be fun, too. It is a chance to sit around and giggle with her friends.
Heh, my daughter loved softball because when it was their turn at bat, she and the other girls would do cheers for whoever was batting...

When she was out in the outfield, she would do handstands or pick at the grass because she was so bored... :)

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Post by TomatoTomahto » Thu Sep 08, 2011 9:26 am

rrosenkoetter wrote:When she was out in the outfield, she would do handstands or pick at the grass because she was so bored... :)
I have video somewhere of my son doing the macarena during a soccer game :)

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greg24
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Post by greg24 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 9:28 am

Seven year olds not giving 100% in soccer? We're talking about practice. Practice, man, we're talking about _practice_. Seven year old girl's soccer practice.

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Post by marco100 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:10 am

Anyhow, I just wanted to know if any other Bogglehead's had a similar experience with their own kids or even yourself when playing sports as a kid, and how you handled. I wish I could simply tell my daughter to ignore her teammate and just play her game, but obviously it's not that easy for a 7 yr. old.
We tended to avoid and ostracize all adults and the purpose of recreational activities when I was a kid was to get away from adults.

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Post by marco100 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:15 am

Seems that another little girl on the soccer team, who tends to be one of the better players, can be rather vocal (i.e. bossy) and mean to her own teammates. In fact, a couple of other little girls were talking about how mean she was during a water break. This kind of causes my daughter to play timidly for fear of failure and incurring the wrath of Little Miss Soccer Player. My daughter would rather just sit out and not play, rather than make a mistake and get called out for it.
The so-called "bossy child" is actually trying to express leadership traits and should not be discouraged from doing so.

You yourself basically have said your daughter is a little bit lazy or unmotivated on the soccer field.

You are actually sending mixed messages to your daughter about achievement. On the one hand you have been critical about her for her lack of drive on the soccer field, on the other hand, you object to the behavior shown by another player who exemplifies exactly the kind of leadership and drive that your own child lacks.

Before you do anything with respect to your child's participation in this sports situation you need to carefully examine your own motivations and reasoning about all of this.

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Post by TomatoTomahto » Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:27 am

marco100 wrote:The so-called "bossy child" is actually trying to express leadership traits and should not be discouraged from doing so.
I wasn't at any of the games, and neither were you, so we have to take OP's description as accurate. I question whether "bossy" and "mean" behavior is an expression of leadership traits.

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Post by kiligi » Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:49 am

Claude wrote:
marco100 wrote:The so-called "bossy child" is actually trying to express leadership traits and should not be discouraged from doing so.
I wasn't at any of the games, and neither were you, so we have to take OP's description as accurate. I question whether "bossy" and "mean" behavior is an expression of leadership traits.
While I try to subscribe to a "believe the best you can about the OP and the OP's perception", I also think that sometimes what we perceive and what others might perceive from the same information can be different.

Offering the idea that perhaps the other girl's behavior might not be bullying as much as it might be competitiveness/sporty-ness is something that I think can be important in this case. We are talking about 7 year olds here. The very good player who is very competitive is learning lessons here as well. They are learning about how to deal (gracefully it is to be hoped) with less competitive and less athletic teammates. They too will make mistakes and missteps during this learning process.

I still think that the coach should be expected to deal with this and most parents need to butt out unless something egregious is happening (which doesn't seem to be the case here as described by the OP).

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Post by marco100 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:51 am

Claude wrote:
marco100 wrote:The so-called "bossy child" is actually trying to express leadership traits and should not be discouraged from doing so.
I wasn't at any of the games, and neither were you, so we have to take OP's description as accurate. I question whether "bossy" and "mean" behavior is an expression of leadership traits.
Often times women (or in this case girls) who are in positions of leadership are called "bossy" and "mean" if they engage in behavior which, if displayed by a male in the same scenario, would not be characterized negatively, but positively.

The fact of the matter is that OP himself describes his child as being rather unmotivated on the soccer field. That's fine for a seven year old but you can't have it both ways. You can't criticize your own child for being unmotivated yet criticize the other player for being strongly motivated. It's illogical and inconsistent.

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Post by Random Musings » Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:51 am

To the OP:

Do the parents exhibit the same type of traits that their daughter exhibits?

RM

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Post by marco100 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:56 am

Offering the idea that perhaps the other girl's behavior might not be bullying as much as it might be competitiveness/sporty-ness is something that I think can be important in this case.
There are basically two roads one can travel down with these youth sports leagues IMO.

Your child can be in it for "funsies" (which I think is fine) or in it to "win it", try to follow the ladder up through travel leagues and so forth.

Either you want your child to learn to be competitive or not, either way is fine, but you have to decide which way it's going to be one way or the other.

If the notion is that OP is thinking about actively intervening with the coach then he would be well-advised to really think about why he wants to do that and the end result that he is trying to accomplish.

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Post by marco100 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 11:00 am

Claude wrote:
marco100 wrote:The so-called "bossy child" is actually trying to express leadership traits and should not be discouraged from doing so.
I wasn't at any of the games, and neither were you, so we have to take OP's description as accurate. I question whether "bossy" and "mean" behavior is an expression of leadership traits.
It's not an objective description of what actually occurred, it's a totally subjective characterization in which the OP attributes personality attributes to the other child and we have no idea to what extent that attribution is reasonable or to what extent it may be colored by OP's bias in favor of his own child.

Obviously, don't you think?

Also, have you never heard football coaches or quarterbacks (the "leadership" positions on a football team) raise their voices, be "bossy" or "mean", etc., when someone makes a mistake?

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Post by marylandcrab » Thu Sep 08, 2011 11:12 am

I have years of experience with girls and sports. When my dd was that age, part of the fun, maybe even a lot of the fun, was sitting on the sidelines giggling, doing hair, singing songs, etc.

Very rarely are 7 yo capable of having the work ethic of running when tired, paying attention when bored, etc.

From a very early age my dd has proven herself to not really have that eye of the tiger competetiveness. And imo, over the years, the worst thing about sports have been the parents.

However, you don't want her being intimidated by other 7 yo's who get away with bossiness. You'd like to think the coach will handle it, but truth is, the coach is probably someone's dad who is volunteering their time and doing the best they can.

The best thing you can do is encourage your child to do her best, and enjoy being physically active. I doubt it's a requirement at that age to hussle on and off the field. That's a developmental thing that comes later.

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Post by TomatoTomahto » Thu Sep 08, 2011 11:17 am

marco100 wrote:
Claude wrote:
marco100 wrote:The so-called "bossy child" is actually trying to express leadership traits and should not be discouraged from doing so.
I wasn't at any of the games, and neither were you, so we have to take OP's description as accurate. I question whether "bossy" and "mean" behavior is an expression of leadership traits.
It's not an objective description of what actually occurred, it's a totally subjective characterization in which the OP attributes personality attributes to the other child and we have no idea to what extent that attribution is reasonable or to what extent it may be colored by OP's bias in favor of his own child.

Obviously, don't you think?
I absolutely agree, but in the absence of a second observation, we may as well take OP's observations as accurate for our purposes here in a forum.

Additionally, it doesn't differ from my own experience: for every leadership-displaying 7-year old I've seen over the years (I'm 60), I think I've seen a dozen bossy, know-it-all, blame-others kids.

FWIW, the ratio has gotten worse over the years as more and more "organized" sports are played by younger and younger kids and the parents are more and more "involved." Not saying that there's a connection, I'm just sayin' :) Last year my daughter had a team-mate (on a 14 and under hockey team) whose parents told the girl in the presence of parents that she didn't need more coaching, she knew more than the coach about how to play defense. Can you imagine? BTW, FWIW, the girl in question was a great skater, but had no clue about defense and teamwork.

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Post by marco100 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 11:21 am

However, you don't want her being intimidated by other 7 yo's who get away with bossiness.
At the risk of beating a dead horse it's unfair to the other child to characterize her negatively as "bossy."

Most likely she is just frustrated because she can play at a higher skill level and is more competitive than most of the other children on the team.

One of the problems with youth sports today is the somewhat schizophrenic nature of what it seems to be trying to achieve.

Are we trying to teach our children to be competitive and to win?

If not, why do we bother keeping score, having rigid rules, uniforms, adult coaches refs, and all of the other accoutrements of "competitiveness"?

Or are we just trying to teach our kids some physical education skills and social interaction skills?

If we are trying to do both at what point does one set of goals have to yield to the other?

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Post by Slapshot » Thu Sep 08, 2011 11:25 am

I was a high school soccer and hockey coach for 35 years. Like almost every other coach I've ever known, the biggest pain I found in coaching came not from the players but from the parents. The hardest thing for any parent, and I learned this from personal experience, is to keep quiet and let nature take its course. Unless the kid is in physical harm, trust the coach to do the right thing.

When I was growing up, things like this happened all the time. But no parents or coaches were around to know about it because we were out on some field or playground by ourselves. I know it's hard, but your daughter will learn more if you let her handle this herself.
This time, like all times, is the best of times if we but know what to do with it.

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Post by marco100 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 11:28 am

Last year my daughter had a team-mate (on a 14 and under hockey team) whose parents told the girl in the presence of parents that she didn't need more coaching, she knew more than the coach about how to play defense. Can you imagine? BTW, FWIW, the girl in question was a great skater, but had no clue about defense and teamwork.
Most likely since it's girls youth ice hockey they play it as a "non contact" sport which isn't even hockey to begin with.

How good can the girl skate after being dumped on her rear a few times with a few good, hard legal checks?

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Post by marco100 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 11:30 am

Slapshot wrote:I was a high school soccer and hockey coach for 35 years. Like almost every other coach I've ever known, the biggest pain I found in coaching came not from the players but from the parents. The hardest thing for any parent, and I learned this from personal experience, is to keep quiet and let nature take its course. Unless the kid is in physical harm, trust the coach to do the right thing.

When I was growing up, things like this happened all the time. But no parents or coaches were around to know about it because we were out on some field or playground by ourselves. I know it's hard, but your daughter will learn more if you let her handle this herself.
That may be true in the case of other parents' children but not mine.

Mine are special.

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Post by TomatoTomahto » Thu Sep 08, 2011 11:49 am

marco100 wrote:
Last year my daughter had a team-mate (on a 14 and under hockey team) whose parents told the girl in the presence of parents that she didn't need more coaching, she knew more than the coach about how to play defense. Can you imagine? BTW, FWIW, the girl in question was a great skater, but had no clue about defense and teamwork.
Most likely since it's girls youth ice hockey they play it as a "non contact" sport which isn't even hockey to begin with.

How good can the girl skate after being dumped on her rear a few times with a few good, hard legal checks?
You'd be surprised. Although they were a 14U team, they were Tier I and frequently played up (vs 16U and 19U teams). The rules prohibit open-ice checking for girls, but they get very physical in the corners and especially around the net. Most of the girls play boys hockey in the spring and frequently for their high school teams when they get old enough. Some girls hockey is slow and patty-cake, but then again, so is much boys hockey. At the Tier I level, and the upper levels of Tier II, it's a different story.

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Post by roadking2615 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 12:56 pm

To Random Musings question: "Do the parents exhibit the same type of traits that their daughter exhibits?"

No, not at all. They are very nice people who we've known for a year or so.

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Post by Random Musings » Thu Sep 08, 2011 1:30 pm

roadking2615 wrote:To Random Musings question: "Do the parents exhibit the same type of traits that their daughter exhibits?"

No, not at all. They are very nice people who we've known for a year or so.
Perhaps you can talk to them directly. At least they can stop their child from exhibiting that behavior toward your child.

RM

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Post by TomatoTomahto » Thu Sep 08, 2011 3:37 pm

Random Musings wrote:
roadking2615 wrote:To Random Musings question: "Do the parents exhibit the same type of traits that their daughter exhibits?"

No, not at all. They are very nice people who we've known for a year or so.
Perhaps you can talk to them directly. At least they can stop their child from exhibiting that behavior toward your child.

RM
Danger Will Robinson Danger

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Post by Random Musings » Thu Sep 08, 2011 3:58 pm

Claude wrote:
Random Musings wrote:
roadking2615 wrote:To Random Musings question: "Do the parents exhibit the same type of traits that their daughter exhibits?"

No, not at all. They are very nice people who we've known for a year or so.
Perhaps you can talk to them directly. At least they can stop their child from exhibiting that behavior toward your child.

RM
Danger Will Robinson Danger
Amazing that "friends" can't work things out anymore through direct communication. Pussyfooting at it's finest.

By the way, are the two kids friends (and the other kid is just like this during soccer), or just the parents?

RM

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Steelersfan
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Post by Steelersfan » Thu Sep 08, 2011 5:33 pm

Claude wrote:
Random Musings wrote:
roadking2615 wrote:To Random Musings question: "Do the parents exhibit the same type of traits that their daughter exhibits?"

No, not at all. They are very nice people who we've known for a year or so.
Perhaps you can talk to them directly. At least they can stop their child from exhibiting that behavior toward your child.

RM
Danger Will Robinson Danger
+1

Kids develop at different ages and their interests change. Parents should understand this and let nature take it's course. Maybe she'll grow confidence and like soccer more. Maybe she won't and will become a world class musician. Parents taking over kid's challenges as their own is a dangerous way to go.

Disclosure- I coached and refereed soccer for 25 years and had two kids play it for 15 years each. I haven't seen it all, but I have seen a majority of it. This one I've seen over and over again.

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ladders11
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Post by ladders11 » Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:03 pm

Steelersfan wrote:Maybe she'll grow confidence and like soccer more. Maybe she won't and will become a world class musician.
You're right. My impression was always that soccer favored kids who were fast and aggressive. Especially at young ages, they all chase the ball like a swarm of bees. When I played, if you were not a fast runner, you didn't get the ball very often. Position play and passing seem to be developed as kids get older.

In contrast, as someone mentioned upthread, if playing a sport like baseball everyone gets to bat. Of course tennis, golf and skiing are purely individual sports. Some kids would like these more because there is more time spent doing and less waiting or jogging to keep up.

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