Darth Vader robs bank in NY

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stratton
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Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by stratton » Fri Jul 23, 2010 8:05 pm

Darth Vader robs bank in NY
Darth Vader robs bank in New York seems almost unbelievable but it's true. A robber disguised as Star Wars character Darth Vader robbed a Long Island Chase Bank at 11:30 AM on Thursday.

A thief dressed as Darth Vader entered the Setauket branch. The robber used a semiautomatic gun rather than a light saber to threaten the teller as he demanded money.
Does Adrian have an alibi? :P

Paul
...and then Buffy staked Edward. The end.

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HueyLD
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Post by HueyLD » Fri Jul 23, 2010 9:33 pm

I think George Lucas is in therapy.

Trivia question. Who will be the next StarWars character bank robber?
(1) Yoda,
(2) The Emperor, or
(3) Anakin Skywalker?

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Dan Moroboshi
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Post by Dan Moroboshi » Fri Jul 23, 2010 10:49 pm

"I find your lack of funds disturbing."

"I am altering your balance. Pray I do not alter it further."

And of course Vader's using a pistol. Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no substitute for a good blaster at your side.

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Adrian Nenu
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Post by Adrian Nenu » Fri Jul 23, 2010 11:49 pm

Does Adrian have an alibi?
I didn't do it! :wink:

Adrian
anenu@tampabay.rr.com

firewynd
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Post by firewynd » Sat Jul 24, 2010 12:32 am

Haha that would be hilarious if he actually used star wars lines. But from the picture I saw of him with the gun - it was probably a very scary situation.

SP-diceman
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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by SP-diceman » Sat Jul 24, 2010 12:58 am

stratton wrote:Darth Vader robs bank in NY
Darth Vader robs bank in New York seems almost unbelievable but it's true. A robber disguised as Star Wars character Darth Vader robbed a Long Island Chase Bank at 11:30 AM on Thursday.

A thief dressed as Darth Vader entered the Setauket branch. The robber used a semiautomatic gun rather than a light saber to threaten the teller as he demanded money.
Does Adrian have an alibi? :P

Paul
A witness saw a man in a baseball uniform (and carrying a bat)
drive the getaway car.


Thanks
SP-diceman

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Post by magicmom » Sat Jul 24, 2010 5:56 am

Bat Man? :oops:

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Post by SteveB3005 » Sat Jul 24, 2010 6:40 am

magicmom wrote:Bat Man? :oops:
Riddle solved! Appears to be Darth Vader and Batman, but really they were robbin'.

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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by Valuethinker » Sat Jul 24, 2010 6:49 am

stratton wrote:Darth Vader robs bank in NY
Darth Vader robs bank in New York seems almost unbelievable but it's true. A robber disguised as Star Wars character Darth Vader robbed a Long Island Chase Bank at 11:30 AM on Thursday.

A thief dressed as Darth Vader entered the Setauket branch. The robber used a semiautomatic gun rather than a light saber to threaten the teller as he demanded money.
Does Adrian have an alibi? :P

Paul
Ever see the movie 'Point Break' with Patrick Swayze?

Scariest bit was they used Richard Nixon masks in their robberies.

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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by beardsworth » Sat Jul 24, 2010 8:46 am

SP-diceman wrote:A witness saw a man in a baseball uniform (and carrying a bat) drive the getaway car.
magicmom wrote:Bat Man?
SteveB3005 wrote:Riddle solved! Appears to be Darth Vader and Batman, but really they were robbin'.
Could be mistaken, but in keeping with the humorous purported link between Adrian's forum avatar and the costume worn by the bank robber in this news story, I suspect that SP-diceman was making a humorous reference to another Bogleheads poster whose avatar is a baseball player–with–bat and who goes by a name having to do with Rico–Petrocelli––though–not–the–real–Rico. . . . I think I "get it," but if not, then this thread has moved beyond my personal limit for understanding the surreal. But then I'd also always assumed that Darth Vader had more "cosmic" things to do than robbing banks. :)

Marc

FafnerMorell
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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by FafnerMorell » Sat Jul 24, 2010 9:32 am

MarcMyWord wrote:But then I'd also always assumed that Darth Vader had more "cosmic" things to do than robbing banks. :)
Perhaps the Imperial pension system has been slow on getting the checks out. Vader doesn't seem like the kind to automatically have 10% of his paycheck deposited in portfolio of balanced, low-fee index funds. The Emperor, on the other hand, is probably rather methodical about this, and has Admiral status in all of funds.

On a slightly more realistic (but still fantasy) note - this would make the perfect setup if there were two accomplices. Imagine the Darth Vader guy (properly dressed) has a accomplice in the crowd. When he goes to rob the cashier, the accomplice steps up and tries stop it and says "You're not really Vader", but Vader just says "I find your lack of faith disturbing." and the guy begins holding his neck, gasping for air, and collapsing on the ground (he's in on it, so he just runs out in pretend panic after Vader stops).

Vader then turns to the cashier (also an accomplice) does the Jedi hand wave and says "You will put the money in the bag". The cashier says back in a robotic voice "I will put the money in the bag" and does so. "You will not put any paint bombs or security devices in the bag". Then "I was never here". The cashier repeats both phrases. Afterwards, the cashier denies any memory of what happened or of Vader even being in the bank.

Sure, everyone will know it couldn't really be Vader, but you've introduced a lot of doubts way in the back of people's minds.

Still, from what I've read, robbing a typical bank robbery results in only $20,000 or so, and that's if everything goes really well for the robbers. It doesn't seem like a cost-effective way to make a long-term living, given the risks.

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CassiusKing
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Post by CassiusKing » Sat Jul 24, 2010 9:57 am

Dan Moroboshi wrote:"I find your lack of funds disturbing."

"I am altering your balance. Pray I do not alter it further."

And of course Vader's using a pistol. Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no substitute for a good blaster at your side.
:lol :sharebeer
"Who cares how time advances? I'm drinking ale today." -Edgar Allan Poe

SP-diceman
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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by SP-diceman » Sat Jul 24, 2010 10:15 am

MarcMyWord wrote:
SP-diceman wrote:A witness saw a man in a baseball uniform (and carrying a bat) drive the getaway car.
magicmom wrote:Bat Man?
SteveB3005 wrote:Riddle solved! Appears to be Darth Vader and Batman, but really they were robbin'.
Could be mistaken, but in keeping with the humorous purported link between Adrian's forum avatar and the costume worn by the bank robber in this news story, I suspect that SP-diceman was making a humorous reference to another Bogleheads poster whose avatar is a baseball player–with–bat and who goes by a name having to do with Rico–Petrocelli––though–not–the–real–Rico. . . . I think I "get it," but if not, then this thread has moved beyond my personal limit for understanding the surreal. But then I'd also always assumed that Darth Vader had more "cosmic" things to do than robbing banks. :)

Marc
Yes.

I guess I could have made it more clear by saying the getaway
driver was wearing a $5000 watch.


Thanks
SP-diceman

swyck
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Post by swyck » Sat Jul 24, 2010 9:18 pm

CassiusKing wrote:
Dan Moroboshi wrote:"I find your lack of funds disturbing."

"I am altering your balance. Pray I do not alter it further."

And of course Vader's using a pistol. Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no substitute for a good blaster at your side.
:lol :sharebeer
:D

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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by cjackson0 » Sat Jul 24, 2010 9:23 pm

FafnerMorell wrote: Still, from what I've read, robbing a typical bank robbery results in only $20,000 or so, and that's if everything goes really well for the robbers. It doesn't seem like a cost-effective way to make a long-term living, given the risks.
Agreed. Although even if they were taking home $2 million I would think it doesn't justify the risk.

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JMacDonald
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Post by JMacDonald » Mon Jul 26, 2010 6:35 pm

Hi,
Here is a guy who is probably related to Darth Vader robber: http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504083_162- ... 04083.html

Man Dressed in Wig, Clown Pants and Fake Breasts Robs Bank with BB Gun, Say Cops
"He would get my nomination for dumbest criminal, I think. Yeah, definitely different," said Swissvale Police Chief Greg Geppert, according to KDKA. "I mean, with the wig on, you still have his black facial hair with a blondish wig, definitely different."
Best Wishes, | Joe

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ryuns
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Post by ryuns » Mon Jul 26, 2010 8:55 pm

HueyLD wrote:I think George Lucas is in therapy.

Trivia question. Who will be the next StarWars character bank robber?
(1) Yoda,
(2) The Emperor, or
(3) Anakin Skywalker?
I'm guessing Anakin. Actually, Hayden Christiansen. I mean, he couldn't have gotten any more work after Episode 3.
An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered. -- GK Chesterton

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Post by baw703916 » Mon Jul 26, 2010 9:30 pm

HueyLD wrote:I think George Lucas is in therapy.

Trivia question. Who will be the next StarWars character bank robber?
(1) Yoda,
(2) The Emperor, or
(3) Anakin Skywalker?
Chewbacca. Actually, he will just be trying to make a deposit, but the teller won't understand Wookie and will hit the panic button when he "growls" at her. :wink:

Brad
Most of my posts assume no behavioral errors.

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Post by anakinskywalker » Mon Jul 26, 2010 10:30 pm

ryuns wrote:
HueyLD wrote:I think George Lucas is in therapy.

Trivia question. Who will be the next StarWars character bank robber?
(1) Yoda,
(2) The Emperor, or
(3) Anakin Skywalker?
I'm guessing Anakin. Actually, Hayden Christiansen. I mean, he couldn't have gotten any more work after Episode 3.
Thanks, but I'm not interested in taking dirty smelly germ-infested pieces of paper from your little planet. Padme and I have much better things to do.

Anakin

PS: And to the guy who said the Emperor has Admiral status on Vanguard: that's not right. The Emperor never demeans himself by accepting any status less than that of Emperor, anywhere. If your Vanguard offers him Emperor status, he may consider the offer.

PS2: Tell your Jedi force to look for Count Dooku. He may be trying to create trouble by robbing your banks dressed up as someone else.

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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by anakinskywalker » Mon Jul 26, 2010 10:39 pm

FafnerMorell wrote:
MarcMyWord wrote:But then I'd also always assumed that Darth Vader had more "cosmic" things to do than robbing banks. :)
Perhaps the Imperial pension system has been slow on getting the checks out. Vader doesn't seem like the kind to automatically have 10% of his paycheck deposited in portfolio of balanced, low-fee index funds. The Emperor, on the other hand, is probably rather methodical about this, and has Admiral status in all of funds.

On a slightly more realistic (but still fantasy) note - this would make the perfect setup if there were two accomplices. Imagine the Darth Vader guy (properly dressed) has a accomplice in the crowd. When he goes to rob the cashier, the accomplice steps up and tries stop it and says "You're not really Vader", but Vader just says "I find your lack of faith disturbing." and the guy begins holding his neck, gasping for air, and collapsing on the ground (he's in on it, so he just runs out in pretend panic after Vader stops).

Vader then turns to the cashier (also an accomplice) does the Jedi hand wave and says "You will put the money in the bag". The cashier says back in a robotic voice "I will put the money in the bag" and does so. "You will not put any paint bombs or security devices in the bag". Then "I was never here". The cashier repeats both phrases. Afterwards, the cashier denies any memory of what happened or of Vader even being in the bank.

Sure, everyone will know it couldn't really be Vader, but you've introduced a lot of doubts way in the back of people's minds.

Still, from what I've read, robbing a typical bank robbery results in only $20,000 or so, and that's if everything goes really well for the robbers. It doesn't seem like a cost-effective way to make a long-term living, given the risks.

This is a great idea, Earthling.

Here is what I suggest: play this scenario out in a NYC Subway train, or at the Grand Central Terminal.

Like the Improv team does.

Don't involve guns (real or fake) or any violence, like bank robbery or any kind of pretend-crime.

Just have Darth walk up to someone (accomplice) and rudely say something. Have a second accomplice intervene in a manner that is not sufficiently deferential to Darth, and then have Darth turn towards him and make him suffocate with his will power.

Then the first accomplice who was being rudely spoken to by Darth eagerly obeys Darth's commands, the first one being to drag away the dead body of the second accomplice and then come back to take his place.

Just don't do this during rush hour. Pick a weekend afternoon.

Let me know when you plan to do it and I might watch if I happen to be free at the time.

Anakin

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Post by FafnerMorell » Tue Jul 27, 2010 7:24 am

^ Thanks. If I was into performance art or needed a project for a theature class, I'd be really tempted to give it a try (if I could rent a good quality Vader suit, and find 2 willing accomplices). There's not much in the way of public transportation in Houston (Official city motto: Won't someone please ride our light rail system, please?!) - so probably no hope of a performance soon - not even a direct-to-YouTube version.

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Dan Moroboshi
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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by Dan Moroboshi » Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:45 am

anakinskywalker wrote:Just have Darth walk up to someone (accomplice) and rudely say something. Have a second accomplice intervene in a manner that is not sufficiently deferential to Darth, and then have Darth turn towards him and make him suffocate with his will power.

Then the first accomplice who was being rudely spoken to by Darth eagerly obeys Darth's commands, the first one being to drag away the dead body of the second accomplice and then come back to take his place.
You mean like this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jdQqjcsfC8

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Adrian Nenu
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Post by Adrian Nenu » Tue Jul 27, 2010 12:05 pm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLRPGJ8sDbU

"Isn't this proof that capitalism is ruled by the Dark Side?"

Adrian
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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by HomerJ » Tue Jul 27, 2010 12:59 pm

cjackson0 wrote:
FafnerMorell wrote: Still, from what I've read, robbing a typical bank robbery results in only $20,000 or so, and that's if everything goes really well for the robbers. It doesn't seem like a cost-effective way to make a long-term living, given the risks.
Agreed. Although even if they were taking home $2 million I would think it doesn't justify the risk.
$2 million could be worth the risk.. You only have to steal $2 million once... Reminds me when I was working at a bank... Some guy got caught embezzling $75k and went to prison...

I and all my co-workers agreed that if you're going to steal from the bank that you work at, you steal a couple of million and then leave the country. You don't steal 75k and sit at your desk for 6 months until they notice the discrepancy in the books and arrest you.

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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by anakinskywalker » Wed Jul 28, 2010 1:27 am

Dan Moroboshi wrote:
anakinskywalker wrote:Just have Darth walk up to someone (accomplice) and rudely say something. Have a second accomplice intervene in a manner that is not sufficiently deferential to Darth, and then have Darth turn towards him and make him suffocate with his will power.

Then the first accomplice who was being rudely spoken to by Darth eagerly obeys Darth's commands, the first one being to drag away the dead body of the second accomplice and then come back to take his place.
You mean like this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jdQqjcsfC8
Thanks for bringing this treachery to my attention. I have forwarded this information to my future self.

Anakin

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Re: Darth Vader robs bank in NY

Post by anakinskywalker » Wed Jul 28, 2010 1:36 am

rrosenkoetter wrote:
cjackson0 wrote:
FafnerMorell wrote: Still, from what I've read, robbing a typical bank robbery results in only $20,000 or so, and that's if everything goes really well for the robbers. It doesn't seem like a cost-effective way to make a long-term living, given the risks.
Agreed. Although even if they were taking home $2 million I would think it doesn't justify the risk.
$2 million could be worth the risk.. You only have to steal $2 million once... Reminds me when I was working at a bank... Some guy got caught embezzling $75k and went to prison...

I and all my co-workers agreed that if you're going to steal from the bank that you work at, you steal a couple of million and then leave the country. You don't steal 75k and sit at your desk for 6 months until they notice the discrepancy in the books and arrest you.

Didn't expect this from a Boglehead.

IMHO no amount of money is worth the price of one's self-respect and peace of mind. And the risk that someday one's children will learn that their father/mother is a thief. And the pain they will feel when someone rudely tells them their parents are criminals and they have to silently bear it as they have nothing that can refute the charges.

I would not steal for a thousand, million, billion, trillion, quadrillion, or any other amount.

I was expecting some other Boglehead would say this already.

Anakin

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Post by FafnerMorell » Wed Jul 28, 2010 8:28 am

I'd guess that some things go without saying. My original thinking was that, just given the economic cost-benefits/risk of robbing a bank (and ignoring any moral/ethical issues), robbing a bank (at least for $20,000) doesn't make a lot of sense. It's not just bad morally, but economically as well.

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