What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

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4nursebee
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by 4nursebee » Sat Jan 19, 2019 6:27 pm

Cut trees down from your own land.
Mill the trees into rough cut lumber.
Assemble lumber into rustic covered bookcases, in the shape of ones form.
Dig a hole the legal depth.
Own tractor with lift.
Die
Family friends remove books, place cadaver in case.
Tractor lowers bookcase and covers with dirt.
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Mr.BB
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Mr.BB » Sat Jan 19, 2019 6:43 pm

We plan on being cremated, after services where people can say goodbye. However, I do believe in celebrating the life and I do love jokes and laughter so I told my wife if I go first that I want a party where people can have a good time. But they have to tell a joke to get into the party and joke to leave and there should be a hat full of jokes that a person can read if they don't have one.

"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!""
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NotWhoYouThink
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by NotWhoYouThink » Sat Jan 19, 2019 6:52 pm

Hmmm, I hadn't considered the body farm. That's an interesting idea.

We had a gathering in MIL/FIL's hometown at a local restaurant after they died. It was very low cost (how did I marry into a family of non-drinkers??) but lots of good stories were told and memories shared. We all agreed they both would have loved to have been there, which is a pretty good indication it was the right way to remember them.

I hope my celebration is a little more rollicking, but the executor is authorized to do as he/she sees fit.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Blueskies123 » Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:06 pm

lthenderson wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 2:02 pm
My mom died this past November, was cremated with remains put in the free cardboard box and had no services. I think the total cost was around $1800 and that included about $200 worth of obituaries posted in three newspapers. We are in the process of scattering her remains at various places she was fond so add another $200 in gas and call it $2000.
My 92-year-old dad had my 91-year-old mom cremated for $550. No service, cardboard box in his closet.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by pdavi21 » Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:16 pm

Blueskies123 wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:06 pm
lthenderson wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 2:02 pm
My mom died this past November, was cremated with remains put in the free cardboard box and had no services. I think the total cost was around $1800 and that included about $200 worth of obituaries posted in three newspapers. We are in the process of scattering her remains at various places she was fond so add another $200 in gas and call it $2000.
My 92-year-old dad had my 91-year-old mom cremated for $550. No service, cardboard box in his closet.
What a scam. Anyone know any tips for dying cheaply? Besides suicide (using a method that leaves no remains)...
"We spend a great deal of time studying history, which, let's face it, is mostly the history of stupidity." -Stephen Hawking

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TheTimeLord
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by TheTimeLord » Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:20 pm

Funerals are for the living not the dead. Allowing people to start the grieving process and share memories about the deceased. Often they bring together friends and family who haven't seen each other for years. I plan to provide them some nice food and drink while they socialize.
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Phineas J. Whoopee » Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:41 pm

I don't think Boglehead is a synonym for the least possible cost of everything. I do think it involves an aspect of insisting on value for money, but that relies on what's valued.

In terms of my own inevitable death, I've volunteered for whole-body donation including any organ or tissue harvesting that might be helpful, with any remainder being used for medical education or research, but really the issue is what the survivors require. I don't know that they would wish for a polished mahogany coffin to bury me in a hermetically-sealed concrete vault in a doomed attempt to prevent my physical remains from decaying, but it's their judgement about their own needs, not mine.

An elderly relative recently passed away. Whole-body donation was the agreed-on plan, but there was a medical reason I won't go into why it ended up being impossible. The reason was only discovered after death. We had to scramble to work out, and fund, an alternate plan. Time, in such a situation, is short.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Dottie57 » Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:54 pm

I think my parents had a great Boglehead plan for funeral.

All was prepurchased. Plot, casket paid for. All that needed to be paid for was the obituary, flowers and donation to church. Oops, a small luncheon was also provided when Dad died. Mom is still alive and kicking.

I will do same for my relatives.

Not cheap, but purchased without pressure. A real gift to my brother and me.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Uniballer » Sat Jan 19, 2019 9:15 pm

I told my wife and some friends that I would prefer if my body was left in the woods (on my property) for the scavengers to take care of.

One of my friends said, "Oh sure. That's great until the neighbors' dog comes home with your femur. That'll cause a ruckus."

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Post by Taylor Larimore » Sat Jan 19, 2019 9:32 pm

dm200:

I have made arrangement with the University of Miami to take my body for medical research. I understand that there will be no funeral costs.

It seems like the Boglehead thing to do: (1) Helping others; (2) Save money.

Best wishes.
Taylor
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by NotWhoYouThink » Sat Jan 19, 2019 9:37 pm

TheTimeLord wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:20 pm
Funerals are for the living not the dead. Allowing people to start the grieving process and share memories about the deceased. Often they bring together friends and family who haven't seen each other for years. I plan to provide them some nice food and drink while they socialize.
Sounds like a great plan. I hope it doesn't happen anytime soon.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by 2015 » Sat Jan 19, 2019 9:58 pm

My date with the oven has been prepaid for over a couple of decades when I had my first dance with the devil and death's door. My intention is to continue expanding living life so fiercely that my second dance with him will be akin to spontaneous combustion. This moment comes only once so there's only one chance to treasure it.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Toons » Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:10 pm

Cremation
Ashes in the hills of Tennessee
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by abuss368 » Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:11 pm

Shot into space like Mr. Spock!
John C. Bogle: "You simply do not need to put your money into 8 different mutual funds!" | | Disclosure: Three Fund Portfolio + U.S. & International REITs

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by abuss368 » Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:12 pm

Jokes aside, I am planning to have ashes spread in ocean. No desire to go in the ground.
John C. Bogle: "You simply do not need to put your money into 8 different mutual funds!" | | Disclosure: Three Fund Portfolio + U.S. & International REITs

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by LaurieAnnaT » Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:20 pm

My sweetie - a firm Boglehead - passed away in April. Per his wishes, he was cremated. There was a church visitation (fellow Bogleheads stopped by!) and a church memorial service. The church gave me the name of the florist they used and the beautiful floral arrangement was much less expensive than the florist we used for my parents' funerals (a different city). No urn - I'm going to spread my sweetie's ashes on some farm fields in Iowa.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by desiderium » Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:33 pm

littlebird wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 5:57 pm
Mingus wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 4:27 pm
Burial at sea.
I looked into that for my navy veteran (WWII) spouse when the time comes. The navy provides a burial of either the entire body or cremains for their own. You have to deliver the product to the port.
Burial at sea from a ferry is not uncommon in the Seattle area (note intact body not permitted):

Memorial Services

Advanced reservations are required for all memorials and must be made a minimum of five (5) business days in advance by utilizing our online form. Only one memorial per day/per route will be scheduled, so scheduling up to a month in advance is suggested during spring and summer seasons. Memorials will only be permitted during non-peak travel times (Monday - Friday between 10 a.m. and 1 p.m. and Saturday/Sunday prior to 10 a.m.) and only on the routes listed below:

-Seattle/Bremerton
-Seattle/Bainbridge
-Edmonds/Kingston
-Mukilteo/Clinton
-Anacortes/Friday Harbor/Orcas
-Port Townsend/Coupeville.

Ashes must be contained in a certified biodegradable container that can be dropped intact from a ferry. Such containers are sometimes referred to as “journey urns” and are designed to dissolve quickly after contact with water. A floral tribute may also be released but must contain only biodegradable material (no plastic or wire attachments or ribbons, etc.)

Memorials occur at the sole discretion of the vessels’ Captain and a scheduled memorial may not occur if a Captain determines it is not safe due to weather or other unforeseen operational issues. A memorial may be moved to another operating vessel or rescheduled.
Last edited by desiderium on Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by NYC_Guy » Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:34 pm

dm200 wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 1:23 pm
How might we apply the "Boglehead" philosophy to our funeral and burial plans/expenses?
Boglehead philosophy, in part, is to live below your means. We all have different means. So what, exactly, is your question?

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by TravelforFun » Sat Jan 19, 2019 11:04 pm

I signed on my driver license to donate my entire body and my family knows about it. I hope the state would take care of my remain.

TravelforFun

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by bryansmile » Sat Jan 19, 2019 11:48 pm

TheTimeLord wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 8:20 pm
Funerals are for the living not the dead. Allowing people to start the grieving process and share memories about the deceased. Often they bring together friends and family who haven't seen each other for years. I plan to provide them some nice food and drink while they socialize.
This.
I will let my children decide the best plan. But I expect to leave them a good amount of money, so funeral expenses, if any, are fully covered. But it'll be their decision, as I'll no longer be here, nor would I care.

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steve roy
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by steve roy » Sat Jan 19, 2019 11:53 pm

Burial arrangements?

Brown wrapping paper, twine, and a large dumpster in the dead of night ought to do just fine.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by mindboggling » Sat Jan 19, 2019 11:55 pm

Is it true that Boglehead coffins have a special pocket inside for our financial data?

That way we can make sure that our finely tuned, optimized portfolios keep running like a well-oiled machine. You can't trust the cloud, so use a memory stick or CD (encrypted).
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Gnirk » Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:06 am

Either donate to medical science, or direct cremation with a memorial later. My parents bought 4 cemetery plots when they were in their 20's ($5 per month payment plan), and each plot can take 2 urns.

Our plan: direct cremation, inurnment in the cemetery plots, and celebration of life afterwards for family and close friends.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Gnirk » Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:09 am

desiderium wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 10:33 pm
littlebird wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 5:57 pm
Mingus wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 4:27 pm
Burial at sea.
I looked into that for my navy veteran (WWII) spouse when the time comes. The navy provides a burial of either the entire body or cremains for their own. You have to deliver the product to the port.
Burial at sea from a ferry is not uncommon in the Seattle area (note intact body not permitted):

Memorial Services

Advanced reservations are required for all memorials and must be made a minimum of five (5) business days in advance by utilizing our online form. Only one memorial per day/per route will be scheduled, so scheduling up to a month in advance is suggested during spring and summer seasons. Memorials will only be permitted during non-peak travel times (Monday - Friday between 10 a.m. and 1 p.m. and Saturday/Sunday prior to 10 a.m.) and only on the routes listed below:

-Seattle/Bremerton
-Seattle/Bainbridge
-Edmonds/Kingston
-Mukilteo/Clinton
-Anacortes/Friday Harbor/Orcas
-Port Townsend/Coupeville.

Ashes must be contained in a certified biodegradable container that can be dropped intact from a ferry. Such containers are sometimes referred to as “journey urns” and are designed to dissolve quickly after contact with water. A floral tribute may also be released but must contain only biodegradable material (no plastic or wire attachments or ribbons, etc.)

Memorials occur at the sole discretion of the vessels’ Captain and a scheduled memorial may not occur if a Captain determines it is not safe due to weather or other unforeseen operational issues. A memorial may be moved to another operating vessel or rescheduled.
While riding the Ferry between Vashon (Tahlequah) and Pt. Defiance after visiting my mom, the ferry stopped mid-route, and the captain announced there would be a brief ceremony, dropping the container into Puget Sound,followed by roses.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Elric » Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:16 am

Well, it seems Viking funerals aren't legal, so there goes choice 1. I really like the idea of cremation with remains being put into fireworks, but while several companies offer that, it seems in the states you have to do that off the coast, which would get expensive and might limit attendance. So probably cremation, one or two spots in mind for spreading ashes, and definitely a celebration of life party.
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by S&L1940 » Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:21 am

whodidntante wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 2:13 pm
Is there a Ralph's around here?
Yeah, but, you gotta know which way the wind is blowing...

Dear wife and I have a family plot bought many years ago with in-laws. Otherwise we would have passed up the burial. Cremation will be less than $2k (each) including a room for a memorial service. Major outlay will be cost - ??? - of head and foot stones.
Don't it always seem to go * That you don't know what you've got * Till it's gone

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Doom&Gloom » Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:43 am

mindboggling wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 11:55 pm
Is it true that Boglehead coffins have a special pocket inside for our financial data?

That way we can make sure that our finely tuned, optimized portfolios keep running like a well-oiled machine. You can't trust the cloud, so use a memory stick or CD (encrypted).
I can trust the cloud. Just not sure I would be able to access it. 50/50 chance at best.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Munir » Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:05 pm

daytona084 wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 3:42 pm
It sure seems like the underlying theme in almost all of the posts so far is "Boglehead Funeral = Cheap". I beg to differ. I would say the Boglehead, having invested wisely and amassed a large nest egg, can have whatever funeral he or she wants, without regard to cost.
Agree. Moreover, remember that a memorial service (or funeral) are for friends and relatives to remember and commiserate with each other about the deceased in order to bring a sense of closure about the loss of someone dear. The deceased is not around anymore to pass judgment about what kind of memorial service it should be. Grieving, sharing, and "celebrating a life" are all significant events. I am disappointed that money seems to be dominating this discussion as if the Boglehead philosophy is strictly to be as stingy as possible which makes one feel virtuous. I call it "cheap". A sensible and non-ostentatious memorial service is really a service and a caring expression towards those left behind.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by VictoriaF » Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:12 pm

I'd like the news of my death to be posted in the Bogleheads, and a few people to reply that they will miss me.

Victoria
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by hoops777 » Sun Jan 20, 2019 1:34 pm

A boglehead funeral is when one dares to buy something that is not an index fund or believes in dividend stocks. :happy
K.I.S.S........so easy to say so difficult to do.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Jimmie » Sun Jan 20, 2019 2:47 pm

hoops777 wrote:
Sun Jan 20, 2019 1:34 pm
A boglehead funeral is when one dares to buy something that is not an index fund or believes in dividend stocks. :happy
Good one.

I was thinking that when Bogleheads die, they immediately lose their membership. They are no longer "staying the course". :P

NotWhoYouThink
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by NotWhoYouThink » Sun Jan 20, 2019 8:42 pm

I look at it not as living (or dying) below your means, but as managing costs, and not paying for things that don't benefit you or your family.

So having direct cremation or other low cost way of disposing of my remains in a low cost manner that does not endanger public safety sounds right. But paying for a party so my friends and family can get together and share memories and grieve or celebrate sounds like money well spent. I hope they have a rager.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by EdNorton » Sun Jan 20, 2019 8:47 pm

I told my wife I wanted cremated, she said how about Tuesday.
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by SrGrumpy » Sun Jan 20, 2019 9:37 pm

bryansmile wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 11:48 pm
I will let my children decide the best plan. But I expect to leave them a good amount of money, so funeral expenses, if any, are fully covered. But it'll be their decision, as I'll no longer be here, nor would I care.
Sounds like an unnecessary burden. What if they're not on the same page and/or paralyzed by grief? (Or, god forbid, too busy dancing in the streets?) I believe it took seven months - and doubtless plenty of lawyer$ - before James Brown's next-of-kin agreed on funeral arrangements.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by VictoriaF » Mon Jan 21, 2019 9:59 pm

One alternative is to get your body preserved until immortality technologies revitalize you and put you back in service. Take a look at a series of presentations at a Life Extension Advocacy Foundation (LEAF), https://www.leafscience.org/nyc-2018-videos/ . The results reported by the presenters are very encouraging.

Victoria
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by bryansmile » Mon Jan 21, 2019 10:15 pm

SrGrumpy wrote:
Sun Jan 20, 2019 9:37 pm
bryansmile wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 11:48 pm
I will let my children decide the best plan. But I expect to leave them a good amount of money, so funeral expenses, if any, are fully covered. But it'll be their decision, as I'll no longer be here, nor would I care.
Sounds like an unnecessary burden. What if they're not on the same page and/or paralyzed by grief? (Or, god forbid, too busy dancing in the streets?) I believe it took seven months - and doubtless plenty of lawyer$ - before James Brown's next-of-kin agreed on funeral arrangements.
Haha, I'll not be as rich as that Brown guy, and I trust my kids have been brought up properly. They will make the decision right for their mourning. They've known since a young age that we'll see each other again after death. so this parting is temporary.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by dm200 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 9:54 am

VictoriaF wrote:
Mon Jan 21, 2019 9:59 pm
One alternative is to get your body preserved until immortality technologies revitalize you and put you back in service. Take a look at a series of presentations at a Life Extension Advocacy Foundation (LEAF), https://www.leafscience.org/nyc-2018-videos/ . The results reported by the presenters are very encouraging.

Victoria
This woman's choice https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/arti ... times.html

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by VictoriaF » Tue Jan 22, 2019 10:32 am

dm200 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 9:54 am
VictoriaF wrote:
Mon Jan 21, 2019 9:59 pm
One alternative is to get your body preserved until immortality technologies revitalize you and put you back in service. Take a look at a series of presentations at a Life Extension Advocacy Foundation (LEAF), https://www.leafscience.org/nyc-2018-videos/ . The results reported by the presenters are very encouraging.

Victoria
This woman's choice https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/arti ... times.html
That's not quite the same. The videos from the LEAF conference describing new approaches to delaying and reversing mortality are convincing, at least to me. The conference was held in NYC and featured speakers from the financial industry investing in longevity companies. The true break-throughs will take time, and thus the body preservation is an option for those who won't live long enough to take advantage of them during their current lifespan.

Consider it as a Pascal's wager. If you get revived, you will get the most valuable benefit imaginable. If you don't, you will spend a part of your assets that you won't need after death, anyway.

Victoria
WINNER of the 2015 Boglehead Contest. | Every joke has a bit of a joke. ... The rest is the truth. (Marat F)

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by epoxyresin » Tue Jan 22, 2019 10:45 am

daytona084 wrote:
Sat Jan 19, 2019 3:42 pm
It sure seems like the underlying theme in almost all of the posts so far is "Boglehead Funeral = Cheap". I beg to differ. I would say the Boglehead, having invested wisely and amassed a large nest egg, can have whatever funeral he or she wants, without regard to cost.
Yeah, and you can't take it with you. I get the desire to pass on money to your progeny or good cause of your choice I guess, but a funeral will literally be the last option to spend your money.

I want a marching band to play "when the saints go marching in".

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by alfaspider » Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:15 am

All I can think of is the Folger's can from the Big Lebowski :mrgreen:

Image

In seriousness, the frugal way is to avoid the funeral home for anything other than what is strictly necessary. Cremate, and scatter ashes rather than having a burial plot. Hold the memorial outdoors or at home.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Broken Man 1999 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:16 am

Word of caution for those planning to leave their bodies for medical research, training, etc., just because you have offered up your body DOES NOT mean your body will be accepted.

Personally I think it is a wonderful thing to do, but have a backup plan in case you are faced with having to make alternate plans. Quick made plans are sometimes more costly.

DW's mother passed at our home, and she had made all the necessary arrangements to donate her body. I had periodically checked with the entity, and everything checked out fine. But, when the entity was called following her death, we received a recorded message that they had reached their limit in bodies, and could not accept her body at that time.

We had to scramble around to find a solution. Our solution was a cremation via funeral home. Bad solution. A direct cremation would have been a third, or half what was charged. When her cremains were returned, we had a gathering at our home, then returned to her previous hometown and had a memorial service there for her.

I think I am going to make it a tradition that when our wills are reviewed every year, to also ensure the places we have identified are still in business, check pricing, etc.

Broken Man 1999
“If I cannot drink Bourbon and smoke cigars in Heaven than I shall not go. " -Mark Twain

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by dm200 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:19 am

Broken Man 1999 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:16 am
Word of caution for those planning to leave their bodies for medical research, training, etc., just because you have offered up your body DOES NOT mean your body will be accepted.
Personally I think it is a wonderful thing to do, but have a backup plan in case you are faced with having to make alternate plans. Quick made plans are sometimes more costly.
DW's mother passed at our home, and she had made all the necessary arrangements to donate her body. I had periodically checked with the entity, and everything checked out fine. But, when the entity was called following her death, we received a recorded message that they had reached their limit in bodies, and could not accept her body at that time.
We had to scramble around to find a solution. Our solution was a cremation via funeral home. Bad solution. A direct cremation would have been a third, or half what was charged. When her cremains were returned, we had a gathering at our home, then returned to her previous hometown and had a memorial service there for her.
I think I am going to make it a tradition that when our wills are reviewed every year, to also ensure the places we have identified are still in business, check pricing, etc.
Broken Man 1999
Yes - you need to have a "backup" plan.

I do not understand the difference between "direct cremation" and "cremation via a funeral home"? I thought "direct cremation" is normally done through a funeral home?

Broken Man 1999
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Broken Man 1999 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:43 am

dm200 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:19 am
Broken Man 1999 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:16 am
Word of caution for those planning to leave their bodies for medical research, training, etc., just because you have offered up your body DOES NOT mean your body will be accepted.
Personally I think it is a wonderful thing to do, but have a backup plan in case you are faced with having to make alternate plans. Quick made plans are sometimes more costly.
DW's mother passed at our home, and she had made all the necessary arrangements to donate her body. I had periodically checked with the entity, and everything checked out fine. But, when the entity was called following her death, we received a recorded message that they had reached their limit in bodies, and could not accept her body at that time.
We had to scramble around to find a solution. Our solution was a cremation via funeral home. Bad solution. A direct cremation would have been a third, or half what was charged. When her cremains were returned, we had a gathering at our home, then returned to her previous hometown and had a memorial service there for her.
I think I am going to make it a tradition that when our wills are reviewed every year, to also ensure the places we have identified are still in business, check pricing, etc.
Broken Man 1999
Yes - you need to have a "backup" plan.

I do not understand the difference between "direct cremation" and "cremation via a funeral home"? I thought "direct cremation" is normally done through a funeral home?
The difference is the level of services you desire.

For a cremation via a funeral home, the service can include viewing, service, then cremation afterwards.

For a direct cremation, the crematory picks up the body, and the ashes are returned after some interval. Nothing else, pretty basic.

For MIL's case, the family had always planned for a gathering at our home, and return of ashes to her hometown for a memorial service via her membership in Order of Eastern Star (Masonic organization). Her ashes were scattered in a few locations, and bulk were placed on her father's grave. We opted not to pay $200 to have the grave opened, instead we used a garden trowel to dig a small hole.

I plan to do the same, direct cremation and some part of ashes on parent's graves in boyhood hometown. We will need the trowel again, it seems. :D

Celebration for the living at our home.

Wife's plans are similar.

Broken Man 1999
“If I cannot drink Bourbon and smoke cigars in Heaven than I shall not go. " -Mark Twain

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dm200
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by dm200 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:52 am

Broken Man 1999 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:43 am
dm200 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:19 am
Broken Man 1999 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:16 am
Word of caution for those planning to leave their bodies for medical research, training, etc., just because you have offered up your body DOES NOT mean your body will be accepted.
Personally I think it is a wonderful thing to do, but have a backup plan in case you are faced with having to make alternate plans. Quick made plans are sometimes more costly.
DW's mother passed at our home, and she had made all the necessary arrangements to donate her body. I had periodically checked with the entity, and everything checked out fine. But, when the entity was called following her death, we received a recorded message that they had reached their limit in bodies, and could not accept her body at that time.
We had to scramble around to find a solution. Our solution was a cremation via funeral home. Bad solution. A direct cremation would have been a third, or half what was charged. When her cremains were returned, we had a gathering at our home, then returned to her previous hometown and had a memorial service there for her.
I think I am going to make it a tradition that when our wills are reviewed every year, to also ensure the places we have identified are still in business, check pricing, etc.
Broken Man 1999
Yes - you need to have a "backup" plan.
I do not understand the difference between "direct cremation" and "cremation via a funeral home"? I thought "direct cremation" is normally done through a funeral home?
The difference is the level of services you desire.
For a cremation via a funeral home, the service can include viewing, service, then cremation afterwards.
For a direct cremation, the crematory picks up the body, and the ashes are returned after some interval. Nothing else, pretty basic.
For MIL's case, the family had always planned for a gathering at our home, and return of ashes to her hometown for a memorial service via her membership in Order of Eastern Star (Masonic organization). Her ashes were scattered in a few locations, and bulk were placed on her father's grave. We opted not to pay $200 to have the grave opened, instead we used a garden trowel to dig a small hole.
I plan to do the same, direct cremation and some part of ashes on parent's graves in boyhood hometown. We will need the trowel again, it seems. :D
Celebration for the living at our home.
Wife's plans are similar.
Broken Man 1999
Isn't (normally) direct cremation arranged by a funeral home? I know some funeral homes have a crematory on-site.

Yes - my father-in-law wanted cremation. My mother-in-law, though, had "the works" before the cremation - embalming, viewing, church funeral with casket - them cremation later (as required by state law).

Broken Man 1999
Posts: 2745
Joined: Wed Apr 08, 2015 11:31 am

Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Broken Man 1999 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 1:12 pm

dm200 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:52 am
Broken Man 1999 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:43 am
dm200 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:19 am
Broken Man 1999 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 11:16 am
Word of caution for those planning to leave their bodies for medical research, training, etc., just because you have offered up your body DOES NOT mean your body will be accepted.
Personally I think it is a wonderful thing to do, but have a backup plan in case you are faced with having to make alternate plans. Quick made plans are sometimes more costly.
DW's mother passed at our home, and she had made all the necessary arrangements to donate her body. I had periodically checked with the entity, and everything checked out fine. But, when the entity was called following her death, we received a recorded message that they had reached their limit in bodies, and could not accept her body at that time.
We had to scramble around to find a solution. Our solution was a cremation via funeral home. Bad solution. A direct cremation would have been a third, or half what was charged. When her cremains were returned, we had a gathering at our home, then returned to her previous hometown and had a memorial service there for her.
I think I am going to make it a tradition that when our wills are reviewed every year, to also ensure the places we have identified are still in business, check pricing, etc.
Broken Man 1999
Yes - you need to have a "backup" plan.
I do not understand the difference between "direct cremation" and "cremation via a funeral home"? I thought "direct cremation" is normally done through a funeral home?
The difference is the level of services you desire.
For a cremation via a funeral home, the service can include viewing, service, then cremation afterwards.
For a direct cremation, the crematory picks up the body, and the ashes are returned after some interval. Nothing else, pretty basic.
For MIL's case, the family had always planned for a gathering at our home, and return of ashes to her hometown for a memorial service via her membership in Order of Eastern Star (Masonic organization). Her ashes were scattered in a few locations, and bulk were placed on her father's grave. We opted not to pay $200 to have the grave opened, instead we used a garden trowel to dig a small hole.
I plan to do the same, direct cremation and some part of ashes on parent's graves in boyhood hometown. We will need the trowel again, it seems. :D
Celebration for the living at our home.
Wife's plans are similar.
Broken Man 1999
Isn't (normally) direct cremation arranged by a funeral home? I know some funeral homes have a crematory on-site.

Yes - my father-in-law wanted cremation. My mother-in-law, though, had "the works" before the cremation - embalming, viewing, church funeral with casket - them cremation later (as required by state law).
No, direct cremation doesn't have to be via funeral home. But, yes, some funeral homes arrange for cremation, including services, viewings, etc.

Here is a link for direct cremation:

https://affinitycremation.com/?useYB=2

Note also, even with direct cremation, there are additional services that are available, if desired. Looks like the basic cremation is $795.

Broken Man 1999
“If I cannot drink Bourbon and smoke cigars in Heaven than I shall not go. " -Mark Twain

michaeljc70
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by michaeljc70 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 1:32 pm

I want to be cremated and my ashes thrown anywhere. Somewhere I liked to visit would be nice, but I'm gone so who cares. I would also prefer a party (preferably at my home if possible) rather than a wake or funeral. A friend had requested a party in his home when he passed. He asked that everyone dress up, there were a few pictures of him, cocktails, food, etc. and it was very nice. I hate going to funerals/wakes and would like to spare others from going to mine and saving money is secondary.

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dm200
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by dm200 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 1:40 pm

michaeljc70 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 1:32 pm
I want to be cremated and my ashes thrown anywhere. Somewhere I liked to visit would be nice, but I'm gone so who cares. I would also prefer a party (preferably at my home if possible) rather than a wake or funeral. A friend had requested a party in his home when he passed. He asked that everyone dress up, there were a few pictures of him, cocktails, food, etc. and it was very nice. I hate going to funerals/wakes and would like to spare others from going to mine and saving money is secondary.
The receptions/repasts after funerals or memorial services at my place of worship are much like this (except for folks needing to dress up)

michaeljc70
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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by michaeljc70 » Tue Jan 22, 2019 1:43 pm

dm200 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 1:40 pm
michaeljc70 wrote:
Tue Jan 22, 2019 1:32 pm
I want to be cremated and my ashes thrown anywhere. Somewhere I liked to visit would be nice, but I'm gone so who cares. I would also prefer a party (preferably at my home if possible) rather than a wake or funeral. A friend had requested a party in his home when he passed. He asked that everyone dress up, there were a few pictures of him, cocktails, food, etc. and it was very nice. I hate going to funerals/wakes and would like to spare others from going to mine and saving money is secondary.
The receptions/repasts after funerals or memorial services at my place of worship are much like this (except for folks needing to dress up)
I am told things vary regionally too. I think in some places in the South receptions/wakes are sometimes held in homes whereas here (Chicago) I've never really heard of it being done. My friend I mentioned above also had a traditional wake/viewing/funeral at a funeral home.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by Ybsybs » Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:09 pm

Do the legwork of selecting whatever seems reasonable to you in advance so your survivors aren't trying to decide whether you'd have preferred the cherrywood or the mahogany casket while they are in the midst of grieving.

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Re: What is a Boglehead funeral/burial?

Post by OAG » Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:28 pm

Direct Cremation and delivery to Arlington National Cemetery. Already have a niche there as my DW is already there and there is ample room for me. Already have a Granddaughter there too along with several friends.
OAG=Old Army Guy. Retired CW4 USA (US Army) in 1979.

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