earlywynnfan wrote: ↑Tue Aug 11, 2020 7:48 am
theplayer11 wrote: ↑Tue Aug 11, 2020 6:34 am
jerkstore wrote: ↑Tue Aug 11, 2020 5:15 am
Another vote for encouraging her to make her own decision. It's her money, she's an adult...real job, pays real taxes, will have real debt obligation.
Just because she asks for your input doesn't mean you should give it, it means that it's welcomed, but not necessarily what's best for her.
I don't have a daughter, maybe it's harder to step back with a daughter...but still I'm a strong vote for step back dad
Daughter - "hey dad, I really would like your opinion on what my first car purchase should be...new?, used?..and how much do you think I should spend?"
Me - "sorry honey, I think it's best for you to figure it out yourself."
sorry, that just sounds crazy to me.
I agree. Early 20's, brand new job with probably a high learning curve, possibly looking at a new living situation, new friends, maybe some significant other in her life or on the horizon. Probably first time with "adult cash" in pocket. How many people are going to delve into car research? And really, while there are some smarter choices than others, how much can online research tell you about which car is best for you? I would love to know how many on this forum had parents whose advice was "look it up yourself, I don't care how big a decision it is."
If you tell her to do it on her own, aren't the chances high she'll just buy the cute car her friend has?
Or ask advice from some meathead guy she's dating or knew in college?
And I'm surprised nobody has seriously mentioned the style and fit of the car. Come on, BH, there's a reason we don't all have Accords and Camrys! Start by having her note a few styles on the road that she'd actually want to see in her driveway for 10 years, then go from there. One of my daughters has a civic, one the HR-V, and neither would trade for anything. Isn't that important, too?
I have no issue that you(and others) think it "sounds crazy", and I'll write that off as different parenting philosophy...shrug...we are each entitled. Admittedly I have 3 sons, and no daughters, perhaps I'm missing something. However, I'll consider my job done as a parent when my sons freely make their own decisions as adults, including mistakes, and live by them with integrity. That's life.
Please also note, that it sounds crazy to me when adults parent adults.
I was going to let this go and write if off as "differing parental philosophy," but this comment smacks of a low view of a young women you don't know. I hope my sons don't assume this about young women they don't know.
Furthermore, car research has never been easier...and one can research and transact a new or used car will relative ease today.
I had purchased 2 used cars (and sold them) and then purchased a used truck before I graduated high school without any parental input....had no idea I was such a special person