Child's prenup

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QQQQ
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Child's prenup

Post by QQQQ »

Not an issue yet but getting close for our child. When does it make sense to have your child do a prenup before they get married? Should something happen to us, we sure would not want our $ going to someone in a childs failed marriage. Unfortunate but in today's world maybe quite necessary.
John3754
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Re: Childs prenup

Post by John3754 »

How does your child feel about this?
surfstar
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Re: Childs prenup

Post by surfstar »

*popcorn*
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QQQQ
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Re: Childs prenup

Post by QQQQ »

Haven't talked to them yet. Not really sure how/if it is appropriate.

Yes, I like popcorn!
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rob
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Re: Childs prenup

Post by rob »

If you want to control the world from the grave then look into a restrictive trust with all sorts of hoops they have to jump thru - at least you have the ability to contol how your money is passed....... hurling out the first kernal of popcorn :D
| Rob | Its a dangerous business going out your front door. - J.R.R.Tolkien
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LadyGeek
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Re: Childs prenup

Post by LadyGeek »

QQQQ - Consult with an estate planning attorney, as you should be able to direct your money to anyone you wish and exclude others. There is no automatic sharing of asset transfers, but it may depend on the state and I could very well be wrong.
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awval999
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Re: Childs prenup

Post by awval999 »

In case you are unaware you do not get to choose if your child chooses to get a prenup or not. Nor do you get to chose who they marry. Or live. Or do. Or work.
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Epsilon Delta
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by Epsilon Delta »

pages and pages on the subject, ending in the inevitable lock:

viewtopic.php?f=2&t=160288
Grt2bOutdoors
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by Grt2bOutdoors »

QQQQ wrote:Not an issue yet but getting close for our child. When does it make sense to have your child do a prenup before they get married? Should something happen to us, we sure would not want our $ going to someone in a childs failed marriage. Unfortunate but in today's world maybe quite necessary.
What about if the adult (child) has a successful marriage? :twisted:
Spend some of your money on competent estate planning attorney instead. Have the attorney draft up a trust that specifically addresses your wishes, before you do that pick up a copy of Beyond The Grave by Condon - then decide if you wish to proceed.
"One should invest based on their need, ability and willingness to take risk - Larry Swedroe" Asking Portfolio Questions
barnaclebob
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by barnaclebob »

Why don't you leave it up to your child. Where your money goes after you die affects you in zero ways.
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Ged
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by Ged »

If you really want to be sure that your child maintains control of the money the way to do it is through a trust. A prenup is the wrong tool for this.

A trust has other benefits as well, including protection from creditors.
hicabob
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by hicabob »

barnaclebob wrote:Why don't you leave it up to your child. Where your money goes after you die affects you in zero ways.
I agree. I do my best to teach my kids the ways of a Boglehead. After I'm gone it's up to them to carry on (or not).
Twins Fan
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by Twins Fan »

QQQQ wrote: When does it make sense to have your child do a prenup before they get married?
Well, when the child and their future spouse want to do a prenup before getting married would make sense. But, I like to keep things simple. :wink: :happy

Your question in this one is pretty much moot, since you don't even know how the child feels about a prenup... and you don't get to make that choice for your child anyway... and you get to decide how your money gets assigned/designated if something should happen to you... and...
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The529guy
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by The529guy »

I haven't read it myself, but I've heard that "Beyond the Grave: The Right Way and the Wrong Way of Leaving Money to Your Children (and Others)" is a great book.

Don't forget to use the Bogleheads Amazon link!
Professor Emeritus
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by Professor Emeritus »

I have two daughters, both married , both mothers, both Homeowners, one JD, one PhD.

I raised ADULTS. Neither is a child. They have children.
Tamahome
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Re: Childs prenup

Post by Tamahome »

LadyGeek wrote:QQQQ - Consult with an estate planning attorney, as you should be able to direct your money to anyone you wish and exclude others.
Bingo. Even if there is a prenup- if your child moves to another state, the prenup may not be valid in that state. State requirements differ on this issue. Further, your child may, in a moment of weakness, love, emotion, or rational decision agree to revoke the prenup. If you are determined to control the money, the most effective way is to get a trust attorney involved. Trusts can be set to allow money for a specific purpose, a set amount or percentage on a regular basis, or in some very creative ways. Of course, the more protection you have, the less flexible the trust is. (Typically, for a spendthrift trust to provide absolute protection against the beneficiary's creditors, you must set a certain amount or percentage that individual receives on a regular basis WITHOUT the ability to petition for disbursements outside of those regular payments. In Georgia, for example, you can ask for an exception for medical needs. The downside is that medical creditors can now get to the corpus of the trust, but other creditors still cannot. This, of course is just an example, and you will want to discuss this matter with an estate planning attorney in your state).

I will say this, however. If a child of yours wishes to have a prenup, it can be easier on them to use you as the scapegoat. "My parent is demanding this... but we get a pile of cash if we do it..." That way, it makes it more of an us v. them rather than something that causes strain on their relationship. Of course, you must recognize that you are potentially now the villain.
I'm not a financial professional. Post is info only & not legal advice. No attorney-client relationship exists with reader. Scrutinize my ideas as if you spoke with a guy at a bar. I may be wrong.
travellight
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by travellight »

^ wow, interesting perspective on the scapegoat concept, dulocracy.
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MSchleicher
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by MSchleicher »

Ged wrote:If you really want to be sure that your child maintains control of the money the way to do it is through a trust. A prenup is the wrong tool for this.

A trust has other benefits as well, including protection from creditors.
+1

A prenup is an agreement between the two parties that are getting married in the event of separation – not an in-law and the wife-to-be. If your son didn't mention a prenup, it isn't your place to request one. If you want to setup a trust, that is your choice.
an_asker
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by an_asker »

QQQQ wrote:Not an issue yet but getting close for our child. When does it make sense to have your child do a prenup before they get married? Should something happen to us, we sure would not want our $ going to someone in a childs failed marriage. Unfortunate but in today's world maybe quite necessary.
This thread might (or might not) help you decide.

*in before the lock*
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Re: Child's prenup

Post by LadyGeek »

This thread has run its course and is locked (topic exhausted, no added value to continue). Several suggestions have been made, including a link to a relevant thread: Does My Daughter Need A Prenup? (also locked)

See: Forum Policy

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