Search found 2105 matches

by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 6:29 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

A grasshopper walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Hey, you're a grasshopper! We've got a drink named after you!" The grasshopper says, "Why would anybody name a drink 'Bob'?" * * * A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll be glad to serve you, but don't try to start anything...
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:51 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

(from the wonderful George Carlin:) Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack? Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? When someone offers you a penny for your thoughts, and you give him your two cents, what happens to the...
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:24 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

What do you call a doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class?

A doctor.
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:21 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

A young man from Texas walked into a bar and asked for a drink.

The bartender asked, "you got any I.D.?"

The young Texan said, "any idee about what?"
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:15 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

Two kangaroos were talking to each other. "I sure hope it doesn't rain today," said one. "I just hate it when the children have to play indoors."
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:11 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people seem really bright until you hear them talk.
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:10 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

Why does psychoanalysis work so much faster for men than for women?

Because when it's time to regress to childhood, they're already halfway there.
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:08 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

So the cannibals all went to the wedding to toast the bride and groom.
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:06 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

A woman was at the dentist's office to have a tooth removed. "Doctor, I'm just dreading this. I almost think I'd rather have a baby again than have a tooth pulled."

"Well," said the dentist, "make up your mind so I can adjust the chair."
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:04 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

"Jim, do you smoke after sex?"

"Gee, I don't know. I've never looked."
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:04 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

A man walks into a doctor's office. "Doctor, you have to help me. I keep imagining that I'm a giant moth." "I'm sorry," said the doctor, "but I'm just a general pracitioner. For a problem like that, you need to see a psychiatrist." "Yeah, I know," said the man. "In fact, I was actually on my way to ...
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:01 pm
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

"Mr. Jones," said the doctor, "I'm afraid I have some bad news, and some even worse news."

"What's the bad news?" asked Jones.

"Well, your tests came back, and they showed that you only have 24 hours to live."

"Oh, no! What could possibly be worse than that?"

"I tried to reach you yesterday."
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:58 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

A priest, a rabbi, a traveling salesman, a dumb blonde, a dying man, a psychiatrist, a dog, and a duck walked into a bar.

"What is this?" asked the bartender, "some kind of joke?"
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:55 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:54 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

A man walked into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm.

"I'll have a beer, and one for the road."
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:53 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

An invisible man married an invisible woman.

Their kids were nothing to look at, either.
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:49 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

When Aunt Alice married Uncle Jack and moved to live at his farm, she put a shoe box on a shelf in her closet and asked him never to open it. For 50 years Uncle Jack respected her wishes, left the box alone, and never even asked what was in it. But finally, as Aunt Alice lay sick and dying and Uncle...
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:41 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

A woman was leaving a store with her morning coffee when she noticed a very unusual funeral procession. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman, walking a pit bull on a leash, and behind the woman with the dog was a line of 200 ot...
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:35 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

A man flying a hot air balloon realized that he was lost. He reduced his altitude until he was within shouting distance of the ground and spotted a man walking below. "Excuse me," he called, "but can you help me? I promised to meet a friend an hour ago, but I don't know where I am." "You're approxim...
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:21 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad sky diver?

A bad golfer goes whack, "Damn!" A bad sky diver goes "Damn!" whack.
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:17 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

Several professional chess players were standing in the lobby of the tournament hotel, bragging about their strategies and victories in the latest round. After about an hour of this, the hotel manager came out and said they'd have to break it up and go to their rooms. "But why?" "Because I just can'...
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:11 am
Forum: Personal Consumer Issues
Topic: OT: Joke thread!
Replies: 183
Views: 57683

Two vultures boarded an airplane, each of them carrying two dead possums.

The flight attendant looked at them and said, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, but only one carrion allowed per passenger."
by beardsworth
Thu Feb 07, 2008 9:24 am
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: Periodic investing does not equal Dollar Cost Averaging
Replies: 79
Views: 24492

Maybe I'm obtuse, but I don't even "get" the distinction which seems to exist in some posters' minds between "periodic investing" and "dollar cost averaging." In effect, they seem pretty much the same thing. Perhaps "periodic investing" is the technique, and "dollar cost averaging" is the result. If...
by beardsworth
Mon Feb 04, 2008 1:54 pm
Forum: US Chapters
Topic: Dodge & Cox reopening
Replies: 1
Views: 2195

There's already another thread, started several days ago, about this.

http://www.diehards.org/forum/viewtopic ... 90&start=0
by beardsworth
Sun Feb 03, 2008 9:51 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: TIAA Real Estate Acount raises ER, again
Replies: 30
Views: 5439

Stratton wrote: "I'll venture a guess the REA is probably keeping a larger cash pile unless they see a good deal." Yes, as of 12-31-07, TIAA Real Estate Account was sitting on well over $3 billion in cash. (Total assets of $17.66 billion, of which 19% in "short term investments.") http://www.tiaa-cr...
by beardsworth
Sat Jan 26, 2008 10:12 pm
Forum: Personal Finance (Not Investing)
Topic: The fantastic potential of wind energy in U.S.
Replies: 35
Views: 7331

Why

I am all in favor of alternatives to fossil fuels, but why are you starting a brand new thread--on what is basically an investing and personal finance forum--on the exact same subject as you did four weeks ago?

http://www.diehards.org/forum/viewtopic ... 1200108016
by beardsworth
Fri Jan 11, 2008 4:18 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: What Angelo Mozilo did for his shareholders
Replies: 6
Views: 1832

http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid= ... refer=home

"Gold" hardly seems adequate to describe this particular "parachute."

Marc
by beardsworth
Thu Dec 27, 2007 11:51 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: The official IRS announcement re the "patch"
Replies: 3
Views: 1427

I had not realized that the surname of the IRS Commissioner is "Stiff." Hmmm . . .
by beardsworth
Thu Dec 27, 2007 10:58 pm
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: TIAA-CREF Confusion - helping parents with possible switch?
Replies: 29
Views: 5369

Beware

alsmez, You have said that you would "love" "any advice," so my advice, offered respectfully, is to beware of trespassing. Even though you say that your parents understand nothing about investing, they have already achieved a seven-fugure portfolio without your help. There is nothing in your origina...
by beardsworth
Tue Dec 25, 2007 6:04 pm
Forum: Personal Finance (Not Investing)
Topic: U.S. Senate Report on Global Warming
Replies: 165
Views: 33282

robertts12

I don't pretend to have detailed knowledge of physics, or the science of global warming and sea level changes. But what I've seen in my own readings on the subject is that melting of sea ice, while certainly not desirable for the human and animal populations which depend on large expanses of continu...
by beardsworth
Tue Dec 25, 2007 4:11 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: Wish list for 2008
Replies: 14
Views: 3308

Ken

Ken--

Unhedged. For folks who would like exposure to other currencies in the form of bonds as well as stocks.

Marc
by beardsworth
Tue Dec 25, 2007 4:04 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: Wish list for 2008
Replies: 14
Views: 3308

I second Murray re an investment-grade (or higher) international bond fund. And one or more international small-cap/mid-cap funds to supplement International Explorer. (It just seems crazy that a fund company the size of Vanguard, with dozens of funds dominated by essentially the same group of domes...
by beardsworth
Wed Dec 05, 2007 5:01 pm
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: Renouncing oil, gas, and mineral rights on personal property
Replies: 22
Views: 5379

A few things to think about

Hi John, Take this with however large a grain of salt you find appropriate, as I do not live in your part of the country and have absolutely no hands-on experience with the issues raised by your question. However . . . there was a period in my life where I did a lot of research about the history of ...
by beardsworth
Sun Dec 02, 2007 11:35 pm
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: Larry... Do you still like the TIAA Traditional Account?
Replies: 22
Views: 4294

Bob, I assume your comment about "favorable" conditions in 2000 refers to higher interest rates than at present? It becomes difficult to remember which years rates were on an upswing and which years they were declining. And it seems almost impossible to believe that there was once a time when a pers...
by beardsworth
Sun Dec 02, 2007 7:06 pm
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: Larry... Do you still like the TIAA Traditional Account?
Replies: 22
Views: 4294

Reply to Paul

Paul, As I said originally, we have no experience implementing any of them, because the decision time has not arrived. I have no real understanding of how a TPA works or how the recipient can use or redirect funds received through a TPA. Since there is a likelihood that we will want to annuitize a g...
by beardsworth
Sun Dec 02, 2007 6:30 pm
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: Larry... Do you still like the TIAA Traditional Account?
Replies: 22
Views: 4294

Withdrawal options for Traditional in a Retirement Annuity

As noted in posts above, the ability to receive proceeds from TIAA Traditional in a Retirement Annuity (RA) is more restrictive than receiving proceeds from TIAA Traditional in a Group Supplemental Retirement Annuity (GSRA) or IRA--and, largely because of that difference in account holder access and...
by beardsworth
Sun Nov 25, 2007 3:21 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: Gratitude to nisiprius, valuethinker, and bob u.
Replies: 0
Views: 778

Gratitude to nisiprius, valuethinker, and bob u.

As just one participant in this forum--and for years as a lurker but only recently as a poster--I would like to express my thanks to each of you for the many posts you make. When I see any of your respective user names, I know that I am about to read a post which is coherent, well-considered, well-w...
by beardsworth
Sun Nov 25, 2007 3:06 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: Paul Krugman: "Banks Gone Wild"
Replies: 44
Views: 10481

Meanwhile, back at the main topic

Oh, my. I started this thread with a simple article link on a holiday weekend, turned my back for a while, and now find that it has grown to almost three dozen posts. Unfortunately, a large number of them are on the extraneous question of whether Paul Krugman is an economic bonehead. ("Is not!" "Is ...
by beardsworth
Fri Nov 23, 2007 1:59 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: Paul Krugman: "Banks Gone Wild"
Replies: 44
Views: 10481

"Everyone is responsible"

"Everyone is responsible." Yes, exactly. We have greedy lenders who engaged in irresponsible practices, and then paid their executives a hundred times more to leave their companies than many people will ever earn in their entire lifetimes. We have bond ratings companies who somehow gave high investm...
by beardsworth
Fri Nov 23, 2007 1:38 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: Paul Krugman: "Banks Gone Wild"
Replies: 44
Views: 10481

Paul Krugman: "Banks Gone Wild"

Paul Krugman's latest column on the subprime mess and other distortions in the financial system. In contrast to others' commentaries--which tend to blame individuals with shaky personal finances who tried to buy more house than they could afford, and/or to buy on unfavorable terms--this one focuses ...
by beardsworth
Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:22 pm
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: Alternatives at the core of the portfolio
Replies: 12
Views: 3307

I posted the link . . .

Just to clarify, I posted the link to the TIAA-CREF paper only because it bore on the original poster's topic, and I thought it an interesting example of an "outside the box" approach--not because I agreed, or disagreed, with its conclusions or recommendations.

Marc
by beardsworth
Fri Nov 16, 2007 9:20 pm
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: Alternatives at the core of the portfolio
Replies: 12
Views: 3307

"Reverse Asset Allocation"

Here's a recent (June 2007) TIAA-CREF Asset Management paper on this very subject: "Reverse Asset Allocation: Alternatives At the Core."

Marc

http://www.tcasset.com/research/article ... cation.pdf
by beardsworth
Fri Nov 16, 2007 8:24 am
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: "worst housing market since the Great Depression"
Replies: 45
Views: 10160

Fortune magazine housing price predictions article

Here's an article from Fortune, recently reprinted on Yahoo's "Finance" page, which takes a Schiller-like approach comparing price/rent relationships in 54 U.S. metro areas, in a manner similar to computing price/earnings relationship for stocks--and arrives at the conclusion that over the next seve...
by beardsworth
Tue Nov 06, 2007 1:47 pm
Forum: Personal Finance (Not Investing)
Topic: Quiz: What American accent do you have?
Replies: 48
Views: 12366

I, too, learned that I sound as Philadelphia as Philadelphia cheesecake, or, if not exactly from Philadelphia, then I am from New Jersey or Baltimore. This was most interesting, because North Carolina is the only place I've ever lived that was further east than Ohio. Methinks that multiple-choice ac...
by beardsworth
Fri Nov 02, 2007 1:20 pm
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: Brokerage IRA: Vanguard? Schwab? Fidelity? Other?
Replies: 7
Views: 2696

Brokerage IRA: Vanguard? Schwab? Fidelity? Other?

It's common on the forum for people to recommend Vanguard as superior to other fund companies because of its wonderfully low costs. My wife and I are having the opposite problem--trying to figure out whether it's "justified" to use Vanguard anyway in a situation where they're the HIGH-cost provider....
by beardsworth
Thu Nov 01, 2007 9:34 am
Forum: Personal Investments
Topic: Rebalancing at Vanguard
Replies: 5
Views: 2311

Here's a slightly edited version of a post I made last week on another thread. The thread was about an article posted on Vanguard's own Web site about the importance of regular rebalancing, but I "arrived" late at the thread and made one of the last posts. The rebalancing advice in the Vanguard arti...
by beardsworth
Sat Oct 27, 2007 7:18 am
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: Rebalancing Article from Vanguard
Replies: 10
Views: 3222

The rebalancing advice in the Vanguard article link originally posted by Mel is, of course, good advice. It's unfortunate, therefore, that Vanguard itself doesn't help to make such rebalancing more convenient, especially within IRAs where selling shares for rebalancing purposes doesn't trigger any "...
by beardsworth
Sat Oct 13, 2007 9:26 am
Forum: Personal Finance (Not Investing)
Topic: "In an instant, retirement savings vanish"
Replies: 6
Views: 3098

Does anyone know what the situation is/what the protections are with regard to this kind of hacker theft in Vanguard's brokerage operation? I can't tell if my question is actually answered by this page from the Vanguard Brokerage Services site: https://personal.vanguard.com/VGApp/hnw/accounttypes/ac...
by beardsworth
Wed Sep 26, 2007 10:53 pm
Forum: Investing - Theory, News & General
Topic: TIAA-CREF not a member of state guaranty associations??!!
Replies: 46
Views: 11140

nisiprius, it's been a week since your original post, and (so far) there have been no responses, but I hope you'll see the post title again and notice mine. Though the guarantee of TIAA Traditional has, for as long as I can remember, carried the qualifying phrase "subject to TIAA's claims paying abi...
by beardsworth
Wed Sep 26, 2007 5:55 am
Forum: Personal Finance (Not Investing)
Topic: Alan Greenspan// Your thoughts
Replies: 27
Views: 6264

Here is an article, written two years ago as Greenspan was preparing to retire, by William Greider, long-time political and economics essayist for "Rolling Stone" and "The Nation," and author of "Secrets of the Temple," a 1989 book about the internal and external workings of the Federal Reserve. htt...