When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

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indexonlyplease
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by indexonlyplease » Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:05 am

The difference is when you use gray duck tape to hold your wallet together.

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aspirit
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by aspirit » Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:13 am

goodlifer wrote:
Sat Jul 14, 2018 9:56 am
aspirit wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 6:14 pm
As to the question,
I always saved 100% of what I did not spend.
goodlifer wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 9:16 am
When your passion for money clouds your judgement as to what is socially acceptable, you are a cheapskate. When you get more enjoyment from hoarding money than you do from spending or giving, you are a miser.
I Disagree Acting in socially acceptable manner, is still 'acting'.
Do you keep up with the joneses also?
When someone, say a retail cashier, a corner begger, etc. ask's me for a buck or contribution, I say no. Get a job, or just no.
Who cares whats socially acceptable? I do not. I do not act* out my life, I live my life, my way. Regrets? ...a few..sounds like that Sinatra's song eeh?

I guess i'm a curmudgeonly cheep miser.

Do you think the organizations sending you stick-on return addresses, pens, calculators, & useless whatnot, are not expecting a socially acceptable donation from you for that crap they cannot sell?
Do you think they are using the donations as they say?
I think you should do some research, more moneys been stolen or mis-allocated by charities than not. Good luck to you. jmho

Wow. Sounds like you took my post personal. All I can say is that if you see yourself in what I posted, then yes, you probably are a cheap miser, as you say. And no, I don't feel the need to do more research on what I think constitutes a cheapskate or a miser. Lol.
I in fact might be, however I do not judge myself by others opinions. I've purchased R.E primarily for its income, w/my sleeping in its vacant top/or bottom floor also, twice.
michaeljc70 wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:14 pm
Buying a house and renting out all the rooms (assuming not college age) and sleeping on the couch or in the basement is being a cheapskate. I read variances on both of these on FIRE sites.
goodlifer, I'd suggested you review where your donations to charities actually go, despite feeling good about the donation. The annual February Pink Breast Cancer charity nonsense in the USA a yr. or two back that thrived yr. after yr. till uncovered is one of many data points.
Good luck!
Time & tides wait for no one. A man has to know his limitations.

goodlifer
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by goodlifer » Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:39 am

aspirit wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:13 am
goodlifer wrote:
Sat Jul 14, 2018 9:56 am
aspirit wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 6:14 pm
As to the question,
I always saved 100% of what I did not spend.
goodlifer wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 9:16 am
When your passion for money clouds your judgement as to what is socially acceptable, you are a cheapskate. When you get more enjoyment from hoarding money than you do from spending or giving, you are a miser.
I Disagree Acting in socially acceptable manner, is still 'acting'.
Do you keep up with the joneses also?
When someone, say a retail cashier, a corner begger, etc. ask's me for a buck or contribution, I say no. Get a job, or just no.
Who cares whats socially acceptable? I do not. I do not act* out my life, I live my life, my way. Regrets? ...a few..sounds like that Sinatra's song eeh?

I guess i'm a curmudgeonly cheep miser.

Do you think the organizations sending you stick-on return addresses, pens, calculators, & useless whatnot, are not expecting a socially acceptable donation from you for that crap they cannot sell?
Do you think they are using the donations as they say?
I think you should do some research, more moneys been stolen or mis-allocated by charities than not. Good luck to you. jmho

Wow. Sounds like you took my post personal. All I can say is that if you see yourself in what I posted, then yes, you probably are a cheap miser, as you say. And no, I don't feel the need to do more research on what I think constitutes a cheapskate or a miser. Lol.
I in fact might be, however I do not judge myself by others opinions. I've purchased R.E primarily for its income, w/my sleeping in its vacant top/or bottom floor also, twice.
michaeljc70 wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:14 pm
Buying a house and renting out all the rooms (assuming not college age) and sleeping on the couch or in the basement is being a cheapskate. I read variances on both of these on FIRE sites.
goodlifer, I'd suggested you review where your donations to charities actually go, despite feeling good about the donation. The annual February Pink Breast Cancer charity nonsense in the USA a yr. or two back that thrived yr. after yr. till uncovered is one of many data points.
Good luck!
I never said anything about donating to charities or anything about real estate. For the record, I give directly to people and usually not charities, if that makes you feel better. I stand by what I said, regardless if it is a sore spot for you. Good day.

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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am

shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
"One should invest based on their need, ability and willingness to take risk - Larry Swedroe" Asking Portfolio Questions

Misciagno
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Misciagno » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:15 pm

munemaker wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:25 am
Frugal or cheap?
- using cents off coupons for gasoline and groceries?
- using credit card reward points programs
- using sign up bonuses for credit cards, bank accounts, brokerage accounts
- negotiating prices with contractors, for appliances, etc. rather than just accepting the quoted price
- taking your own snacks to the movie theater, ball game or concert (where you are supposed to buy there at inflated prices)
- going to a community college even if you were accepted at a private college
- not tipping for bar drinks at an event (not where you are sitting at the bar)
- regifting
- letting a subscription or membership expire to get the "sign up" offer again
- driving a 10 year old car when you are very wealthy
- not updating your bathroom and kitchen every X years
These all sound frugal to me, not cheap. It's just smart. I always tip, but only 10% on take out, not 20% like for a sit down meal. Updating a kitchen every "X" years just sounds like a total waste.

Misciagno
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Misciagno » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:17 pm

shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
Sounds like that dude totally screwed up. :?

david1082b
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by david1082b » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:22 pm

The groom wore an everyday business suit, the ring was a discount purchase through his own jewellery company and the reception was a meal at the Bonefish Grill, an America-wide seafood chain.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2006/ ... ndrewclark
Not the kind of man some would want to marry, he sounds so cheap! Still, perhaps he's the kind of guy who is less likely to run out of money than others. What do you value more, flashing the cash or being able to pay the bills?

Gnirk
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Gnirk » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:28 pm

david1082b wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:22 pm
The groom wore an everyday business suit, the ring was a discount purchase through his own jewellery company and the reception was a meal at the Bonefish Grill, an America-wide seafood chain.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2006/ ... ndrewclark
Not the kind of man some would want to marry, he sounds so cheap! Still, perhaps he's the kind of guy who is less likely to run out of money than others. What do you value more, flashing the cash or being able to pay the bills?

Gnirk
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Gnirk » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:29 pm

That groom sounds smart, to me, not cheap.

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munemaker
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by munemaker » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:36 pm

Misciagno wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:15 pm
Updating a kitchen every "X" years just sounds like a total waste.
I actually know several couples who do this. Corian countertops are in, so install those. Five years later, those are out and granite is in, so tear out the Corian and install granite. Remove the dark wood cabinets and install white painted cabinets. It is a way of life for some people. Never played that game and it makes me wonder if we are just being cheap.

randomguy
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by randomguy » Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:39 pm

Grt2bOutdoors wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am
shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have.:) Honestly we don't know if he was cheap. That could very well have been the peak of his cooking skills. Baking and a sauce is pretty fancy;)

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FIREchief
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by FIREchief » Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:10 pm

randomguy wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:39 pm
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am
shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have.:) Honestly we don't know if he was cheap. That could very well have been the peak of his cooking skills. Baking and a sauce is pretty fancy;)
+1 It may also have been the case that talldark&handsome was testing her to see if she was interested in him or the crap he could buy her. :P
I am not a lawyer, accountant or financial advisor. Any advice or suggestions that I may provide shall be considered for entertainment purposes only.

badProgrammer
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by badProgrammer » Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:47 pm

FIREchief wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:10 pm
randomguy wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:39 pm
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am
shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have.:) Honestly we don't know if he was cheap. That could very well have been the peak of his cooking skills. Baking and a sauce is pretty fancy;)
+1 It may also have been the case that talldark&handsome was testing her to see if she was interested in him or the crap he could buy her. :P
What was he testing the servers for?

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FIREchief
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by FIREchief » Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:52 pm

badProgrammer wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:47 pm
FIREchief wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:10 pm
randomguy wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:39 pm
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am
shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have.:) Honestly we don't know if he was cheap. That could very well have been the peak of his cooking skills. Baking and a sauce is pretty fancy;)
+1 It may also have been the case that talldark&handsome was testing her to see if she was interested in him or the crap he could buy her. :P
What was he testing the servers for?
touche'

(I think you're overanalyzing this; it was joke man! :sharebeer )
I am not a lawyer, accountant or financial advisor. Any advice or suggestions that I may provide shall be considered for entertainment purposes only.

brandy
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by brandy » Sun Jul 15, 2018 2:38 pm

Scrapr wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:36 pm
Exafchick wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 10:10 am
If you are washing paper plates to re-use, you might be a cheapskate!
My MIL uses plastic forks & knives. Then pops them in the dishwasher.
Cheap? Or Frugal?
I'm personally VERY frugal, basically out of necessity, real or perceived, except for some things, sometimes. I also go for somewhat better items when appropriate in some way.
I don't wash paper plates, I do stick the breakfast one in the fridge to be used for the next 1-2 meal(s). I HATE washing dishes so I often use paper plates. I did not know plastic forks & knives could go in the dishwasher. GOODIE! Because I do hand wash table ware because I need to... I do use regular plates at times, and those go into the dishwasher. When the dw is filled, I run tap water into gallon jugs to both heat the water to dw temp, rather than running it down the drain, and to use for other things: water plants, wash the floor, etc. It takes 1.5 gallons to get hot.

When I started learning to draw and paint, I used scraps: backs of envelopes, junk mail, paperboard, etc. I HAVE decent-good drawing paper, but I thought it wasteful as my skills were non-existent.
Only recently have I quit the envelopes and trifold paper, but for many things still recycle bond for practice. I also had a few sketch books, barely used. Recently I was given a lightly used one, and I suddenly felt a change in me, and I am using that one, instead of bond, paperboard or even cardboard.

I do carefully watch my funds, due to age, health, future needs, but when in the area, I will stop at SEE'S CANDIES though that's probably the worst place in the world for me to go. I occasionally buy BoarsHead or similar instead of not BoarsHead. I just hired an occasional yard man, maybe found an occasional handyman, and am still looking for a housecleaner.
I probably won't buy more drawing/painting supplies because I have more than I can use in the rest of my life, but I'd love to have colored graphite blocks and a 9XXB drawing pencil and maybe a few other things.

I tithe + regularly. Regularly means last or first of the month, when bills are paid.

bltn
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by bltn » Sun Jul 15, 2018 2:42 pm

This is an a topic eliciting some heartfelt responses. Obviously a lot of different opinions on the line between miserly and frugal.

Apparently there are many different ideas about saving money and feeling good about yourself. Those are the characteristics typical of most of the Bogleheads.

badProgrammer
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by badProgrammer » Sun Jul 15, 2018 3:04 pm

FIREchief wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:52 pm
badProgrammer wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:47 pm
FIREchief wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:10 pm
randomguy wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:39 pm
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am


LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have.:) Honestly we don't know if he was cheap. That could very well have been the peak of his cooking skills. Baking and a sauce is pretty fancy;)
+1 It may also have been the case that talldark&handsome was testing her to see if she was interested in him or the crap he could buy her. :P
What was he testing the servers for?
touche'

(I think you're overanalyzing this; it was joke man! :sharebeer )
:beer

channtheman
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by channtheman » Sun Jul 15, 2018 3:39 pm

ddurrett896 wrote:
Sat Jul 14, 2018 6:43 pm
Frugal spends money base on value, not cost.
Cheapskate spends money based on cost, not value.

My bro in law buys $150 used appliances on Craigslist constantly. He’s cheap.

I spent $3,000 on a quality fridge that will last me longer and much more efficient. I did but it from an employee discount site AND waitied until their July 4th sale, lowering the cost to around $1,800. I’m frugal.

To be, you cross the line when you put $$ before value/benefit.
Interesting... I thought I was very clever (and frugal!) by purchasing my clothes washer and dryer pair off Craigslist for $150. They were 8 years old and worked great for 3 years until my wife and I bought a home that had them there already so we gave the washer to my sister and the dryer to Goodwill.

New appliances don't necessarily last longer than old ones and the efficiency argument is a bit overstated, IMO, as I'm saving old units from a landfill. It's a wash.

Yes, the reason I buy a cheap, used appliance is mostly due to cost. But what am I really gaining in value by spending 10-20x that on a brand new one?

I suppose everyone's opinions of frugal vs. cheap really are different!

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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Sun Jul 15, 2018 3:57 pm

FIREchief wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:10 pm
randomguy wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:39 pm
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am
shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have.:) Honestly we don't know if he was cheap. That could very well have been the peak of his cooking skills. Baking and a sauce is pretty fancy;)
+1 It may also have been the case that talldark&handsome was testing her to see if she was interested in him or the crap he could buy her. :P
Guilty :wink:, did that once - one didn't like my fashion sense and then made the comment that I could not afford to buy her dinner. Buh-bye. But that doesn't appear to be the case with the OP of this post, she owned a condo, the date appeared to "rent his lifestyle".
"One should invest based on their need, ability and willingness to take risk - Larry Swedroe" Asking Portfolio Questions

daveydoo
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by daveydoo » Sun Jul 15, 2018 3:59 pm

Gnirk wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:29 pm
That groom sounds smart, to me, not cheap.
+1. I wore my (one) suit. Bought a new tie, though! Future-wife wore a second-hand dress -- with white-satin bedroom slippers since if she were a quarter-inch taller, the dress would be too short. Her sister beaded the tops so they looked really nice! We had the reception we could afford, with the people we wanted to celebrate with.

Maybe the groom in that piece was rich and cheap -- I didn't read it. But broke and cheap kinda go together. I can't believe the destructive expectations we have set up for soon-to-be-married couples. Look up median wedding cost.
"I mean, it's one banana, Michael...what could it cost? Ten dollars?"

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munemaker
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by munemaker » Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:19 pm

Bogleheads in general seem to have a disdain for spending money on wedding celebrations. We were the exceptions for that, for ourselves and our kids.

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MikeWillRetire
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by MikeWillRetire » Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:21 pm

When you use duct tape to extend the life of your paper lunch bag. I worked with a guy who actually did this.

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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:25 pm

munemaker wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:19 pm
Bogleheads in general seem to have a disdain for spending money on wedding celebrations. We were the exceptions for that, for ourselves and our kids.
We spent, but in a "frugal" manner. You don't have to be extravagant to treat your guests with hospitality.
"One should invest based on their need, ability and willingness to take risk - Larry Swedroe" Asking Portfolio Questions

Grt2bOutdoors
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:26 pm

MikeWillRetire wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:21 pm
When you use duct tape to extend the life of your paper lunch bag. I worked with a guy who actually did this.
How about a co-worker who offers tea and then proceeds to reuse a "used" tea bag? :oops:
"One should invest based on their need, ability and willingness to take risk - Larry Swedroe" Asking Portfolio Questions

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Doom&Gloom
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Doom&Gloom » Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:27 pm

My MIL has walked that tightrope for years. She broke a crown Friday night and called DW to ask her to bring her some SuperGlue because she thought she could fix it herself without going to the dentist.

DW is driving MIL to her dentist Monday morning to save MIL's frugal self from her cheapskate self :oops:

daveydoo
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by daveydoo » Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:38 pm

munemaker wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:19 pm
Bogleheads in general seem to have a disdain for spending money on wedding celebrations....
* disdain for spending money you don't have. If you can afford it, go to town. The "floor" for wedding spending has increased by a factor of ten in my fairly recent memory.
"I mean, it's one banana, Michael...what could it cost? Ten dollars?"

BarbK
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by BarbK » Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:51 pm

munemaker wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:25 am
Frugal or cheap?
- using cents off coupons for gasoline and groceries?
- using credit card reward points programs
- using sign up bonuses for credit cards, bank accounts, brokerage accounts
- negotiating prices with contractors, for appliances, etc. rather than just accepting the quoted price
- taking your own snacks to the movie theater, ball game or concert (where you are supposed to buy there at inflated prices) CHEAPSKATE
- going to a community college even if you were accepted at a private college
- not tipping for bar drinks at an event (not where you are sitting at the bar)
- regifting - TACKY and CHEAPSKATE
- letting a subscription or membership expire to get the "sign up" offer again
- driving a 10 year old car when you are very wealthy
- not updating your bathroom and kitchen every X years
Except for Regifting and taking your own snack to an event, I think most of these are frugal.

BarbK
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by BarbK » Sun Jul 15, 2018 5:05 pm

brandy wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 2:38 pm
...I did not know plastic forks & knives could go in the dishwasher. GOODIE! Because I do hand wash table ware because I need to... I do use regular plates at times, and those go into the dishwasher. When the dw is filled, I run tap water into gallon jugs to both heat the water to dw temp, rather than running it down the drain, and to use for other things: water plants, wash the floor, etc. It takes 1.5 gallons to get hot.
We do something similar to this, we had to have our house replumbed due to recurring leaks in the copper pipes. The new piping is in the attic so half the year we get solar showers and the other half it takes forever for the water to get hot. I tried capturing the water with the home depot orange buckets to use on my garden, but it was too much of a drag carrying it downstairs. For the last few years, we partially fill up the washing machine to get the water hot. Then we stop it and take showers. On the 2nd fill (heat) we do the laundry and never let the water sit overnight.

I don't know if it is a matter of cheapness, being frugal or just trying not to be wasteful.

shell921
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by shell921 » Sun Jul 15, 2018 5:24 pm

FIREchief wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:10 pm
randomguy wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:39 pm
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am
shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have.:) Honestly we don't know if he was cheap. That could very well have been the peak of his cooking skills. Baking and a sauce is pretty fancy;)
+1 It may also have been the case that talldark&handsome was testing her to see if she was interested in him or the crap he could buy her. :P
Firechief- I guess it wasn't that he was "cheap" that turned me off - it was that I came to view him as totally lacking empathy
for the wait staff !!
Refusing to tip repeatedly caused me to be embarrassed FOR HIM. This refusal to tip also
demonstrated lack of social awareness in my opinion. I wasn't expecting him to be a fancy cook but he
INVITED me to his place and he could have gotten some nice take out food ahead of time and served some nice wine.
I wasn't going to judge his cooking skills or lack thereof.
Thinking ahead and getting take out & wine would have shown some EFFORT on his part. Instead it was a few fish sticks and some catsup. I guess I felt like he
didn't think I was worth even half the trouble I went to for him. Also, when I invite someone to my home I want to be gracious
and have whomever feel like they were worth making an EFFORT of some sort for.

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FIREchief
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by FIREchief » Sun Jul 15, 2018 5:37 pm

shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 5:24 pm
FIREchief wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 1:10 pm
randomguy wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 12:39 pm
Grt2bOutdoors wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:59 am
shell921 wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:58 am
Before I met my husband I had a few dates with a guy I thought I was starting to like.
He had a good job, he was tall, dark and handsome and had a good personality. He did not tip
at ANY of the restaurants we visited and I was shocked and ended up leaving the tips myself.
Against my better judgement, I invited him to my condo for dinner for our 5th date.
I served a very nice meal on good china and the table had a tablecloth, cloth napkins, flowers, candles and
I served good wine. The next date he invited me to his place for "dinner". The meal was
Mrs Paul's fish sticks and the catsup bottle on the table. That was the last straw.
I thought no way can I be around a cheap man.
LOL, thanks for the laugh. Tall, dark, handsome, good personality does not overcome cheapness and being a jerk. At least he did not take you out for a hot dog at the local stand!
It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have.:) Honestly we don't know if he was cheap. That could very well have been the peak of his cooking skills. Baking and a sauce is pretty fancy;)
+1 It may also have been the case that talldark&handsome was testing her to see if she was interested in him or the crap he could buy her. :P
Firechief- I guess it wasn't that he was "cheap" that turned me off - it was that I came to view him as totally lacking empathy
for the wait staff !!
Refusing to tip repeatedly caused me to be embarrassed FOR HIM. This refusal to tip also
demonstrated lack of social awareness in my opinion. I wasn't expecting him to be a fancy cook but he
INVITED me to his place and he could have gotten some nice take out food ahead of time and served some nice wine.
I wasn't going to judge his cooking skills or lack thereof.
Thinking ahead and getting take out & wine would have shown some EFFORT on his part. Instead it was a few fish sticks and some catsup. I guess I felt like he
didn't think I was worth even half the trouble I went to for him. Also, when I invite someone to my home I want to be gracious
and have whomever feel like they were worth making an EFFORT of some sort for.
Yeah, I get that. As I mentioned earlier I was really just interjecting my own form of humor into this already silly thread. :D

I certainly agree that stiffing the wait staff is one of the few things in this thread that is clearly just being a "cheapskate," with a heavy negative connotation. Also, cheap as I may be, I would never serve my date who I invited over fish sticks and ketchup. Chinese takeout and a box of wine? Maybe...… As long as the food was good. I would probably have pored the wine into a nice glass carafe though! :beer

I really don't know about any of this, as my wife and I have been together since long before either of us could afford anything, so there is absolutely no "conflict of lifestyles." :sharebeer
I am not a lawyer, accountant or financial advisor. Any advice or suggestions that I may provide shall be considered for entertainment purposes only.

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FIREchief
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by FIREchief » Sun Jul 15, 2018 5:42 pm

BarbK wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:51 pm
munemaker wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:25 am
Frugal or cheap?
- using cents off coupons for gasoline and groceries?
- using credit card reward points programs
- using sign up bonuses for credit cards, bank accounts, brokerage accounts
- negotiating prices with contractors, for appliances, etc. rather than just accepting the quoted price
- taking your own snacks to the movie theater, ball game or concert (where you are supposed to buy there at inflated prices) CHEAPSKATE
- going to a community college even if you were accepted at a private college
- not tipping for bar drinks at an event (not where you are sitting at the bar)
- regifting - TACKY and CHEAPSKATE
- letting a subscription or membership expire to get the "sign up" offer again
- driving a 10 year old car when you are very wealthy
- not updating your bathroom and kitchen every X years
Except for Regifting and taking your own snack to an event, I think most of these are frugal.
If you're regifting to a loved one, and know of a more appropriate gift, then yes, CHEAP.

OTHO, if you're regifting to somebody you don't really like, then I would call it frugal and highly approve of such behavior. :sharebeer

If I even still went to movies in a theatre, and wanted a snack, then I would absolutely stuff my wife's purse (would probably have to make room beside the snacks she already stuffed in there).

Signed,

CHEAPchief
I am not a lawyer, accountant or financial advisor. Any advice or suggestions that I may provide shall be considered for entertainment purposes only.

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Doom&Gloom
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Doom&Gloom » Sun Jul 15, 2018 6:10 pm

BarbK wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 4:51 pm
munemaker wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 10:25 am
Frugal or cheap?
- using cents off coupons for gasoline and groceries?
- using credit card reward points programs
- using sign up bonuses for credit cards, bank accounts, brokerage accounts
- negotiating prices with contractors, for appliances, etc. rather than just accepting the quoted price
- taking your own snacks to the movie theater, ball game or concert (where you are supposed to buy there at inflated prices) CHEAPSKATE
- going to a community college even if you were accepted at a private college
- not tipping for bar drinks at an event (not where you are sitting at the bar)
- regifting - TACKY and CHEAPSKATE
- letting a subscription or membership expire to get the "sign up" offer again
- driving a 10 year old car when you are very wealthy
- not updating your bathroom and kitchen every X years
Except for Regifting and taking your own snack to an event, I think most of these are frugal.
The same two items jumped out at me as cheapskate. I would put an asterisk by community college vs private college as there would be far more factors involved with that choice AFAIC.

exit_r
Posts: 41
Joined: Tue Dec 29, 2015 9:25 am

Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by exit_r » Sun Jul 15, 2018 6:25 pm

Rupert wrote:
Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:15 am
I define a cheapskate as someone who frequently takes advantage of the generosity of others but never reciprocates.
+1

Doctor Rhythm
Posts: 166
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Doctor Rhythm » Sun Jul 15, 2018 7:07 pm

indexonlyplease wrote:
Sun Jul 15, 2018 11:05 am
The difference is when you use gray duck tape to hold your wallet together.
Unless you're a total barbarian, always choose duct tape that matches the color of your accessories.

Geno
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Joined: Fri Feb 26, 2016 1:19 pm

Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by Geno » Sun Jul 15, 2018 7:11 pm

When you use wrinkled newspaper instead of toilet paper, and newspaper is from your neighbor's recycling bin.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.

totallystudly
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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by totallystudly » Sun Jul 15, 2018 8:56 pm

It is amazing how far good looks get you in life. 6 dates being a cheapskate isn't an experience many guys have
He wasn't that good looking. Good looking guys don't go on dates, IJS. They meet for Netflix and chill.

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Re: When does frugal cross the line to cheapskate?

Post by LadyGeek » Sun Jul 15, 2018 9:40 pm

This thread has run its course and is locked (below acceptable threshold). See: Personal Consumer Issues
Note that this subforum has a much lower threshold for locking or removing posts than the financial and investing subforums. In general, controversial, offensive, pointless, divisive or mean-spirited posts or topics may be locked, edited or deleted (with or without notice) at the discretion of the moderating staff even if they do not otherwise violate forum policies
This thread is now in the Personal Consumer Issues forum (how you spend your money and your time). It would also have been locked in the Personal Finance forum - where it was moved from.
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