retiredjg wrote:Similar professional backgrounds does not mean similar savings for retirement. We don't know any facts on that issue.
I would think long and hard about mixing my finances (marriage or real estate) with any man who does not bring similar assets (or more) to the table. You would have little to gain and a whole lot you could possibly lose, with little or no time to recoup.
I'm not saying to nix the relationship. I'm saying that you, alone, are responsible for protecting your financial future. That pertains to any relationship you might have, romantic or otherwise.
I'm sure this can be done, if he has the resources to contribute his part. The details will depend on what suits each of you. What is working so far? What is not working so far? That would surely be a big clue as to what will work for you in the future.
Barefootgirl wrote:I would be very interested in hearing about the experiences of those here who have cohabitated or married later in life - and how they managed finances, goals, family issues and particularly if from different countries - how they split their time and resources and any special complications that arose. Thank you, BFG
Barefootgirl wrote:Thank you all for the comments. This is why I enjoy this particular forum - full of pragmatic thinking.
I keep mulling over what this relationship brings at this point in my life - and what it brings best is companionship.
II sold my real estate during the divorce. My guy owns property in Peru - a home in the city and a home at the beach. Here in the US we currently rent separate residences. I understand many of his assets are still in Peruvian financial institutions. Given the currency difference, I don't know how it would compare to my net worth in US dollars...of course, I would want to know more about that if we moved closer to a merger.
I especially appreciated the suggestion about us each paying for the living expenses in our respective home countries - that seems to make sense, on the face of it.
MP173 wrote:My youngest is 18 and going off to school in the fall. This is really affecting me, know that we will be empty nesters.
staythecourse wrote:This is an easy question to answer because there is no answer.
I think you are looking for some confirmation that what you want to do is okay and if you are honest with your significant other I don't see why not pursue separate finances. Just like there is no problem combining finances if one is inclined. Don't let society guide you in making decisions, i.e. getting married for what others may think. Do what is right for you both.
Barefootgirl wrote:To complicate matters, he is a dual citizen of the US and Peru.....My guy owns property in Peru - a home in the city and a home at the beach. .... I understand many of his assets are still in Peruvian financial institutions.
momar wrote:My mother got remarried at a similar age, because he wanted to. She gave up her house and moved in with him, but they kept finances completely separate and had everything set up by professionals. There has been tension because my sister and I are successful and independent while his kids all live locally and have periodic problems. One moved in for over a year; my mom hated it.
I wouldnt move in with someone unless their kids were already independent. You will be the outsider and will always lose that battle. And since they are living with their parent, they will behave like children and will mooch and not pitch in.
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