Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Questions on how we spend our money and our time - consumer goods and services, home and vehicle, leisure and recreational activities
User avatar
pondering
Posts: 1010
Joined: Fri Jan 30, 2015 11:04 pm
Location: 412-977-3526, originally 718-273-2422

Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by pondering » Thu Dec 17, 2015 11:24 pm

My wife spends a lot of time and love giving me presents.

I'm always delighted with what she gets me.

I'm not a good gift giver. My best talent is to fold up money in engaging ways. Returning from Europe I made a $200 box with my left over currency.

I'm thinking of folding her my standard vase of 6 origami irises using $50 bills for the stems.

Would that be a better gift than a Roomba or another Pandora bracelet?
--Robert Sterbal | 412-977-3526 call/text

mouses
Posts: 3811
Joined: Sat Oct 24, 2015 12:24 am

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by mouses » Thu Dec 17, 2015 11:34 pm

Why not ask her what she wants?

User avatar
pondering
Posts: 1010
Joined: Fri Jan 30, 2015 11:04 pm
Location: 412-977-3526, originally 718-273-2422

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by pondering » Thu Dec 17, 2015 11:37 pm

She expressed interest in being surprised, a roomba and a pandora bracelet.
--Robert Sterbal | 412-977-3526 call/text

User avatar
Epsilon Delta
Posts: 7430
Joined: Thu Apr 28, 2011 7:00 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Epsilon Delta » Thu Dec 17, 2015 11:42 pm

If you're giving money that sounds like a cool way to do it. Whether you should give money is a different question. I do know some people enjoy shopping, and would be happy with such a gift. I do not know if your wife is among them.

User avatar
pondering
Posts: 1010
Joined: Fri Jan 30, 2015 11:04 pm
Location: 412-977-3526, originally 718-273-2422

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by pondering » Fri Dec 18, 2015 12:00 am

She liked her 40 gift cards totalling $400 dollars for her 40th birthday a few years ago.
--Robert Sterbal | 412-977-3526 call/text

Joe_R95
Posts: 27
Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2015 10:45 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Joe_R95 » Fri Dec 18, 2015 12:08 am

I keep a list of things in my phone that my girlfriend thought was cool, got excited about, or just had to show me because whatever it was was awesome. She probably tells you things she likes or is interested in on a regular basis. I use the list when gift times come up. They are always a hit because theres a lot of sentiment involved when you get her something she liked three months ago and hasn't thought about since. Failing that Roombas are awesome, love my 870. Pandoras are generic, go for something with her birthstone or a specific gem she really likes.

finite_difference
Posts: 1043
Joined: Thu Jul 09, 2015 7:00 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by finite_difference » Fri Dec 18, 2015 12:28 am

Have you tried origami? You could create an origami box with a piece of jewelry inside.
The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention. - Thich Nhat Hanh

User avatar
chickadee
Posts: 190
Joined: Thu Jul 10, 2014 2:13 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by chickadee » Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:05 am

Get a Roomba from Hammacher Schlemmer. Yes, you'll pay tthe full retail price, but the lifetime guarantee is priceless. Robot vacuum cleaners are amazing. Robot maintenance is not. When it starts acting up in 2 years, send it back to them for a full refund towards your next generation Roomba. I think I'm on my 4th in the last 10 years. Money, even folded into a crane, is lame, no offense.

miles monroe
Posts: 1201
Joined: Mon Jan 20, 2014 12:14 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by miles monroe » Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:14 am

years ago in my 20s i gave my wife a gift certificate at a local store. i learned never to do that again. they want us to suffer and go shopping. at least now we've got the internet.

and yes, now that i'm older and wiser, i agree that giving cash is lame.

User avatar
HomerJ
Posts: 11831
Joined: Fri Jun 06, 2008 12:50 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by HomerJ » Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:31 am

Giving your wife money is very weird. That's giving her something she already owns. "Here's a purse I found in your closet... Happy Birthday!". "Here's some money I found in the joint checking account... Happy Birthday!"

Ask her what she wants, and buy it with her online (or <horror> go to the store with her -- I try to avoid that if possible)

Origami roses is pretty cool though. Just do that with paper along with the gift.

User avatar
Epsilon Delta
Posts: 7430
Joined: Thu Apr 28, 2011 7:00 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Epsilon Delta » Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:43 am

HomerJ wrote:Giving your wife money is very weird. That's giving her something she already owns. "Here's a purse I found in your closet... Happy Birthday!". "Here's some money I found in the joint checking account... Happy Birthday!"
How exactly is it different for non-monetary gifts? "I found some money in the joint checking account and decided I know what to do with it better than you do. Happy Birthday!"

User avatar
HomerJ
Posts: 11831
Joined: Fri Jun 06, 2008 12:50 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by HomerJ » Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:47 am

Epsilon Delta wrote:
HomerJ wrote:Giving your wife money is very weird. That's giving her something she already owns. "Here's a purse I found in your closet... Happy Birthday!". "Here's some money I found in the joint checking account... Happy Birthday!"
How exactly is it different for non-monetary gifts? "I found some money in the joint checking account and decided I know what to do with it better than you do. Happy Birthday!"
Because you're setting the amount...

I've only bought maybe 3 actual surprise birthday gifts for my wife... It's hard to shop for a wife, I think... So she usually tells me what she wants, or even buys it herself, and I get to say "Happy Birthday! What did I get you?"

Handing her $200 would seem very strange to me. It's her money too.

letsgobobby
Posts: 11647
Joined: Fri Sep 18, 2009 1:10 am

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by letsgobobby » Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:58 am

I'm pretty desperate for gift ideas for my wife, but even I know better than to give money.

She just bought herself a roomba, so that's out.

I have a book for her, and a cordless heated cushion to take while we watch our kids play soccer games.

Then I'm buying her three classes to try out Barre.

i'm all out after that. I could use some help.

2comma
Posts: 1241
Joined: Thu Jul 15, 2010 11:37 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by 2comma » Fri Dec 18, 2015 3:05 am

We pretty much buy what we want when we want it so what do you get someone that already has everything? I've created my own "shtick" - I go to the local drug store and buy her all of the personal products she uses daily, a card, and something silly like a "chia pet" or a flashlight for her key ring (this year at least one of the gifts is going to be new windshield wipers - yeah, I'm a hopeless romantic). Of course I still have to find a big gift but she's gotten pretty good at making sure I know what that is going to be. My ex let me know in no certain terms that a toaster, which we needed, was not an acceptable Christmas gift so I gave her a house when I left - best deal I ever made...

I think you should make the folded money a part of your "shtick" - if I could do it, I tried, I'd steal your idea! Compared to my 90 year old father who has 6 kids competing for best gift my wife's gifts are relatively easy as is our relationship.
If I am stupid I will pay.

katbert
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Aug 08, 2010 10:26 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by katbert » Fri Dec 18, 2015 4:37 am

I think the presents that people like are the ones that reflect that you thought about the giftee and what they like, and I think it's hard to make money look like you thought about it much. If you don't want to buy more stuff maybe consider some kind of class or workshop that you can do together? (Maybe something artsy like ceramics or glassblowing, skating, wall climbing, horseback riding, wood shop, improv) or tickets to a show? or take the time to do something different/surprising for you like bake her a pie or cookies if that's something you don't typically do. i also like food gifts scaled up- if they like cheese get them ten different kinds of fancy cheese, or chocolate covered raisins do five lb or something ridiculous.
I second taking notes about what people like/ dislike, it makes gift giving and April fool's day easier.

mouses
Posts: 3811
Joined: Sat Oct 24, 2015 12:24 am

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by mouses » Fri Dec 18, 2015 5:56 am

I would not get a roomba. I had two, and they were maintenance nightmares, at least back then. They take more time to maintain than it would take to just vacuum. There used to be a useful and fun yahoo group on how to maintain them and hack them, but one day it disappeared. The company had asked yahoo to delete it, so there isn't even that support any more.

IPer
Posts: 1639
Joined: Sun Jul 28, 2013 8:51 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by IPer » Fri Dec 18, 2015 6:42 am

Sounds like I am divided as you might want to be:

1. Your unique way of delivering the goods (folded money) is cute and should always
be appreciated, however, some may think there is something lacking there, which there
might be so, I would continue to do that but perhaps half as much or stagger it with:

2. You might want to surprise her from time to time, every other time or every other
two times, whatever, just find something that she might enjoy other than folded money.
That "what" part of it of course is the hard part, will/should change over time. So that is
your challenge.

I believe if you put the effort in on #2 it will enhance the appreciation of #1 (or she might
beg you to go back to that way 100%!). Best of luck, happy holidays!
Read the Wiki Wiki !

retiredjg
Posts: 34161
Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:56 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by retiredjg » Fri Dec 18, 2015 6:44 am

pondering wrote:She expressed interest in being surprised, a roomba and a pandora bracelet.
The folded money thing sounds fun up to a point. But only use it occasionally.

You've already got the answer - surprise her with one of these. What could be easier?

HoopDiddyDiddy
Posts: 117
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2015 7:37 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by HoopDiddyDiddy » Fri Dec 18, 2015 7:08 am

I think money is fine if it fits your own marital dynamic and only you know whether it does or not.
Outside-looking-in viewers never see the full picture as it's impossible to know how other peoples marriages work.
I tell my husband what super cool thing he got this fall that is to be considered his Christmas gift and I also tell him what I got myself. We have no formal "Christmas Day" gift openings at all and this has worked fine for us for 24 years- personally I think it is absurd to do something because there is a "25" in a square on a calendar page labeled December. We buy each other gifts when the mood strikes.
Other people I know would divorce if there were no "formal" gifts on Christmas Day.
Every marriage is it's own unique entity with it's own unique dynamic- if yours includes cleverly folded money I think that is adorable.

marstaton4
Posts: 134
Joined: Wed Sep 15, 2010 11:52 am

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by marstaton4 » Fri Dec 18, 2015 7:53 am

I would go for something that you know she likes, but step it up a little bit. Gift card to a massage place, stylist, great coffee or chocolate, nice pictures from fun trips, weekend getaway that you may enjoy too. Try to have a little fun with it.

User avatar
Bustoff
Posts: 1979
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2012 6:45 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Bustoff » Fri Dec 18, 2015 8:07 am

Also makes a lovely centerpiece.
Image

User avatar
nisiprius
Advisory Board
Posts: 36852
Joined: Thu Jul 26, 2007 9:33 am
Location: The terrestrial, globular, planetary hunk of matter, flattened at the poles, is my abode.--O. Henry

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by nisiprius » Fri Dec 18, 2015 8:18 am

For us, an old married couple who've been wage-earners for a long time, and who tend to consult with each other on major purchases, the whole gift-giving thing is baffling and we've pretty much given it up. The idea that you can delight somebody else by knowing something that they want that they, themselves, don't know they want--when you both read the same mail-order catalogs--is almost impossibly unrealistic. It's one thing if it's a three-year-old who doesn't often get inside a toy store... or a nine-year-old who knows all about Star Wars but perhaps has never thought about a Make! Getting Started with Soldering kit.

My wife? If she wants something and thinks we can easily afford it, she'll get it. If she wants something and thinks we can't easily afford it and I get it for her, it isn't going to be an unalloyed thrill.

During the year we "gift" each other all the time simply by expressing enthusiasm for tentatively expressed purchase ideas.

Everyone has to work it out for themselves, though. This is very obviously a personal area. I would say myself that by and large people give gifts because it gives pleasure to the donor. If your wife likes getting you gifts, great. If you don't like getting her gifts, great. If that's unbalanced, it's no big deal, there are other aspects of the relationship that are unbalanced, too, and all you can do is hope it works out, overall. Either your spouse feels that you are attentive, loving, and respectful, or not. If your spouse does not feel that you're attentive, loving, and respectful, you can't fix that by consciously matching your gift-giving behavior to some artificial standard.

P.S. 1) I've never had anyone seem disappointed by a gift of money--however presented. 2) It's fairly obvious what the appeal of gift cards is--they strike a sort of happy medium, typically by forcing the recipient to buy something frivolous they would not have purchased otherwise. There are a million things wrong with gift cards, but I don't think they are entirely out of the question. We give them, sometimes. Just don't try to fold one into origami.
Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen nineteen and six, result happiness; Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds ought and six, result misery.

IPer
Posts: 1639
Joined: Sun Jul 28, 2013 8:51 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by IPer » Fri Dec 18, 2015 8:46 am

nisiprius wrote:For us, an old married couple who've been wage-earners for a long time, and who tend to consult with each other on major purchases, the whole gift-giving thing is baffling and we've pretty much given it up. The idea that you can delight somebody else by knowing something that they want that they, themselves, don't know they want--when you both read the same mail-order catalogs--is almost impossibly unrealistic. It's one thing if it's a three-year-old who doesn't often get inside a toy store... or a nine-year-old who knows all about Star Wars but perhaps has never thought about a Make! Getting Started with Soldering kit.

My wife? If she wants something and thinks we can easily afford it, she'll get it. If she wants something and thinks we can't easily afford it and I get it for her, it isn't going to be an unalloyed thrill.

During the year we "gift" each other all the time simply by expressing enthusiasm for tentatively expressed purchase ideas.

Everyone has to work it out for themselves, though. This is very obviously a personal area. I would say myself that by and large people give gifts because it gives pleasure to the donor. If your wife likes getting you gifts, great. If you don't like getting her gifts, great. If that's unbalanced, it's no big deal, there are other aspects of the relationship that are unbalanced, too, and all you can do is hope it works out, overall. Either your spouse feels that you are attentive, loving, and respectful, or not. If your spouse does not feel that you're attentive, loving, and respectful, you can't fix that by consciously matching your gift-giving behavior to some artificial standard.

P.S. 1) I've never had anyone seem disappointed by a gift of money--however presented. 2) It's fairly obvious what the appeal of gift cards is--they strike a sort of happy medium, typically by forcing the recipient to buy something frivolous they would not have purchased otherwise. There are a million things wrong with gift cards, but I don't think they are entirely out of the question. We give them, sometimes. Just don't try to fold one into origami.
+100! Wow! I see the Mastery of nisiprius extends well beyond his well constructed financial comments! Excellent man!
Read the Wiki Wiki !

User avatar
LiveSimple
Posts: 1077
Joined: Thu Jan 03, 2013 7:55 am

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by LiveSimple » Fri Dec 18, 2015 8:53 am

IPer wrote:
nisiprius wrote:For us, an old married couple who've been wage-earners for a long time, and who tend to consult with each other on major purchases, the whole gift-giving thing is baffling and we've pretty much given it up. The idea that you can delight somebody else by knowing something that they want that they, themselves, don't know they want--when you both read the same mail-order catalogs--is almost impossibly unrealistic. It's one thing if it's a three-year-old who doesn't often get inside a toy store... or a nine-year-old who knows all about Star Wars but perhaps has never thought about a Make! Getting Started with Soldering kit.

My wife? If she wants something and thinks we can easily afford it, she'll get it. If she wants something and thinks we can't easily afford it and I get it for her, it isn't going to be an unalloyed thrill.

During the year we "gift" each other all the time simply by expressing enthusiasm for tentatively expressed purchase ideas.

Everyone has to work it out for themselves, though. This is very obviously a personal area. I would say myself that by and large people give gifts because it gives pleasure to the donor. If your wife likes getting you gifts, great. If you don't like getting her gifts, great. If that's unbalanced, it's no big deal, there are other aspects of the relationship that are unbalanced, too, and all you can do is hope it works out, overall. Either your spouse feels that you are attentive, loving, and respectful, or not. If your spouse does not feel that you're attentive, loving, and respectful, you can't fix that by consciously matching your gift-giving behavior to some artificial standard.

P.S. 1) I've never had anyone seem disappointed by a gift of money--however presented. 2) It's fairly obvious what the appeal of gift cards is--they strike a sort of happy medium, typically by forcing the recipient to buy something frivolous they would not have purchased otherwise. There are a million things wrong with gift cards, but I don't think they are entirely out of the question. We give them, sometimes. Just don't try to fold one into origami.
+100! Wow! I see the Mastery of nisiprius extends well beyond his well constructed financial comments! Excellent man!
+ 1

EddyB
Posts: 557
Joined: Fri May 24, 2013 3:43 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by EddyB » Fri Dec 18, 2015 9:12 am

Epsilon Delta wrote:
HomerJ wrote:Giving your wife money is very weird. That's giving her something she already owns. "Here's a purse I found in your closet... Happy Birthday!". "Here's some money I found in the joint checking account... Happy Birthday!"
How exactly is it different for non-monetary gifts? "I found some money in the joint checking account and decided I know what to do with it better than you do. Happy Birthday!"
Especially as regards the "I want it but don't need it" family of gifts, the thought (of "it's the thought that counts" fame) is often "I value your joy/happiness/comfort/etc. more than you do."

flyingbison
Posts: 1363
Joined: Wed Mar 12, 2014 8:52 am

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by flyingbison » Fri Dec 18, 2015 9:14 am

nisiprius wrote: ... the whole gift-giving thing is baffling and we've pretty much given it up. ...
Same for me. We stopped exchanging holiday gifts when we bought our house together 6 years ago. I also haven't given gifts to parents, siblings, etc. for at least a decade now.

User avatar
dbCooperAir
Posts: 1107
Joined: Tue Jan 07, 2014 10:13 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by dbCooperAir » Fri Dec 18, 2015 9:57 am

After about 10th year of marriage we just gave up on trying to gift each other much of anything, its hard enough to figure out what to give to the teenagers at this point.

As far as folded money, my spouse knows where my wallet is, she can help herself whenever she chooses.
Neither a wise man nor a brave man lies down on the tracks of history to wait for the train of the future to run over him. | -Dwight D. Eisenhower-

nolapepper
Posts: 170
Joined: Wed Mar 25, 2015 3:06 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by nolapepper » Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:27 pm

a piece of jewelry, scarf, ladies never have enough of those. Just get a style or a color she does not have yet.

Texanbybirth
Posts: 974
Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2015 12:07 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Texanbybirth » Fri Dec 18, 2015 1:59 pm

My wife is a FANTASTIC gift giver. It's amazing to see how her mind works when considering, researching, purchasing, and wrapping presents. I have resigned myself to being outdone almost all of the time. However, I'm quite good at surprises and small gifts throughout the year. I like to surprise her with little presents of consumables throughout the year, and then I keep a list on my phone of things she mentions for big occasions: Christmas, b-day, anniversary. We typically set a budget of ~$30 for each other.

I agree that giving your wife money would be weird. I make the bulk of our income, but it's completely both of ours once it hits the checking account. Maybe you don't do your finances the same way? Try the Roomba - it will benefit you too!

User avatar
Meg77
Posts: 2409
Joined: Fri May 22, 2009 1:09 pm
Location: Dallas, TX
Contact:

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Meg77 » Fri Dec 18, 2015 2:14 pm

As a wife, I can say that I think the folded money idea is a cute one. It shows creativity, time and effort put into a gift at least, which is more than can be said for most gifts these days (which are ordered online with one click, wrapped by some unseen worker and delivered to the door). And since you've done something similar before I think this could make a neat tradition or accompaniment to "real" gifts.

I will also say though that it is WAY easier to surprise a woman with a gift than a man. Just make the money box and then put some earrings in there! Or hang a necklace off one of the flowers. Best gift idea ever.

Or buy any number of different bath & body products. Perfume, lotion, shoes, pajamas, scarves, gloves, jewelry, books, makeup, sweaters, anything for the kitchen, anything for the pets, anything for the yard...a massage or facial, a gift card to a nice restaurant with promises of a date night to come, a yoga membership, workout gear or clothes...I mean seriously what can't you get a woman?? Just look at any brand of anything in her bathroom or closet and go to that place and have the salesperson pick out any other item in your budget range (a gift bag of makeup items for instance).

Or do what my husband and I do and vow not to get each other presents. This year we are "getting each other" new flooring in the entryway and guest room. Two years ago we "got each other' a new washer and dryer for our new house. Honestly men are so much harder to gift for. I'm already worried about what random thing to buy him for his birthday in January...I've run out of gift ideas, and we've only been married 2 years! :annoyed
"An investment in knowledge pays the best interest." - Benjamin Franklin

SrGrumpy
Posts: 703
Joined: Wed Aug 05, 2015 3:21 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by SrGrumpy » Fri Dec 18, 2015 2:17 pm

There was a Seinfeld episode about this. It didn't end well for Jerry. Of course, you have more leeway with a wife than with a galpal. Putting some creativity into it rather than whipping out some wrinkled bills from your wallet is key (see above post ^). But only you truly know the answer.
Last edited by SrGrumpy on Fri Dec 18, 2015 3:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

new2bogle
Posts: 1358
Joined: Fri Sep 11, 2009 2:05 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by new2bogle » Fri Dec 18, 2015 2:17 pm

flyingbison wrote:
nisiprius wrote: ... the whole gift-giving thing is baffling and we've pretty much given it up. ...
Same for me. We stopped exchanging holiday gifts when we bought our house together 6 years ago. I also haven't given gifts to parents, siblings, etc. for at least a decade now.

Wholeheartedly agree! Presents are for children.

User avatar
Dutch
Posts: 1277
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2013 2:12 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Dutch » Fri Dec 18, 2015 2:21 pm

Don't get a roomba or any other kitchen- or cleaning equipment. Trust me on this :P

User avatar
Epsilon Delta
Posts: 7430
Joined: Thu Apr 28, 2011 7:00 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Epsilon Delta » Fri Dec 18, 2015 3:22 pm

nolapepper wrote:a piece of jewelry, scarf, ladies never have enough of those. Just get a style or a color she does not have yet.
You mean a color she thinks makes her look pallid, and a style she thinks makes her look fat?

mouses
Posts: 3811
Joined: Sat Oct 24, 2015 12:24 am

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by mouses » Fri Dec 18, 2015 3:23 pm

nolapepper wrote:a piece of jewelry, scarf, ladies never have enough of those. Just get a style or a color she does not have yet.
I would have zero use for a scarf. I'm not much for jewelry either. A gift certificate for a massage, on the other hand, that would be nice.

User avatar
Cosmo
Posts: 1198
Joined: Mon Mar 05, 2007 9:46 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Cosmo » Fri Dec 18, 2015 3:51 pm

Dutch wrote:Don't get a roomba or any other kitchen- or cleaning equipment. Trust me on this :P
I see your point but I strongly disagree about the Roomba specifically. In this case, you are buying her something that will significantly eliminate sweeping of floors (in theory). It's a lot different than purchasing a conventional vacuum IMO.

Cosmo

PhysicsTeacher
Posts: 120
Joined: Tue May 19, 2015 4:38 pm
Location: Arkansas, USA

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by PhysicsTeacher » Sat Dec 19, 2015 4:06 pm

I wouldn't appreciate money as a gift from my husband; even though we have separate accounts, we budget together and ultimately all the money is for both of our benefit.

I asked for jewelry for my birthday, and, at my husband's request, sent him an email full of links to items I liked. I enjoy the sparkle of the cz and silver ring he picked out, but for Christmas I told him I'd really like an ibond. That'll put us $25 or $50 closer to retirement and being able to play together whenever we want. He's getting a $15 pocket knife and some hot cocoa mix.

I did ask for an L.L.Bean gift card from my in-laws. I agree that gift cards can be nice for compulsive savers because they offer permission to be frivolous. You have to be careful, though; I sent my mil an Amazon gift card for her birthday, and she informed me she spent it on furnace filters.

Dandy
Posts: 5403
Joined: Sun Apr 25, 2010 7:42 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Dandy » Sat Dec 19, 2015 4:17 pm

Try getting assistance from her mother, daughter, sister or best friend. Maybe one can suggest a gift, find out from her in a round about way or actually go shopping with you. If all else fails how about a weekend away to someplace special.

retiredjg
Posts: 34161
Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:56 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by retiredjg » Sat Dec 19, 2015 5:11 pm

OP's wife has already told him what she would like to have. The only question in my mind is why does he just not buy one or both of those things?

I'm a bit bewildered.

Or perhaps he wonders if the act of doing the folding is a better and sweeter surprise. Could be. Maybe buy the roomba and fold enough for a bracelet and let her choose it.

Colorado13
Posts: 762
Joined: Thu Apr 07, 2011 4:58 pm
Location: Colorado

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Colorado13 » Sat Dec 19, 2015 6:22 pm

PhysicsTeacher wrote:....and she informed me she spent it on furnace filters.
I asked for and received furnace filters as a gift a couple of years ago. I was happy to receive them...

tomd37
Posts: 2857
Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2007 10:39 pm
Location: Middle Tennessee

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by tomd37 » Sat Dec 19, 2015 8:31 pm

Just shy of 50 years of marriage, in our early 80s, and definitely not wanting new gifts we probably will not get much use out of, I was looking for a "different" gift for my wife that I know she would really enjoy.

:idea: We recently completed our first visit to Savannah, GA and for five days all she talked about was wanting to try Leopold's ice cream. Apparently it is well known in Savannah and on the last day we managed to get there. And boy was it good!

Leopold's just started shipping their product for the first time so I ordered some for her. It is not cheap but hopefully this will be a total surprise to her that she never expected. :happy Leopold's last shipping date is on Monday for delivery either on Tuesday or Wednesday.

Of course this is just a supplement to her main gifts.
Tom D.

User avatar
imbogled
Posts: 136
Joined: Wed Feb 28, 2007 4:31 pm
Location: Buckeye State

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by imbogled » Sun Dec 20, 2015 6:34 am

How about purchasing tickets for a play/musical or concert so you both would enjoy a lovely night out together.
Someone is sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago. | Warren Buffett

User avatar
Kosmo
Posts: 1285
Joined: Wed Sep 05, 2012 11:54 am
Location: Philadelphia

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Kosmo » Sun Dec 20, 2015 8:46 am

imbogled wrote:How about purchasing tickets for a play/musical or concert so you both would enjoy a lovely night out together.
I was just about to say something along these lines. Get her an experience, not an item.

My wife and I make Christmas gift giving into a little game/challenge. This year's challenge is 3 gifts: something to wear, something to eat/drink, and an adventure. The total cost for all three is $100. This emphasizes creativity and doesn't disguise extravagance as thougfulness.

retiredjg
Posts: 34161
Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:56 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by retiredjg » Sun Dec 20, 2015 9:22 am

Kosmo wrote:My wife and I make Christmas gift giving into a little game/challenge. This year's challenge is 3 gifts: something to wear, something to eat/drink, and an adventure. The total cost for all three is $100. This emphasizes creativity and doesn't disguise extravagance as thougfulness.
That sounds like fun! What a good plan.

User avatar
pondering
Posts: 1010
Joined: Fri Jan 30, 2015 11:04 pm
Location: 412-977-3526, originally 718-273-2422

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by pondering » Sun Dec 20, 2015 3:08 pm

I got the cheap robot vacuum from Aldi, it will be a present from our dog to Melissa. I picked up a casserole sized crock pot for her, and I have some clothing and slippers to wrap up from our daughter and me.

I took my wife counter shopping at Sam's. She said she really wanted a Pandora bracelet or nothing. It isn't the first time she has given me this type of ultimatum.

Does anyone know the best place to pick up a Pandora bracelet in person?
--Robert Sterbal | 412-977-3526 call/text

User avatar
wageoghe
Posts: 505
Joined: Wed May 25, 2011 8:28 am
Location: Northern Alabama

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by wageoghe » Sun Dec 20, 2015 3:16 pm

You might want to try the Pandora Store Locator:

http://www.pandora.net/en-us/stores

User avatar
pondering
Posts: 1010
Joined: Fri Jan 30, 2015 11:04 pm
Location: 412-977-3526, originally 718-273-2422

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by pondering » Sun Dec 20, 2015 3:29 pm

I guess I should have asked if there are any discounted stores.

I'm basically venting about the cost of jewelry. My apologies if that offends people here.
--Robert Sterbal | 412-977-3526 call/text

retiredjg
Posts: 34161
Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:56 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by retiredjg » Sun Dec 20, 2015 3:49 pm

Hope you get over it. :happy

Miakis
Posts: 371
Joined: Sat Aug 16, 2014 6:40 pm

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by Miakis » Sun Dec 20, 2015 3:58 pm

When I'm not sure what to get, I like to go to a place like the World Market and just buy a bunch of edibles for a gift bag/basket. They have a lot of interesting imported stuff that's fun to try.

User avatar
in_reality
Posts: 4529
Joined: Fri Jul 12, 2013 6:13 am

Re: Should I just give my wife (folded) money?

Post by in_reality » Sun Dec 20, 2015 9:46 pm

pondering wrote:I guess I should have asked if there are any discounted stores.

I'm basically venting about the cost of jewelry. My apologies if that offends people here.
Whatever you end up paying, I suggest making a folded up box with money to hold the jewelry when you give it to her. It'll be endearing. It's your talent after all.

Post Reply