Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

Non-investing personal finance issues including insurance, credit, real estate, taxes, employment and legal issues such as trusts and wills.
Topic Author
ClubberLang
Posts: 86
Joined: Sun Apr 12, 2009 9:53 am

Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

Post by ClubberLang »

It's often documented that parents should plan on paying for their children's college costs, almost as if the student is entitled to it. Two questions:

1) Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

2) If the answer to #1 is yes, do grads have an obligation to repay their parents?
livesoft
Posts: 86079
Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2007 7:00 pm

Post by livesoft »

We need a poll! :)

1) No.
2) N/A
Triple digit golfer
Posts: 10433
Joined: Mon May 18, 2009 5:57 pm

Post by Triple digit golfer »

There is no right or wrong answer. It depends on everyone's circumstances.
User avatar
market timer
Posts: 6535
Joined: Tue Aug 21, 2007 1:42 am

Post by market timer »

I'm a fan of grade-contingent subsidies, like $10K/year if the student maintains a 3.5. It always astounds me how many families are willing to spend $200K over four years just for college.
User avatar
Opponent Process
Posts: 5157
Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:19 pm

Post by Opponent Process »

IMO this is impossible to answer objectively since we're all biased according to our own various privileges in life (or lack thereof).
30/30/20/20 | US/International/Bonds/TIPS | Average Age=37
User avatar
In The Weeds
Posts: 309
Joined: Fri Mar 20, 2009 1:04 pm
Location: Texas

Post by In The Weeds »

Better the kid's parents than me.

Hopefully the sacrifice of the parent will enable the kid to help take care of their parents in their old age if needed.
WISDOM comes with age... But sometimes it's an optional feature.
User avatar
Petrocelli
Posts: 2966
Joined: Mon Feb 19, 2007 5:29 pm
Location: Fenway Park, between 2nd and 3rd base

Post by Petrocelli »

I sent a kid to college this year. Based on that, my answers are

1. Yes
2. No
Petrocelli (not the real Rico, but just a fan)
User avatar
theac
Posts: 802
Joined: Fri Dec 12, 2008 5:00 am

Post by theac »

In general...NO. Especially if it's a boy. You might just be educating him in something more important than anything taught in schools, like how to become a man.
User avatar
Opponent Process
Posts: 5157
Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:19 pm

Post by Opponent Process »

market timer wrote:It always astounds me how many families are willing to spend $200K over four years just for college.
can be either of two things (or both, who's to say?):

1. just another way to scoreboard friends and family.
2. an incredibly selfless act and maybe the wisest use of your money.
30/30/20/20 | US/International/Bonds/TIPS | Average Age=37
User avatar
bearwolf
Posts: 1718
Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 12:34 am
Location: Oklahoma

Post by bearwolf »

Petrocelli wrote:I sent a kid to college this year. Based on that, my answers are

1. Yes
2. No
My son graduated this year. I paid for 4 years of college. He has graduated and is now gainfully employed in a job he really likes. As near as I can tell he is becoming a man in spite of the fact that I paid for college. Our primary guideline for paying for school was that he maintain a 3.0 grade point average. I don't know his exact grade point, but it is somewhere between 3.6 and 3.8. My daughter is currently in college and I am paying for her as well. Since our circumstances allow for us to pay for college without impacting our retirement I'm glad to do it. If it were otherwise we would have explored other options.

In our family my wife's parents paid for all of her college education and my parents helped as much as they could. That probably affected our decision to pay for the kids. It didn't seem to be a detriment to our outcome having college paid for either. We didn't feel obligated to pay back our parents and don't expect to be repaid by our children either.

BearWolf
User avatar
schnoodlemom
Posts: 456
Joined: Mon Oct 20, 2008 3:06 am

Post by schnoodlemom »

1) Depends. I don't like the word "should" since it depends so much on ability to pay without jeopardizing other important goals like retirement and debt reduction... also depends on whether or not the kid would best be served by a college education handed to them. I like the minimum GPA requirement idea. I had a full tuition scholarship to a private liberal arts undergrad requiring a minimum 3.0 (tough science curriculum). It kept me on track. For our kids we're planning on helping out tremendously but we also expect contribution on their part... not sure what form it will take at this point. They're only 9 & 12.
2) NO
User avatar
HomerJ
Posts: 21282
Joined: Fri Jun 06, 2008 12:50 pm

Post by HomerJ »

Because I have the money, I'll pay for state college... $15k a year for everything...

Kid wants to go somewhere else that costs more, then it's up to them to find the money (scholarships, student loans, etc.)

If I couldn't afford state college, then the kid would go to community college and live at home...
williamg
Posts: 225
Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2007 7:36 am

Post by williamg »

Should? Don't know. Never occurred to us. We paid for both daughters although each had scholarship help. We wanted to. Didn't need an outside opinion either way.
User avatar
HomerJ
Posts: 21282
Joined: Fri Jun 06, 2008 12:50 pm

Re: Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

Post by HomerJ »

ClubberLang wrote:It's often documented that parents should plan on paying for their children's college costs, almost as if the student is entitled to it. Two questions:

1) Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

2) If the answer to #1 is yes, do grads have an obligation to repay their parents?
Oh, to answer the question as stated

(1) Only if the parents can afford it.
(2) No
User avatar
HomerJ
Posts: 21282
Joined: Fri Jun 06, 2008 12:50 pm

Post by HomerJ »

Opponent Process wrote:
market timer wrote:It always astounds me how many families are willing to spend $200K over four years just for college.
can be either of two things (or both, who's to say?):

1. just another way to scoreboard friends and family.
2. an incredibly selfless act and maybe the wisest use of your money.
I submit that it's probably not a wise use of money. Put that $200k in investments when your kid turns 18, and he can skip college, surf the world as a bum, and still be in good shape to retire at 60... :)
Last edited by HomerJ on Sun Sep 20, 2009 7:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
Downeastah
Posts: 399
Joined: Sun Aug 26, 2007 9:39 am

Post by Downeastah »

No.

I pay half, and my son pays the other half (via Stafford loans). I'm a firm believer in students paying at least some of their tuition and expenses.

I paid 100% of my own.
"If everybody is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking." George S. Patton, Jr. | | "A man does good business, when he rids himself of a turd." King Edward I of England
KyleAAA
Posts: 9498
Joined: Wed Jul 01, 2009 5:35 pm
Contact:

Post by KyleAAA »

1.) maybe
2.) maybe
User avatar
Munir
Posts: 3200
Joined: Mon Feb 26, 2007 3:39 pm
Location: Oregon

Re: Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

Post by Munir »

ClubberLang wrote:It's often documented that parents should plan on paying for their children's college costs, almost as if the student is entitled to it. Two questions:

1) Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

2) If the answer to #1 is yes, do grads have an obligation to repay their parents?
-------------------------------------------------------

1) Yes- if they have the means to do it.

2) No.

Paying your children's college costs is part of being responsible parents.
User avatar
poisonivvy
Posts: 43
Joined: Sat Sep 12, 2009 9:32 pm
Location: Colorful Colorado

Post by poisonivvy »

I wouldn't say that my parents paid for my entire tuition--but they sure helped.

Every summer starting when I was 14, whatever I earned in working and saved in the bank account, they'd match half and make a lump sum deposit. Then we'd convert to CDs that would mature as I needed them throughout the semesters.


My grandma, a former teacher, put $5 a month away since I was born.


I still held down a part time job during each semester, and worked full time at internships during summer semesters.

I think our balance was fair--I didn't expect a hand out, but my parents were willing to help support me.

Graduated in 2006 with no student loans, and proud of it! 8)
User avatar
Steelersfan
Posts: 4129
Joined: Thu Jun 19, 2008 8:47 pm

Post by Steelersfan »

1. Yes, if they can afford it and if that's what they want to do.

2. No.
User avatar
celia
Posts: 16774
Joined: Sun Mar 09, 2008 6:32 am
Location: SoCal

Post by celia »

We always encouraged our kids to aim to do their best at school and apply for scholarships. It worked and they got some, but it didn't pay for all of it. We were glad to help out. We also filed for financial aid each year and they ended up getting grants from the (private**) colleges. The colleges take the view that the students AND his/her parents should pay according to their means before the college gives any aid. I guess we echo that view.

However, each circumstance is different. I have a friend who paid graduate tuition at Stanford for their daughter to become a teacher. If it was my child, I would tell her to go to a state school for the credential, since that is one of the things they specialize in.

For grad school, they are on their own . . although we provide medical insurance.



** P.S. The out-of-pocket cost to attend a private college is often less than the cost for the state college. This is because many (most?) students in private colleges file for financial aid and they tend to graduate in 4 years. At public colleges, if courses are full or the student has to work to support him/herself, it will take longer than four years, which means more years of tuition and lost year(s) of gainful full-time employment. In other words, the "cost" is more than just the financial cost of the tuition.
User avatar
Nords
Posts: 293
Joined: Sun May 20, 2007 9:55 pm
Location: Oahu
Contact:

Re: Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

Post by Nords »

ClubberLang wrote:It's often documented that parents should plan on paying for their children's college costs, almost as if the student is entitled to it. Two questions:
1) Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?
Yes, if they'll move out-- and stay out.

On a more serious note, though, parents shouldn't delay their retirements to fund a kid's college. College students can get college scholarships. Retirees don't get retirement scholarships.
ClubberLang wrote:2) If the answer to #1 is yes, do grads have an obligation to repay their parents?
I think that already happens when they choose our long-term care facility for us...

We've been dutifully putting aside college funds since she was born, and now she's waiting to hear back on the NROTC scholarship. In just 329 days we'll be empty nesters, and it's hard to tell who takes more pleasure in that wing-fluttering on the edge of the nest-- us parents or her. So we've told her that when she graduates there will be some profit sharing.
* | * | Please see my profile for my next book. I don't read every post, so please PM or e-mail me to get my attention.
Grt2bOutdoors
Posts: 25625
Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2007 8:20 pm
Location: New York

Post by Grt2bOutdoors »

1) My parents paid for mine, and I will do the same for my kids.
That said, my parents did not pay for graduate school - I picked up the full freight for that one.

2) No. If the parents offer to pay, then it is exactly what it appears to be: a gift.
User avatar
tarnation
Posts: 2544
Joined: Thu Apr 26, 2007 12:36 am

Re: Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

Post by tarnation »

ClubberLang wrote: 1) Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

2) If the answer to #1 is yes, do grads have an obligation to repay their parents?
1)Yes. It is a parental obligation (unless maybe you live in an agriculture based economy). re: the comments that parents should only do it if they can afford it, if you can't afford kids, don't have any and only have as many as you can afford (please).

2) No. Are children obligated to repay other parental obligations, food, housing, clothing?
Image
User avatar
White Coat Investor
Posts: 17413
Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2007 8:11 pm
Location: Greatest Snow On Earth

Post by White Coat Investor »

No. Parents are obligated to feed them, house them, and clothe them until they turn 18. They are also obligated to send them to some school until then and not to beat them. Other than that, I think it is the parent's choice.
1) Invest you must 2) Time is your friend 3) Impulse is your enemy | 4) Basic arithmetic works 5) Stick to simplicity 6) Stay the course
adave
Posts: 567
Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2007 7:17 pm
Location: Houston

Post by adave »

i can't imagine NOT paying for college. i would even pay for med school or law school etc after that.

just like my dad did for me - and put me in a great financial position debt free when i started my first job.

of course, i come from a culture which values education above everything else. i think my folks would have sold their house or jewelery to put me through school.

if anything, it increased my motivation to succeed knowing that i had been given a great gift from them that i did not want to waste.
User avatar
marbleous
Posts: 191
Joined: Mon Oct 22, 2007 8:37 pm

Post by marbleous »

A few of items on this topic.....

1) Even though it was probably before Bogleheads existed, I think I became one when I was in college. I am a firm believer that most people would be best off being dirt poor when they turn 18, so they realize what the necessities of life really are. Living in cramped dorms/apartments, sustaining nutrition via beans and rice, and finding entertainment through friends' DVD collections and three dollar cups from house parties that kept you full of beer all night, is all one really needs when they are 20. Learning to live cheaply then, makes it a lot easier to save money now.

2) Being poor also focuses the mind. You have much more time to study if you are not busy planning your big spring break trip or wasting time playing video games in front of a giant TV.

3) Although you have to pay for college (instead of the other way around), I always thought of it as very much like a job. I never had a paying job during school, and I think that helped keep my attention on school. That said, I worked my ass off during the summers in high school and college (mostly landscaping and mowing lawns) so I could help pay for that privilege.

4) The deal in our household was that we kids were expected to pay for 1/2 of our tuition and living expenses during college, which I thought was more than fair. Due to my parents' and my hard work I managed to graduate without any student loan debt. Not having that makes graduation much more fun. It also allows you the freedom to make carreer choices that you want, and not ones that just pays your bills. When you graduate with mounds of debt, remember that you are not only poor as s***, like you were in college, but now you are poorer than s*** because you now have dug yourself in one gigantic hole. Hopefully, you were smart and did well in that school, otherwise you might be paying those loans off for decades.
IL Int Med
Posts: 180
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 11:51 pm
Location: Illinois

Post by IL Int Med »

1. If the parents cannot afford it - no

2. Even if the parents can afford part or all of it, the kid should still pay for part of it. Maybe Bank of Dad pay for the actual tuition but kid pays for room and board and book. The kid MUST have some skin in the game, or s/he might well party it all away

3. If the parents can well afford to chip in, but don't, it might be very hard for the kid to get any substantial amount of financial aid or loans from the school or the government. Of course, Bank of Dad can write the loan. But then how do you get your money back if the kid is a deadbeat?Take him to court? Remember that they pcik your nursing home...
flowerbuyer
Posts: 398
Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2008 4:32 pm
Location: Western Washington (state)

Post by flowerbuyer »

I believe parents should pay what they can comfortably afford towards their children's education, without going into debt or jeopardizing their retirement. My parents paid for my tuition and books, but I worked part-time and paid for my own room, board, and personal expenses. My ex-husband and I each paid 1/3 of our children's college expenses, and they each worked part-time to pay the other 1/3. We told them they had four years of our help, and after that, it would be all at their expense. They graduated in four years.

We deposited the money into their accounts monthly, and they were then responsible for paying everything. I also prepared a weekly budget for them, which included every possible expense, for the entire four years. They not only stayed within their budgets, but managed to save a little extra so they had something to tide them over until they found full-time employment.
User avatar
corner559
Posts: 457
Joined: Wed Nov 07, 2007 2:05 am

Re: Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

Post by corner559 »

ClubberLang wrote:It's often documented that parents should plan on paying for their children's college costs, almost as if the student is entitled to it. Two questions:

1) Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

2) If the answer to #1 is yes, do grads have an obligation to repay their parents?
1) ABSOLUTELY
2) ABSOLUTELY NOT
User avatar
theac
Posts: 802
Joined: Fri Dec 12, 2008 5:00 am

Post by theac »

marbleous wrote:A few of items on this topic.....

1) Even though it was probably before Bogleheads existed, I think I became one when I was in college. I am a firm believer that most people would be best off being dirt poor when they turn 18, so they realize what the necessities of life really are. Living in cramped dorms/apartments, sustaining nutrition via beans and rice, and finding entertainment through friends' DVD collections and three dollar cups from house parties that kept you full of beer all night, is all one really needs when they are 20. Learning to live cheaply then, makes it a lot easier to save money now.

2) Being poor also focuses the mind. You have much more time to study if you are not busy planning your big spring break trip or wasting time playing video games in front of a giant TV.

3) Although you have to pay for college (instead of the other way around), I always thought of it as very much like a job. I never had a paying job during school, and I think that helped keep my attention on school. That said, I worked my ass off during the summers in high school and college (mostly landscaping and mowing lawns) so I could help pay for that privilege.

4) The deal in our household was that we kids were expected to pay for 1/2 of our tuition and living expenses during college, which I thought was more than fair. Due to my parents' and my hard work I managed to graduate without any student loan debt. Not having that makes graduation much more fun. It also allows you the freedom to make carreer choices that you want, and not ones that just pays your bills. When you graduate with mounds of debt, remember that you are not only poor as s***, like you were in college, but now you are poorer than s*** because you now have dug yourself in one gigantic hole. Hopefully, you were smart and did well in that school, otherwise you might be paying those loans off for decades.
Right on the money! In my early 20's I was on a feeding-frenzy (with books). One great one I found was called "A Dictionary of Thoughts." Hardbound, almost 3" thick, and had a lot of great quotes, on a lot of subjects. I remember this one under "Education:"

"No education is complete until you've known hunger and cold"

I can hear all the mommies right now: "Oh no! Not my baby. I don't want my little (20 or 30-something) baby ever to be cold or hungry!" :cry:

I think what people really confuse with the word "Education," is actually just, "A Way to Fill Your Belly Until You Die." Or, "Getting a 'Respectable' Title attached to Your Name (i.e. ego)."

Try giving your kids a copy of "The Auto-Biography of Benjamin Franklin." Now that guy was no pretender! He worked hard (on himself) and got a REAL EDUCATION. You can't find that in 4 years, no matter how fancy a building you sit in. And no matter how much you (or somebody else) pays. That man did a lot more (both internally and externally) than just hanging a key on a kite string, but few people even know it. Yet before he died, he laid out the path he walked, when he decided to write his "How To" manual.

Of course he was pretty much the opposite of what "The Education System" is pumping out today (and for a big profit, of course). His main concern was with tangible results, not with getting the credit. He TAUGHT HIMSELF to be bigger than that. Anyway....
User avatar
DaleMaley
Posts: 1592
Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2007 7:04 pm
Location: Fairbury, Illinois
Contact:

Post by DaleMaley »

I paid my own way thru college by working summers and Christmas break. My entire college expense was $10,000 at our state university ($37,900 in today's dollars using CPI rate).

I started college funds in the Index 500 fund when both of my kids were born...under the Uniform Gift to Minors Act with Vanguard. By the time they were 18, these funds paid about 2/3 of my kid's college expenses. I also told my kids at an early age about their college fund...and that they would be getting Stafford loans for the difference....and they would have to pay back the loans.

One son graduated 2 years ago (in 4.5 yrs at total cost of $60K) and the other child is finishing her 5th year for her CPA by May 2010. My son was pretty impressed that this mutual fund paid for most of his college.......and as a consequence he has been maxing out his 401K using low cost Vanguard index funds.

I think you can use the experience of the child paying for some of his college education as a valuable learning experience for the child.....including mutual funds, paying back loans, etc.
Most investors, both institutional and individual, will find that the best way to own common stocks is through an index fund that charges minimal fees. – Warren Buffett
humbucker87
Posts: 24
Joined: Fri Feb 20, 2009 2:54 pm

Post by humbucker87 »

I agree with most others here that if it puts a financial strain on the parents then they certainly should not pay for their kids education.

In addition, coming from the perspective of someone who recently graduated and had his parents pay for his in-state tuition (aprx. 5000 a year) I can't be more appreciative of what my parents have done for me. That being said I can't tell you how many people I saw at school who I felt were squandering their parents hard earned money, taking it all for granted. So with that I very much feel its also up to the maturity of the kids.

My parents have enabled me to come out of school debt free which has thus far enabled me to save incredible amounts towards retirement and a down payment on a house. Could I have taken on student loans and paid them off eventually and been ok? Sure. But as a future parent I hope I can provide my children the same great opportunities that my parents did me, so long as they appreciate the value of hard work and determination.

Just my 0.02
Ron
Posts: 6972
Joined: Fri Feb 23, 2007 6:46 pm
Location: Allentown–Bethlehem–Easton, PA-NJ Metropolitan Statistical Area

Post by Ron »

flowerbuyer wrote:My ex-husband and I each paid 1/3 of our children's college expenses, and they each worked part-time to pay the other 1/3. We told them they had four years of our help, and after that, it would be all at their expense. They graduated in four years.
My wife/me did the same for our son; we paid 66%, he 33%.

- Ron
User avatar
SquawkIdent
Posts: 929
Joined: Tue Dec 23, 2008 6:14 pm
Location: Planet Earth

Post by SquawkIdent »

It depends, but here is what I'm doing. The kids had a choice of paying for the first year or paying 1/4 of each year. My 1st one chose paying the first year and getting it over with. Of course, he didn't have the money and didn't quaify for financial aid so I'm lending it to him. We are handling this very business like with a written contract with terms clearly stated. Money must be repaid within a year and a half after graduating...no exceptions.
User avatar
OAG
Posts: 1202
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2007 10:54 am
Location: Currently Central Ohio, USA

Post by OAG »

This is like the "pay off the mortgage or not" question. Personally, 4 kids, one went to service academy (full scholarship) now is a retired Navy 06 (26 years AD), one went ROTC Scholarship first 2 years, opted out of ROTC, then paid her own way for the remaining two years for a Registered Nursing Degree (UVA Graduate), one went two years to a local school then transferred to UVA for Registered Nursing Degree, now Nurse Practitioner. Last one, a boy who did not want to go to College went on AD in Army for 4 years, earned and used GI Bill after discharge, now a CPA working for IRS. We gave little funds but a lot of encouragement and motivation. My answer to the OP question is NO, but then I personally did not get my BS until I was 35 years old and maybe that colors my feelings.

My answer to the second question is also a NO. If you want to "gift" your kids a college education it should be just that, with no expectation of any "repayment". JMO.
OAG=Old Army Guy. Retired CW4 USA (US Army) in 1979 21 years of service @ 38.
Polaris
Posts: 468
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2007 1:28 pm

Post by Polaris »

theac wrote:In general...NO. Especially if it's a boy. You might just be educating him in something more important than anything taught in schools, like how to become a man.
I knew a family like this. The son was expected to pay his own tuition and worked his tail off driving a Coke truck and lugging soda around to restock vending machines while going to school full time. The daughters were not expected to work and were simply given a car and had 100% of their tuition paid by their parents. All are successful college-educated professionals now.

I guess the son "became a man" although perhaps it could be argued that the daughters never "became women". Maybe they just celebrate winning the gender lottery?
effillus
Posts: 252
Joined: Thu Oct 04, 2007 2:12 pm

Post by effillus »

My son attended a state school, so expenses were not that bad. He got some academic scholarships, and of the remaining cost, I paid a third, his mother paid a third and he paid a third with money he earned at summer jobs and by saving (he's relatively thrifty). He earned his master's degree at no cost (he had an assistantship that paid for his tuition and gave him a substantial stipend) and graduated with no student loan debt. At 24, he's working for a global engineering firm and is putting money away in his 401k and the Roth that we started for him as a graduation present. College turned out pretty well for us.
User avatar
theac
Posts: 802
Joined: Fri Dec 12, 2008 5:00 am

Post by theac »

Polaris wrote: I knew a family like this. The son was expected to pay his own tuition and worked his tail off driving a Coke truck and lugging soda around to restock vending machines while going to school full time. The daughters were not expected to work and were simply given a car and had 100% of their tuition paid by their parents. All are successful college-educated professionals now.

I guess the son "became a man" although perhaps it could be argued that the daughters never "became women". Maybe they just celebrate winning the gender lottery?
You gave me a good laugh with that one. :lol:
I guess I meant if you only had one OR the other. If you had both, I think you'd wanna be fair...and let her tow the line too! ha ha ha

Actually I didn't have a daughter so I can't comment on that, other than the above.
User avatar
ascenzm
Posts: 259
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2007 7:16 am
Location: PA

Re: Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

Post by ascenzm »

ClubberLang wrote:It's often documented that parents should plan on paying for their children's college costs, almost as if the student is entitled to it. Two questions:

1) Should parents pay their kids' college tuition?

2) If the answer to #1 is yes, do grads have an obligation to repay their parents?
1) No

2) n/a since the answer to 1 is No.

IMHO, if students had to pay for college themselves and the government grants/loans were eliminated, colleges would have to price their tuition at levels affordable to the students.

It's a national scandal what colleges charge for tuition, books and other fees. Of course they can do this because middle class American parents have been brainwashed into thinking little Jackson, Brandon, Connor, or Catelyn will be abject failures unless they get a college "education" costing $50,000/ year to get a degree in Political Science, Poetry or Art History. Meanwhile the Chinese and Indians are cranking out engineers and scientists by the boatload. Of course those countries aren't outsourcing their technical people or at least not to the extent of America.

Mike, who paid his own way through college by delivering newspapers/mowing lawns in high school and working minimum wage jobs during the summers between college years. Unfortunately with the increase in college costs well above the inflation rate, a young student could not duplicate what I did today unless they were able to land some high paying summer jobs. Of course in that case why would they bother going to college? :)
Avatar is a Japanese Cherry tree in Washington, DC during the peak cherry blossom time.
tibbitts
Posts: 23726
Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 5:50 pm

Post by tibbitts »

There are too many factors to give a simple answer. If it's viewed a gift, for example, the degree of the gift (if there are no scholarships available, etc.) may now be dramatically more than in previous generations, due to college costs dramatically outpacing general inflation. On the other hand, parents may be better able to take advantage of some of the substantial tax breaks (HOPE credit, etc.) that have become more generous recently.

It would also depend on the child - how responsible (s)he is, etc. But in general, if we had had a child, and if (s)he was still on speaking terms with us after 18 years, I'd probably have tried to pay for a basic education at a public college, and most expenses for living at home. I don't believe living away from home is a helpful experience, particularly for the first couple of years of college.

Paul
Sam I Am
Posts: 2062
Joined: Tue Feb 20, 2007 6:58 pm

Post by Sam I Am »

Message deleted.
Last edited by Sam I Am on Sat Oct 05, 2013 3:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
MaddHatta
Posts: 126
Joined: Tue Mar 17, 2009 1:37 pm
Location: New Haven
Contact:

Post by MaddHatta »

1.) Depends on the school! I am currently paying my way and there is no way to get around how much my parents make. If my Uni only took into account my income, I would receive more financial aid. I can understand some students not being able to take on such an expense if their Uni does the same. That being said each class I miss is $532.57 out the window and my pocket. I DO NOT MISS CLASS! It is a great motivator.

2.) Yes. Also, I do not like the GPA must be so high clauses. Students put enough pressure on them selves to do well let alone having to live up to their parents expectations.

Madd
mtl325
Posts: 255
Joined: Mon Nov 24, 2008 10:12 pm

Post by mtl325 »

It's a difficult decision. Even at the age of 18, the FAFSA requires that the parents' assets be included for aid determination. I believe an undergraduate is not emancipated for FAFSA purposes until 23 or 24. Basically, the student aid regs require the parents to pay for at least a portion of college (by reducing the amount of loans the student can take) through the expected family contribution.

Athletic scholarships are a great return on investment. I'm going to try to get my children interested in squash, fencing and crew (joking, sorta).
yoyo2
Posts: 37
Joined: Fri Jan 02, 2009 9:53 pm

Post by yoyo2 »

1. We told ours that if they go to top schools we will pay. But we plan to pay regardless.
2. No they don't have to pay us back.
GammaPoint
Posts: 2661
Joined: Sun Aug 02, 2009 10:25 am
Location: Washington

Post by GammaPoint »

1). I think it depends on the parent's circumstances and to be fair, their relationship with their kids.

2). Again, see #1. If the parents are willing and financially able, it obviously helps the student a great deal if they aren't shouldered with a bunch of debt early on. Debt early on in life might persuade some students to cut their education short (foregoing that doctorate, masters, or maybe bailing out in undergraduate) because they don't realize the value of their education until it's too late. And if you've got children (and grandchildren) who can't support themselves it could very well be a huge financial drain on the parents, so in some sense paying for a child's education could be seen as a sort of financial insurance on the part of the parents.
theac wrote:In general...NO. Especially if it's a boy. You might just be educating him in something more important than anything taught in schools, like how to become a man.
I think whether or not they are male is irrelevant. Financial responsibility applies to women just as much as men. If women are financially dependent on men and can't take care of themselves it makes it much more likely for them to be forced into a relationship that's not good for them.
User avatar
englishgirl
Posts: 2508
Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2007 4:34 pm
Location: FL

Post by englishgirl »

It is totally dependent upon the family circumstances. However, my own thoughts, for what they are worth, are:

1) Yes, provided that they are already saving up enough for their own retirement, and can afford to contribute to college. And, personally, I believe they should pay enough (if they can afford it) for the best state school in the child's home state - if the kid wants to go anywhere else more expensive, they should get scholarships/work/loans.

2) No.

I feel that not being burdened by student loan debt has been a big advantage in my life. But also, I became financially independent within 4 months of graduating, when I got my first post-college paycheck. While I don't think kids should pay their parents back, I also don't think they should depend on their parents any longer than necessary.
Sarah
medgar
Posts: 206
Joined: Tue Jul 08, 2008 2:38 pm

Post by medgar »

1. Maybe: We have told our son, who starts school next year, what we will pay each year for 4 years. The rest is his responsibility. Also, the check will be made out to the SCHOOL and MAILED to them.

2. Yeah right. It's hard enough to get a thank you from them for shelter, meals etc. we provide everyday.

Medgar
User avatar
norookie
Posts: 3016
Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2009 1:55 pm

Post by norookie »

:D
Last edited by norookie on Mon Oct 03, 2011 11:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.
pr
Posts: 35
Joined: Mon Jul 27, 2009 9:31 am

Post by pr »

This thread reminds me of a different one posted a couple of months ago re: How do you get your chidren to visit?

1)Yes. The child did not asked to be brought into this world. Having a child is a selfish decision by the parents; if you decided to have a child it is 100% your responsabilty until about age 25. I say 25 because of multiple imaging studies showing that the brain does not fully mature until that age. It is the parents responsability to pay for at least college regardless of current retiring savings. Yes- I am a parent.

2)No. See above.
Post Reply