Do you dream about retirement?
Do you dream about retirement?
I definitely do being some 30+ years away (if I make it that long, of course).
My father in law recently "retired" from his job to begin a consulting/teaching path. I don't know the specifics of their finances, but I guarantee he is extremely well off and could live a very fulfilling life doing whatever he wanted. Yet, he decided to continue working instead of taking any time off to enjoy life.
Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area.
It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
What are your plans in retirement?
My father in law recently "retired" from his job to begin a consulting/teaching path. I don't know the specifics of their finances, but I guarantee he is extremely well off and could live a very fulfilling life doing whatever he wanted. Yet, he decided to continue working instead of taking any time off to enjoy life.
Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area.
It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
What are your plans in retirement?
- bertilak
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I'm retired and dream about work!
May neither drought nor rain nor blizzard disturb the joy juice in your gizzard. -- Squire Omar Barker (aka S.O.B.), the Cowboy Poet
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Exam dream?bertilak wrote:I'm retired and dream about work!
I always wanted to be a procrastinator.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I hope I never have to retire.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I think it's a mistake to dream about something that might take place when you are much older and in uncertain health. I think we should plan for retirement, but not at the expense of living life today. To me, the goal of retirement planning is to ensure that I will not be forced to do something undesirable to make ends meet - like bag groceries, work at McDonalds, or worse, eat cat food. Beyond that, I have no expectations.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I don't literally dream about it, but I certainly look forward to it! I don't hate work, but there's no getting around the fact that I spend far too much of my life doing what someone else wants me to do.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
At 33 I didn't give retirement a single thought.
At 43 I think about it daily. Once you get to a certain point financially you really don't need more money. You need more time. You need more flexibility. You need less stress.
It is very hard to overcome the "work = life", "buy more stuff" mentality. It is like going against a 30 mph wind daily. Pay off your debt, save at a high rate, use Boglehead principles to invest, keep expenses low, stop keeping up with the Jonses. These things give you options. Options at 43, options at 53, options at 63.
If we just worked "enough" to not save a little or not go backwards, we'd still come out ahead of the game.
Having options and "choosing" the options for many is the hardest part. Just five more years, just 8 more years.
At 43 I think about it daily. Once you get to a certain point financially you really don't need more money. You need more time. You need more flexibility. You need less stress.
It is very hard to overcome the "work = life", "buy more stuff" mentality. It is like going against a 30 mph wind daily. Pay off your debt, save at a high rate, use Boglehead principles to invest, keep expenses low, stop keeping up with the Jonses. These things give you options. Options at 43, options at 53, options at 63.
If we just worked "enough" to not save a little or not go backwards, we'd still come out ahead of the game.
Having options and "choosing" the options for many is the hardest part. Just five more years, just 8 more years.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I've been retired for 3 years and I still dream about work. Typically situations involving co-workers or old bosses I didn't like.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Yes.
Whenever we have to come back from our short weekend trips (2-4 days +/-) that we take quite often now, we imagine what it would be like to not have to go back to work on Monday morning. We could stay wherever we were and take our time to see and do the things that we didn't have a chance to get to. There's a whole world out there to explore and time is ticking away. I already know what my cubicle looks like, why would I want to stay here any longer than I need to?
Whenever we have to come back from our short weekend trips (2-4 days +/-) that we take quite often now, we imagine what it would be like to not have to go back to work on Monday morning. We could stay wherever we were and take our time to see and do the things that we didn't have a chance to get to. There's a whole world out there to explore and time is ticking away. I already know what my cubicle looks like, why would I want to stay here any longer than I need to?
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
surfstar wrote:Yes.
Whenever we have to come back from our short weekend trips (2-4 days +/-) that we take quite often now, we imagine what it would be like to not have to go back to work on Monday morning. We could stay wherever we were and take our time to see and do the things that we didn't have a chance to get to. There's a whole world out there to explore and time is ticking away. I already know what my cubicle looks like, why would I want to stay here any longer than I need to?
Interesting, I never thought about that.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I find this to be very true. I often wish my employer would give me more time off rather than a raise each year. Of course, then the workload would need to be balanced so I can actually use the time off, which is another issue.bloom2708 wrote:Once you get to a certain point financially you really don't need more money. You need more time. You need more flexibility. You need less stress.
I just turned 59 this year, and we are on track to retire in 2016. We bought our retirement home last year, and are very much looking forward to relocating there. So yes, in my situation I do find myself thinking about and planning for retirement often.
When I was younger and it was much further off in the distance, not so much.
Dave
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I am about 4 to 5 years to reach my financial independence. I am obsessed with retirement calculators these days and run one or two of them almost daily, just to calm me down. I am day-dreaming about my retirement life.
One thing bothering me most is to determine if I should spend or save more money NOW. I know I would spend more when I reach my financial independence. But how about if a health problem develops before that?
One thing bothering me most is to determine if I should spend or save more money NOW. I know I would spend more when I reach my financial independence. But how about if a health problem develops before that?
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
My stepdad continues to work in his mid 70s. He has a great deal of autonomy and flexibility, and he loves his work. Occasionally the bureaucratic tasks will wear him down though, and he will start to wonder whether it's worth it. But once he gets past the BS, work is really what he loves to do. And unlike your FIL, he does make time for family.kazper wrote:I definitely do being some 30+ years away (if I make it that long, of course).
My father in law recently "retired" from his job to begin a consulting/teaching path. I don't know the specifics of their finances, but I guarantee he is extremely well off and could live a very fulfilling life doing whatever he wanted. Yet, he decided to continue working instead of taking any time off to enjoy life.
Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area.
It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
What are your plans in retirement?
I on the other hand, would quit in my mid-40s if I could. I don't dislike work (I don't wake up dreading it), it just isn't anything special.
And I think that's the difference. Some people really enjoy their work, and would prefer to spend some portion of their time on it. Others are just putting in the time, so to speak.
- tennisplyr
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Funny I've been retired for 3 years and have dreams or more likely nightmares I like it and love the complete freedom. Some people are so entwined with their careers that they can't get out, some love it. It takes planning like anything else in life.truenorth418 wrote:I've been retired for 3 years and I still dream about work. Typically situations involving co-workers or old bosses I didn't like.
“Those who move forward with a happy spirit will find that things always work out.” -Retired 13 years 😀
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Not while I'm asleep. I suppose you could say I daydream about it some, but I'm at the point where I'm making concrete plans, so even that's a little gray.
My plans are to spend about half the year living in/near the city where my parents/siblings/aunts/uncles/cousins all live (also is a decent midpoint between my grown kids), and the other half of the year at a cabin in NE Minnesota. That's at least the plan for the "early" retirement years.
My plans are to spend about half the year living in/near the city where my parents/siblings/aunts/uncles/cousins all live (also is a decent midpoint between my grown kids), and the other half of the year at a cabin in NE Minnesota. That's at least the plan for the "early" retirement years.
Don't do something. Just stand there!
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I will be eligible for a full pension in about 8 years. I don't dream about or have any intention of retiring at that point but it will certainly give me the ability to do something different if I choose to do so. I sometimes think about what might happen then but it is really a long way off and there are too many unknowns to get too specific about making plans. I'm a lot more concerned about making time for family and fishing NOW rather than waiting for later.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
No. I'm about 20-25 years from retirement and while I may feel differently as the time nears, I look forward to going to work on most days. I've been a teacher for the past decade. I found my previous work to be fine but not all that fulfilling. I couldn't wait for the work day to end back then. I decided I didn't want to spend life that way and switched careers when I was in my late 20s. I don't make a ton of money but live comfortably, am able to save a good amount, and enjoy my job very much. Having summers off does help keep the battery charged and makes a huge difference.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I dream about financial independence and the opportunity to work on more self directed projects that may or may not be income producing. It's coming to a nice compromise with my wife about what that means for household expenses that is sometimes a bit tricky.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Yes! I have been dreaming about waking up and having the day to myself since I was your age. Now at 50 and my wife turns 55 in March, we talk about it more and more. I'm still 12 to 15 years away, but who knows maybe my savings will grow so I can exit stage left at 60 or 62.
I don't need fancy vacations or material possessions. I just want to be a free spirit and come and go as I please.
As far as your father-in-law goes, I find it sad. It's usually the opposite when people become a grandparent, they are always around. In fact sometimes too often. It sounds like there is more to his story than meets the eye.
Maybe he feels if he slows down he will no longer be useful and many people feel if they retire from their jobs they retire from life altogether and don't have many hobbies. Also, it might be his passion and this is how he enjoys living his life. Having said that, there is no excuse for not want to visit your Grandkids. IMHO of course.
I don't need fancy vacations or material possessions. I just want to be a free spirit and come and go as I please.
As far as your father-in-law goes, I find it sad. It's usually the opposite when people become a grandparent, they are always around. In fact sometimes too often. It sounds like there is more to his story than meets the eye.
Maybe he feels if he slows down he will no longer be useful and many people feel if they retire from their jobs they retire from life altogether and don't have many hobbies. Also, it might be his passion and this is how he enjoys living his life. Having said that, there is no excuse for not want to visit your Grandkids. IMHO of course.
Choose Simplicity ~ Stay the Course!! ~ Press on Regardless!!!
- JDCarpenter
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Been planning it for many years, but didn't "dream" about it much (if at all) in 20s-40s. Too focused on careers and raising the kids.
Now, with pretty solid plans of retiring between 7/17 and 7/18 (final date depends on getting a replacement doc for DW's group after she gives notice), we are starting to dream a bit. (in '17, we'll be 57/56).
Now, with pretty solid plans of retiring between 7/17 and 7/18 (final date depends on getting a replacement doc for DW's group after she gives notice), we are starting to dream a bit. (in '17, we'll be 57/56).
Our personal blog (no ads) of why we saved/invested: https://www.lisajtravels.com/
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
My father was a very driven high energy guy who rose to a pretty high level in his career. He retired at age 52 and never looked back. He had a longer retired life than work life.
I have a couple of long term friends who told me they plan to work until they drop. They asked me questions like 'what are you going to do when you retire?'. At the time I didn't know, but I did know my father was very happy in retirement.
These friends are retired now and are loving it.
I've been retired for about 18 months now. It took me about 6 months to get used to it. Now I can't imagine going back. The freedom is awesome.
I have a couple of long term friends who told me they plan to work until they drop. They asked me questions like 'what are you going to do when you retire?'. At the time I didn't know, but I did know my father was very happy in retirement.
These friends are retired now and are loving it.
I've been retired for about 18 months now. It took me about 6 months to get used to it. Now I can't imagine going back. The freedom is awesome.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Not to steal the thread, but what is with that? My parents and in laws are the same. We tell everyone they can come over whenever they want and stay as long as they want at our house and none of them seem interested in seeing their one grandchild. Since all the other siblings are not married on both sides the only other one will be ours as well whenever we have a second it isn't like they are going to have many opportunities.kazper wrote:Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area. It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
The funny thing is they always moan about, "She has gotten so big and growing so fast we miss not seeing her". Yet when the rubber meets the road no one shows much interest. I never thought a person could get an "F" for being a grandparent.
Good luck.
"The stock market [fluctuation], therefore, is noise. A giant distraction from the business of investing.” |
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
This is definitely true. It has taken him around the world quite a few times and provided him with countless interesting stories over the years.Also, it might be his passion and this is how he enjoys living his life.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
If you mean do I think about it daily and imagine what it will be like, then, yes I do dream. I am currently enjoying two months off of work as I transition from one career to another. During this time off I have moved cross country, traveled overseas for 2 weeks, explored our new city on foot and by car , dined out frequently, visited parks, walked a lot, exercised some, visited the suburbs, gone to concerts and comedy clubs, and slept until I woke up naturally without an alarm. This time off made me realize that I would be fine as a retiree. It also made me realize that I will need to save more and work longer so I can enjoy the life style in the location that I desire. I could retire now but then I wouldn't have the life style in the location that we desire. So, I am trying to find the balance.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I can remember my MIL saying "everyone comes to you during holidays because it is difficult to travel with kids". They are much better off financially, yet we are the ones expected to make the trips. Go figure!? Granted, they cover most of our expenses once we arrive, but as others have stated, it's not all about money...staythecourse wrote:Not to steal the thread, but what is with that? My parents and in laws are the same. We tell everyone they can come over whenever they want and stay as long as they want at our house and none of them seem interested in seeing their one grandchild. Since all the other siblings are not married on both sides the only other one will be ours as well whenever we have a second it isn't like they are going to have many opportunities.kazper wrote:Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area. It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
The funny thing is they always moan about, "She has gotten so big and growing so fast we miss not seeing her". Yet when the rubber meets the road no one shows much interest. I never thought a person could get an "F" for being a grandparent.
Good luck.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
From my side of the keyboard.
Well, I do not feel sorry for Kazper's father in law, if his desire is to die with his working shoes on then more power to him. I never had dreams about retirement and I do not have dreams about work. My plans for retirement? Well, I have retired and I am not looking for a job, and my plan is to enjoy life to the fullest. I used to get up early to hit the road to work--now I get up early to hit the road for my lung distance workout. Life is good, I should have retired two years ago.
Well, I do not feel sorry for Kazper's father in law, if his desire is to die with his working shoes on then more power to him. I never had dreams about retirement and I do not have dreams about work. My plans for retirement? Well, I have retired and I am not looking for a job, and my plan is to enjoy life to the fullest. I used to get up early to hit the road to work--now I get up early to hit the road for my lung distance workout. Life is good, I should have retired two years ago.
~ Member of the Active Retired Force since 2014 ~
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
It's usually voluntary.anonforthis wrote:I hope I never have to retire.
Chaz |
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- Crimsontide
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Yes, all the time.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Yes although this is problematic as I know that when I retire depends on more than just my actions alone. As a compulsive planner I find it annoying that the economy isn't more predictable.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Not actually dream (as in when I am asleep).
I don't know if I'd call it dreaming, but maybe you would.
We PLAN for retirement. I plan to retire when I am 57, which is 12 years from now. At that time, I will be eligible for my federal gov't pension and full health bennies. My DH will be 52 at that time, and he will retire then as well. I have spreadsheets that project out our expenses, income sources, investment accounts etc, that I update on a regular basis
We THINK about retirement, in the sense that we think about what we want to do (travel, volunteer, move to a lower cost area etc.).
I don't sit around and daydream about not working (I like my job, overall), I don't go to travel websites and plan exotic trips etc....to me that would be dreaming. Although DH is planning a motorcycle trip around the world, so that is probably in the dreaming category...
I don't know if I'd call it dreaming, but maybe you would.
We PLAN for retirement. I plan to retire when I am 57, which is 12 years from now. At that time, I will be eligible for my federal gov't pension and full health bennies. My DH will be 52 at that time, and he will retire then as well. I have spreadsheets that project out our expenses, income sources, investment accounts etc, that I update on a regular basis
We THINK about retirement, in the sense that we think about what we want to do (travel, volunteer, move to a lower cost area etc.).
I don't sit around and daydream about not working (I like my job, overall), I don't go to travel websites and plan exotic trips etc....to me that would be dreaming. Although DH is planning a motorcycle trip around the world, so that is probably in the dreaming category...
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Are you saying that he doesn't enjoy life?I don't know the specifics of their finances, but I guarantee he is extremely well off and could live a very fulfilling life doing whatever he wanted. Yet, he decided to continue working instead of taking any time off to enjoy life.
Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area.
It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
Or that he doesn't enjoy something that you wish he would enjoy?
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I'm really sorry to hear that your FIL is not more interested in connecting with your family.
I'm definitely dreaming about retirement, but not at the expense of living in the present. I am planning to retire well before 65 so I can spend a lot more time with family and friends. I'm not really dreaming of retirement because I hate my job, I just hate the idea of being dependent on a paycheck form a big corporation that can discard me on a whim.
I'm definitely dreaming about retirement, but not at the expense of living in the present. I am planning to retire well before 65 so I can spend a lot more time with family and friends. I'm not really dreaming of retirement because I hate my job, I just hate the idea of being dependent on a paycheck form a big corporation that can discard me on a whim.
**Insert witty and/or insightful quote here**
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I dreamt about retirement in 2007 and 2008 when the pieces of my early retirement plan were falling into place but were not quite all there yet. This Friday will mark 6 years of retirement since I retired in 2008 at 45.
- dbCooperAir
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Dream more about reaching financial independence. Looking forward to the point where I can quit saving, make enough to live the simple life I live now while keeping what I saved until I do/if retire. Its all about options and small goals:)
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
This is very interesting because my sister had the first grandchild about 18 months ago, and I'm sure she could say the same thing about my parents. She lives in the Midwest and my parents are in the South, so it's not an inordinately long or expensive flight (too far to drive in a day though). She has said things like "come anytime!" but my parents don't actually feel especially welcome to visit. It would help immensely if my sister was more specific and said something like "we'd love to have you guys up during XYZ weekend or holiday." They'd be there in a heartbeat with a specific invitation. I think they feel they'd be intruding and not fit into the routine otherwise. Plus there are some latent feelings of being miffed that she moved across the country and doesn't seem interested in sharing the child's life with them. Meanwhile her husband's parents seem to visit frequently (which they mainly find out about via social media), and my mom thinks my sister prefers their company. At the same time I could see how their lack of insistence on seeing pictures or coming to visit would demonstrate a lack of interest from my sister's perspective. A lot of this is probably just miscommunication.staythecourse wrote:Not to steal the thread, but what is with that? My parents and in laws are the same. We tell everyone they can come over whenever they want and stay as long as they want at our house and none of them seem interested in seeing their one grandchild. Since all the other siblings are not married on both sides the only other one will be ours as well whenever we have a second it isn't like they are going to have many opportunities.kazper wrote:Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area. It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
The funny thing is they always moan about, "She has gotten so big and growing so fast we miss not seeing her". Yet when the rubber meets the road no one shows much interest. I never thought a person could get an "F" for being a grandparent.
Good luck.
"An investment in knowledge pays the best interest." - Benjamin Franklin
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
At 56, I consider myself "semi-retired". I quit mega-corp at 50. Spent a couple of years doing all of the things that needed to be done around the house, going to my DS baseball tournaments, etc. Eventually, I got bored and found a seasonal job related to my old field. I work 4 months (part time) and take the rest of the year off. My DW "retired" for all of 6 months and then went back to work. I'm beginning to think she'll never retire since work is where her friends are and she's likes what she does. Financially, we don't "need" to work, but I think we'll probably do some type of work (part-time) for probably another 10/15 years.
I used to dream about retirement and now that I've been out of the megacorp rat race for 6 years, I know I can never go back to the full-time workload and put up with all that cr@p again, but for some reason I'm finding "full" retirement is not for me. I don't have enough hobbies, etc to keep me busy and I'm not one to sit around and watch TV and otherwise do nothing.
I used to dream about retirement and now that I've been out of the megacorp rat race for 6 years, I know I can never go back to the full-time workload and put up with all that cr@p again, but for some reason I'm finding "full" retirement is not for me. I don't have enough hobbies, etc to keep me busy and I'm not one to sit around and watch TV and otherwise do nothing.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I'm 31, and I dream about retirement in proportion to how satisfied I am with my present life. Retirement is a placeholder for a time in the future when things will be "the way they should be".
Thinking excessively about retirement has been a cue for me to look around and be mindful of why I'm unhappy with my present circumstances. Sometimes I can make changes by the end of the day (e.g. mend a relationship that's on the rocks). Other times I've had to chip away for years (e.g. fixing a broken employment situation - I literally took icy cold showers for years to brace myself for going to a job that I've since moved on from). You're never too young to responsibly quit your job and find one that sucks less!
Thinking excessively about retirement has been a cue for me to look around and be mindful of why I'm unhappy with my present circumstances. Sometimes I can make changes by the end of the day (e.g. mend a relationship that's on the rocks). Other times I've had to chip away for years (e.g. fixing a broken employment situation - I literally took icy cold showers for years to brace myself for going to a job that I've since moved on from). You're never too young to responsibly quit your job and find one that sucks less!
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I don't necessarily dream about my retirement. Mainly because I can't imagine myself at 55 or 60 years old. It still seems too far away.
But...I am a day dreamer. I often day dream about what I would rather be doing if I were financially independent right now. I wouldn't be working. I find work stressful - regardless of the field. I am not really cut out for the stresses of work life but tolerate it so that I can live a certain lifestyle.
If I were financially independent, I'd be living a pretty care free lifestyle. Some might even think my "dream" day to be pretty boring.
I'd start the day over coffee, breakfast, and a newspaper in a diner;
Then walk to a park and read a book;
Take jog or walk, or workout in a gym;
Grab a late lunch, with a book;
Take a nap;
Watch some tv, play some video games;
hang out with friends;
read before bed;
go to bed.
Every few months or so I'd maybe take a trip. I hope to have this lifestyle in retirement. But I don't usually dream about it "as retirement." I dream about it in the sense that "gee, I would really rather be doing something else right now."
But...I am a day dreamer. I often day dream about what I would rather be doing if I were financially independent right now. I wouldn't be working. I find work stressful - regardless of the field. I am not really cut out for the stresses of work life but tolerate it so that I can live a certain lifestyle.
If I were financially independent, I'd be living a pretty care free lifestyle. Some might even think my "dream" day to be pretty boring.
I'd start the day over coffee, breakfast, and a newspaper in a diner;
Then walk to a park and read a book;
Take jog or walk, or workout in a gym;
Grab a late lunch, with a book;
Take a nap;
Watch some tv, play some video games;
hang out with friends;
read before bed;
go to bed.
Every few months or so I'd maybe take a trip. I hope to have this lifestyle in retirement. But I don't usually dream about it "as retirement." I dream about it in the sense that "gee, I would really rather be doing something else right now."
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Every time we pack up and leave our lake condo, I dream about retirement.
- Mel Lindauer
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
When I first retired and would visit my old business, which was being run by my sons, I had an uneasy feeling that they were going to lock the door and not let me leave!
I will have to say that I'm busier now in retirement than when I ran a business. I didn't go looking for the things I'm involved with now, but I do enjoy doing them (moderating two investing forums, writing books, writing columns for Forbes, heading the team that puts on the annual Bogleheads Conferences, member of the City's Board of Adjustments, President of the John C. Bogle Center for Financial Literacy, Vice President of the Daytona Beach Shores Community Foundation, etc.). The nice thing is that I could give up some or all of these activities and it wouldn't affect my lifestyle one iota.
I do choose to sleep late, walk 4-5 miles on the beach each day and play golf a couple times a week. Retirement life has been (and is still) good 17 years after leaving the business world.
Here's hoping each and every one of you attain the financial freedom to do whatever works for you.
Best regards to all.
Mel
I will have to say that I'm busier now in retirement than when I ran a business. I didn't go looking for the things I'm involved with now, but I do enjoy doing them (moderating two investing forums, writing books, writing columns for Forbes, heading the team that puts on the annual Bogleheads Conferences, member of the City's Board of Adjustments, President of the John C. Bogle Center for Financial Literacy, Vice President of the Daytona Beach Shores Community Foundation, etc.). The nice thing is that I could give up some or all of these activities and it wouldn't affect my lifestyle one iota.
I do choose to sleep late, walk 4-5 miles on the beach each day and play golf a couple times a week. Retirement life has been (and is still) good 17 years after leaving the business world.
Here's hoping each and every one of you attain the financial freedom to do whatever works for you.
Best regards to all.
Mel
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
No more do I dream about retirement. I live retirement. Wonderful, busy, enjoyable time of life. However, I have a recurring dream of my working years even after 16 years retired, so I guess I dream about work. In that dream I am doing my job, running a factory, working with my coworkers, just as if no time has passed. And in those dreams none of them have aged, including me. But, some of them have died, and the factory is closed. They are all still alive within my mind, though. The dreams are pleasant, thankfully.
Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered you will never grow. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
My wife and I are nearing the finish line and don't see our 4 grandchildren as much as we should, or as much as we'd like to, and we live in the same town. If your dad is still working and lives "several States" away I think you may be judging him too harshly. Your "dream" may be different than his.kazper wrote:
Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area.
It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
What are your plans in retirement?
I don't know your situation or your relationship with your father but he sounds fiercely independent. Part of the reason I don't see my grandchildren as much as I'd like to is my unshakeable desire for my children to be independent and to make their own decisions without my sometimes heavy handed influence. Independence can be a two edged sword and requires a delicate balance which sometimes succeeds in intent but fails in practice.
Young parents are so focused on their own children that they can sometimes assume that other relatives should be also. Just because he isn't there doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't care.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
There can be some expectations on who should be the one visiting.Meg77 wrote:This is very interesting because my sister had the first grandchild about 18 months ago, and I'm sure she could say the same thing about my parents. She lives in the Midwest and my parents are in the South, so it's not an inordinately long or expensive flight (too far to drive in a day though). She has said things like "come anytime!" but my parents don't actually feel especially welcome to visit. It would help immensely if my sister was more specific and said something like "we'd love to have you guys up during XYZ weekend or holiday." They'd be there in a heartbeat with a specific invitation. I think they feel they'd be intruding and not fit into the routine otherwise. Plus there are some latent feelings of being miffed that she moved across the country and doesn't seem interested in sharing the child's life with them. Meanwhile her husband's parents seem to visit frequently (which they mainly find out about via social media), and my mom thinks my sister prefers their company. At the same time I could see how their lack of insistence on seeing pictures or coming to visit would demonstrate a lack of interest from my sister's perspective. A lot of this is probably just miscommunication.staythecourse wrote:Not to steal the thread, but what is with that? My parents and in laws are the same. We tell everyone they can come over whenever they want and stay as long as they want at our house and none of them seem interested in seeing their one grandchild. Since all the other siblings are not married on both sides the only other one will be ours as well whenever we have a second it isn't like they are going to have many opportunities.kazper wrote:Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area. It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
The funny thing is they always moan about, "She has gotten so big and growing so fast we miss not seeing her". Yet when the rubber meets the road no one shows much interest. I never thought a person could get an "F" for being a grandparent.
Good luck.
Both my wife and I come from large families. Grandparents were not going to travel to multiple families spread far and wide.
They had stayed close to relative and the children went to visit parents, not the other way around.
We spent many a Thanksgiving eve and Christmas eve traveling 8 hours on snow-covered roads with RWD, sometimes in a
blizzard with young kids (pre cell phone) where we were one mishap away from losing the entire family.
My brother with the only child, who had a 12 hour trip in the same kinds of conditions, now has to go to visit his child-less
child and his wife who only live about 4 hours away. He does get miffed that his son does not return the favor of traveling
on holidays a shorter distance and with less danger. (Help is a cell phone call away.)
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I dream of writing again, which coincidentally was a consequence of my vivid dreams. After my first retirement 5.5 years ago from a Mega-corp I begin my workday long before my wife leaves for work and sometimes continue long after she returns home from her full time job. This immersion into the world of deadlines and the ever growing demands of my employer have curtailed my writing that was prolific and fulfilling before the change in routine.
I hope to return to that endeavor, but if inspiration is lacking there's always the kayak and long days on the lake, as well as the continuing education of my granddaughters in the subtleties of trout fishing.
I hope to return to that endeavor, but if inspiration is lacking there's always the kayak and long days on the lake, as well as the continuing education of my granddaughters in the subtleties of trout fishing.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I dream of going back to Mozambique. I lived there a few years, and it was great. Maybe I'll take my grandkids?
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
In the years leading up to retirement my thoughts would sometimes drift to "what I would be doing now if I didn't have to be going to work." On occasions when I had an off-site appointment and was heading to the office mid-morning, I often wondered why there were so many cars on the roads (suburbs). What were all those people doing if they weren't "in the office"? And I thought about being able to drive around in the middle of the day.
Now I'm living it. Driving around. Taking light rail downtown and exploring. Just staying home. I did have a "work dream" shortly after my last day, but those kinds of dreams are usually caused by stress, something that is currently in short supply.
Enjoy a few daydreams but don't neglect living in the moment.
Now I'm living it. Driving around. Taking light rail downtown and exploring. Just staying home. I did have a "work dream" shortly after my last day, but those kinds of dreams are usually caused by stress, something that is currently in short supply.
Enjoy a few daydreams but don't neglect living in the moment.
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I'm curious did you move several states away from the grandparents or did the grands move several states away from you? I think it does make a difference.kazper wrote:I can remember my MIL saying "everyone comes to you during holidays because it is difficult to travel with kids". They are much better off financially, yet we are the ones expected to make the trips. Go figure!? Granted, they cover most of our expenses once we arrive, but as others have stated, it's not all about money...staythecourse wrote:Not to steal the thread, but what is with that? My parents and in laws are the same. We tell everyone they can come over whenever they want and stay as long as they want at our house and none of them seem interested in seeing their one grandchild. Since all the other siblings are not married on both sides the only other one will be ours as well whenever we have a second it isn't like they are going to have many opportunities.kazper wrote:Case in point, we live several states away. He rarely sees us or his grandchildren. Despite that, he didn't make any trips out to visit us, even when he had conferences in the area. It simply boggles the mind (pardon the pun) that he would not slow down after "retirement" and spend more time with family he rarely sees.
The funny thing is they always moan about, "She has gotten so big and growing so fast we miss not seeing her". Yet when the rubber meets the road no one shows much interest. I never thought a person could get an "F" for being a grandparent.
Good luck.
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
Not retired yet but this is what I'm afraid because I love what I do.bertilak wrote:I'm retired and dream about work!
- DonCamillo
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Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I wish I did. I don't need retirement, as I only go to school to teach three days a week thirty weeks a year, which gives me plenty of time to do "retired" things. I also enjoy teaching, having a reason to get out of bed in the morning, and the social interaction in the faculty cafeteria.
I can't imagine retiring "from" teaching. I would want to retire "to" something. But without the dreams, what can I retire to?
The only things I can think of I could gain from retiring is the ability to travel in September (the best month for the places I like) and to spend the whole winter away from snow. That is not enough.
I can't imagine retiring "from" teaching. I would want to retire "to" something. But without the dreams, what can I retire to?
The only things I can think of I could gain from retiring is the ability to travel in September (the best month for the places I like) and to spend the whole winter away from snow. That is not enough.
Les vieillards aiment à donner de bons préceptes, pour se consoler de n'être plus en état de donner de mauvais exemples. |
(François, duc de La Rochefoucauld, maxim 93)
Re: Do you dream about retirement?
I write software for a living, and most days, I like my job. Some days / weeks / months are rough though. It doesn't take many 60 hour weeks before it starts to wear me down.
I look at it like I'm building a safety net, in as literal a metaphor as I can make it. Some day, when I am financially independent, I can pursue whatever work or study I find interesting without regard for the job prospects or compensation. I can take any reasonible risk I like without fear of consequence or failure.
I don't know what I'll do when i get there, but I have about 10 years to figure that out
I look at it like I'm building a safety net, in as literal a metaphor as I can make it. Some day, when I am financially independent, I can pursue whatever work or study I find interesting without regard for the job prospects or compensation. I can take any reasonible risk I like without fear of consequence or failure.
I don't know what I'll do when i get there, but I have about 10 years to figure that out