Nanny in Boston

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bostondan
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Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Sat Oct 01, 2016 12:34 pm

I'm sorry if this thread ends up repeating topics previously discussed. I attempted to search, but did not find anything quite matching my questions. I also searched Google, but the sites I found did not seem particularly reliable.

We are planning to hire a nanny in Boston (we are located near Fenway Park if that matters) starting in January 2017. Our daughter will be 5 months old at that time. We will need someone 30-40 hours/week from January to July, then 40-50 hours/week indefinitely after that.

1. What is a fare rate in your opinion (doing it the legit way, not under-the-table) for the following situations. Obviously this is somewhat subjective:
  1. Twenty-two year old recent college graduate, studied education, moving to Boston. Has only worked part-time in daycare and babysitting. Never officially nannied before. She seems great based on first-impression, and has good references.
  2. Twenty-six year old with significant experience. Has excellent references. Seems very capable. Will be bringing her own six-month old child to work. I wonder how bringing her child would affect the rate?
  3. Forty-year old with even more experience. Good references. Will NOT be bringing any children to work.
2. What do you do if your preferred nanny wants to be paid under-the-table? The person in scenario B above wants to be paid under-the-table because she is on her husband's insurance. I'm not morally opposed to it, but I generally like to do things the right way, pay my share of taxes, and my wife is a lawyer and it seems risky (though honestly most of my colleagues do it that way). Do you just not offer them the job? Do you offer it as an over-the-table job? I worry that she will take it out of desperation for a job and then just quit after finding a different under-the-table job.

3. Surprisingly, I have found that many of the people we interviewed are opposed to vaccinations and are even proud of this. This seems inappropriate when dealing with newborns. I know there are opinions about this that differ from mine, and respect that, but I will not have an unvaccinated nanny. Am I legally allowed to require vaccination?

4. What kind of benefits would the BH community recommend offering to a nanny? How much vacation time? Sick time? Holidays?

I just want to find a nanny that takes work seriously and that is happy to be working with us. I am not trying to penny-pinch, but also do not want to get taken advantage of by paying more than would be considered appropriate. Thanks in advance for any opinions.
“There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” - Elie Wiesel

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Mudpuppy » Sat Oct 01, 2016 1:31 pm

I don't have any feedback about Boston, but with respects to item #2, any discussion of avoiding laws is really against forum policy. And, in my opinion, it is best to keep all such transactions legal, so only make "over-the-table" offers. You want fully legal employees working in your household. Just consider what might happen if an "under-the-table" nanny slipped and fell in your house. Just because your colleagues are gambling with the law, doesn't mean you should.

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bostondan
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Sat Oct 01, 2016 2:22 pm

Mudpuppy wrote:I don't have any feedback about Boston, but with respects to item #2, any discussion of avoiding laws is really against forum policy. And, in my opinion, it is best to keep all such transactions legal, so only make "over-the-table" offers. You want fully legal employees working in your household. Just consider what might happen if an "under-the-table" nanny slipped and fell in your house. Just because your colleagues are gambling with the law, doesn't mean you should.
Yes, I definitely plan to only offer the position as over-the-table, or whatever the appropriate term is for doing it legally. I only suggested that I wasn't morally opposed to it to say that I'm not judging others who do it, but not that I would do it myself. Also, my question is more about thoughts on dealing with a nanny who requests to be under-the-table. I fear that the person would take the job but then be unhappy and leave, as I believe happened to someone in another thread on BH.

Also, if anybody has any references for nannies in the Boston area, please let us know. Amazingly we have had two not show up for their interviews, one was over an hour late, another talked at length about wanting to do under-the-table to avoid going into credit card debt (not sure how that applies), and several have been aggressive anti-vaxxers. Despite very nice looking resumes, it has been difficult to find a fairly normal person.
“There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” - Elie Wiesel

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Ninnie » Sat Oct 01, 2016 4:25 pm

#2 wants to be paid under the table AND is bringing her own child to work who may or may not be vaccinated? NOPE.

Choose #1 or #3.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Miakis » Sat Oct 01, 2016 5:13 pm

I'm a little confused about how being paid legally affects her status as insured under her husband's plan - unless they're planning to game ACA subsidies. Offer the position as a legal position. But frankly, I'm not sure I'd hire a nanny who is bringing her own baby. While it may be attractive from a social/play situation, I would be concerned that her attention would be more focused on her own baby, whom she is parenting full-time, while your child is the kid she "babysits."

There's additional instability there, because babies get sick - every time her baby gets sick, your baby will get sick (and vice versa), and she'll need time off to deal with her sick baby, while you have limited options with your sick baby.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by boomer » Sat Oct 01, 2016 5:33 pm

I would not do under the table. IRS rules require a 1099 and I personally would not want to risk it. Also, if I'm not mistaken there is a tax deduction for childcare.

I don't know why you could not require a vaccinated nanny. It is not a protected class.

The other thing I question about #2 is her baby she is bringing is almost the same age as your baby. Seems overwhelming. Also what will happen if her baby gets sick? Seems like your child would get every illness that her child does.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Sat Oct 01, 2016 5:41 pm

Thank you for all the valuable input.
Miakis wrote:I'm not sure I'd hire a nanny who is bringing her own baby. While it may be attractive from a social/play situation, I would be concerned that her attention would be more focused on her own baby, whom she is parenting full-time, while your child is the kid she "babysits."
My wife just brought up this point. I think it is a good one. We will not be hiring choice B.

Now we just have to decide whether we want to take a "risk" on choice A who is moving to Boston. We're worried she is a flight-risk because she is new to the city. I suppose we can always just find a new nanny, but this process has been difficult.
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ResearchMed
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by ResearchMed » Sat Oct 01, 2016 5:48 pm

bostondan wrote:Thank you for all the valuable input.
Miakis wrote:I'm not sure I'd hire a nanny who is bringing her own baby. While it may be attractive from a social/play situation, I would be concerned that her attention would be more focused on her own baby, whom she is parenting full-time, while your child is the kid she "babysits."
My wife just brought up this point. I think it is a good one. We will not be hiring choice B.

Now we just have to decide whether we want to take a "risk" on choice A who is moving to Boston. We're worried she is a flight-risk because she is new to the city. I suppose we can always just find a new nanny, but this process has been difficult.
Why is she moving to Boston?
Surely it's not because of a new job!
And who knows how well "full time child care" - through good and not-so-good - will suit her?

Is there something about the more experienced/referenced C that you didn't like?
On first glance, and of course without meeting her, it seems this is what she *wants* to do, and is good at it.

And if you check the recent reference(s) - which you *certainly* should do - they may share pay information history with you.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Yiewsley » Sat Oct 01, 2016 6:15 pm

My daughter just left a nanny job (not in Boston - in a major city that is a bit LCOL). She has 10 years of experience and is 32. She made $18.00 an hour and they paid for part of her health insurance. And they also contributed something towards an IRA I think. She got 2 weeks of paid vacation. This was above board. I would expect you would have to pay someone more based on how expensive it is to live in Boston.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Sat Oct 01, 2016 6:17 pm

ResearchMed wrote: Is there something about the more experienced/referenced C that you didn't like?
On first glance, and of course without meeting her, it seems this is what she *wants* to do, and is good at it.
The problem is that unfortunately person C is fictional, while options A and B are real. It has been very difficult to find someone like option C. I put her in that list only to see what people felt was an appropriate rate for a qualified nanny without any major issues.
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by ResearchMed » Sat Oct 01, 2016 6:49 pm

bostondan wrote:
ResearchMed wrote: Is there something about the more experienced/referenced C that you didn't like?
On first glance, and of course without meeting her, it seems this is what she *wants* to do, and is good at it.
The problem is that unfortunately person C is fictional, while options A and B are real. It has been very difficult to find someone like option C. I put her in that list only to see what people felt was an appropriate rate for a qualified nanny without any major issues.
Oh, pesky little detail like that :D

Have you contacted any agencies in Boston?

Chances are there will be extra costs for that, but... it's the care of your chlld/ren. Not much is more important.

Someone just starting out may be excellent. However, I'd rather they "practice" elsewhere.

One thing I *always* did for regular babysitters was the first time I had them stay, I told them I'd be home something like 11pm, and maybe asked them to start at say, 7pm.
Then, at 8:30 or 9 or such, I showed up back unannounced with a cover story that the friends couldn't get tickets to <whatever> after all... or someone got sick, etc., planning to pay for all the time scheduled.

All was well except once.
Came home and found the female sitter in the master bedroom bed, with unexpected/unknown boyfriend. :shock:
At least children were asleep in their own room.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Afty » Sat Oct 01, 2016 7:05 pm

Re: vacation. We gave our nanny paid vacation when we were also on vacation. We guaranteed at least 3 weeks per year, and gave her >30 days notice so she could try to plan a vacation of her own. If she wanted to take vacation at another time, that was unpaid.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Sat Oct 01, 2016 7:26 pm

ResearchMed wrote:Have you contacted any agencies in Boston?
Not directly, but several friends reported mediocre experiences and said they were not necessarily worth the cost. Perhaps others have had better experiences.

My work gives me a free care.com subscription so we posted the job listing there. I got a huge number of applications. Given the quantity of applications, I assumed that we would be able to find a qualified candidate. It has been difficult. I am sure there are many excellent nannies out there, but I seem to not be great at finding them so far.

I would be happy to receive recommendations to specific agencies in Boston or references to nannies, though probably that would be best suited as a PM rather than posting in this thread.
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by prudent » Sat Oct 01, 2016 7:36 pm

I know there's a bias against nannies bringing a child of their own but I wonder if it's justified. I only know one nanny, and she has an 18-month-old toddler. She just finished up a year-long nanny gig with a couple who have moved to another city. They told her they had concerns at the start but after seeing how much she worked with their 3-year-old (reading, learning colors, etc.) they said they'd be amazed if they could find another nanny as good as she is. Wrote her an amazing reference. But now she is having a hard time landing a new gig where she's allowed to bring her own child. She works for below-market wage and has a degree in child development but she's finding people have a real reluctance to allow a nanny to bring her own child.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Sat Oct 01, 2016 7:38 pm

prudent wrote:I know there's a bias against nannies bringing a child of their own but I wonder if it's justified. I only know one nanny, and she has an 18-month-old toddler. She just finished up a year-long nanny gig with a couple who have moved to another city. They told her they had concerns at the start but after seeing how much she worked with their 3-year-old (reading, learning colors, etc.) they said they'd be amazed if they could find another nanny as good as she is. Wrote her an amazing reference. But now she is having a hard time landing a new gig where she's allowed to bring her own child. She works for below-market wage and has a degree in child development but she's finding people have a real reluctance to allow a nanny to bring her own child.
Thank you for this perspective. I think if the nanny we interviewed was okay being over-the-table we would consider her more strongly. That is the main issue for us.
“There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” - Elie Wiesel

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by ram » Sat Oct 01, 2016 8:39 pm

A friend of ours moved from rural midwest to Boston. They paid more to have their old nanny (proven good worker) move to Boston, live with them and pay for occasional trips back to midwest . This was apparently cheaper than finding a new one in Boston.

Many years ago a lady did household chores for us. Many years later my wife's niece needed a babysitter. It was cheaper to have this lady move from a low cost of living area to a HCOL area. She got a substantial bump in pay to move. Most of the food, shelter etc was covered by the host family resulting in substantial saving rate for this worker. My wife assured the nanny that her niece would treat her well.

Wonder if anything along these lines is possible if you do not find a satisfactory applicant in Boston and have any family living in a LCOL area.
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by ThinkingRunner » Sat Oct 01, 2016 8:50 pm

We've had an amazing nanny in the Boston area for almost 4 years now. She has been watching our two kids since they were infants. We started at $20/hour and are now at $22/hour. We pay on the books, which for an 8.5 hour day does make it comparable or slightly more expensive than high quality daycare centers. But the convenience of no pickups/drops is great. The Massachusetts DOL formalities are annoying, though.

We provide 2 weeks paid vacation plus 8 paid holidays. Any other time off is unpaid. We pay both parts of the payroll taxes. We provide her a W2 but she is responsible for her own withholding.

I would not get a nanny who has young kids of her own. There is just way too much unpredictability and the last thing you want is a nanny who has to take days off to care for her sick kids when you have that important meeting at work.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by randomguy » Sat Oct 01, 2016 9:18 pm

bostondan wrote:
ResearchMed wrote: Is there something about the more experienced/referenced C that you didn't like?
On first glance, and of course without meeting her, it seems this is what she *wants* to do, and is good at it.
The problem is that unfortunately person C is fictional, while options A and B are real. It has been very difficult to find someone like option C. I put her in that list only to see what people felt was an appropriate rate for a qualified nanny without any major issues.
C exist. They want all the normal job stuff if legal (i.e. vacation, sick days, insurance,....). In my HCOL they all get passed around by word of mouth in the various Mom's groups since good help is hard to find. You can find a lot more of the 22-25 year old recent college grads who don't have job. They can do a good job. But for most of them you are a stepping stone.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Sat Oct 01, 2016 9:34 pm

randomguy wrote:In my HCOL they all get passed around by word of mouth in the various Mom's groups since good help is hard to find. You can find a lot more of the 22-25 year old recent college grads who don't have job. They can do a good job. But for most of them you are a stepping stone.
My wife has had a few people come interview with us that were highly recommended through a mom's group. I am not at all exaggerating when I say that in one single sentence one of the nannies said, "I am against vaccines and unwilling to get them, have no health insurance and don't plan to get it, will only accept under-the-table payment because I just got out of credit card debt, which is also why I don't have health insurance, and also I am allergic to all pets, meat, and dairy, so I cannot work with those things."

I was sure she was attempting to purposefully sabotage the interview. The rest of the interview was similar. She was hired by another family the next day. I consider myself and my wife fairly normal people, so it confuses me that someone else would want to hire someone like that so quickly. Maybe we're actually the crazy ones!
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Mudpuppy » Sat Oct 01, 2016 9:42 pm

bostondan wrote:
ResearchMed wrote:Have you contacted any agencies in Boston?
Not directly, but several friends reported mediocre experiences and said they were not necessarily worth the cost. Perhaps others have had better experiences.

My work gives me a free care.com subscription so we posted the job listing there. I got a huge number of applications. Given the quantity of applications, I assumed that we would be able to find a qualified candidate. It has been difficult. I am sure there are many excellent nannies out there, but I seem to not be great at finding them so far.

I would be happy to receive recommendations to specific agencies in Boston or references to nannies, though probably that would be best suited as a PM rather than posting in this thread.
Perhaps there was something about the wording of your listing that was not appealing to more experienced nannies. Have you asked your friends with nannies about how they worded their listing? Or look at the other listings and see how they are worded.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Sat Oct 01, 2016 9:46 pm

Mudpuppy wrote:Perhaps there was something about the wording of your listing that was not appealing to more experienced nannies. Have you asked your friends with nannies about how they worded their listing? Or look at the other listings and see how they are worded.
I'm wondering if it is because the job is sort of part-time for the first 6 months (30-40 hrs/wk) and then more than full-time (50 hrs/wk) after that. If only they knew that we are very nice people and that we would treat them well!
“There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” - Elie Wiesel

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by letsgobobby » Sat Oct 01, 2016 9:47 pm

9 years ago, in a relatively LCOL area, we paid a 16 year old nanny with lots of child-care experience $12 and later $15 per hour. We had her for 3 years and was really great. She was exceptionally responsible, very gentle, and took very good care of our child (and later, children).

I'd think almost a decade later, in Boston, with experience, you'd have to pay at least $25?

Definitely do everything above board. Definitely treat her well with some time off, generous gifts at the holidays, and a generous wedding gift if/when the time comes. We still have a relationship with her years later even now that she has her own family.

My sister has been through several nannies. It's hard to find a great one who will stick around, and when you find her it's worth paying her well enough to keep her.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Grt2bOutdoors » Sat Oct 01, 2016 9:50 pm

bostondan wrote:I'm sorry if this thread ends up repeating topics previously discussed. I attempted to search, but did not find anything quite matching my questions. I also searched Google, but the sites I found did not seem particularly reliable.

We are planning to hire a nanny in Boston (we are located near Fenway Park if that matters) starting in January 2017. Our daughter will be 5 months old at that time. We will need someone 30-40 hours/week from January to July, then 40-50 hours/week indefinitely after that.

1. What is a fare rate in your opinion (doing it the legit way, not under-the-table) for the following situations. Obviously this is somewhat subjective:
What does your colleagues or friends indicate they going rate is, ballpark because I don't think you will find a completely honest response that details ones cash outflows - personal finance can be a touchy subject. Don't live in Boston, but is this site reliable? http://www.bostonnanny.com/family-infor ... tion-fees/

3. Surprisingly, I have found that many of the people we interviewed are opposed to vaccinations and are even proud of this. This seems inappropriate when dealing with newborns. I know there are opinions about this that differ from mine, and respect that, but I will not have an unvaccinated nanny. Am I legally allowed to require vaccination?
Umm, sorry, but if it were my child I would not want them exposed to a petrie dish of known organisms that bring disaster with them. Also, hand-washing and sanitary practices is a must-have for any prospective employee.
4. What kind of benefits would the BH community recommend offering to a nanny? How much vacation time? Sick time? Holidays?
How much vacation time do you have? While not suggesting you offer 4 weeks, a minimum of 2 weeks might be a good compromise, you do want an employee who is well-rested and is able to enjoy the major holidays - not suggesting you offer company holidays but if you refer to nationally recognized days of observance you can see there are about 10-11 days a year that are federally recognized, use the calendar as your guide.
I just want to find a nanny that takes work seriously and that is happy to be working with us. I am not trying to penny-pinch, but also do not want to get taken advantage of by paying more than would be considered appropriate. Thanks in advance for any opinions.
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Mudpuppy » Sat Oct 01, 2016 10:00 pm

bostondan wrote:
Mudpuppy wrote:Perhaps there was something about the wording of your listing that was not appealing to more experienced nannies. Have you asked your friends with nannies about how they worded their listing? Or look at the other listings and see how they are worded.
I'm wondering if it is because the job is sort of part-time for the first 6 months (30-40 hrs/wk) and then more than full-time (50 hrs/wk) after that. If only they knew that we are very nice people and that we would treat them well!
Possibly. But also make sure your salary range and benefits are in line with what others are offering in Boston. I know part of the reason you posted this thread was to get an idea of what would be normal there, but you could also look at the other listings or ask services what their rates are to get a better picture.
bostondan wrote:My wife has had a few people come interview with us that were highly recommended through a mom's group. I am not at all exaggerating when I say that in one single sentence one of the nannies said, "I am against vaccines and unwilling to get them, have no health insurance and don't plan to get it, will only accept under-the-table payment because I just got out of credit card debt, which is also why I don't have health insurance, and also I am allergic to all pets, meat, and dairy, so I cannot work with those things."
Unfortunately, being against vaccinations is a popular mindset these days and seems to be more prevalent in HCOL areas. Several school districts in California are battling with the issue of low vaccination rates (and subsequent disease outbreaks), but state law has recently changed and a personal objection is no longer a valid exception from public school vaccination requirements. I can't say much more than that without deviating into disallowed topics for the forum, but rest assured that you're not alone in being wary about a nanny who does not support vaccinations, much less one who wants to work under-the-table.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Leemiller » Sat Oct 01, 2016 10:36 pm

We found our nanny on care.com and called references and did a background check. We not only paid federal, but also state unemployment taxes and workman's comp insurance. Care.com should give you a sense of market rates in your area. We required certain vaccinations and a flu shot.

Regarding the 40-50 hours, I think you need to hit 40 hours immediately. Why would someone work part-time for you for months when they were good and could get full-time work? You'll need to consider overtime pay and how that would work as well. 50 is high, I know lots of attorneys that come home and work after the kids are asleep to catch up. I've done it myself.

I would avoid hiring someone with their own child. I'd be concerned about how mine was treated and in my experience kids don't really "play" with each other until they are much older.

Are you offering enough money? I have a co-worker that constantly gets strange nannies or potential ones and she is definitely not paying market rates. We view it as a 2-2 1/2 year time limited expense. Although, this time around we are hoping to do a nanny share with a neighbor.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Leemiller » Sat Oct 01, 2016 10:38 pm

Also, you are very early for January. I'd be surprised if you could get someone to commit that far out unless they had a job that was ending. Good nannies seem to be available maybe a month or so out from the hire date.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by randomguy » Sat Oct 01, 2016 10:43 pm

bostondan wrote:
randomguy wrote:In my HCOL they all get passed around by word of mouth in the various Mom's groups since good help is hard to find. You can find a lot more of the 22-25 year old recent college grads who don't have job. They can do a good job. But for most of them you are a stepping stone.
My wife has had a few people come interview with us that were highly recommended through a mom's group. I am not at all exaggerating when I say that in one single sentence one of the nannies said, "I am against vaccines and unwilling to get them, have no health insurance and don't plan to get it, will only accept under-the-table payment because I just got out of credit card debt, which is also why I don't have health insurance, and also I am allergic to all pets, meat, and dairy, so I cannot work with those things."

I was sure she was attempting to purposefully sabotage the interview. The rest of the interview was similar. She was hired by another family the next day. I consider myself and my wife fairly normal people, so it confuses me that someone else would want to hire someone like that so quickly. Maybe we're actually the crazy ones!
Job interviews are to see if there is a fit. She told you who she was and you decided she wasn't for you. Sounds like a good interview. Granted it sounds like something that should be handled with a 5 min phone call before both of you waste your time. We always asked about vaccination, CPR, and a couple of others before wasting time brining someone in. I have heard similar levels of crazy talk in interviewing people for professional jobs as have with child care. You just have to accept that a good chunk of the population is crazy:)

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by gtaylor » Mon Oct 03, 2016 3:50 pm

So we did a variety of nanny hiring back when my twin girls were infants. Now, we have an au pair. We're in the Boston area.

I wouldn't do the US based nanny thing again. I think we had a total of four or five individuals, a mix of part and full time. They cost 2-5 times as much, the hours are somewhat inflexible, and Dear Dog getting the paperwork right for a US domestic employee is a ridiculous hassle (easily outsourced, but I guess I'm stubborn). The nannies themselves were all OK, but...

The au pair program I like much better. The person costs much less, is live-in, is younger and more willing to work our way, gives rather more flexible hours, and has much less paperwork. Plus bonus exposure for the kids to a foreigner. Ours is on duty for the early morning school runs, and then in the afternoon through bedtime, plus extra bits of time when we're both working late or school gets out early or something. I shudder to think of trying to find a local nanny to do a split schedule like this. But the au pair happily takes the mid day to go work out, see the sights, meet friends, whatever.

Several of the dual-professional households I know use au pairs and have done it again after the first year. It's just a good deal.

There are a bunch of captive agencies which are the only way to get an au pair. We've had good experiences with cultural care au pair and would recommend them.

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bostondan
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Mon Oct 03, 2016 5:46 pm

Thanks for all the feedback. The au pair idea certainly sounds like something interesting. I'm just nervous that it would be a bad fit and it would be difficult to get out of it.

We might just wait until close to January to look for nannies again. My mother is very ill and likely to pass in the next few days to weeks, so it's too distracting to make a decision right now anyways.
“There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” - Elie Wiesel

Leemiller
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Leemiller » Mon Oct 03, 2016 8:25 pm

I've heard mixed reviews on au pairs. Personally, I'd consider one but not for an infant or very young toddler.

Masacci
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Masacci » Mon Oct 03, 2016 9:43 pm

FWIW, it sounds like you have not found the right match yet.

A couple of things to consider: Ask for a year's commitment, after which you can review the performance and communicate changing needs for both parties. It's been my experience that being a nanny can be a temporary career move. This girl may want to go back to grad school.

Vacation time: 2 weeks. You pick one, they pick one. Any other vacation time you take...pay her. If she wants to take extra vacation time, she takes it without pay. Pay her the holidays. Pay her overtime. Don't short change them. If you are saying it's a 40 hour/week job...and one week they work 38 hours, pay them for the 40. However, overtime is not guaranteed.

Sick days: Also known as "no one wins" days. Nannies don't have a back up. I believe there are on the spot nannies that can be found through agencies just for this scenario. Fully vetted too.
Vaccines: mandatory

I'd recommend a nanny/child interview. See how this person interacts with your child over the course of a few hours. Anyone who really wants this job would gladly do this step.

And yes, good nannies are hard to find. I am one.

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bostondan
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Mon Oct 03, 2016 10:31 pm

Masacci wrote:And yes, good nannies are hard to find. I am one.
Interested in moving to Boston? :D
“There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” - Elie Wiesel

joebh
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by joebh » Tue Oct 04, 2016 7:18 am

bostondan wrote:3. Surprisingly, I have found that many of the people we interviewed are opposed to vaccinations and are even proud of this. This seems inappropriate when dealing with newborns. I know there are opinions about this that differ from mine, and respect that, but I will not have an unvaccinated nanny. Am I legally allowed to require vaccination?
You are legally allowed to avoid hiring any nanny who isn't vaccinated or who is a proud anti-vaxer. And I strongly recommend that you do so.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by joebh » Tue Oct 04, 2016 11:25 am

bostondan wrote:The problem is that unfortunately person C is fictional, while options A and B are real. It has been very difficult to find someone like option C. I put her in that list only to see what people felt was an appropriate rate for a qualified nanny without any major issues.
A good rule of thumb is to hire real people. Fictional people tend to make poor employees, although their pay rate is rather appealing.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by furnace » Tue Oct 04, 2016 11:46 am

Are you overthinking childcare? They have daycare centers all over Boston. Why not just drop your child in one you like? Lots of parents do it, and their kids turn out fine. Leaving your baby at home alone with a nanny, sounds like a riskier arrangement, in my opinion.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Flashes1 » Wed Oct 05, 2016 9:41 am

We deliberately "overpaid" our nanny/babysitters to retain them and also help find the best ones. We found there's no set type of person who tends to be the best....it's all case-by-case. I found that the one's who were friendly, punctual, and shared a lot of our belief and religious views tended to be the best for us. And I would avoid "anti-vaccination" people like the plague.

And I wouldn't necessarily preclude anyone bringing their own kids along. Again, it's all case-by-case - it could be bad or it could be good, just depends on the person. We had two who brought their kids. In both situations, it was great....our kids were the same age, and got along fine. But it could be bad in certain situations....no doubt about it. I would want them to be around the same age, and I would want to see how my kid plays with theirs first.

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dm200
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by dm200 » Wed Oct 05, 2016 10:16 am

No experience with Nannies, but as a parent, I would not see an inherent problem with a nanny bringing her own child to the job. [I would object, though, to an anti-vaccination position/attitude]

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Luke Duke » Wed Oct 05, 2016 11:01 am

furnace wrote:Are you overthinking childcare? They have daycare centers all over Boston. Why not just drop your child in one you like? Lots of parents do it, and their kids turn out fine. Leaving your baby at home alone with a nanny, sounds like a riskier arrangement, in my opinion.
My thoughts as well. Our daycare (not in Boston) has been great for our kids.

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bostondan
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Wed Oct 05, 2016 5:56 pm

Luke Duke wrote:
furnace wrote:Are you overthinking childcare? They have daycare centers all over Boston. Why not just drop your child in one you like? Lots of parents do it, and their kids turn out fine. Leaving your baby at home alone with a nanny, sounds like a riskier arrangement, in my opinion.
My thoughts as well. Our daycare (not in Boston) has been great for our kids.
I don't have any problem with a daycare. I'm sure it would work just fine. As a physician I have a pretty terrible schedule, so just would prefer having a nanny who could fit a bit more to our schedule. My wife has a better schedule than me, and could theoretically be in charge of dropping off our daughter 100% of the time, but I don't want to make her do that.

I wish there was a daycare right across the street from us. I would happily pay a premium for that convenience. When I already have 80 hour work weeks, every extra wasted minute is painful. I would much rather come right home and spend that time with my wife and daughter, rather than be extra tired worrying about transportation to daycare.
“There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” - Elie Wiesel

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by barelybarefoot » Wed Oct 05, 2016 6:18 pm

We are both working parents and one is physician. We have 3 kids so did it all - daycare, nanny, and now Au pair. With our schedule and calls, wish I'd been brave enough to do Au pair from the beginning. For small infant, I'd recommend going with an Au pair who already has has 1 yr experience in the US and who's already had infant care experience. Ours have come already knowing how to drive in US, already beyond home sick stage etc.
If you do want a nanny, the ones that come word of mouth were best. We did care.com and regardless of what we posted, got all kinds of responses/people we were not interested in including the anti-vaccination folks. I'm in HCOL area as well, nannies here run minimum $15/h for one kid, $10/h for nanny share and this is starting rate. At one point we were paying $1000/wk for nanny which is ridiculous but we needed the hours and flexibility.

I would join the local moms online group, we have several here. You pay to join, it's not anonymous so you get pretty reliable recommendations. I would not pay the nanny who brings her own child to work the same as a one-on-one nanny, to me it'd be paying for a nanny share.

Best of luck and it's true, if you find a good one, treat them well! And really consider Au pair in the future esp when kids older for split shift flexibility as other poster mentioned.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by charley » Wed Oct 05, 2016 7:32 pm

bostondan wrote:Thank you for all the valuable input.
Miakis wrote:I'm not sure I'd hire a nanny who is bringing her own baby. While it may be attractive from a social/play situation, I would be concerned that her attention would be more focused on her own baby, whom she is parenting full-time, while your child is the kid she "babysits."
My wife just brought up this point. I think it is a good one. We will not be hiring choice B.
For several reasons, this particular choice B doesn't appear to be a good fit (vaccines and taxes in particular).

That said, I wouldn't categorically exclude moms who will bring their own children.A mom in my wife's moms group does this, and it works out well. I think this hinges on her professionalism and how she meshes with the family she works for.

She has childcare experience and treats the kids equally. I think it might be misleading to suggest that a nanny with child would be preoccupied by their own child. I suspect daycare workers and nannies who have kids but don't bring them to work also have someone else on their mind and could be influenced by acting in the best interest of someone who isn't your child. Regarding sickness, if your nanny's child is very sick she may stay home to care for her child and to help prevent your child from getting sick. (The nanny above has her mom watch the kids and she takes care of her client's kids.) But I'm not sure how this differs from a nanny without kids calling in sick, and I suspect your child will still be healthier than if they attend daycare.

There are benefits to a nanny who also cares for her own children. The nanny understands just how frustrating kids can be when you deal with them for 40+ hours per week. Your child will have a playmate. Young children aren't very social, but they do learn that there are other people who are just as important as they are. From a numbers perspective, you also increase the pool of potential nannies by including moms who will bring their kids.

If I found the right person, who cared for my kids the way I would, I'd be willing to accommodate their requests - be it increased pay or ability to bring their child to work. In other words, I think finding the right fit is paramount.

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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by halfnine » Thu Oct 06, 2016 5:00 am

I'd probably rule out a nanny with a kid who was younger than mine or more than 2 years older than mine. Kids learn a tremendous amount from other kids and in a ideal world a good nanny with a kid a year than yours could be very beneficial for your child. I also wouldn't rule out a nanny share with another family for the same reason. As far as getting sick, once your kid is older than about 2-3 months I don't see it as being that big of a deal. Kids get sick. Exposure isn't necessarily bad.

Leemiller
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by Leemiller » Thu Oct 06, 2016 7:00 am

We had considered daycare but after touring a few decided against it for infant care. It is also a very expensive option for non-individualized care. My friends with babies in daycare have to take lots of time off work for sick days and their kids got sick a lot more than mine (and no, she didn't get sick a lot later when she started daycare at close to 3, unlike what some people claim will happen).

A nanny will do laundry and tidy the kid's room, is more flexible with hours, and gives one on one care. My child didn't play with other children until maybe around 2, before that I don't see any social benefit. We are now considering a nanny share but only to save a considerable amount of money. We are looking into an au pair but in two or so years.

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dm200
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by dm200 » Thu Oct 06, 2016 9:26 am

Today, if this were my child, I would insist that any such nanny get the annual flu shot.

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bostondan
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Re: Nanny in Boston

Post by bostondan » Thu Oct 06, 2016 9:54 am

I have concluded from this discussion that different things work for different people (obviously). That being said, it appears we all agree that vaccines are mandatory.

I will be doing the following:

1. Not offering the position to any of the current applicants. None are a perfect match.
2. Speak with some of the au pairs from the agency recommended above (Cultural Care - FYI, they give you a coupon to get registration for free, rather than $75, if you just ask).
3. If none match, we will consider interviewing nannies again in November/December, which is closer to the date we need them and may allow for additional candidates that are not currently free.
4. I will take a look at daycare again, but am less likely to use it for the reasons I have previously stated.
5. I will pay whoever works for me well and make sure they enjoy the job to the best of my ability.

Thank you for the helpful discussion.
“There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest.” - Elie Wiesel

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