Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

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catdude
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Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by catdude » Thu Sep 05, 2019 11:47 pm

Hi there Bogleheads -

I recently moved... I hired a moving company to haul my stuff from the old house to the new one. Their fee was about $575. They sent two guys out to do the job, which took about five hours. When their work was done, I told them that I didn't know the protocol for such situations, but I gave them each 20 bucks. They looked a little underwhelmed. Did I commit a faux pas? Would it have been better to not tip them at all? I'm still trying to figure out what's appropriate in such cases.
catdude | | "Only in America." (Yogi Berra, after being told that the mayor of Catholic Dublin was Jewish)

123
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by 123 » Fri Sep 06, 2019 12:27 am

This question has been asked before and there are a variety of responses which may make you feel comfortable or more uncomfortable with your actions, take your pick viewtopic.php?t=218811
The closest helping hand is at the end of your own arm.

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catdude
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by catdude » Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:09 am

123,

Thanks much for the link. Very enlightening thread... lots of opinions on this topic, but after reading that thread I wish I'd tipped those guys at least 40 bucks each.
catdude | | "Only in America." (Yogi Berra, after being told that the mayor of Catholic Dublin was Jewish)

mortfree
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by mortfree » Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:17 am

I paid a moving company 2k.

There were 5 movers.

I gave them each $20.

Felt cheap doing so but I got over it pretty quickly.

stimulacra
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by stimulacra » Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:23 am

Last two moves I've tipped 4 guys $20 each and 3 guys $100 total. The moves took about 3-4 hours each and I provided cold beverages and in one instance, breakfast tacos.

For two guys working 5 hours, I might have gone up to $40 or $50 each.

30% of gross weight of each move are my books so I have some empathy in the situation.

smectym
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by smectym » Fri Sep 06, 2019 4:42 am

catdude wrote:
Thu Sep 05, 2019 11:47 pm
Hi there Bogleheads -

I recently moved... I hired a moving company to haul my stuff from the old house to the new one. Their fee was about $575. They sent two guys out to do the job, which took about five hours. When their work was done, I told them that I didn't know the protocol for such situations, but I gave them each 20 bucks. They looked a little underwhelmed. Did I commit a faux pas? Would it have been better to not tip them at all? I'm still trying to figure out what's appropriate in such cases.
Interesting. I try to be a generous (but not an outlier) tipper in such situations on the ground that “the laborer is worthy of his hire,” but I would have thought $20 per guy OK based on the cost of the move. If there was an undue amount of huffing and puffing, difficult feats of getting oddly shaped furniture up twisting flights of stairs, then maybe additional gratuity is warranted. Otherwise I think you’re OK. I’d avoid making comments such as “I don’t know what the protocol is in such situations,” perhaps that's what put them off.

No, it would not have been better not to tip them at all. In my experience it’s expected, and based on what they’re probably getting paid it is warranted.

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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by oldcomputerguy » Fri Sep 06, 2019 4:51 am

This topic is now in the Personal Consumer Issues forum (tipping). -- mod oldcomputerguy
"I’ve come around to this: If you’re dumb, surround yourself with smart people; and if you’re smart, surround yourself with smart people who disagree with you." (Aaron Sorkin)

smectym
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by smectym » Fri Sep 06, 2019 5:03 am

Just as an addendum, tipping protocol isn’t unrelated to the financial circumstances of the tipper. If the tipper needs to watch every penny, then by all means, be a “Scrooge” when it comes to gratuities—not “don’t tip,” but cut it fine, because one must. If the tipper is in better shape financially, then loosen the strings: be more generous, while on the other hand avoiding “high tips” which might draw attention. That type of attention typically isn’t what you want: they think you’re clueless, unstable, needy, “a mark,”—nothing good.

student
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by student » Fri Sep 06, 2019 5:53 am

I think $20 per mover is fine according to this article https://www.realsimple.com/work-life/tipping-movers

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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by hornet96 » Fri Sep 06, 2019 5:56 am

smectym wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 5:03 am
Just as an addendum, tipping protocol isn’t unrelated to the financial circumstances of the tipper. If the tipper needs to watch every penny, then by all means, be a “Scrooge” when it comes to gratuities—not “don’t tip,” but cut it fine, because one must. If the tipper is in better shape financially, then loosen the strings: be more generous, while on the other hand avoiding “high tips” which might draw attention. That type of attention typically isn’t what you want: they think you’re clueless, unstable, needy, “a mark,”—nothing good.
So the amount to tip is primarily based on how rich the tipper is? Interesting.

Tipping culture in the US drives me crazy. If it’s expected, it’s not a tip; rather, it’s a hidden cost in the contract, apparently based on how rich the buyer is. Movers typically price the move based on the amount of items to be moved. I know it’s hard work, but that work is covered by the terms and pricing of the contract that everyone agreed to. Tipping should only be considered if there was something particularly unusual about the move; i.e. special procedures requested to move an antique historical cabinet or the like.

mrmass
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by mrmass » Fri Sep 06, 2019 5:59 am

I will tip movers, or workers that are at my house "laboring" I also tip about 18-20% when out. But I really dislike when people receiving tips complain about bad tippers. My advise that that is to get a job that doesn't rely on tips.

Vanguard Fan 1367
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by Vanguard Fan 1367 » Fri Sep 06, 2019 6:13 am

I didn't tip my movers. It wasn't on my radar. If I move again I will plan to cough up 20 bucks for each of the helpers.

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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by Trader Joe » Fri Sep 06, 2019 6:17 am

catdude wrote:
Thu Sep 05, 2019 11:47 pm
Hi there Bogleheads -

I recently moved... I hired a moving company to haul my stuff from the old house to the new one. Their fee was about $575. They sent two guys out to do the job, which took about five hours. When their work was done, I told them that I didn't know the protocol for such situations, but I gave them each 20 bucks. They looked a little underwhelmed. Did I commit a faux pas? Would it have been better to not tip them at all? I'm still trying to figure out what's appropriate in such cases.
No, you did not do anything wrong, at all. I think that you were extremely generous. I would not have provided any tip.

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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by whodidntante » Fri Sep 06, 2019 6:22 am

I think $20 PP is reasonable although I live a pretty spartan lifestyle, so I'm a mover's dream. I would pay more if they were moving my 30 year collection of worthless bowling balls while demanding no scratches, or my kids orchestra pit. I would not expect them to express gratitude because I recognize that it's a small amount of money. If I gave them two grand, I would expect gratitude. Or at least, I think so. I would not give them two grand.

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Watty
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by Watty » Fri Sep 06, 2019 6:52 am

As I said in that prior thread tipping is very regional and more common in the northeast.

In the areas I have lived in $40 for a $575 move would have been generous and no tip would be common for a normal move.

If there was something like lots of stairs or a cold rainy day then I would be more prone to tip movers.

msk
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by msk » Fri Sep 06, 2019 7:02 am

catdude wrote:
Thu Sep 05, 2019 11:47 pm
I recently moved... I hired a moving company to haul my stuff from the old house to the new one. Their fee was about $575. They sent two guys out to do the job, which took about five hours.
Now, let's see. The guys get paid for their labor, that their employer charges over $100 per hour. How much to tip a plumber who charges you $60 per hour? :confused

finite_difference
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by finite_difference » Fri Sep 06, 2019 7:16 am

hornet96 wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 5:56 am
smectym wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 5:03 am
Just as an addendum, tipping protocol isn’t unrelated to the financial circumstances of the tipper. If the tipper needs to watch every penny, then by all means, be a “Scrooge” when it comes to gratuities—not “don’t tip,” but cut it fine, because one must. If the tipper is in better shape financially, then loosen the strings: be more generous, while on the other hand avoiding “high tips” which might draw attention. That type of attention typically isn’t what you want: they think you’re clueless, unstable, needy, “a mark,”—nothing good.
So the amount to tip is primarily based on how rich the tipper is? Interesting.

Tipping culture in the US drives me crazy. If it’s expected, it’s not a tip; rather, it’s a hidden cost in the contract, apparently based on how rich the buyer is. Movers typically price the move based on the amount of items to be moved. I know it’s hard work, but that work is covered by the terms and pricing of the contract that everyone agreed to. Tipping should only be considered if there was something particularly unusual about the move; i.e. special procedures requested to move an antique historical cabinet or the like.
That’s one way to look at it.

Another way, is to understand the US is a highly competitive, capitalist country with few regulations but with unwritten rules about helping others.

So, the implication is that your mover is probably not laughing his way to the bank thanks to his wage including tips. It means that people with less means can get a good price, which is subsidized by people with more means that can tip a little bit more, or who are simply more generous.

Unfortunately this approach does break down when the minimum wage is too low and/or you have a string of bad luck with tips.

But that’s the culture we have. So unless regulations change, expect it to continue by necessity.
The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention. - Thich Nhat Hanh

student
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by student » Fri Sep 06, 2019 7:23 am

msk wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 7:02 am
catdude wrote:
Thu Sep 05, 2019 11:47 pm
I recently moved... I hired a moving company to haul my stuff from the old house to the new one. Their fee was about $575. They sent two guys out to do the job, which took about five hours.
Now, let's see. The guys get paid for their labor, that their employer charges over $100 per hour. How much to tip a plumber who charges you $60 per hour? :confused
I don't tip plumbers. They are highly trained and highly paid professionals. AARP says no need to tip under normal circumstances. https://www.aarp.org/money/budgeting-sa ... uette.html

jbuzolich
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by jbuzolich » Fri Sep 06, 2019 7:33 am

I've never heard of tipping movers before. Not wanting to slight anyone but I would have paid the quoted price, probably on credit card, and expected all my identified stuff to move from starting location to destination. I've only moved a handful of times in my personal life. For work though we have to hire movers multiple times each year and definitely not allowed to pay anything over the quote amount.

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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by hornet96 » Fri Sep 06, 2019 8:52 am

finite_difference wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 7:16 am

Another way, is to understand the US is a highly competitive, capitalist country with few regulations but with unwritten rules about helping others.

....

So, the implication is that your mover is probably not laughing his way to the bank thanks to his wage including tips. It means that people with less means can get a good price, which is subsidized by people with more means that can tip a little bit more, or who are simply more generous.

......

But that’s the culture we have. So unless regulations change, expect it to continue by necessity.
I fully understand the US capitalist system. Our system is based (mostly) on free market economics, where supply and demand dictate the price of goods or services consumed. It also dictates the supply and demand of labor for particular skills (or lack thereof) in the economy. It says nothing about whether the consumer is expected to subsidize the employer's cost of labor, above and beyond the contracted rate.

If the mover isn't happy with his wage, he should do something about it to get a better paying job. Of course that may be difficult due to whatever his life circumstances are, but that is the nature of a capitalist system. There are no free lunches, and if he wants it bad enough, he will figure out a way to improve his skills/go to school/etc so that he doesn't have to rely on the charity of those "with more means" than him paying him more than the current fair market value for his services.

None of that is meant to say that I don't support charitable giving (of course I do). I just don't believe in providing charity as a consumer who has already agreed to a contracted rate with the supplier.

As an aside, I realize that wait staff at restaurants rely on tips as they are paid less than minimum wage (so I do usually leave the customary tip at restaurants). I also think that system is a farce, but is a subject for a whole other thread.

fru-gal
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by fru-gal » Fri Sep 06, 2019 9:14 am

Three guys from a family run moving company spent about an hour moving furniture mostly up narrow stairs. At some earlier point I had been told that the company charged a minimum of $400. I was just having a relatively small amount of furniture moved out of storage. I gave them each $20 and they disappeared back into the truck area and then presented me with a bill for $200. I guess I tipped too much :-) but I don't regret it. Even if it hadn't affected the bill, I wouldn't regret it. Just like I give a peapod worker $5 when I pick up an order, although they are not supposed to take tips. I am lucky I am not working for $10-$15 an hour, so I try to be decent about tips.

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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by dbr » Fri Sep 06, 2019 9:23 am

In the case of movers, delivery people for large items, etc. I consider whether or not there is extra work due to location, stairs, etc.

I recently gave a pretty good tip to two guys who wrestled a new extra thick queen size mattress up narrow stairs and into a back room having also removed a previous mattress the same way. It was probably about ten times the physical effort of putting the same mattress on the first floor of a house with wide doorways and no stairs. I do the same things with washer/dryer down into our somewhat inaccessible basement compared to putting a washer/dryer in a laundry room inside the back door. I have always experienced that people are pleased and I am glad they are. Moving and delivering heavy stuff is not an easy nor a high paying job.

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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by Abe » Fri Sep 06, 2019 12:55 pm

Why are you concerned about a tip? Doesn't the moving company pay its workers?
Slow and steady wins the race.

barnaclebob
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by barnaclebob » Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:14 pm

It might have been a lower than average tip but I wouldn't call it a faux pas.

lgs88
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by lgs88 » Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:32 pm

I was a furniture mover for a couple summers in college. A tip of $40/day was average; $20 was below average but better than no tip at all, which did happen from time to time. I wouldn't lose sleep over it.

You should know that lots of moving companies will low-ball a non-binding estimate. This always frustrated the movers, because then the shipper would blame us for not getting it done under the absurd estimate -- or even if they didn't blame us, they'd be feeling financially pinched at the end of the day, so we'd get the short end of the stick.

I'm glad I don't have to do that sort of work anymore. All these years later, I fondly remember a few customers who were especially generous with us; they were usually regular guys who knew what it was to work. The zero-tippers I've mostly forgotten, except for the few who were simultaneously rich, cheap, and rude -- we'd have a laugh over those in the truck on the way back to the shop.

If any of you are interested in the life of a mover, I recommend Finn Murphy's excellent book "The Long Haul" about his career in trucking and moving. Needless to say, movers aren't all dumb muscle. And if you really make 'em mad, well, we've got some tricks up our sleeves...
merely an interested amateur

dbr
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by dbr » Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:35 pm

I suspect furniture moving is not a career with great longevity due to wear and tear on the body. It doesn't bother me to hand out a little extra.

There are plenty of tipping scenarios that are far more questionable.

FrugalConservative
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by FrugalConservative » Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:38 pm

I've being very surprised when it comes to how people react to tipping.

I've over tipped and have had the individuals not even say thank you.

Other times I've tipped what is par for the course and was given a thank you and handshake.

You did fine OP, dont let it keep you up at night!

oldfatguy
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by oldfatguy » Fri Sep 06, 2019 1:43 pm

It would never occur to me to tip a mover anything.

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FlyAF
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by FlyAF » Fri Sep 06, 2019 2:19 pm

I tip each in the crew $100 up front and ask them to please be careful.

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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by Jags4186 » Fri Sep 06, 2019 2:25 pm

The last time we moved the movers showed up 6 hours late and then charged me extra because they used a lot of “materials” (i.e. tape to wrap furniture and such). I still tipped them $20 each and felt I was getting ripped off. I didn’t want a brick through a window one day. I don’t really care if they felt it was too little.

criticalmass
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by criticalmass » Fri Sep 06, 2019 2:52 pm

hornet96 wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 8:52 am
As an aside, I realize that wait staff at restaurants rely on tips as they are paid less than minimum wage (so I do usually leave the customary tip at restaurants). I also think that system is a farce, but is a subject for a whole other thread.
This is true only in some states. Many states like Nevada, California, etc. use the same full minimum wage for servers as any other job. The minimum restaurant server wage in California, for example, is $11 an hour plus tips, $12 an hour in some locations. This is the same hourly wage as every other job’s minimum wage.

So should we tip a California restaurant server the same as a hard working California shoe sales person, who has to keep running into the kitchen, I mean stock room, to get your order to try on, plus has to put shoes on and off customers’ feet? Or why not tip a $12/hour mover since are expected to tip a $12/hour waiter.

PS I’ve never heard of tipping a shoe salesperson, but why tip a $12/hour waiter but not a $12/ hour shoe salesman?

My point is a there is a lot of inconsistency in tipping. Don’t sweat it.
Last edited by criticalmass on Fri Sep 06, 2019 2:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

lgs88
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by lgs88 » Fri Sep 06, 2019 2:56 pm

FlyAF wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 2:19 pm
I tip each in the crew $100 up front and ask them to please be careful.
Now here's somebody who gets the white-glove treatment from the movers. It's thoughtful, and it's cheaper than replacing what breaks.
merely an interested amateur

lgs88
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by lgs88 » Fri Sep 06, 2019 2:57 pm

Jags4186 wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 2:25 pm
The last time we moved the movers showed up 6 hours late and then charged me extra because they used a lot of “materials” (i.e. tape to wrap furniture and such). I still tipped them $20 each and felt I was getting ripped off. I didn’t want a brick through a window one day. I don’t really care if they felt it was too little.
Charging for materials is, unfortunately, a part of the business -- and that's on the company, not the movers. They likely showed up late because of an error on the part of the dispatcher rather than the movers themselves.

We never threw a brick through anybody's window, tip or no tip!
merely an interested amateur

davebo
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by davebo » Fri Sep 06, 2019 3:08 pm

Generally speaking, I tip like this:

-Movers are $20/person.
-Restaurants are 15-20%.
-Bars are probably just $1.00, whatever the bill is (assuming 2 drinks)
-Barbers usually $4 on a $16 hair cut, which is a little high now that I think about it.
-Furniture movers give $10.

I never tip housekeepers, mostly because I just don't think about it. I've heard people tip them $1/day per member of your family. That seems kind of high to me, but maybe you're making up for the vast majority that don't tip.

One thing I have an issue with is tipping based on the amount of the bill. Usually service should go up the more you spend, but then you have situations like when you're in Disneyworld. We were doing Free Dining and our bills would've been like $200 had we paid out of cash. The bill will mention that and then recommend that you tip 18-20%, which would mean something like a $45 tip for a buffet.

criticalmass
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by criticalmass » Fri Sep 06, 2019 10:57 pm

davebo wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 3:08 pm
Generally speaking, I tip like this:

-Movers are $20/person.
-Restaurants are 15-20%.
-Bars are probably just $1.00, whatever the bill is (assuming 2 drinks)
-Barbers usually $4 on a $16 hair cut, which is a little high now that I think about it.
-Furniture movers give $10.

I never tip housekeepers, mostly because I just don't think about it. I've heard people tip them $1/day per member of your family. That seems kind of high to me, but maybe you're making up for the vast majority that don't tip.

One thing I have an issue with is tipping based on the amount of the bill. Usually service should go up the more you spend, but then you have situations like when you're in Disneyworld. We were doing Free Dining and our bills would've been like $200 had we paid out of cash. The bill will mention that and then recommend that you tip 18-20%, which would mean something like a $45 tip for a buffet.
Good point about buffets. The standard for buffets has always been 2/3 the tip of full service dining as far as I can remember.

j0nnyg1984
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by j0nnyg1984 » Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:13 am

I hate our tipping system, too, but unless you’ve experienced the completely horrid service from a European restaurant, you really have no idea of how well our system works. I hate eating at restaurants when I’m in Europe for work - England, Austria, Germany...their norm is bad service. They get paid the same no matter what, and they don’t expect (or usually receive) tips.

I’m generally a generous guy when at home in the US, but they don’t hesitate to cut or exclude a tip for below average service.

I had furniture delivered when I first bought my condo - I gave the two guys $50 to split. They made ~3 trips, had access to our freight elevator, and used dollies. Easy.

When my couch was delivered, I gave them $20 to split. I then noticed that the company had sent me the wrong couch. They left the wrong one, and a week later came back to perform the swap. I didn’t tip them again.

Few months ago, did a complete kitchen remodel. Had a local company use a 3rd party delivery for my appliances - two guys delivered my fridge and range using shoulder lifting straps. Their delivery fee was $120, cash only, so I considered that good enough. They didn’t look happy when I handed them the exact amount. 🤷‍♂️

student
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by student » Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:23 am

davebo wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 3:08 pm
Generally speaking, I tip like this:

-Movers are $20/person.
-Restaurants are 15-20%.
-Bars are probably just $1.00, whatever the bill is (assuming 2 drinks)
-Barbers usually $4 on a $16 hair cut, which is a little high now that I think about it.
-Furniture movers give $10.

I never tip housekeepers, mostly because I just don't think about it. I've heard people tip them $1/day per member of your family. That seems kind of high to me, but maybe you're making up for the vast majority that don't tip.

One thing I have an issue with is tipping based on the amount of the bill. Usually service should go up the more you spend, but then you have situations like when you're in Disneyworld. We were doing Free Dining and our bills would've been like $200 had we paid out of cash. The bill will mention that and then recommend that you tip 18-20%, which would mean something like a $45 tip for a buffet.
The tip for buffet is usually less. 10%. Emily Post tipping guide is a good starting point. https://emilypost.com/advice/general-tipping-guide/ This is what I follow except for housekeepers.

criticalmass
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by criticalmass » Sat Sep 07, 2019 9:12 am

student wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:23 am
davebo wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 3:08 pm
Generally speaking, I tip like this:

-Movers are $20/person.
-Restaurants are 15-20%.
-Bars are probably just $1.00, whatever the bill is (assuming 2 drinks)
-Barbers usually $4 on a $16 hair cut, which is a little high now that I think about it.
-Furniture movers give $10.

I never tip housekeepers, mostly because I just don't think about it. I've heard people tip them $1/day per member of your family. That seems kind of high to me, but maybe you're making up for the vast majority that don't tip.

One thing I have an issue with is tipping based on the amount of the bill. Usually service should go up the more you spend, but then you have situations like when you're in Disneyworld. We were doing Free Dining and our bills would've been like $200 had we paid out of cash. The bill will mention that and then recommend that you tip 18-20%, which would mean something like a $45 tip for a buffet.
The tip for buffet is usually less. 10%. Emily Post tipping guide is a good starting point. https://emilypost.com/advice/general-tipping-guide/ This is what I follow except for housekeepers.
My takeaway from the earlier post was that Disney still “suggests” a full service sized tip for a Disney buffet. I’ll stick with your Emily Post recommendation, but thanks Disney :) .

On the other hand, Disney tipped servers get stiffed from tips regularly from a large proportion of European and other non USA visitors. I’ve heard that more than once from former Disney restaurant employees who worked for tips but often nothing from overseas diners. That’s one reason why Disney is big on “recommended” and forced tips.

VaR
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by VaR » Sat Sep 07, 2019 3:09 pm

The main thing is to treat the movers as human beings. This goes for all tipping situations, actually. I think this goes a long way to making people feel good.

If the movers did a good job, I have no problem tipping them well - especially if they took care not to break anything.

Jags4186
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by Jags4186 » Sat Sep 07, 2019 3:15 pm

criticalmass wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 9:12 am
My takeaway from the earlier post was that Disney still “suggests” a full service sized tip for a Disney buffet. I’ll stick with your Emily Post recommendation, but thanks Disney :) .

On the other hand, Disney tipped servers get stiffed from tips regularly from a large proportion of European and other non USA visitors. I’ve heard that more than once from former Disney restaurant employees who worked for tips but often nothing from overseas diners. That’s one reason why Disney is big on “recommended” and forced tips.
Great. So now we’re expected to tip more to make up for the others who don’t tip? Maybe I’ll join the no tipping faction and let everyone else pick up the slack :oops:

student
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by student » Sat Sep 07, 2019 3:15 pm

VaR wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 3:09 pm
The main thing is to treat the movers as human beings. This goes for all tipping situations, actually. I think this goes a long way to making people feel good.
And for non-tipping situations too. :wink:

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Watty
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by Watty » Sat Sep 07, 2019 5:20 pm

student wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:23 am
davebo wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 3:08 pm
Generally speaking, I tip like this:

-Movers are $20/person.
-Restaurants are 15-20%.
-Bars are probably just $1.00, whatever the bill is (assuming 2 drinks)
-Barbers usually $4 on a $16 hair cut, which is a little high now that I think about it.
-Furniture movers give $10.

I never tip housekeepers, mostly because I just don't think about it. I've heard people tip them $1/day per member of your family. That seems kind of high to me, but maybe you're making up for the vast majority that don't tip.

One thing I have an issue with is tipping based on the amount of the bill. Usually service should go up the more you spend, but then you have situations like when you're in Disneyworld. We were doing Free Dining and our bills would've been like $200 had we paid out of cash. The bill will mention that and then recommend that you tip 18-20%, which would mean something like a $45 tip for a buffet.
The tip for buffet is usually less. 10%. Emily Post tipping guide is a good starting point. https://emilypost.com/advice/general-tipping-guide/ This is what I follow except for housekeepers.
The idea of tipping at a buffet under normal circumstances is absurd.

PhilosophyAndrew
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by PhilosophyAndrew » Sat Sep 07, 2019 6:07 pm

Watty wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 5:20 pm
student wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:23 am
davebo wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 3:08 pm
Generally speaking, I tip like this:

-Movers are $20/person.
-Restaurants are 15-20%.
-Bars are probably just $1.00, whatever the bill is (assuming 2 drinks)
-Barbers usually $4 on a $16 hair cut, which is a little high now that I think about it.
-Furniture movers give $10.

I never tip housekeepers, mostly because I just don't think about it. I've heard people tip them $1/day per member of your family. That seems kind of high to me, but maybe you're making up for the vast majority that don't tip.

One thing I have an issue with is tipping based on the amount of the bill. Usually service should go up the more you spend, but then you have situations like when you're in Disneyworld. We were doing Free Dining and our bills would've been like $200 had we paid out of cash. The bill will mention that and then recommend that you tip 18-20%, which would mean something like a $45 tip for a buffet.
The tip for buffet is usually less. 10%. Emily Post tipping guide is a good starting point. https://emilypost.com/advice/general-tipping-guide/ This is what I follow except for housekeepers.
The idea of tipping at a buffet under normal circumstances is absurd.
Watty, to my mind this depends on the buffet and on what service my server provides. At a high-end buffet, a server might take care of my drinks, check several times on how the meal is going, clear away plates and utensils once I use them, bring new utensils, refold my napkin each time I go to the buffet, etc.

At buffets like those I would certainty want to tip, and perhaps at a higher rate than the 10% my dad taught me was appropriate for buffets.

Andy.

student
Posts: 3723
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by student » Sat Sep 07, 2019 6:29 pm

Watty wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 5:20 pm
student wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:23 am
davebo wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 3:08 pm
Generally speaking, I tip like this:

-Movers are $20/person.
-Restaurants are 15-20%.
-Bars are probably just $1.00, whatever the bill is (assuming 2 drinks)
-Barbers usually $4 on a $16 hair cut, which is a little high now that I think about it.
-Furniture movers give $10.

I never tip housekeepers, mostly because I just don't think about it. I've heard people tip them $1/day per member of your family. That seems kind of high to me, but maybe you're making up for the vast majority that don't tip.

One thing I have an issue with is tipping based on the amount of the bill. Usually service should go up the more you spend, but then you have situations like when you're in Disneyworld. We were doing Free Dining and our bills would've been like $200 had we paid out of cash. The bill will mention that and then recommend that you tip 18-20%, which would mean something like a $45 tip for a buffet.
The tip for buffet is usually less. 10%. Emily Post tipping guide is a good starting point. https://emilypost.com/advice/general-tipping-guide/ This is what I follow except for housekeepers.
The idea of tipping at a buffet under normal circumstances is absurd.
Sometimes I go to cheap Chinese buffet that costs about $10. They bring drinks and bus the table, I think $1 is appropriate.

michaelingp
Posts: 196
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Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by michaelingp » Sat Sep 07, 2019 7:06 pm

What about fast casual where you order at the counter, and maybe they bring the food to your table? In the past, I never left a tip, even if you weren't expected to bus your own table.

Then, one time, I saw that somebody had left a buck. I talked to the bus person. I said, "Do people leave tips?" He said, "Not usually." But then he said something that has changed my tipping strategy ever since. He said, "But you know, if everybody who ate at this restaurant left just 25 cents, it would have a huge impact on my life."

So, now when I think of tipping, I don't think of it as like a little bonus, but as an act that can actually change people's lives.

Vanguard Fan 1367
Posts: 1077
Joined: Wed Feb 08, 2017 3:09 pm

Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by Vanguard Fan 1367 » Sat Sep 07, 2019 7:22 pm

michaelingp wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 7:06 pm
What about fast casual where you order at the counter, and maybe they bring the food to your table? In the past, I never left a tip, even if you weren't expected to bus your own table.

Then, one time, I saw that somebody had left a buck. I talked to the bus person. I said, "Do people leave tips?" He said, "Not usually." But then he said something that has changed my tipping strategy ever since. He said, "But you know, if everybody who ate at this restaurant left just 25 cents, it would have a huge impact on my life."

So, now when I think of tipping, I don't think of it as like a little bonus, but as an act that can actually change people's lives.
My wife tips 3 dollars at Panera where you order at the counter and then take your own order to the table and clean up after yourself. I think a little less on a 15 to 25 dollar meal is appropriate.

student
Posts: 3723
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2015 6:58 am

Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by student » Sat Sep 07, 2019 7:34 pm

Vanguard Fan 1367 wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 7:22 pm
michaelingp wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 7:06 pm
What about fast casual where you order at the counter, and maybe they bring the food to your table? In the past, I never left a tip, even if you weren't expected to bus your own table.

Then, one time, I saw that somebody had left a buck. I talked to the bus person. I said, "Do people leave tips?" He said, "Not usually." But then he said something that has changed my tipping strategy ever since. He said, "But you know, if everybody who ate at this restaurant left just 25 cents, it would have a huge impact on my life."

So, now when I think of tipping, I don't think of it as like a little bonus, but as an act that can actually change people's lives.
My wife tips 3 dollars at Panera where you order at the counter and then take your own order to the table and clean up after yourself. I think a little less on a 15 to 25 dollar meal is appropriate.
I don't tip at Panera.

criticalmass
Posts: 1149
Joined: Wed Feb 12, 2014 10:58 pm

Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by criticalmass » Sat Sep 07, 2019 10:05 pm

Watty wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 5:20 pm
student wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:23 am
davebo wrote:
Fri Sep 06, 2019 3:08 pm
Generally speaking, I tip like this:

-Movers are $20/person.
-Restaurants are 15-20%.
-Bars are probably just $1.00, whatever the bill is (assuming 2 drinks)
-Barbers usually $4 on a $16 hair cut, which is a little high now that I think about it.
-Furniture movers give $10.

I never tip housekeepers, mostly because I just don't think about it. I've heard people tip them $1/day per member of your family. That seems kind of high to me, but maybe you're making up for the vast majority that don't tip.

One thing I have an issue with is tipping based on the amount of the bill. Usually service should go up the more you spend, but then you have situations like when you're in Disneyworld. We were doing Free Dining and our bills would've been like $200 had we paid out of cash. The bill will mention that and then recommend that you tip 18-20%, which would mean something like a $45 tip for a buffet.
The tip for buffet is usually less. 10%. Emily Post tipping guide is a good starting point. https://emilypost.com/advice/general-tipping-guide/ This is what I follow except for housekeepers.
The idea of tipping at a buffet under normal circumstances is absurd.
So you don't think the bus boys (girls), drink staff. and servers who work for tips should earn anything because there is a buffet? Or it is "absurd" that they get paid? Nice. Instead, consider using Emily Post's buffet tipping recommendation, about 2/3 of full service tip. Busing your dirty plates and utensils, etc. is just as much effort when you eat at a buffet.

criticalmass
Posts: 1149
Joined: Wed Feb 12, 2014 10:58 pm

Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by criticalmass » Sat Sep 07, 2019 10:14 pm

Jags4186 wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 3:15 pm
criticalmass wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 9:12 am
My takeaway from the earlier post was that Disney still “suggests” a full service sized tip for a Disney buffet. I’ll stick with your Emily Post recommendation, but thanks Disney :) .

On the other hand, Disney tipped servers get stiffed from tips regularly from a large proportion of European and other non USA visitors. I’ve heard that more than once from former Disney restaurant employees who worked for tips but often nothing from overseas diners. That’s one reason why Disney is big on “recommended” and forced tips.
Great. So now we’re expected to tip more to make up for the others who don’t tip? Maybe I’ll join the no tipping faction and let everyone else pick up the slack :oops:
Not sure how "tipping more to make up for the others" is your takeaway. Consider what impacts your actions have on others. Disney's buffet tipping recommendation may be in the high side and they likely didn't program a specific buffet tipping recommendation percentage into their receipt printing, but you can still follow etiquette norms. It has a huge impact on the workers serving you and cleaning your dirty mess left behind as the workers are working for tips.

You can only impact what YOU do, not somebody else. When I see someone being boorish, whether cutting someone off in a queue or not tipping at a restaurant where workers work for tips, I still behave the best that *I* can.

HereToLearn
Posts: 488
Joined: Sat Mar 17, 2018 5:53 pm

Re: Did I commit a tipping faux pas?

Post by HereToLearn » Sat Sep 07, 2019 10:56 pm

michaelingp wrote:
Sat Sep 07, 2019 7:06 pm
What about fast casual where you order at the counter, and maybe they bring the food to your table? In the past, I never left a tip, even if you weren't expected to bus your own table.

Then, one time, I saw that somebody had left a buck. I talked to the bus person. I said, "Do people leave tips?" He said, "Not usually." But then he said something that has changed my tipping strategy ever since. He said, "But you know, if everybody who ate at this restaurant left just 25 cents, it would have a huge impact on my life."

So, now when I think of tipping, I don't think of it as like a little bonus, but as an act that can actually change people's lives.
Agree completely. That small amount of money will not impact my life, but can clearly help the person working for low pay.

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